I hate I have to miss today with Courtney. Her first day of treatment and I’m at work. Tim set me up with his manager, Ben, and after a long discussion and meeting a few other people, I start at Livingston, Pierce, & Johnson today. The day is bittersweet. After a month and a half of no job, I’m back at it, something I wanted. Juliette and I are stronger than ever. But Courtney begins the hardest journey she’ll ever be on. I want to be there to support her.

I am, though, in a way. With this job, I can increase how much I put aside for Abby and Audrey. And start saving for a special gift for Juliette. One that I’m sure she’ll love after the photos she showed me from her weekend with Carly. Ice skating in a wedding dress? She does wear an elf outfit for a few weeks a year, but the Juliette I’ve come to know isn’t that spontaneous. I like this change.

“How was your first day?” Juliette asks me after my first eight-hour shift at the job. She’s made me dinner, and I can’t wait to dive into the steak she’s made. The tenderloin looks like it’s cooked to perfection, much like the angel sitting across from me.

“Excellent. Ben is allowing me to hire my own team.”

“What? That’s fantastic! You can build the team you want. I know you’re not working entirely for yourself like you wanted, but that’s a good compromise.”

I wanted to be my own boss. This works, too, though. I’m able to work a nine-to-five job, have insurance provided for me, and a steady paycheck. “This is exactly what I want,” I tell her as I reach my hands across and take a hold of them. She squeezes tight, and I lean over the table and kiss her.

“Dig in. I hope you like it.”

I know I’ll love it. She doesn’t cook often, but when she does, it’s amazing. I cut off a piece of the steak, and the first bite is as tender as I imagined. “Mmm. You sure know your way around a steak.”

“If you play your cards right, that’s not the only thing I know my way around.” She winks as she slides the fork between her teeth.

Carly’s wedding is in a little over a month, and I can’t wait to dance with Juliette at it. Our bodies close together, the music playing, the wine flowing. “I’ve been wanting to ask you something.”

“Oh?” She sets her fork down and gives me her undivided attention.

“With Carly’s wedding coming up, and your rendezvous in the wedding dress, does that change how you feel about marriage?” I want to feel her out before I make the biggest purchase of my life.

“You’re getting straight to the point, aren’t you?”

“Well, my family is very important to me. I’m okay if you never want to get married. I really am. As long as I’m with you, I’m happy.”

“But.”

“Yes, there is a but. It’s not an ultimatum if that’s what you’re thinking.” I don’t believe in ultimatums. Love doesn’t come with requirements. “Marriage is something I hope you think about. It’s something I hope to one day have with you. I understand if it’s not on the table with you, but—there’s the but—but I want you to tell me now if it’s not so I can plan accordingly.”

She stands from the table and moves her chair next to me. “So you’re making plans?” Her hand touches my knee and moves up my thigh.

“Maybe.” My voice cracks like a teenage boy.

“If anyone has taught me to believe in love again, it’s you.” Her hand squeezes my thigh now as she kisses me. I nibble on her lip as we break apart.

“Never in my life did I think I’d fall in love with an elf.”

She playfully hits me on the shoulder. “It’s not like I’m an elf all year long.”

“Even if you were, I’d love you anyway.”

That’s the first time I’ve said those words to her. The first time I allowed myself to be vulnerable. I wanted to say it so many times before. Each time I feared she wouldn’t reciprocate. I’d be left with my confession of love in the air with her words of silence slicing through me. Today, as I begin to move forward with my life and my sister starts to save hers, I need to tell her. This new year means new beginnings. And I want Juliette to be in it, and she has to know how I really feel.

Her eyes moisten as she takes a breath. “Landon, I love you, too.”

When our lips touch, I know her faith in marriage has been rejuvenated, and I know that this year I will ask her to be my wife.