Four and a Half Months Later

Truly

I never imagined what a difference four months could make in a person’s life until the right man found and refused to give up on me.

And when you added in the fact that I was now a momma to the cutest five-month-old little girl on the face of the planet, you might say I was living the American dream.  You know, the him, me and baby makes three.

Almost.

Life would have been perfect if Pax could be home with us. 

Unfortunately, the military doesn’t schedule its training maneuvers around fledgling new families – especially not the Delta Force.  I’ve always known that, and it had never bothered me when I’d been married to Yancy.  Back then, when he would leave, I’d only have myself to be concerned about.  Sure, it could be lonely, but the distance was easier to tolerate back then with Yancy.

Now, though, things had changed.  I was very much with Pax, and we were happy.  Together,  we’d spent the last three months not only getting to know each other better, but also learning how to be parents to a baby we both now thought hung the moon. 

It hadn’t all been sunshine and roses.   Pax and I had stumbled a few times along the way.  Or rather, I had stumbled.  Oh, who was I kidding?  I’d fallen flat on my face a couple of times.  Insecurity would do that to a girl… especially a girl who’d already had trust issues thanks to her late husband.  So, when an ex-girlfriend showed up at our house out of the blue one evening to try and reconnect with my guy the month after I moved in, I didn’t react well.  In fact, I’d become what could only be defined as a suspicious shrew.  That’s what happens when you take one woman with trust issues, add her to a sexy man with plenty of ex-girlfriends, and mix in a baby that had suddenly decided she hated sleep.  Thankfully, though, Pax was a very patient man.  He’d quickly informed the ex-girlfriend that he was very happily committed to his new family (in front of me, no less) and sent her on her merry way.  Then, he’d spent the next two weeks reassuring me in every way he could that Liberty and I were everything he’d ever wanted.  It had taken some strong effort on his part, but Pax finally convinced me he was telling the truth not by turning on the charm or by feeding me a line, but with brutal honesty.

And I believed him.

Believed in him.

Kinda a new experience for me.

It was one that I liked.  A lot.

I knew I must have been wearing a goofy smile on my face when the baby giggled at me from her perch in the baby swing in the corner of the living room.  I couldn’t help it.  That was the kind of look I got on my face when I thought about Pax these days.  Two more weeks and he’d be home, though.  “You and I can make it that long, can’t we, Miss Liberty?” I cooed, crossing the room to pick up the baby as I glanced at the clock on the wall.  “Uh oh!” I continued dramatically, jiggling Liberty’s, (or Libby, as I taken to calling her) foot.  “8 o’clock!  You know what that means?” I asked, unhooking her from the swing’s harness.  “Bedtime!” I announced pulling her out of the swing.

 Libby’s answering squeal made me chuckle.  She was such a good baby and getting bigger every day.  I knew it wouldn’t be too awfully long at all before she was crawling around and getting into all manner of mischief.  I couldn’t wait!

Hefting my baby girl onto my hip, I smacked a wet kiss to her chubby cheek and pulled another laugh from my new daughter’s lips.  “Who’s a mommy’s girl tonight?” I asked, when she turned her head to snuggle into my shoulder.  “Or is that you’re just tired, huh?”

“Da! Da! Da!” Liberty babbled up at me, kicking her little feet furiously as she bounced against my hip.

Eyes wide, I couldn’t help staring down at her in surprise and delight.  “Oh, my God,” I whispered.  “Did you just call for your daddy?  You miss him, too, don’t you, sweetie?  Just two more weeks, baby.”

Rubbing her face against my shirt, she continued to speak, the sounds coming out like gibberish.  Pressing my lips to the crown of her head, I laughed.  “Do me a favor.  Let’s keep this little dada speech a secret between us girls and you just say it again when daddy gets home, okay?  We’ll pretend it’s the first word alllll over again.  And maybe throw in a Ma Ma Ma to make it fair,” I suggested, dropping another kiss against her forehead when she looked up at me and offered a toothless grin.

God, there was no better feeling in the world than watching your baby smile up at you, I thought happily as I carried my red-haired beauty into the nursery.  I made quick work of changing her soggy diaper and slipping her into a clean light pink sleeper.  Humming a familiar lullaby as I picked her up from the changing table, I rocked her in my arms as we walked to the crib.   Gently depositing her in the middle of the baby mattress, I quickly reached up, winding her mobile.  I smiled when her eyes lit up as she focused on the dancing stuffed jungle animals above her head as Brahms’ lullaby played softly.  “Sweet dreams, Libby,” I whispered, leaning over the crib and reaching inside to pat her belly as she kicked her feet in the air.  “Momma and Daddy love you,” I assured her, watching her for a few seconds more before straightening and grabbing the baby monitor from the chest. 

Softly closing the door behind me as I slipped into the hall, I yawned as I glanced down at my watch.

8:15 pm.

Perfect!  I still had plenty of time to indulge in a glass of wine and a bubble bath before my little Libby bug got up again and demanded her six-ounce midnight bottle.  I couldn’t complain, though.  After she had that bottle, she’d sleep straight through until 6:30 or 7:00 o’clock in the morning.  If you asked me, I was a lucky mommy to have her on such a good schedule.

I padded through the house on my bare feet to the kitchen, my mind already on what steamy romance I’d read on my Kindle tonight.  Sure, reading about sex wasn’t nearly as satisfying as the fooling around Pax and I had engaged in during the last three months, but I was lonely and a book boyfriend wouldn’t get me in any trouble with Pax. 

Walking into the kitchen, I opened the fridge and extracted my bottle of pinot noir before reaching for a wine glass in the dish drainer.  Pouring the wine into my glass, I bit my lip as I mentally calculated the number of months it had been since I’d had actual sexual intercourse and winced when I finally arrived at my answer.

Sixteen months.

Sure, Pax and I had gotten each other off with our mouths and hands, but we hadn’t taken that final step together.  My choice.  I hadn’t felt quite ready yet.  But these last couple of weeks without him had finally allowed me the time I needed to realize that I was in the kind of love with him that was never going to go away.  And more than that, I felt safe with Pax. 

So, it was time.

When he came home from his training exercise from God-only-knows-where-because-Delta-believes-everything-should-be-a-secret, I was going to take that final leap with him and give him a magical homecoming filled with plenty of scorching sex. Grinning, I collected my wine, my cell, and the baby monitor and headed to the master bedroom. 

Twenty minutes later, I sighed as I soaked in water up to my shoulders as the tub bubbled around me.  Holding my Kindle in front of me, I focused on the story I was reading and frowned as my cell phone rang.  Groaning, I frowned as I reached for the slim white phone.  “This better be good,” I grumbled as my slippery fingers nabbed the iPhone.  “I was just getting to the good part,” I complained, then gasped as I saw Pax’s familiar face on my screen.  Swiping left quickly, I lifted the phone to my ear.  “Hey, honey!  I can’t believe you’re calling me!  I thought you said you’d be radio silent for at least the first three weeks,” I greeted him excitedly.

“Hey, baby!  We actually got a break from the field to come back to the barracks and grab a shower and some shut-eye.  I decided I needed to hear your voice a hell of a lot more that I needed some Zs.  How are my girls doing?”” Pax’s deep, sexy voice asked.  “Are my two gorgeous girls staying out of trouble?”

“We are,” I assured him with a happy smile as I slid deeper in the water.  “In fact, I just put our girl down a little bit ago.  She’s snoozing away.”

“And what about you?” he asked.

Leaning my head back against the fiberglass tub, I chuckled softly.  “I’ve successfully avoided trouble, too.  I think the most exciting thing I’ve done today is paint my nails,” I shared, holding out my free hand to look at the polish on my fingers.

“Oh really?  What color?”

“I went with a bad girl color.  Sensual Scarlet,” I purred dramatically.

“Sounds sexy.  I can’t wait to see it on you, Bambi,” he rumbled.  “I miss you and the princess something fierce.  Never hated being away from home as bad as I do right now.”

“We miss you, too, Pax.  Especially right about now,” I said suggestively as I shifted in the tub.  I wasn’t sure if it was a good idea to tease him like this, but I wanted to make sure I kept all the lines of communication open while he was gone – even the slightly naughty ones.

“Why do I hear water splashing?” Pax asked me curiously. 

“Oh, you might have caught me soaking in our tub,” I informed him coyly, licking my lips as I heard his low moan.

“Bambi, that’s just cruel.  You’re tellin’ me that right now, you’re all naked and wet?” he asked in a lower voice.

“Uh huh,” I confirmed, biting my lower lip.  “I decided to spend a couple of hours with one of my book boyfriends.  Maybe givin’ myself some self-love.”  His low growl bolstered my confidence.

“How ‘bout you throw that Kindle down and spend some quality time with the flesh and blood man that would kill and die for you,” he ordered gruffly.  “But you can tell me all about this self-love you plan on givin’ yourself.  You gonna pet my pretty pussy, baby?”

“Your pussy, huh?” I teased.

“Fuck, yeah, that pussy is mine.  A fact I will take great delight in reminding you of just as soon as I get back home,” he returned, his voice low and gravelly.  “Believe me, Bambi, I miss that sweet pussy almost as much as I miss you.  Shit, you’ve got me hard as a fuckin’ rock just thinking about tasting it again.”

“Shhhhh…. As much as I love your dirty mouth, I really don’t want any of your Delta brothers overhearing anything about my kitty, Pax,” I chastised him self-consciously.

“Good thing I have this room all to myself then.”

“Seriously?” I questioned him hopefully.

“Yep.  You wanna play, baby, you can play with me.  I promise I’m much better than any book boyfriend you’ll ever have.  Now, be a good girl and slide that delicate little hand of yours between those gorgeous thighs for me.”

“Pax….,”I murmured into the phone, suddenly feeling a little nervous.  After all, if I got him all wound up listening to me get off, where would that leave him?  Would he be tempted to go out and find some random chick?

“Baby, I can hear you thinking.  What’s wrong?” he asked me gently.

“It doesn’t seem fair that I get to feel good and you just listen,” I answered worriedly.  “I don’t want you to be tempted to go blow off steam.”

“Bambi, the only person I’m gonna blow anything with is you…right here on this phone.  You’ve already got my dick hard enough to pound nails.  You and I both are gonna practice a little safe love.  Together.  Haven’t you ever had phone sex before, baby?”

I shook my head, forgetting he couldn’t see me. 

“Bambi?” he called.

“I’m here,” I said quickly.  “And no.  I’ve never done that before.  I’ve read about it in magazines, but never got that adventurous.”

“Then tonight is lucky for both of us,” Pax crowed.  “All you gotta do is what I tell you, sweetheart.  Now, slip that hand of yours between your legs and slide your fingers up your slit until you tap your little love button.”

Holding my breath, I did as he said, moaning as my fingertip grazed my clit.  It felt both naughty and good.  “Okay,” I whispered into the phone.

“Good girl.  Did you find your clit, Bambi?”

“Uh huh,” I replied quickly, anxious to get his next order. 

“Good,” he approved instantly.  “I want you to take two fingers and start drawing circles around.”

Following his directions, I cried out as I stimulated that hidden bundle of nerves.  “Ohhhh,” I cried, lifting my hips as the water churned around me.  “Feels good, Pax,” I panted as I kept circling my clit, my wetness coating my fingertips.

“You getting that pussy all slippery for me?” he rumbled in my ear. 

“Yes,” I breathed, my head falling back on my neck as I pressed the phone harder to my ear.  “I’m so slick.  I can feel my little clit pulsing,” I shared on another moan.  “Wh-what about you?   What are you doing?”

“Me?” he returned.  “Well, right now I’ve got my cock in my hand, yanking it and wishing it was your mouth wrapped around me, swallowing me down.”

“Yes!” I whimpered, rubbing my pussy harder.  “Tell me more.”

“You wanna hear how I can’t wait to get back to you?  How I wanna lay you down in our bed and straddle your face?  How I’ll make you take my dick into that gorgeous mouth and suck me down until my balls are almost bursting while I lick that beautiful pussy you have?  Or do you think you’ll be ready for us to fuck?  I can’t wait to lay you down and fill you up.”

“Oh, God, yes!” I pant, flicking my clit as his words painted an erotic fantasy in my mind.  “I can’t wait until you finally take me.”

“Then you best limber up the next couple of weeks because once I start fucking that tight little cunt, I don’t think I’ll ever be able to stop.  Fuck, baby, you’ve got my dick near bursting,” he confessed raggedly.  I could hear the wet slap of his fist sliding up and down his cock and it only made me burn brighter.

“I can’t wait, Pax,” I wailed as I felt my orgasm approaching.  “I’m gonna cum,” I bit out desperately.

“Yeah, baby, I’m almost there, too,” he encouraged.  “Cum for me.  Let me hear it,” he ground out as I listened to him beat his dick faster.

I screamed as my release washed over me, distantly hearing Pax’s jagged voice rasp, “Fuck!  You sound so sexy, Bambi!  Can’t wait to have my cock in you.  Fuck, I’m gonna shoot!”

For the next minute or so, I could only hear the sound of my own heaving breathing as I struggled to regain my composure.  “Pax?” I called into the phone when I could finally form words again.   “Are you okay?” I asked, listening as his heavy pants filtered through the phone line.

“Good God, I think you just killed me, Tru,” I heard him chuckle weakly.  “I just erupted like a goddamn volcano, babe.  That was HOT,” he praised. 

“Yeah?” I smiled.

“Hell, yeah.  Do you feel more relaxed?” he asked.

Considering I was a boneless heap sitting in the rapidly cooling water, relaxed was a huge understatement.  “I feel amazing.  You?”

“Like I could conquer the world.  Did you mean what you said, Bambi?  About being ready to make love when I get home?  You ready to take that next step with me?” he asked seriously.

I swallowed hard.  It was moment of truth time.  “I can’t wait for you to come home so we can share that together, Pax.  I’m ready.”

“You just made my night, my week, my month and my year, Truly.  I love you so much, baby.”

I wanted to tell him I loved him, too, but I wanted to be looking in his eyes the first time I said the words.  So, instead, I replied, “Hurry home to me, Pax.  Libby and I miss you like crazy.”

“A couple more weeks, babe, and I’m yours.  Give our girl a kiss for me and get some sleep.  I’ll call again as soon as I can.”

“Okay.  Be safe, honey.”

“Always,” he replied.  “Bye, baby,” he said before the line went dead.

Resting the back of my head against the tub, I prayed the next two weeks flew by.