Chapter 18

It was a few days later and they were back at their special park. Travis parked the truck; Penny jumped out first, then unbuckled Belle and lifted her out.

“You sure you’re okay here?” Travis asked.

“Belle needs to run around, the paparazzi have mostly disappeared or gotten bored, and Kip’s kept his word. So yeah, we’re good. She needs sunlight and so do I. There’s no one around—we’ll be fine. Go for your run. We’ll be right here.”

“Okay, sugar. I’m just going to go down to the beach, up to the pier, and back around. Forty-five minutes tops.”

“Go.” She shooed him off. “Don’t worry about us.”

“Can’t seem to help it,” he mumbled as he turned and left.

The fresh warm air felt wonderful on her skin, and she could smell the salty beach from where they were.

“Where do we start, Belle?”

Belle made a giggling noise and waddled toward the swing. She lifted her arms in the air so that Penny could put her into the seat. After a few minutes of being pushed, Belle began to fuss, saying, “Mama, off.”

Penny took her out, and Belle pointed to the small play area that had a slide and a little bridge for toddlers. There were a few other kids playing there and other parents sitting nearby. Belle ran, falling once on the way, and climbed up, then slid down. She then met a little boy and together they went down the slide.

“Looks like my Alex made a friend.”

Penny smiled. “Looks that way.” She extended her hand. “Hi, I’m Penny, and that’s my daughter, Sarabelle.”

“It’s nice to meet you. I’m Julie. Glad to see another kid his age here. Usually they’re either too big or too little.”

“I know what you mean.”

For the next five minutes Julie told her all her secrets to get Alex to eat vegetables, and Penny told her the best way to get dirt stains out of cotton.

“It’s been nice meeting you, Penny,” Julie said as she got ready to leave. “I try to bring Alex here around this time every day. Maybe I’ll see you around.”

“That sounds great. Thank you.”

“Alex, honey, say goodbye to your little friend.”

Penny glanced over and saw that Belle wasn’t with Alex. She stood and looked around. “Belle?”

“Alex, where’s Belle?” Julie asked.

The little boy shrugged.

“Belle?” Penny looked behind the slide, but there weren’t many places for her to hide in the playground. But in the trees that surrounded them…well, that was another story, one that scared her.

“Belle!” Penny began to search frantically.

“Alex, where did your friend go?” Julie asked urgently.

“Over there.” He pointed to the dense clusters of mangroves that eventually led to the beach.

With trembling hands Penny took out her phone.

Travis was on the tail end of his run when his phone rang.

“My girls miss me already?” he answered.

“Travis! She’s gone!”

Her scream sent him into a full sprint.

“What the fuck are you talking about?”

“Belle!” she yelled breathlessly. “I was looking at her, I swear to God, and then I turned around for a second. One second and she was gone!”

“Hang up. Call 911. I’m almost there.”

She was gone? What the hell did that even mean? he thought as he ran full speed toward the play area. That little blond girl who took up so much space in his heart. The one who had sent his life into disarray, bottles and diapers everywhere. She was gone? No, it couldn’t be. No fucking way. He put on another burst of speed. In the distance he could hear sirens blaring. As he reached the park, he immediately spotted Penny standing next to a woman holding a little boy. Both women were yelling Sarabelle’s name.

“Penny!” he called.

She turned and spotted him, then ran toward him. “Travis, oh God, Travis. She was here. Right now. Alex and her, they were running around, I was sitting right here. Right here, they were right there!” She sobbed. “Alex, the little boy, says she went over there.”

“Ma’am?” said a police officer, coming up to her.

“Talk to the officer,” Travis instructed Penny. “I’m going to look around.”

He could hear Penny crying hysterically as she spoke to the cop. The woman and the little boy stood by Penny. The playground was small, but the area around it was enormous. It was practically in the middle of a forest. From where they were now, past the trees, maybe two miles away, it opened up to a beach. There were a lot of places a kid could hide, Travis thought. But Belle was small, with tiny feet, and she had just learned to walk. There would be no way she could go far on her own.

He had a very bad feeling. He pulled out his phone and looked through his contacts.

“Yo, man, what’s up?” Iggy answered.

“Need help. You in town?”

“Yes. What’s going on?”

“You know Sarabelle, Penny’s little girl?”

“Yeah.”

“She’s missing.” Saying the words out loud caused a boulder-sized lump in his throat. But he had to be strong. He couldn’t lose his shit. Someone had to keep it together. Travis quickly explained the situation and gave Iggy some info on Lawrence and Kip. Iggy was a former Army Ranger who now worked in IT; Travis knew he did some hacking for the government.

Travis hung up and jogged back to Penny.

“Travis! I can’t lose her. We have to find her. You have to find her!” Penny sobbed.

“I’m going to find her. Don’t even doubt that for a second.”

Ten minutes turned into thirty.

Thirty turned into an hour.

All their friends were now manning a search party, along with most of Tarpon Springs’ police department. As he searched, Travis waited for Iggy to call back.

“I’m losing my fuckin’ shit,” Travis exploded. “Where the fuck is she?”

“Why don’t we go for a drive?” Enzo suggested. “The cops are scouting this area. Let’s go to her favorite spots. She loves ice cream, right? Let’s go there.”

Travis needed to move. Standing there going in circles was driving him crazy, and seeing Penny hysterical was screwing with his ability to think rationally.

His phone rang. “Got it. I’m a minute out,” Iggy said into the phone, then clicked off.

“Iggy’s almost here,” Travis reported to the others.

“We’ll follow you,” Jack said. “Slade, Tony, Cain, come with me.”

When Iggy pulled up in his car, Enzo slid into the back, but Travis went to the driver’s side. “I’ll drive,” he told Iggy. “You’ve got one leg and you’re playing with that computer. I need us to make it safely to Belle.” Iggy rolled his eyes but got out and went over to the passenger side.

“If we weren’t in a crisis, I’d tell you to go fuck yourself. Remind me when this is all over,” Iggy retorted. “So, anyway, I traced that number you gave me, and I finally got it. He’s about four miles from here. Is that the baby daddy’s number?”

“Yeah, and that motherfucker isn’t supposed to be in Florida.” Travis gripped the steering wheel tightly. “I’m going to kill him if he hurts one hair on her head, I swear to God.”

“I think we should call the police,” Enzo said.

“Fuck that. I can’t have them seeing me killing someone.”

Enzo and Iggy looked at each other nervously.

Travis sped into the parking lot of a public beach a short drive away from the park. He didn’t even bother to take the keys out of the ignition when he jumped out of the car. “Straight, through the mangroves. By the beach,” Iggy instructed from behind him, but Travis didn’t need any directions because he could hear his little girl crying.

He ran toward the noise, losing his footing when the hardened surface turned into the sand. A moment later he could see Lawrence, who was facing the water and holding Belle, trying to calm her.

The noise from the waves and the wind made it difficult to hear much, but as Travis approached the pair and Belle spotted him over Lawrence’s shoulder, he did hear one thing—something he would never ever forget until the day he died, something that made his heart grow so big it felt as if it would explode out of his body.

“Daddy!” Belle yelled over Lawrence’s shoulder, her eyes fixed on Travis.

Lawrence turned around. Seeing Travis approaching him like a steamroller, he didn’t even attempt to put up a fight; he simply held out Sarabelle. Travis snatched her up and held her close as the sobbing toddler clung to him with all her strength.

Travis was torn between the need to hurt Lawrence and the primal need to hold Belle and soothe her. “It’s okay, baby. It’s okay. I’m here.” He could hear, faintly, the guys behind him.

“Daddy,” she repeated into Travis’s neck.

“Stay where you are. Hands where I can see them.” It was Jack.

“I want Mommy!” she cried, holding Travis tightly.

“Can you be brave for me, baby girl?” he asked, knowing she was too young to understand. “Be brave. Stay with Uncle Enzo for a minute.” Reluctantly he handed her to Enzo and asked him to walk away with her for a moment. He could hear her sobbing and crying for him and her mom, but he had to deal with Lawrence before the police arrived.

All the guys were there. His brothers. Yes, Jack was a cop, but he would understand. And even if he didn’t understand, Travis didn’t care, because he had to take care of this right now.

He charged forward, a roar he didn’t even recognize coming from deep in his chest. He grabbed Lawrence by the collar and swung hard at his face. “Motherfucker!” He kept hitting him left and right. “I’m going to kill you. You hear me?” He continued to hit Lawrence until he felt multiple hands trying to pry him off.

“Enough, brother. Your girls need you,” Tony said.

“Stop. Take a breath.” It was Slade this time.

“Why’d you do it? Just answer me that,” Travis yelled, his own voice unrecognizable against the crashing waves from the beach and the wind.

“My wife and I…before she left we tried to have kids, but it never happened. I didn’t even think I wanted kids, but then I saw Sarabelle and I felt so much regret. I wasn’t going to hurt her, I swear. I wasn’t even going to take her. I just wanted some time with her to get to know her. Just a little time with her, so that she knows who I am.”

Travis charged again. “No, you don’t get time with her. Never! You fucking never get time. You left. She’s mine. They’re both mine. I will fucking kill you,” he roared. Then he heard sirens from behind him, and strong arms were holding him back and away from Lawrence.

“Stop it, Travis. Get a handle on your shit. The other police officers are here,” Jack whispered. “Take him and get him out of here,” he said to the rest of the guys, pointing to Travis.

The guys pulled Travis away as squads of police cars pulled up. “You did good,” Cain said somberly as they walked Travis down the beach. “He deserved it. Would’ve done the same thing.”

“Go be with them.” Slade pointed at Penny, who was running at a full sprint toward Belle, followed by JL.

Seeing Belle in her mother’s arms was the breaking point for Travis—his knees buckled and he fell to the ground. As he watched his two girls cry in relief, in fear, in love, he closed his eyes, and for the first time ever he prayed, thanking God for keeping Sarabelle safe. If something had happened to her…it wasn’t even a thought he could bear to have.

Enzo put his hand on Travis’s shoulder. “They’re okay, man.”

“Never been so scared in my life,” Travis choked out.

Enzo squeezed his shoulder before walking away.

“Daddy!” Sarabelle wailed from her mother’s arms. Penny looked around until she saw Travis on his knees on the sand a few yards away. She ran over and fell to her knees in front of Travis, who embraced the two of them as tightly as he could.

“You found her!”

“I love her so much, Penny.” Travis closed his eyes and hugged Sarabelle, kissing her head, her cheeks. “I love you so much, my little Belle.”

“Wuv you, Twavis.”

Penny teared up.

Still holding Sarabelle tightly, he gripped Penny by the back of the neck and pulled her in, pressing his lips to hers. “And her momma—I’m crazy about her momma, too.”

Travis was eager to get his girls home after they’d given the police their statements. Francesca had taken charge of most of the legal matters, including having the escrowed funds wired back into Travis’s account. He couldn’t even process most of what was happening, but Frances insisted that Lawrence had breached his portion of the contract, and so Travis’s funds should be returned. Furthermore, even though he had returned the funds, legally Lawrence couldn’t revoke his relinquishment of parental rights.

Travis didn’t give a shit about the money; he only cared about Belle and Penny. He refused to leave their side; even when the EMTs took Belle into the ambulance to check her out, he made sure he went with them. He felt like he was moving in slow motion while the world was moving at hyperspeed around him.

It was the middle of the night when they finally arrived home. He carried Belle to the living room, and put her down on the couch. Penny sat next to her and put her arm around her daughter. Travis crouched down in front of them.

“Are you really okay?” he asked Belle, who was sleepy.

She yawned and said, “Bubba.”

He ran to her room and came back with the teddy bear.

“I think she’s fine,” Penny told her. “She’s too young to really understand what’s going on. I hope that someday she’ll have forgotten all about this.”

“Maybe we should take her to her pediatrician tomorrow.”

“I already called and left a message. I just want to triple-check.”

“You’re such a good mother.”

“I don’t feel like such a good mother right now.”

“Not your fault.”

“I turned away. I shouldn’t have been talking to that woman. I should’ve had my eyes on Belle.”

“You really think that would’ve changed anything? He would’ve snatched her here, at the park, at the bus stop—it wouldn’t have mattered.”

Her chin quivered.

“Come, let’s put her to bed.”

Belle’s eyes were closing and her head was falling forward.

They put her to bed, kissed her, told her how much they loved her, and went back to the living room.

“I feel like I’ve been gutted and then slowly put back together again,” she said, her eyes wet.

“My one and only job in this relationship is to protect you both, and I failed,” Travis muttered, his elbows on his thighs and his head in his palms.

“You think we need someone just to protect us?” she asked.

“We should have stuck to sex. That would’ve been easier.”

“I’m going to pretend you’re just tired and overwhelmed.” She tried to lift his chin, to see those beautiful blue eyes that were filled with self-loathing and anger but also with an enormous capacity to love. “Without you, who knows how long it would’ve taken to find her, Travis. You know that feeling you get when you think that nothing matters except who you’re with right now? Nothing outside this house means anything. Just you, me, and Sarabelle. The world could end tomorrow, and I’d know that all I ever needed was right here, right now. That is what makes this all worth it. Live here in the now with me. This all goes back to how badly your mother treated you, and that’s why you feel you’re not worth being loved. Forgive her so that you can move on. So that you can let us love you.”

“Forgive my mother?” He finally looked up. “Are you crazy? She’s the reason I can’t say all the things I want to say to you.”

“Who gives a crap about the words, Travis? You show me every day how you feel. I don’t need the words.”

“But I do. I don’t want to be afraid of saying them. I can’t forgive her for fucking me up. I can’t give her that satisfaction.”

“Travis, I wish you would have a little faith. God brought us together. Maybe if you hadn’t had that kind of upbringing you wouldn’t have such a kind soul. Forgiving isn’t about the other person. Hell, your mother isn’t even alive anymore. Forgiving is about you. Forgive her so that you can move on. You’ll feel better for it, I promise you.”

He leaned against Penny and held her, letting the words replay in his mind as he dozed off, trying to forget the absolute worst day of his life.