His heart beat is strong and steady. I’m pressed against his chest, his arm wrapped protectively around me as we recover. No wonder people have sex all the time, I think contentedly. I wish I could stay forever, tangled in these sheets with Kane, but of course I can’t. There’s always a slight chance the children would find us. I’m not too worried about my mom, because I can just tell her I ended up staying at Sarah’s or something. We do sleepovers a lot, although these days it’s more to binge watch Netflix than to give each other manicures and makeovers.
“Not yet,” he murmurs, kissing me again.
I want to let him pull me in again, but I shouldn’t. We’ve already done it two more times, and the clock already says 2 a.m. I’m deliciously exhausted, but I don’t care. I feel like I’m flying, like all my dreams have come true. The way Kane touches me, looks at me, like I’m some treasured thing, makes me radiant. You look gorgeous, he whispered, just before his hand slipped between my legs to rub my clit and start us all over again. Make sure I knew that I belonged to him now. He’s touched every single bit of me.
“I’ll be back tomorrow,” I whisper softly. “Tomorrow night we can put the girls to bed a little early.”
He brushes a lock of hair from my face and kisses me. We smell like sex, a mix of our smells, and I feel a shiver of desire pass through me all over again.
“Tomorrow then,” he says, like a promise.
I slowly disentangle myself, put on my clothes, and head out. At the door I pause and turn around, head tilted as I drink in the sight of Kane Morrison. He’s got his arms behind his head, a grin on his face as he watches me watch him. His sculpted body is perfection, hard, lean muscle all the way down to his fabulous cock. Even soft, he’s at least seven inches. I bite my lip just thinking of what he’s done with it.
“If you keep looking you won’t be able to go,” he says in a low voice.
“You’re right,” I say, finally tearing my eyes away to look back up to his smiling eyes. “Tomorrow.”
And then I quickly close the door behind me. I sag against it. That took all my willpower, but I refuse to be one of those women who don’t know when to leave after casual sex. Jen made that mistake once, and it was pretty humiliating. She got woken up at 5 a.m., her stuff shoved into her hands, and practically pushed out the door. I never want to have that happen to me. Not that I think Kane would ever be that kind of guy. But I know that I don’t truly have a spot in his life, or at least not as anything more than the help. He told me clearly that he wasn’t looking for anything more, that the girls were his focus right now. And I completely respect that. How can you not love a man who is going to be there for his darling little girls? Even I love them, and I’ve only been watching them for a few days.
I almost dance down the stairs and out the door, locking it behind me securely.
I don’t remember the drive back home, I’m just reliving all of our moments together. I’ve had boyfriends of course, I’ve been kissed, and even though I’ve never gone all the way, I know what sex is like. But that’s nothing in comparison to actually doing it. It feels amazing and incredible, like fireworks going off inside of me. I’m already craving the feeling again, the need to have Kane’s huge dick inside of me, pulsing and filling me and making me whole. My pussy clenches, empty, needy. I want him again, I realize with a shock. How could such a change come over me so quickly? It’s almost worrying.
“Hi honey,” my dad calls from the living room as I come back home.
He’s reading the newspaper, because he’s old like that. We got him an iPad last year so he could read the news on it, but he complains that it strains his eyes or something.
“Hi dad,” I say, leaning against the living room’s arched entry.
“You look happy about something,” he notes. He peers over his glasses. “Did you go shopping again?”
“No, I was working!”
I quickly wipe the giant smile off of my face.
“Hm. Well you nice. How is the job coming along anyways?”
“It’s really good. The two girls are really sweet. The older one tries her best to take care of her sister, who’s an angel. She doesn’t like her dad much, but I think that’s because she’s lonely. It doesn’t sound like she has many friends.”
I shift my purse higher up onto my shoulder, and just as I move, I can feel some of Kane’s cum seep out of folds. I suddenly stand up straight, cheeks burning. Oh god, can my dad see?
“Gotta go,” I say abruptly, spinning around. “Forgot I was going to call Jen.”
My dad lifts up his newspaper to cover his face, thank god, and I race up the stairs to my own bedroom. I can feel the wetness against my pussy, and as soon as I slam the door behind me, I kick off my shoes and unbutton my jeans before shoving it all off of me. I’m covered in bruises and bite marks, and I can see where he’s nipped me along my inner thigh. A little souvenir to remind me that it wasn’t just a dream. I pull up my panties, and there’s the telltale smear of cream against the plain black cotton, proof of what we did. I hesitate, then let my tongue dart out to take a taste. It’s salty brine, and earthy and masculine. It’s him. There’s no other way to describe it.
Suddenly, my heart seizes.
He came inside of me. More than once.
I can’t believe we forgot to use protection. We hadn’t thought about it at all, either of us, despite the fact that we both were smart enough to know what could come of it. I try to count back, to remember just when my cycle was. We’re probably in the clear, but just to be safe, we definitely shouldn’t do it again. That’s the last thing I need, to become a baby mama when I don’t even have a real job or prospects. Kane would do the right thing, since he cares so much about family, but I wouldn’t want to force anyone into that kind of situation. That’s not how true love comes about.
Once I’m dressed again in clean clothes, I flop onto my bed and pull my laptop towards me so I could do some Googling. I mean, I hardly know this man. Well, I know what kind of person he is, but not really a lot about who. I type in his name, and not surprisingly, the first link is to Adrenaline Adventures. The about page tells all about why and how he founded the company. Just as I thought, he was an outdoorsy kind of person. It seems too that he’s very charitable, and his organization gives back to a lot of environmental groups, which makes sense, since his tours are based almost entirely on being out in the wilderness. Still, I’m impressed.
My curiosity gets the better of me when I see a short mention about his ex-wife Andrea Morrison. I’ve vaguely heard the name before. I think she had a T.V. show? I type her name into Google, and just as I thought, there’s a T.V. show based on her book which has just come out. Sarah’s been telling me all about it. Seven kingdoms are at war with each other, with dragons and faeries and all kinds of magic. I’m not really a fantasy kind of a person (I sort of slept through Lord of the Rings when Sarah made me go watch it with her. To be fair, her mom did too). Apparently she’s very famous, and judging by her books, very successful too. In fact, they’ve already been translated into over twenty languages. I glance back up at the picture of her. Beautiful blonde hair, rail thin body, with an aristocratic face that has a cold beauty to it. She looks almost like a snow queen.
Wow. We’re like night and day.
The tiny, tiny bit of me that hopes maybe there could be something more between Kane and I shrivels up completely. His ex-wife was beautiful, successful, and thin. If that’s his type, then I’m never going to stand a chance. I don’t even have a clue what I’m going to do, much less do it with the type of success that Andrea Morrison has found. The only thing I know so far is that I love children, and honestly, would love to be a mother. Some ambition that is. My mom would probably shriek if she knew. It’s not that I don’t appreciate all the things that women can do now, I do. It’s just that well, I don’t want to do them. What I love to do, what I know I’m good at, is being with kids. But I’d have to actually be married to have one, or at least, be in love with someone. I’m not so baby obsessed that I don’t know it’d be incredibly hard on my own. So I guess for now having Amelia and Amanda to look after is a pretty good compromise.
I roll over on my bed, arms outstretched as I stare at the canopy over my bed. I begged for this princess bed when I was ten, and it’s still here. Suddenly, it seems very juvenile to me, like I haven’t grown up at all. I’m just a casual fling for him. Something to satisfy his lust, but that has to be kept secret from his children because there is no future ahead for us. Just like he said. He was good enough to make things clear to me ahead of time. He left it up to me to decide. Do I take the situation for what it is, or do I refuse?
The trouble is, I’m not sure I could refuse even if I wanted. Desire coils in my belly, and I let my hand drift downwards. I want him again. And again, and again.