Have you read Without You (#3, Letting Go Series)?
Here is a bonus excerpt…
CHAPTER 1
“THEY’LL MAKE FUN of me.”
Kiernan Everhart looked across the seat at her son, Cullen, who was adjusting his thick glasses. “Not a way to stay positive, buddy,” she reminded him.
He shrugged his shoulder. “If I was in their shoes I would make fun of me too.”
She sighed and gripped the steering wheel. “No, you wouldn’t. You’re a kind, compassionate, caring ten-year-old.”
“Mom, you have too much confidence in me.” He brought his foot up to tie his Nike shoe.
Knowing her son was exceptionally bright and mature, she sometimes tried to slow things down for him. “I understand moving to a new school is difficult, but you’ll make friends. I went to this same school when I was in fifth grade.”
“Back when you had to walk twenty miles through the snow while being chased by dinosaurs?”
“Hey, you! I’m not that old and I never said those things. It was your grandpa who wanted to convince you that he walked with dinosaurs.”
“I’m kidding, mom. It’s not possible for either one of you to have seen a dinosaur. They went extinct 65.5 million years ago, yet technically they’re still alive considering scientists believe birds can be classified as dinosaurs.”
“And just think…it was only a few years ago that you played with dinosaurs and now you’re learning about them.”
“Actually I never enjoyed playing with the rubber toys with moveable parts, but it made you happy.”
“Do you pretend doing other things to make me happy?”
“Yes.”
“Great. Keep it up.” She smiled.
Pulling into the school parking lot, she followed the orange cones to the drop off point. “Are you sure you don’t want me to walk in with you?”
“Positive. It’ll be bad enough when they stare because I look like I do, but why make it worse by having my mom walk me to the door like I’m still a kid.”
“You are still a kid,” she reminded him. He was growing up way too fast. “One day you’ll look back and wish you were young again.”
“No, mom. That’s you. I’ll be glad. Being a kid is hard.”
“Yeah, it’s so hard to eat as much chocolate and bacon as you want without your thighs paying the price. No bills. Turning your brain to mush via video games. Adulting is so much fun!”
He unhooked his seatbelt and scooted to the edge of the seat, peering out the window as they drew closer to the front door. He worked his bottom lip and Kiernan’s heart thumped hard against her ribcage. She suddenly began doubting that she’d made the right decision in coming back home. She thought she would be sick and tears stung the backs of her eyes, but she had to be brave and hold it together for her son, although a part of her wanted to jam her foot into the gas pedal, drive through the cones and speed off away from the elementary school. Protecting her son would be easier at home, but according to the doctor, Cullen needed socialization, even if his maturity and intellectual levels were that of a young adult.
And he had EDS. A connective tissue disorder.
When they learned Cullen had a form of Ehlers-Danlos Syndrome all the pieces of his prior illnesses fit together like a puzzle. His vision was bad, his skin extremely elastic, unexplainable skin rashes, early-onset of arthritis, and he had decelerated growth. He also bruised easily and had a weak immune system which meant he was sick and endured much more pain than other kids his age.
The first few years of school, the kids had accepted Cullen until they started seeing him as different—or maybe he saw himself as different. It was then that things flip-flopped, and he began losing all his friends. Playing contact sports was out of the question because of his lax joints and arthritis so while other kids went off to play, he watched. He began sitting alone at lunch and, more and more, started disappearing inside of a book all too often.
Kiernan had to believe the move from Los Angeles back to her hometown of Kerrville, Texas would be a prosperous one for her and her son. Although she didn’t have much choice but for things to work. After her clothing boutique went under and she filed bankruptcy, the only option left on the table was to move home to be with her dad and twin brother, Kelan. She’d never been one to give up easily, but this time all the cards were stacked against her.
“Here we are,” she said dolefully.
“Don’t worry, mom.” Cullen’s pensive look made her feel a sense of guilt. “Just like you’ve told me, I was born with elastic skin so insults would bounce off me.” He smiled, but it didn’t quite reach his deep-blue eyes, the only part of him that reminded her of his father who had disappeared at the same time she informed him she was pregnant.
“If you need me—”
“I know. I can go to the office and tell them I’m not feeling well.”
“Or if—”
“Someone picks on me, I should tell a teacher. Mom, we’ve been through this.”
“I’m only checking to make sure you remember.” A car honking behind them made Kiernan sigh. “Patience, jerk.” She spotted the red truck and resisted the urge to flip off the impatient driver. Hand gestures were more noticeable here in the small town and she wanted to be a good role model for her son, so she behaved herself.
“I better go.”
She wanted to kiss him on the cheek, but she guessed he was too old for such displays of affection.
From her position in the car, as he’d requested, she watched him step onto the sidewalk and head toward the entrance of the brick building. She stayed, ignoring another honk, and watched until he disappeared among the throng of kids. It wasn’t until the truck rudely held down on their horn that she reluctantly pulled away from the school and turned back onto the main road. The red truck sped up and passed her, spraying her windshield with dirty water from the heavy rain they had last night.
“Shit!” She switched on her wipers and caught a glimpse of a white hat and a decal in the truck’s back window that read, ‘Texas. Everything’s Bigger’. She groaned. “But not his brain or his di—” she snapped off the last word when she slammed on her brakes to keep from hitting a cat that darted across the street. Good thing she didn’t believe in the superstition that black cats crossing one’s path brought bad luck. She’d already had enough to last a lifetime.
But she’d sworn herself to positive thoughts.
And not losing it over men who compensated for inferior body parts with big vehicles and over-inflated attitudes.
Planting a smile on her face, she drove through town and admired her surroundings. Although she’d gotten quite used to bumper-to-bumper traffic, parking garages and towering buildings, she found the quiet, charming environment of Kerrville to be a welcome change. She could practically smell opportunity in the air and, although she wasn’t sure what she’d do with her future, the idea of finding another storefront to open a business seemed feasible on down the road. For now, she’d agreed to help her father with the daily duties at the family ranch, Double K. She loved horses and enjoyed working with them again. Leaving the ranch had definitely been the hardest decision she’d ever made. Maybe she wouldn’t have to choose between her independence and living at home again.
Reaching the ranch, she pulled onto the property and followed the lane to the two-story house with wide pillars, wraparound porch, and the pristine landscape. Although her mother, Elaine, had been gone for years, her father, Joseph, kept the place looking the same. She had loved flowers and always had fresh, colorful arrangements sitting around the house.
Parking next to her dad’s old beat-up blue truck that he’d owned for as long she could remember, she grabbed her purse and headed up the wide steps to the porch, swiping a hand over the horseshoe hanging on a hook for good luck, a tradition all the Everhart’s followed religiously. Kiernan wasn’t sure if it held any weight, but it couldn’t hurt. She gave an extra wish and walked through the door into the foyer, dropped her purse and keys on the table, and inhaled the savory aroma of one of Mila’s fine breakfasts. Following the scent into the kitchen, she found the sixty-something, silver-haired woman standing at the stove whipping up one of her famous concoctions in an iron-skillet.
“I sure hope that’s all for me.”
Mila swiveled and her eyes widened. “Oh, my heavens. There she is. Look at you, young lady.” She dropped the whisk onto the counter and hurried to Kiernan, dragging her in for a tight hug against ample bosom. Mila smelled like maple syrup and the tea tree oil she used for her arthritis. Kiernan gave the voluptuous woman a long squeeze of appreciation. She’d been a housekeeper for the Everhart family for so long she had become more like family. After Elaine Everhart passed away, Mila had taken Kiernan under her wing.
Pulling back, Kiernan blinked away moisture. “I can’t believe you’re still coming here.”
“I don’t come as often, just twice a week now. These old bones don’t move like they once did and since your daddy’s been spending more time at Jolee’s, there’s not much to do around here.”
“Jolee Davis?”
Mila looked over her shoulder to make sure they were still alone. “Yesiree. You know her. The one who buried her oil tycoon husband several years back. I ain’t one to spread rumors, but I hear she’s on the prowl.”
“Well, well…Pops sure can keep his secrets.” Kiernan shook her head.
“Nothing’s changed, baby.” Mila winked.
“I’ve missed you.” Kiernan went in for another hug.
Mila stepped back and subtly swiped at her eyes. “If I’d known you were coming, I would’ve been here sooner. Why didn’t your daddy tell me? That old goat.” Her mouth twisted and gave her head a disapproving shake. “You know how some men are. Getting information is like pulling teeth.”
“We just arrived a few days ago. Settling in has been a whirlwind. I just dropped Cullen off at school for his first day.” She wasn’t sure if the emotional stagger in her voice was noticeable.
“Lordy, it seems like only yesterday you with your pigtails and spiffy-white shoes were heading off on your first day. My-oh-my, I’m getting old.”
“Aren’t we all,” Kiernan muttered.
“Honey, you ain’t seen nothing yet.” Mila laughed, but it fizzled. “What’s wrong, child? You been sucking on lemons?”
“The change…coming here…it’s a lot. I want this to be a good move for Cullen.”
The woman’s aged eyes filled with sincerity. “It’ll be okay, baby girl. Let me spoon up some biscuits and gravy for you and you can tell me all about it. Catch me up on what’s happening with that little man. Okay?”
Nodding, Kiernan took a seat at the pockmarked wooden table where she and her family had shared many memories over dinners. “Where’s Pops? He didn’t sleepover at Jolee’s did he?”
“He hasn’t made it down yet. This’ll give us some time to have girl-talk.” She scooped up a big bowl of gravy and placed it in front of Kiernan. Her mouth watered and she couldn’t wait to dig in, but her anticipation grew when she spotted the plate of cheese quesadillas sitting in the center of the table. Mila was the only one Kiernan knew who made the cheesy delights for every meal, even breakfast. Grabbing an ooey-gooey quesadilla, she bit into the scrumptious creation and savored the fresh melted cheese and homemade tortilla cooked to a golden crisp. Swallowing with a sip of coffee, she sighed. “My stomach missed your cooking, but my thighs haven’t.”
Mila chuckled and pulled out a chair to sit, wiping her hands on her apron. “Plenty of work here on the land to keep the fat from sticking. I know, out there in California y’all worry about that stuff.”
Kiernan wanted to argue, but she couldn’t remember one time in the last decade when she wasn’t concerned about eating healthy. Disregarding the calories, she cut a large biscuit in half and spooned the sausage gravy over it. “I’ve heard we’ve lost a few hands.”
“They’ve retired. But no shop-talk. Save that for the Everhart boys to discuss. Tell me about Cullen. How’s he doing?”
“I know sending him to school is the right thing to do, but the benefits haven’t quite reached those parts of me that are all worried mom.”
“Ah, dear, he’ll be fine.” She patted Kiernan’s hand. “He has the Everhart blood in his veins. I haven’t known one of you to ever shy away from a challenge.”
“Do you know something that bothers me, Mila? This town doesn’t have a pediatrician. It’s frustrating that the nearest one is over an hour away.”
“No, but we do have a nurse practitioner here in Kerrville and he’s pretty darn handsome.” Mila’s cheeks flushed. “He’s the best, if I do say so myself.”
“Who is it?”
“Mason Sullivan. You remember him, don’t you?”
No way could she forget the cute cowboy who had a sexy smile bracketed by the deepest dimples this side of Texas. Although she’d always been curious what was underneath his Wranglers, they never made it far enough behind the barn one summer long ago. “Mason? He’s a nurse? I’m not shocked that he wound up in the medical field.” She remembered a few games of doctor they’d played, and he’d been pretty darn good with ‘healing’.
“He still lives on Sully. But his brother, Mac, moved when he married Nann Fraley and they built a house on the land. They have a son and baby girl. I keep wondering why Mason hasn’t settled down too, but I guess when the right woman happens along...”
“Life doesn’t always turn out as we plan. I often wonder what would have happened if I’d stayed in Kerrville, but I can’t live on what-ifs. I wanted my independence and I certainly got it.”
“You’re right, sweet girl.” Mila stood and went back to the stove, moving slower than Kiernan remembered from the last time she saw her at Christmas a few years back.
“Will you sit down and enjoy breakfast with us?”
Mila chuckled and waved a hand. “I like my place right here at the stove. Filling you and your kin’s bellies is my enjoyment.”
Scooping up a forkful of the biscuit smothered in gravy, Kiernan enjoyed it before saying, “I’m sure it’ll take some time to get used to things—”
The screen door squeaked as it came open, closely followed by heavy boot steps. She twisted in her chair and her mouth fell open. Kalen dragged off his Stetson, showing off a head full of strawberry blonde curls, and placed it against his chest. “I hope you saved me some of that grubb, Mila,” he said as he planted a loud kiss on the woman’s cheek before turning to Kiernan. “Been a long time, sis. This must be an early Thanksgiving dinner.”
Kiernan stood and crossed the planked floor to her brother. “It’s about time you made it home.”
He swept her up for a bear hug, swinging her around like he did when they were kids. When he set her back down on her feet, he was smiling ear to ear and she was giggling. Although they were twins, and shared many similar physical characteristics, Kiernan had taken after their dad who was stubborn as a mule and never took no for an answer. Kelan was gentle like their mother and loved to make people laugh. As kids, when Kiernan would get into trouble, he’d tell jokes just to make her smile. They both had blue eyes and a splattering of freckles, which their mom had called the Irish gene.
“Where’s that nephew of mine?” Kelan hooked his hat on the coat rack.
“His first day of school.”
“He could’ve waited until tomorrow. The little guy needs some ranch time. If he’s going to be a rancher, he needs to learn the ropes.”
“All in good time.”
“I thought I heard a ruckus down here,” the thick, Texan twang interrupted.
Kiernan and Kelan both spun to see their father standing in the doorway. At six-foot four and shoulders that filled the frame of the doorway, he looked about as mean as a villain from an old western. Anyone who knew Joseph Everhart realized he could shoot a rabbit’s ear off from two-hundred yards and spit fire on an enemy if pushed, but he was equally known for his kind heart.
“Hi, Pops. Do you realize what time it is? You weren’t out gallivanting around last night, were you?” Kiernan teased, borrowing the words he’d used when he would catch her sneaking in after curfew.
“If that’s what you like to call a late night with a birthing cow.” He took a seat at the head of the table and stretched out his red suspenders. She couldn’t remember ever seeing him without them. “How are the new horses?” he directed the question at Kelan.
He dropped into a chair as Mila placed a plate in front of him, stacked full of steaming biscuits and gravy. He dug in, chewed and swiped the back of his hand across his mouth, finally answering, “They’re tucked nice and tight in the stables. I’m telling you, deciding to breed Appaloosas was the best idea. We’ll be back on our feet in no time at all.”
Kiernan sat back down. “What do you mean? Are we off our feet?”
“Just a few downfalls that set us back over the past year. Nothing to worry about.” Joseph waved a hand as if he could brush off her concern. “We’ve been there before, and we’ll get through it again.”
She could see the worry lines and dark circles around his eyes. He looked older compared to the last time she’d seen him. She glanced over at her brother who had his head down, focused on inhaling his food. She sensed there was more to the story, but she’d get to the bottom of things soon enough. Kelan never could keep a secret. “I plan on taking over horse duty full-time. Those stalls won’t get mucked on their own.” She went back to eating, but her food was cold.
“Wow, sis. You’re wasting no time in getting your hands dirty.” Kelan laughed.
Joseph smiled, clasping his hands in a prayer-like position. “It’s about time I have both my kids back here on the ranch. And my grandboy. He’ll make a find rancher one day.”
“Don’t get too excited. This is only temporary until I figure out what I’m going to do,” Kiernan reminded them. It was best she didn’t make promises of a long-term commitment.
“You must think of that boy. He needs to be here, breathing fresh air. Working with the horses, just like you did when you were a youngin’. He needs his family,” Joseph said. “Wouldn’t hurt you any either. You’re as thin as a toothpick and as white as a ghost. I thought Cali was known for the sunshine?”
“Pops, it’s not nice to comment on a woman’s weight.”
“Only if she ain’t your daughter.” He lifted his cup and looked at her over the rim. “As your father it’s my job to worry about you until you get married.”
“You don’t have to worry about me.” She started to reach for another quesadilla, but remembered her poor thighs that would pay for the indiscretion.
“Is that so? It appears I should be.”
“Looks like old times around here.” Kelan snorted.
Kiernan hoped that some things had changed, like how her father thought she couldn’t take care of herself.