- Ella -
he months leading up to Christmas went ridiculously fast, and I underestimated how intense orchestrating the details of the party was going to be. My schedule was dominated by work. I slept only when I had time and ate only when I remembered to do it.
I didn’t let my outside reflect the exhausted mess I was on the inside, though. After the compliments Will had given me when we had dinner at Capulets, I made it my business to look good, and found it fun trying to catch his eye. Not that the compliments continued. He was friendly of course, but he didn’t go out of his way to linger around my desk. Plus, he had to travel a lot to the other branches to make sure they were on track leading up to the holidays. So I didn’t see him nearly as much as I would’ve liked.
The Monday after we had dinner, he brought me a pumpkin cappuccino and told me to give it to Emily and set up a time to tell her about my ideas for the party. Then he basically left me alone to get on with it. I didn’t know if I’d offended him. I didn’t know if when he asked if he could bring me home if he’d meant what I thought he meant. God knows I’d gone home with men after far less enchanting dates. Or evenings, I guess. It wasn’t really a date per se. More like an appointment, the most fun appointment I’d ever had.
Still, while I didn’t see him much in the weeks leading up to the party, when I did, he still looked at me that way. Like I was a piece of art. Like I was something collectible. Truthfully, I felt a little ashamed of how much I enjoyed him looking at me like that. Especially because I knew it wasn’t appropriate. Nor was it appropriate that I had full on fantasies about him when my mind wandered. But I knew they weren’t real. I knew they were just as ludicrous as the fantasies I had about Channing Tatum for a year after I went to see Magic Mike with Jackie.
Will and I couldn’t really be together. I just had a silly crush. Which was harmless as long as I didn’t let it affect my job. So as much as I wanted to drop everything and imagine Will’s big hands on my body, I couldn’t stop executing the Christmas Party Plans.
And even though he seemed to find me attractive- he’d said as much anyway- that didn’t mean anything. I knew how charming he was with everyone else, and it would be foolish to think that there was something more going on between us. After all, that was the secret to his success. He made people feel special, indispensable, and important. That was why everyone he worked with was enamored with him. And just because I was too didn’t mean it was okay to get carried away by the way he looked, the way he moved, and the way he smelled. It was a good, clean man smell. It was so pleasant it was weeks before I let myself wonder how he smelled when he was sweaty.
I wish the thought had never entered my brain in the first place, but I couldn’t help it. One day a few weeks ago, he walked in the office to pick something up from Emily, and it was the first time I’d ever seen him without a suit on. He was in a sweaty t-shirt and sweat pants with a little white towel around his neck. My eyes didn’t even know where to look. I swear it was the first time I understood why anyone would ever whistle at another human being.
The worst thing was that when he made eye contact with me, I wasn’t smiling politely like I normally tried to do. I was staring at him like a creepy stalker. To my credit, I wasn’t drooling, but it seemed like it should definitely be against the rules for him to come in like that. Surely other people’s productivity was similarly disrupted. I spent the next hour wondering what he was like when his heart was racing and holding my cold water bottle on the back of my neck.
But somehow, against all odds and the fact that my boss was walking porn, I’d managed to pull everything together in time for the Christmas Party. Now it was just a question of whether I could pull it off on the night. Which I had to do if I was going to earn my money back for all of Emily’s damn lattes. Not that they weren’t worth it. On the contrary, she saw through the whole charade for a good three weeks, but eventually she seemed increasingly happy to see me. Then one day I complimented a brooch she was wearing that her late husband bought her at some fancy market in Paris, and she gushed about their honeymoon there for a good ten minutes. Which in Emily time was like two and a half hours. After that, she was much more tolerant of me.
“Do you think it would be inappropriate to get Emily a Christmas Present?” I asked Jackie across the rack at Macy’s.
“How should I know?” She kept her eyes on the dresses in front of her. “Would she think you were sucking up or would she appreciate it?”
“Probably both.”
“Let’s worry about your dress first. She’s number two on the list of people I want you to impress on the night.”
I rolled my eyes. “Thanks for coming all the way out to help me pick something.”
“Wouldn’t miss it. This is your big society debut. What you wear is half the battle.”
“If you say so.”
“I do say so.”
I smiled. “What about this one?” I held up a dark green dress.
She crinkled her face. “That would be perfect if you were going as a Christmas Tree.”
“I think it’s pretty.”
“The green isn’t right.”
“I didn’t know we had a color concept in mind already.”
“We do. And it isn’t green.”
“What are you thinking then?”
“Something more like this.” She held out a floor length red dress. When she twirled it, I could see that it had a plunging neckline.
“I’m supposed to be behind the scenes, Jackie. Not Cameron Diaz in the Mask.”
“First of all, she looked amazing in that movie. Second of all, you are not supposed to be behind the scenes. It would be a shame for you to look less amazing than the party itself.”
“The plunging neckline is a bit much, though, don’t you think? For a work thing?”
“You could at least try it on.”
“How much is it?”
She found the tag and inhaled sharply through her teeth.
“I only have what’s left on the gift card, remember? Plus, I want to get something for Emily.”
“I know, but the sugar plum fairies are going to be stiff competition.”
“True.”
“And this isn’t just a party. It’s also an interview. I mean, isn’t the goal to look so good Will can’t imagine attending another party without you for the next few years?”
“Sort of.”
“And if you secure that job, you won’t have to worry about money again for a long time, right?”
“I suppose.”
“So this dress isn’t really a purchase.” She tilted her head. “It’s more like an investment.”
“I get what you’re saying. Really I do. But the plunging neckline is still too sexy.” I held the dress up in front of me. “I can’t do my job when I’m on the constant verge of a wardrobe malfunction.”
She bit her lip and scanned the rack. “Ah ha!” She grabbed another red dress off the rack. “How about this one?”
“That’s the same dress, dummy.”
“No it’s not. This one has a plunging backline.” She twirled the hanger. “See?”
“I don’t know. I’ve never worn a backless dress.”
“Instead of in your face sexy like that one-” She nodded towards the dress I was holding. “It’s understated sexy. Which is exactly what you’re going for.”
“I don’t know.”
“What don’t you know?! It’s perfect. Business in the front, party in the back.”
I laughed. “Oh brilliant. Just what I wanted. A dress that makes people think about mullets.”
“Trust me. No one is going to be able to think about anything when they see you in this dress.”
I looked at the striking red dress in front of her. I did want to look pretty, and even though the plunging back was very revealing, the front was conservative. There was a chance it would be the perfect way to hold my own in a room full of sugar plum fairies.
I sighed and looked at Jackie’s hopeful face. “I guess there’s no harm in trying it on.”