- Will -
I could never take my eyes off a woman putting panty hose on. I think it had something to do with the way they had to drag their fingers up their leg at the exact speed I liked to drag my tongue across their body.
I propped myself up on the pillows. “You’re sure you don’t want to cuddle?”
“Cuddling is for married people,” Laura said, working her hosiery over her toned ass. “And we aren’t married anymore.”
“You don’t have to tell me.” I folded my hands behind my head. “Your lips on my dick was enough of a reminder of that.”
She looked at me out of the corner of her eye. “Inappropriate.”
I laughed. “Yes it was, and I loved every minute of it.”
She stood at the end of the bed and began buttoning her white collared shirt. “I just needed to blow off some steam.”
“By blowing me off?” I could feel my body getting excited all over again. “I’m so glad I could help.”
“Don’t be an ass.” She flipped her blond hair over her shoulders. “You relieved some pressure for me, too.”
“What can I say? I’m a nice guy.” I patted the bed next to me. “You still seem stressed, though. You’re sure you don’t want to unload some more?”
She put her manicured fingertips on the comforter. “Actually, I am having problems with the people who are supposed to do the hallway sconces-“
“I meant on my cock.”
She sighed. “Are you really ready to go again?”
I smiled. “Don’t act surprised. You’ll hurt my feelings.”
“I’m not surprised. I just don’t know where you find the energy.”
“I didn’t work out this morning.”
“Oh well that explains it, but you really shouldn’t skip workouts. It makes you all ragey and intense.”
I shrugged. “I worked you out at least.”
“Yes you did.”
“Just so we’re clear, it’s no cuddling- just sex- and only when you feel like it?”
“Yes,” she said, pushing the links from what looked like a new Cartier watch into place.
“So is this just about screwing me as much as possible?”
She rolled her eyes. “Oh please. Don’t act like you even miss the money.”
“I don’t.”
“Good. Cause I work my ass off for you.”
“I know.”
“And it’s only fair that the divorce is on my terms.”
“How do you figure?”
“Because our marriage was always on yours.”
“If you say so.”
“I do.” She walked up to the head of the bed. “Besides, don’t you think our relationship works so much better this way? We both get what we want, and we don’t have to fake wanting more from each other.”
“I suppose.”
She pointed at her skirt on the far side of the bed.
I reached over and grabbed it for her.
“Thanks.” She stepped into it, pulled it up, and began tucking in her shirt. “Don’t pout. It doesn’t suit you.”
“I’m not pouting.”
“You were doing your angry gorilla face.”
“I was just wondering-”
“What?”
“Why we didn’t work out.”
“Because I always came second.”
“That’s not true.”
“Yes it is.”
“No. It’s not,” I said, rolling onto my side. “You came first sometimes.”
“I didn’t.”
“How can you say that? You came first ten minutes ago.”
She smiled. “Yes I did.”
I knew I didn’t love her anymore, but I still loved it when she smiled.
“You fell out of love with me,” she said. “And the sex was great- is still great- but-”
“But what?”
“You’re emotionally unavailab-”
“Don’t start with that crap. Just because that psycho said that one time yo-”
“Psychologist.”
“Whatever.”
“Not whatever, Will.”
I sighed.
“If there’s anything I learned from spending time with you it’s that it’s okay to want it all.”
“You just didn’t want it all with me?”
She pursed her lips. “I was an accessory for you. Not a wife.”
“That’s a bit harsh, isn’t it?”
She shrugged. “We don’t want the same things.”
“You don’t think I want love?”
“No. I don’t think you even know what love is.”
“That’s not fair.”
She nodded. “You’re right. I do think it’s the reason you’re so successful in business, though.”
I ran my fingers through my hair.
“And I think it’s the reason you’ll achieve your goal of owning the best luxury hotel chain on Earth.”
“Because I’m incapable of love?”
“Don’t get upset.”
“I’m not upset. I just want to understand.”
“Maybe you just haven’t met the right girl.”
“Maybe I did and she fucked the pool boy?”
She folded her arms. “I don’t appreciate that.”
“I didn’t either.”
“Are you ever going to stop throwing that in my face? I was in a bad place!”
“No shit. I wouldn’t have wanted to be in the pool boy’s pants either.”
“You sent me to Dubai for six months!”
“To do your job. Not the pool boy.”
“You promised me you wouldn’t bring that up anymore.”
“Oops. You promised to be faithful.”
She sighed. “I will always be sorry for how you found out about that blip.”
I shook my head. “That blip. You’re unbelievable.”
“So are you, honey.” She leaned forward and kissed me on the forehead. “That’s why we make such a great team.”
“What are you wearing to the launch party?”
“I can’t go.”
“What are you talking about?” I sat up. “You have to be there.”
“My Dad’s taken a turn for the worse.”
“Is he all right?”
“At the moment he is, but I have to go to Florida this weekend. Just in case.”
“I’m sorry. You should’ve told me. You could’ve gone down for the week.” And not missed the fucking party.
“You don’t mean that,” she said, slipping her feet into her heels. “Plus, you wouldn’t have had a hotel to celebrate if I didn’t work this week. Not one with lighting anyway.”
“Give your parents my best.
She nodded.
“And if they need anything just-”
“Thanks. I will.”
I closed my eyes and listened as she walked down the stairs and let herself out. Was she right? Was I incapable of love? I didn’t think so. After all, I loved my job and every one of my hotels. I loved working out. I loved sex. I loved eating in fine restaurants and traveling and jazz. And I loved women. Generally, though. Not specifically.
But Laura was right. I didn’t love her. I don’t know if I ever did. Even before she fucked that Arab pool boy. Pathetic.
I loved that she was smart. I loved her long legs and the fact that she was absolutely cut throat at her job. But as a person I didn’t love her any more than I loved calamari. I wouldn’t give calamari up for her or anything.
Was that love? Compromise? That’s what that psycho told us. That I had a compromising problem. Even though no one compromised our marriage more than she did with her pills and her pool boy. If I ever did love her, she had beaten my love to death with drama and deceit.
The only reason I still fucked her was because it was so easy for both of us. She was good at it, and I didn’t have time for a relationship. Not that I couldn’t make time if I wanted to. I could do whatever the fuck I wanted whenever I wanted. And I could probably do whoever the fuck I wanted, too.
But I couldn’t remember the last time I met a woman that really excited me. I met gorgeous women all the time in my line of work. Gorgeous rich women and gorgeous working class women. But they were all so predictable, so needy. I could imagine a whole shallow relationship with them in the time it took to jack off to their memory. So I didn’t really see the point in putting in the effort.
Someday when my hotel empire was where I wanted it to be, I would have more time to look for love. More time to compromise. After all, I took care of myself. I still had my looks and my hair. I had plenty of time to meet someone special. And when I did, I would make her mine and that would be that.
But at the moment I had more important things to do.