Chapter Eight
Locus
My alpha was taller than me even now. He’d changed out of his work clothes while I slept, and now wore a fitted navy T-shirt tucked into fitted tan shorts that revealed not only his toned upper body but long tanned legs and bare feet. Every inch of him elegant, trim, and mouth-wateringly sexy.
I was beyond grateful for this amazing alpha who had helped me come back to myself. And I wanted him. Feelings that had been suppressed since before my family was taken surged to the forefront. My recently shifted body wanted him in a way I’d never before experienced. Would he be shocked to learn I’d never...ummm. If I couldn’t even think the words without stammering, how could I act on them?
“Thank you.” Okay so maybe I’d lost a lot of my ability with words since the last time I’d used them. Also, my voice was pretty hoarse after not using it for so long. “I can never repay you for everything you’ve done.”
He grinned, revealing a dimple in his cheek, and I melted, suddenly aware that only one of us was naked. And it was me. “Glad to do it, omega.”
OMG. He called me omega. The last solid bits of me joined the puddle on the floor. “I ah...do you have something I can put on?” To hide my obvious erection I have no business flashing around when you’ve given no indication you want me to do so?
He blinked as if he’d just noticed. Because why should he? Just because I was hot for his form didn’t mean he’d think of me as anything other than a patient, or maybe former now that I’d shifted. Why did he have to be so good looking? I’d been feeling like he was mine, my fox was sure as hell he was, but now that I wasn’t hiding behind a fluffy orange-and-white coat and cute black feet, I doubted myself.
I’d never attracted an alpha before, what made me think this one, someone so obviously high class and certainly successful would want me in his life?
His moan caught me off guard. “What was I thinking? I should have had something prepared for you to wear.” Shifters weren’t usually so conscious of clothes, but the fact he was pretending it was his fault I was neurotic was so sweet I could have kissed him. “I’m a bit bigger than you, but I think I have something...right...here.” He dug through a dresser and pulled out a pair of gray sweat shorts. “Yeah, they have a string so you can tighten the waistband and keep them up.” He added a shirt to the shorts and passed them to me. “Undershorts?”
I shook my head. “No, I”—I cleared my throat. It would be a while before I got used to speaking again —“I never wear them.” Slipping the shirt over my head, I emerged to find him looking at me as if I were a giant chocolate chip cookie. “Thanks again, for everything.”
Felix shrugged. “It’s nothing. Hungry?”
I breathed in the scent again. Furniture polish, some sort of spray cleaner, and dinner. Heaven. “Starved. I hope you didn’t wait for me.”
“I did.” That grin, that dimple...those shoulders! “Come on. I hope you like steak.”
Anything cooked sounded wonderful. “It’s my favorite. Smells great, too.”
He led me out of the bedroom and down the stairs and a short hall. “Let’s eat out on the deck. I’ve kept the meat and veggies warm in the oven. The hallway opened into a comfortable open-plan area, living room on one side, kitchen on the other, sliding glass doors directly in front of us. “I’ll get it if you want to go outside.”
I actually had spent all the time outside I needed to, but if Felix wanted to dine al fresco, I’d do it. “Sure.”
“What kind of dressing for your salad? I have bleu cheese, thousand, a nice vinaigrette I make myself…”
I froze with my hand on the door handle. “Salad dressing! I haven’t had a salad in so long.” I barked out a hoarse chuckle—imagine laughing again. “I’ll take your homemade dressing.” My mouth watered.
“Okay, go take a seat.”
I’d slept quite a while, so the last of daylight had faded and only a single candle lantern lit the deck, but it was made up for by the huge golden moon just rising above the trees. I tried to think what month it was, but I’d been functioning seasonally for a long time and the concepts were a bit different. A slight breeze rattled the leaves of a stand of aspens a short distance away, and the scent of forest loam was sweet in my nose. My fox would always be part of me, but in future would only get part-time appearance because my panicked plan had not been especially smart. I might have been a bit crazed with grief. I wouldn’t ever forget my family, but I’d try to make more rational decisions in the future.
And I had to accept I might never find them. Swallowing the grief that had been always with me, I tried to look to the future and push the pain back. Picturing Dr. Felix helped.
“Here we go.” That panty-soaking—had I been a guy who wore panties or underwear of any kind—voice sent a shiver right into my core, stirring my baby-maker. Settle down. We’re hardly what an alpha wants. Pretty much a mess. I was homeless, I realized. Surely our old home was no longer just standing, waiting for my family to return. “Steak, salad, veggies, and my special foil-packet potatoes.”
My stomach growled, and he chuckled, setting a tray down on the table in front of me.
“I have pie for dessert, too, so save room.”
The extra-loud rumble brought more soft laughter. “Dutch apple.”
“I don’t need to save room. Living in the wild, you eat everything you can get whenever you can get it.” I grabbed for the plate of steak, grilled zucchini and carrots, and buttery slices of potatoes, but he tugged it away.
“That was your fox stomach. Take it slow, okay? You can eat all you want, but if you go too fast, you’re going to make yourself sick.”
“Yes, Doc,” I muttered, knowing he was right and irritated by it. My stomach might have limitations, but my habits said, Eat it all, now! You don’t know when there will be more! But I drew the plate back and picked up my knife and fork. “I get it.”
He ruffled my hair before sitting across the small round table from me. “It’s almost as soft as your fox fur. How do you manage that?”
I frowned, chewing, then shrugged and swallowed. “Isn’t yours?”
Felix paused from cutting into his meat. “I have no idea. Want to test it?”
“Sure.” I rose but he waved me back into my seat.
“After dinner, you can pet me.”
I almost spat out the bite of savory vegetables at the thought of petting him. I wanted to pet every inch of that ripped body, stroke his hair, suck his cock, pull my legs over my head, and urge him to plunge it into me over and over until we were both replete.
I wanted him to put a baby into me.
Ours, my fox insisted.
We aren’t good enough, I replied.
Of course you are. Another voice in my head. Felix’s… We’re meant to be together.
I sank back in my seat, unsure what to do with a man who could hear my deepest insecurities. Aloud, I said, “Can you hear everything I think? I’m not sure I’m comfortable with that.”
“No. You can shut me out if you want.”
“That’s a relief because what goes on in my head is not always suitable for polite company.”
“I’m not company, omega.” His smile spread, lifting his cheeks and making his eyes sparkle. “I’m your alpha, and as soon as you are up to it, I want to show you what that means.”
Oh gods. “I’m done. Let’s get horizontal.” Brave words from a virgin fox omega.
“Eat. We have a lifetime.”
But I’d seen what could happen at the height of joy and togetherness. The reminder of my family took the edge off my elation. “I don’t know if we do. I’m on sort of a quest.”
“Whatever it is,” he said, deep-brown eyes looking into my soul. “Mates quest together. Now, eat your food, and I’ll tuck you into my bed.”
“Will you tuck yourself in with me?”
He pushed his salad around in the little bowl next to his plate. I had one, too, but hadn’t started on it yet. “I’m afraid I can’t get in bed with you and keep my hands to myself.”
Now my smile stretched my cheeks. “Gods I hope you can’t.”