Alec hurried to answer the security pad. A call was coming directly from the front desk in the lobby. Figuring it was grocery delivery, and wondering if his mother mixed up the schedule because their fridge and freezer were stocked, Alec tapped the green answer call button.

“A visitor, Mr. Edwards,” the door guard said. “A Mr. Jeremy Tucker.”

Alec reeled back from the video screen, frowning. His heart drummed harder, his hand reaching up to massage his suddenly tight chest. Upset that he was reacting so ridiculously to JT’s arrival, Alec almost missed security asking permission to send him up.

“Yes,” Alec said quickly, ending the call.

He moved to the kitchen, lest he pace in front of the elevator waiting for it to spew JT out on the penthouse lobby. The lift pinged and the doors swung open. Alec gripped the counter of the island, staring wide-eyed as JT stepped into the lobby.

Their eyes met, and JT strode over to him, eating up the distance, forcing Alec to control the urge to back away, scurry from the larger-than-life alpha. He forgot how big and tall his alpha was, or how hard his features could seem when he wasn’t smiling.

“Alec,” he said as way of greeting.

“What are you doing?” Alec asked, his voice barely an octave above a whisper. He skipped the niceties. They were beyond that now. Alec was swollen with JT’s baby. Touching a hand to the new life inside of him, Alec stepped out of JT’s reach. “Why are you here?”

“Because you’re here.”

So plainly put, Alec flinched as if he’d been slapped. There was nothing but honesty in JT’s deep, rumbling voice. He meant every word. Refusing to melt into a puddle at this big man’s feet, he rallied his courage, and the hurt he’d been nursing for too damn long. “Why should I believe you?”

“You don’t have a reason to,” JT said, nodding slowly, “but it’s the truth: I’m here for you. I needed to see you—”

Alec cut him off with a snort. “You’re nearly two months too late.”

“I know,” was all JT said.

“I don’t want to do this.” Alec wrapped his arms around his middle, hugging himself close, hating that he felt as if a meltdown was near. His eyes burned, and his bottom lip trembled ever-so-slightly. He ducked his head, his wealth of auburn hair falling over his eyes. Glad for the fringe cover, he said, “Not now. I don’t want to talk now.”

Sensing movement in his periphery, Alec looked up and confirmed JT was on the move.

JT stepped around the island, and Alec moved back from him. Other than his eyes narrowing, the alpha held his ground and didn’t give him chase.

Good. Alec didn’t think he could handle that right now. Not rationally at least.

“I missed you,” he said next.

Alec swallowed thickly, frowning. “You have a funny way of showing it.” He hadn’t gotten so much as a text from JT since he left, forget a phone call or voicemail. Hell, Alec wouldn’t have minded an old-fashioned letter at this point. Clearly he’d tracked him to his new home easily enough, meaning he knew the address.

Speaking of tracking…

“How did you find me?” Alec stared at him suspiciously. The intrigue expanded in JT’s lengthy silence.

“I asked your half-brother, Andrew.”

“You spoke to Drew?” Alec didn’t mask his surprise. Like JT disappearing from his life, his half-brothers, Zander and Drew made themselves non-existent after discovering Alec and JT had split. Alec no longer became a challenging threat to the two-hundred million inheritance when he decided it wasn’t worth his peace of mind.

Truth be told, Alec didn’t care about the money as much after JT left him. It had been an awful stress on his life. He hadn’t meant to fall in love with his fake alpha mate, but he had, and he wanted their marriage to be real—feel real. And with a nervous fluttering whipping up inside him, he realized he still wanted that: he needed JT to feel the strong attachment and affection and love he felt for him.

Sliding his foot back to escape, and figuring it was futile so long as JT was somewhere in this spacious penthouse suite, Alec stilled and caught the tail-end of what JT was saying.

“…And he said you moved. Here.” JT rested his big, gloved hand on the counter edge, squeezing it, though he needed the support to hold himself together—or hold him from doing something else.

Alec slid his other foot back. If he kept this up, he’d scurry into the corner. It wouldn’t be the first time JT had cornered him in the kitchen. Alec’s cheeks warmed at the memory of JT holding him fast to the fridge, stopping shy of ravishing his mouth with hard, hot kisses.

“Alec, I did miss you.”

The memory of his mouth moving expertly over Alec disappeared at that growled confession.

JT moved a foot forward, and Alec took two steps back, his arms squeezing his middle tighter.

“I thought about you. I… I made a mistake. A big, fucking mistake, all right? I shouldn’t have…” he trailed off on the thought, his expression stormy. Only it wasn’t his anger lashing out at Alec; it was turned inward. JT was clearly beating himself up about leaving.

And if Alec doubted that, JT said, “If I could go back, I’d change it. I wouldn’t have let you go.” He paused, sucked in a sharp, loud breath, and his voice tumbled into a low growl. “Tell me it’s not too late.”

Alec’s suspicion and irritation thawed a bit.

His hands slipped down to wrap over his belly, taut now with child. He chewed his lips, struggled with the tug-of-war of thoughts in his head. The decision of telling JT, or leaving him in suspense gnawed at him.

The one-way tickets to St. Gallen, Switzerland now purchased meant Alec had no clue when he’d see JT again. So, he blurted, “I’m pregnant.”

JT reeled back as if Alec had slapped him. And he had, in a way, metaphorically dumped the news on him—no warning. Then again, after all the sex they had, and intentionally to get Alec pregnant, he shouldn’t look so shocked…or angry.

Forgetting their boundaries, JT stalked into Alec’s personal bubble and he pushed him against the opposite counter and by the fridge. Suddenly glad that his mother had taken a nap, Alec gasped and peered up at JT, meeting his searing gaze. The anger was very much directed at him now.

“Who is he?” he asked, his voice tight and his words clipped.

Realizing what he meant, Alec’s chest tightened with his own flaring anger. “I’m looking at him.” Annoyed when JT’s brows snapped up, his eyes widening and his jaw relaxing, Alec shoved at his chest, barely getting the alpha to budge an inch. “How could you think I was with anyone else?”

JT gripped Alec’s shoulders and pressed him back against the counter, holding him there with his big, muscled body. “It’s mine?” he said, surprise drawing his features into softer lines.

It made him even more terribly handsome.

He slid a hand down from Alec’s shoulder to cup his stomach, and Alec sucked in his lips, willing the moan creeping up his throat to disappear. JT massaged his stomach now, his gaze dipping to stare down at where he touched Alec, at where he remained closest with the life they’d created together.

Alec quivered, warmth coiling tight in his lower belly, his mouth drying and his heart racing. He struggled half-heartedly, finally stilling and falling back on glowering at the alpha caging him in. Though he wasn’t exactly fighting to free himself now, was he?

“You’re the father, yes,” Alec said, a bit more shakily than he’d like.

JT stroked his stomach, splaying his fingers wide, the first sign of a smile touching his lips. “My kid, huh?”

Alec hated to end the moment, but he gripped JT’s hand and tried to push him off. JT latched on harder and Alec gasped, not so much because he was hurt, because he felt the press of JT’s hard bulge against his side.

When he glanced up, Alec was overtaken by JT’s lowering head, his body immobilized by his anticipation for the kiss.

It was exactly as he’d dreamed it would be. For seven weeks, this right here was all he’d thought about. Moaning into their locked lips, Alec felt the teasing brush of JT’s tongue along his seam and he parted for him, arching into JT’s arms when they snaked around his waist.

Alec groaned into the kiss when JT’s hands cupped his ass and massaged the cheeks, weighing each globe with his kneading, knowledgeable hands. JT kissed him like a man starved, denied his last meal, and now, when he finally had it in his sights, he swallowed it whole.

Moaning in protest when JT ripped their mouths apart, Alec whined when JT touched his lips to his pulse and kissed a hot, slick trail to his collarbone. Down, down, he went, moving to fall to his knees—but the sight of Alec’s mother stepping from the hall acted as a bucket of ice-cold water.

JT noticed the change in mood and he turned, straightening once he realized they had company.

She smiled at JT, nodding. “Welcome back.” Her dry tone said it all. She wasn’t too impressed with JT’s abandonment, and Isolde wasn’t one to hold back with her opinion. “The prodigal son-in-law returns home.”

“He was just leaving,” Alec blurted, avoiding JT’s sharp gaze roving his features. He kept his eyes on his mother. “I’ll see him out.”

With another short nod, Isolde turned and headed deeper into the corridor, and into her bedroom. Soon as her door closed after her, Alec confronted JT’s fiery stare. “I’m not leaving,” he said.

“You have to,” Alec retorted, sighing when he realized he was all out of fight. And though his body prickled with zaps of heat from JT’s lingering caresses and kisses, he said, “We can’t do this.”

“Why not?” JT pushed him back into the corner, and Alec smoothed his hands out over the alpha’s hard chest, a shuddery moan slithering out. JT’s erection pushed against his belly, and he carried the alpha’s baby, and everything should be all rosy now. Only it wasn’t. They had to be realistic. This heat between them, it was only that. It would eventually burn its course and then, they’d truly have nothing to rely on.

Theirs was always a fake relationship. Better they part ways now, before they tricked themselves into believing it was more, and ultimately hurt each other even more than they had the first time.

Because it wasn’t only JT who felt guilt—Alec had a deep, mind-clearing dose of it too. JT had the opportunity to be with someone who could truly make him happy. Worse, they had a child to take care. What kind of parents would they be if they raised that child under the false pretense of love?

Moreover, what kind of parents allowed their child to be near danger?

“What happened to Wren?”

“That’s been solved,” JT said.

Alec frowned. “Has it? Am I supposed to take your word for it?” Give me more, Alec thought simultaneously. He needed JT to trust him.

“No, you’re right.” JT nodded, his voice lowering. “The clubhouse has been helping. Everyone’s pitching in with Wren’s debt.”

Alec pressed a hand to his stomach. “What about the gunman? Am I supposed to look over my shoulder all the time? Because I can’t do that.”

JT shook his head. “I took care of that. The loan shark won’t be around us.” He stared at Alec’s belly. “Or our baby.”

“The loan shark did that?” Alec absorbed the shocking news. Of course. It explained why JT hadn’t told him at first. Alec wouldn’t have wanted to be near any of that. Narrowing his eyes, he had to ask, “Are you still a package deal then?”

“I was never a two-for-one.”

Alec snorted. “Oh, yes, you were. I admire the loyalty, but not when it nearly got us killed.”

“I’m sorry.” JT massaged a hand over his weary face. He heaved a sigh. “I wish I could turn back time. I’d have done things differently. I wouldn’t have been so fucking stupid, Alec. You have to believe me.”

Alec stiffened. He wanted to…he truly did. But JT had battered and bruised his heart too much. Though it still beat wildly for the alpha, Alec didn’t know if he was ready to present it on a platter again.

JT swallowed audibly, his face drawn and reserved. “I know I asked this before, but do you still love me?”

“It’s more complicated than that,” Alec said. He lowered his head, and now he wasn’t staring deep into JT’s dark brown eyes, he could lie boldly, saying, “I don’t love you.”

“Liar,” JT hissed, calling him out on it quickly enough. He trapped Alec’s chin between his thumb and index, and lifted his head up to meet his gaze again.

“Say it again,” he challenged. “Tell me you don’t care for me. That you don’t feel it right here,” he gripped his own chest, right over his heart, with his other hand, “every time you think of me, too. Does it beat faster, Alec? Do I take your breath away? Do I give you the reprieve of air once I’m in the room with you, beside you, holding you—”

Alec swallowed hard, gulping audibly surely. But he forced the tough words out. They cut him like tiny knives. Each syllable razor-sharp and slicing into him. “I don’t feel any of that, because I don’t love you.”

“You can’t mean that.”

“I do,” Alec chewed out the words. The other option was letting JT back into his life, allowing him the chance to hurt him again. He had to worry about their baby now. Needing to hear one last thing, Alec asked, “Why didn’t you tell me Wren needed help? You could have trusted me with that information.”

“I’m sorry I didn’t.” JT massaged his jaw, a nervous gesture. “I should have been up front with you. I know that now.”

“You’re sorry now. What about next time though? What happens when Wren needs you again, and you feel obligated to help him.” Alec frowned. “I won’t force you to choose; I just don’t want to be second. I want you to talk to me.”

“I will,” JT said vehemently. “I’ll tell you whatever you need to know from here on out.”

“Even if it has to do with Wren and I don’t approve?”

JT’s silence spoke volumes. Alec wasn’t assailed by fiery jealousy. Just a deep well of sorrow that JT couldn’t trust him to know what was best for them.

“So. That’s it.” It wasn’t a question. JT dropped his hand from his jaw, frowning. “We’re through.”

Alec didn’t answer.

JT stepped back and after staring long and hard at Alec, he turned and headed for the lift. The ping of the elevator’s arrival was like a death knell to their relationship. Alec watched him go, disappear, the lift doors closing and carrying his heart away with him.

Then he forgot to breathe as he slid to the kitchen floor, his legs drawn to his chest, his body rocking back and forth, in catatonic shock of having just let JT leave believing he didn’t love him.

I love you. I love you. I love you.

Over and over, he chanted the proclamation like a mantra.

Yes, he forgot how to breathe.

And it took even longer to remember how to barely exist without JT.