“We’re going to be late for our flight,” Alec said, his voice bland, monotonous. It had been five days, eighteen hours and some minutes since he broke his heart—since he’d let JT waltz out of his life again, without letting him know how deeply he’d fallen, how hard he’d crashed and splattered all over the ground.

The worst part was the alpha had wanted him.

JT all but said it, painting the picture of breathlessness he endured whenever Alec was around. Also, paradoxically, how they’d become like air for each other. All the things he’d watched in sappy romantic comedies. Yeah, well, they weren’t exactly far off the mark.

Allowing JT to walk out of his life a second time stilled Alec’s heart. Each breath he took had become a battle. And each heartbeat might as well have been his last. If this was what death felt like…well, Alec wanted to go quick.

The only thing that had him stirring from his bed, forcing food and drink down his throat, and keeping up with his prenatal vitamins, was the life inside of him. His one lasting connection to JT.

Feeling his mother’s gaze, and remembering where they were, tucked in the back of the cab and heading in the opposite direction of the JFK. She, too, was staring at his stomach, her eyes flitting up to meet his side glance.

“We’re going to be late,” Alec reiterated. “And the clinic is waiting for us. They expect us to be on time, I imagine.”

She waved him off. “We left early. We still have four hours until our flight.”

“It’s going to be rush hour by the time we finish whatever it is you’re doing.” Alec stared out the window, catching the reflection of his frown. He tried and failed to smooth his trouble features. They were here to stay, like his wilted heart. “What did you want from Central Park?”

“It’s where I met your father,” Isolde said, tsking him. “We had our first date there.”

Alec sat up, intrigued. He hadn’t heard too much about how exactly his parents met. Now that dear old dad was pushing daisies, he realized his mother was the vault to those secrets. And now the vault inched open.

She had a dreamy expression in her eyes. “He was so handsome, and gallant, and such a gentleman. Not like any man I’ve met, even now.” She sighed. “I won’t be here to see it anymore.”

Alec didn’t point out that she hadn’t stirred from the penthouse at all to be wistful about the park. But she seemed determined to pass it, and who was he to discourage the visit? In fact, now that he gave her a good look, and tuned out his own misery, Alec noticed she was dressed differently too.

She wore a red veil today. Bright red. Fire hydrant red. Look-at-me red. It was a bold color that matched her pantsuit. She looked in charge, in control, ready to seize back the image she’d been denied since her husband’s death, and her car accident.

Alec noted his own attire. He’d dressed for the long eight-hour flight to Switzerland: a plain white T-shirt underneath a gray Eagles hoodie, and black jeans with purposeful tears over the knees and upper thighs. He wore pricey ankle boots to finish off his laidback look. He didn’t appear the twenty-one-year-old expectant father; more like a broody teen who was being dragged along on an adventure he had half a mind and heart for.

“Alec, please,” his mother said. “It’ll be quick. I promise.”

Alec indulged a put-upon sigh, and then he muttered, “As long as we’re not late.” He didn’t have money lying around to waste a plane ticket. Also, the quicker he left this half of the world, the easier he hoped this heartache would pass.

Because right now, it wasn’t budging. It was determined to ruin Alec’s life.

The cab drove them to the park, idling when Alec asked for him to wait. He wasn’t too worried about leaving his luggage. He had the driver’s name, ID, and cab number to report in case of theft. The man had an honest face, and he promised to wait.

“This way,” Isolde chirped, completely uncharacteristically.

They wound their way through the park, the winter adding a magic to the air. Alec had only been here once before, to scratch it off his bucket list. He wasn’t any better than Isolde these weeks, staying at home, unless he needed to venture out.

Soaking in fresh air, he sighed heavily, watching the gray wisps of his breath curling from his face. Isolde bounded ahead, keeping upright on her heeled boots. He marveled at how she walked so fiercely when he barely navigated his ground in his flat-soled boots.

“Over this way,” she said.

Pricked by annoyance, and puzzled at why they were strolling aimlessly through the park, Alec snapped, “Okay, I’m done walking now.”

Isolde stopped and regarded him, frowning. “Alec William Edwards, you will do as I say.”

“Which is what exactly?” Alec crossed his arms, confronting her.

She turned her head at a noise that swelled around the bend, and the frown she wore melted off. All smiles now, like she hadn’t been in the middle of reprimanding him, she said, “We’re here. Hurry now.”

Alec followed her, only because she ran off without him.

He saw the trail of red rose petals first, and then he glimpsed a trellis strewn with beautiful, deep red roses, and he frowned. A wedding. Of course, he’d stumbled into one of those at a time like this.

“Seriously,” he muttered.

Just as Alec grumbled about his poor luck and having to stumble upon a wedding when all it did was remind him about how he’d let his alpha go, he froze and gawped at the unmistaken sight of bikers on the snowy lawn.

Seated in the four dozen silver Chiavari chairs, their backs to Alec and Isolde, but their cuts visible, Alec’s legs wobbled on seeing the bird of prey under the arching banner proclaiming them to be The Strix MC. If his mother hadn’t looped her arm through his, he would have dropped to the ground.

“What’s going on?” he asked, managing to string the question together.

“Let’s find out,” his mother replied, cheekily.

He allowed her to lead him up to a certain point. Once the seated guests, all bikers, turned to study them, Alec froze again. His boots rooted to the ground, his mother protesting softly that he should keep moving, Alec did the opposite, reeling back from everyone. He couldn’t breathe!

Floundering for air, he gasped like a fish out of water, and he forced his arm free from Isolde, stumbling away from her and everyone else.

“I can’t…” he gasped, beginning to claw at his hoodie.

He slammed into a hard chest, and he leaned in to whoever this was when they wrapped their arms around his middle. “Breathe,” a familiar deep voice instructed. “Easy now.”

Alec’s vision cleared. The black and red dots popping up receded and he made sense of where his hands were gripping. Releasing the soft lapels of the familiar tux, he arched his head back and peered into JT’s concerned face.

No longer wrapped up in the heavy sound of his wheezing breaths, Alec took air in shakily. Still, his heart stamped a tattoo into his ribs, and his limbs quaked with their sudden weakness. He knew as long as he remained in JT’s arms, he wasn’t in real danger. That JT wouldn’t let him get hurt.

Forming the question of why he was appearing to him now, suddenly, and right before Alec was going to leave for Switzerland, he never got the chance to ask.

“You still with me?” JT asked, beating him to the punch.

Alec nodded.

“Good,” he said, giving him a squeeze and bringing him closer, if it were possible. Their bodies were already flush together. Alec didn’t even mind. He wasn’t about to let go of JT, not when he had him in his arms again. But he couldn’t bring himself to beg the alpha to stay—to forget what he’d told him in the penthouse five days ago.

Finally regaining the ability of speech, Alec whispered, “Why?” Then as if he couldn’t contain it, the anxiety of losing JT all over again bubbled out again, he said, “We’re leaving.”

“I know,” JT said, smiling softly now. It only touched the corners of his thin lips, lifting them up slightly, but it was a sign of hope. No anger flowed off him. Given how they’d left on shitty terms, Alec felt his heart easing with the burden of guilt. Leaving room for longing for this big man to crowd in. “Your mother told me,” he explained.

Alec turned and found his mother…talking to JT’s friend, Wren Forrester. The handsome beta who, unlike the others, wore a tux like JT. Seeing Wren reminded Alec why he shouldn’t be clinging to JT.

Extricating himself from the alpha, he stared up at him. Alec sucked in a breath, held it, felt it burn his lungs, and then he released it slowly, shudderingly. “What’s going on?”

He sucked in a breath, held it, felt it burn his lungs, and then he released it slowly, shudderingly.

JT smiled wider. “We’re getting married again…if you’ll have me.”

“What?” Alec’s head swam with this news. Realizing that JT wasn’t pulling his leg, looking back and seeing the officiant now materializing in front of the arch, he faced JT again. “But why?”

“I love you,” JT said, tilting his head. “I thought I made that obvious.” Leaning away, straightening to his full six-feet-six, he rubbed a hand over his dark, bristly beard. Though the hairs were still short, he was obviously growing it. Another remainder of how long they’d been apart.

“JT… I can’t.”

“I know you said you don’t love me, but I’m calling bullshit.”

Alec flinched. “It’s true,” he deadpanned to the best of his ability. His nonchalance didn’t clear off JT’s small smile.

“This grand gesture is,” Alec sought the right word, “thoughtful.”

“Just thoughtful?” JT lowered his hand from stroking his jaw.

“Romantic, even. But there’s more here,” he fanned a hand between them. “How can I trust you to give me what I want?”

“I said I’d meet you halfway. I’ll share everything. You’ll really be my other half this time.”

Alec shook his head. “I… I don’t know if I can believe that.”

“If this has to do with the gunman, I handled it.”

“As you said,” Alec told him primly, his lips twisting down further. His heart chipped off a bit more. “I’m just scared, okay? I’m scared for me and the baby—but, I’m also seriously freaked out for you.”

There. He said it.

All of this was about JT. If Alec had a place in his heart, too. Sure, he said he loved him. But love didn’t need to announce itself; it had to be in the silence through, and certainly demonstrated through action.

Swallowing hard, Alec asked, “If we do this, how do I know you won’t walk out again?”

JT clenched his jaw, a muscle leaping there. “I left the first time, and that’s my fault. The second time I had the sense you were ready to toss me out on my ass whether I liked it or not.”

Alec sighed. “Fine. That’s my bad.” He pressed his fingers to his temple, a headache burgeoning. It didn’t match the heaviness in his heart though. “JT, I want to. I do.”

“You’re afraid we’ll keep hurting each other.”

Alec raised his brows. “Aren’t you?”

JT nodded. “Sure, yeah. It’s absolutely possible. I also know I can’t stand to live without you now that I know what my life can be like with you in it. At this moment, I’m hurting more because that’s the truer possibility.”

Lowering his head, Alec sniffled. His tears melded with the snow, the world becoming one blurry mass of white. His shoulders heaved and he felt JT’s arms drawing him in, his hard chest providing support again as it had so many times before.

Alec wouldn’t deny it: JT had spoken his fears. And they weren’t all about getting shot, but rather living through the world carrying this hole in his heart. He’d done it for the past eight weeks since his split with the alpha, and it’s been hard. If he didn’t have to do it anymore, he didn’t see why he should.

“Alec.” JT cupped Alec’s face, lifting it up so their eyes were locked. “I can’t make up for what I’ve done in the past, and I can’t promise you every step of tomorrow, but I’d like to be your present and future anyways.”

“JT,” Alec warbled his name, sure he was ugly crying now. Snotting all over the place. He sniffled loudly.

“Marry me again. Make me the happiest alpha alive.”

Alec nodded, unable to lodge the words out. Beaming, JT brushed their lips, the kiss short and sweet and chaste, but it sealed their promise anyways.

“Hey,” Wren called, raising a hand.

Alec turned in JT’s arms, spying his mother blowing him a kiss. The group of JT’s biker friends were turned in their chairs, watching the show. The officiant stood at the end of the aisle, waiting patiently for the grooms to proceed. And although this was a renewal of their vows, it was a million times more perfect than the first ceremony.

JT gave him another squeeze. “Let’s not make them wait.”

Alec and JT met up with Alec’s mother and JT’s friend and former roommate.

His mother touched a gloved hand to her ruby red lips. “It must have slipped my mind to tell you.” She trailed her gaze over Alec, smiling. “I do wish you could have worn a suit, but you look handsome. You both do.” She turned her radiant smile on JT.

Meanwhile, the last time Alec saw Wren, he looked downright annoyed that his friend had gotten married on the down-low. But Alec had also sensed animosity. Disapproval. Jealousy even, all of those emotions churning in that small office in The Strix MC clubhouse. Only now, Wren wasn’t radiating any of those emotions.

Suddenly they were all besties—it was jarring. Though he promised to marry JT, he hesitated now, needing another moment alone with his husband.

One look at Alec, and JT gestured for the others to head on without them. Alone again, the big alpha turned his back to their guests, blocking the trellis and officiant and the whole winter wedding scene from Alec. The white world could have bled away, and Alec would be none the wiser.

Staring deep into JT’s eyes, he said, “I…”

JT shook his head. “Don’t say it. Please.” For a second a pained look flashed across his face, and then his eyes sparkled with what could only be tears. They didn’t fall, but they were there. And they weren’t sad. “I’ll keep marrying you until you love me, if time’s what you need to forgive me for leaving you.”

“JT,” Alec started again, JT silencing him with his mouth now. He should have been annoyed, but instead he tiptoed up into his kiss, his arms twining around the big alpha’s neck. When they parted, Alec’s lips tingled from the heady pressure and the anticipation of there being more because… “I love you,” he blurted.

“You don’t have to say it now, or to make me feel better.”

Alec rolled his eyes. “I’m not.” He grinned then. “I do love you. And I’m just nervous. I’m embarking on a grand adventure, you know.”

JT’s eyes widened, now on the receiving end of his own surprise blowing up in his face. Alec laughed; he couldn’t help the mirth bubbling out. Soon, JT was joining him, his deep chuckle washing over Alec, the way his mouth would trail all the way to his groin, give him immense pleasure, and loving attention.

Heart throbbing harder, Alec said, more solemnly, “I will marry you. Just once more. And I’ll love you…forever.”

JT wiped at his eyes and when Alec teased, “Are you crying?” He readily refuted it—a bit too readily. When Alec kept up his teasing, JT swept him closer and lowered his head, arching Alec back and deepening their tangled tongue and bruised lips.

“Save it for the vows and second honeymoon,” Wren hollered from the trellis, pointing to an imaginary watch on his wrist.

At the end of the aisle, best man Wren tapped Alec on the shoulder. “Hey, man. Can I speak to you a minute?”

“Sure,” Alec said warily, especially when JT let him step off to the side.

Wren lowered his voice. “I want to apologize. In person. On my own. I’m sure JT’s done it for me like a hundred times.”

Alec didn’t refute it, and Wren chuckled softly, the mirth not reaching his eyes completely. Sorrow and regret shone back at Alec. “He’s told me about the shooting, and the danger, and how I messed up your honeymoon.”

“It’s all right,” Alec said.

Wren called him out on it. “It isn’t though. Don’t lie to me for my sake. If I were in your position, and you pulled the stupid shit I did, I’d have my hands wrapped around your throat.” He sighed, smiling more genuinely now. “That’s why you’re good for him. The best, really. JT needs a guy like you to mellow him out.”

Alec watched Wren lower his head, dig the toe of his black, polished shoe in the snow, trace out a circle.

“I understand if you don’t want me near him. I’ll keep my distance after this. It’s the least I can do.”

Alec stared harder, and Wren looked up at the lengthy silence, his features pained. That’s when he knew he couldn’t do it. He didn’t want to separate Wren from JT, not when he sensed true contrition from the beta biker.

Smiling, Alec shook his head. “No. I want to see you around him, because you’re good for JT, too.” Alec glanced at all of the bikers in the crowd. “You all are. You’re his family, and I trust JT chose his right.” He shrugged, grinning. “I mean, he chose me after all.”

Wren shared his smile.

Together they returned to JT, Alec more lighthearted now he’d cleared the air of the elephant in the corner of Central Park where they traded their vows again.

After, Alec was surprised by a four-tiered cake, and JT was shocked by how quick his adorable, little omega could move when smashing some cake into his face.

It was the perfect way to start their forever.