Epilogue
Harley
"What are you thinking about?" Scott's deep baritone caressed my ears.
We were parked in a wide open field, and he was sitting on the ground with me between his legs as we watched a meteor shower. It had been three days since I'd told my story to the council and in those three days, Scott and I had been completely wrapped up in each other, making up for lost time.
"Wondering where I go from here," I responded, my eyes trained on the natural fireworks above us. "You know what I mean?"
"I think so." Behind me, Scott rubbed his nose against the soft skin behind my ear, before sucking lightly. "What do you want to do?"
I laughed. "I have no idea. I don't have any real education or skills." I shrugged, smiling when my Alpha began to nibble on my neck. "Mmm, that feels good."
"Yeah?" Scott switched to the other side. "I can think of some awesome skills you have."
I couldn't help but laugh as I snuggled back into his arms. "Well, as flattering as that is, I don't think I actually want to make a living on my back."
"Huh? What are you talking about?" Before I could answer, he caught my drift and laughed himself. "Oh, um, no, love. Those skills are damn near legendary, but that is absolutely not what I meant."
"What then?"
"Seriously? We had big plans, once upon a time, remember? Now there's nothing to stop us from joining the tiny house slash caravan housing craze." He bit down lightly on my earlobe. "We’re going to be together anyway."
When I didn't answer right away, I felt his body stiffen behind me and not in a good way.
"Harley? Has something changed?" He drew in a ragged breath. "Did you change your mind about us being together?"
"No, of course not, Scott." I tried to pick my words carefully. "It's just that maybe we should give it some time and see if that is really what is best. You know, not rush into anything."
Scott eased away from my back and rocked to his knees before standing. I watched from the corner of my eye as he paced back toward the van. In the stillness of the night, I could easily hear his measured breaths, a sure sign that he was fighting to control his emotions. Knowing how much he hated to be seen as weak, I kept my eyes on the sky and pretended not to notice.
When he finally had himself under control, he walked back my direction and stopped a few feet away. "If that's what you want, Harley. I think I'm going to lie down for a bit."
I glanced back at him in surprise – it wasn't even four in the morning and the meteorites were still going strong. "Are you okay?"
"Yeah." Instead of elaborating, he let himself into the van and left me alone to stare at the sky.
When the sunrise bleached the sky too light for the stars to be seen a few hours later, I decided it was time for me to retire as well. I climbed into the van and found the bed pulled down and neatly made, so, empty.
It only took a second to find Scott folded into the driver's seat, his hands behind his head and eyes closed.
"Hey." I jostled his shoulder ever so gently. "Wake up."
"I'm awake."
"Oh. Why are you up here instead of in bed?"
"Just working some things through, Harley. You go ahead and turn in."
I couldn't stop the frown that creased my forehead, but I did as he told me and climbed into the bed to wait for him. An hour passed. Then another. And another. Finally telling myself that he must have dozed off, I rolled over onto my stomach and surrendered to the exhaustion trying to pull me under.
When I woke a little before seven that evening, there was a cup of coffee and a plate of cold scrambled eggs and bacon sitting on top of the laptop on the shelf, but Scott was long gone. When I lifted the plate, I found a scrap of paper.
Harley,
I need to burn some energy. I might be gone a while.
Scott
Well, shit.
I read for an hour or two and then tidied up the van. When midnight approached and I still hadn't heard from him, I prepare his favorite turkey and mozzarella sandwich from the ingredients stashed in the tiny fridge only to throw it out at dinner time when he still hadn't returned.
As the pinks and orange streaks of the impending sunrise began to color the sky and there was still no word from him, I was nearing an all on panic. Afraid that he might have been injured, I had just decided to venture out and look for him when I saw a familiar four-legged form in the distance. As he got closer, I saw that Scott's fur was caked with mud and he was limping as he walked.
Grabbing a couple of water bottles, I leaned against the van to wait.
"Hey."
Scott raised his head to return my greeting, but skirted around me, careful not to touch me. Then, throwing himself into his shift, he accepted the water bottle I held out and drained in it three swallows. When I held the second one out, the corner of his lips ticked slightly upward and he drained it as well, stuffing both into the recycling bag that was tied to the bumper. "Thanks. I needed that."
"I bet."
Instead of responding, he reached up and flipped down a panel on the side, turning on the spigot that he'd unearthed and showering the mud and debris off. "That's better."
I followed him inside where he pulled on a pair of shorts, slid his feet into his flip-flops, and then set to putting together a meal.
We ate in silence and scrubbed up the dishes.
"Why are you mad at me?" I finally asked when the last dish had been put away.
"I'm not mad at you, Harley," he responded tiredly. "Didn't you find my note? I said I might be gone for a while."
"Yeah, I guess you did." I started to turn away, to give him the space that he clearly wanted, but then I thought better of it. "Damn it, Scott. What the hell? You spent how many months chasing my shadow around the damned country just to freeze me out now that I'm here?"
"It's not about me, Harley," Scott sighed heavily. "I'm trying to respect your wishes."
"What wishes? What are you talking about?"
"What did you say when I asked you what you were thinking the other night?"
"You mean about where we go from here?" This wasn't clearing anything up.
"That's not what you said, Harley." Scott's eyes pinned mine. "You said I not we."
"Are you fucking serious?" I snarled, balling up the dishtowel in my hand and throwing it at his head. "You're going to just write us off because you don't like my fucking word choice?"
"Don't do that, Harley!" he snapped back. "Don't fucking deflect this onto me! You also said that you weren't sure that you wanted to be with me, that we shouldn't rush into anything." He clenched his fist at his side. "Those are the wishes I am trying to respect and it's damn hard for me to do when you're close to me."
Shit. I'd completely forgotten about that.
The fight drained out of me and I felt my entire body droop as I sat down on the edge of the bed. "Oh."
"Oh? Really? That's all you have for me?" Scott was glaring at me, but I could see the pain in his eyes.
"Yeah. That's all I've got," I agreed with a sigh. "It's not you, Alpha. It's me. You know that."
"No. I don't," he huffed. "How the fuck can you even say that? You've been all I wanted since the day we met."
"Scotty, you know what the doctor said. I might never be whole again." I gave up on holding back my tears. "You deserve someone who can give you everything, baby."
"Har? What are you talking about?" Scott lowered himself down to his knees in front of me.
"Kids." I reminded him. In every dream we had ever dreamed about our future together, Scott had insisted on kids. Lots of them. "The doctors said that with the number of times those bastards cut me open, I probably can't have them now." I took the dishtowel from him and used it to wipe my tears. "Too much scar tissue."
"Is that seriously what you think?" Scott stared at me, shock and sadness warring for control of his face. "You think that I would walk away from you if you can't have babies?"
"You love kids," I choked out. "You've always wanted them. Maybe you should find someone who can do that for you."
"Oh, baby." Scott pulled me off the bed and cradled me in his lap, wrapping his arms tightly around me. "If we decide we want kids, we can find a way, Har. But what I want more than anything is to wake up with you for the rest of my life." He kissed my lips and gently rubbed the tip of his nose against mine. "I want us to explore the world together and have all the adventures we used to talk about for hours."
I closed my eyes against the next onslaught of tears. "What if it's not enough, Scott? What if you end up resenting me for not being able to give you a family of your own blood?"
"That's never going to happen, Har." My Alpha tipped my chin up, forcing me to meet his eyes. "Ours is going to be the greatest love story ever live, baby, and when we're old and gray, that is going to be what our hearts remember."
The End