Chapter 15
Dom hated losing control. Control was the only thing he had in life. He didn’t let anything happen to him without his permission. All the consequences in his life were from decisions he had thought through and made on his own, but not this. Not Anna. She had come out of nowhere and stolen his heart without permission. To say he was lovesick wouldn’t even come close to the truth. He was borderline depressed. Without her, the house was too quiet. Gelato was grouchy, because no matter what, Dom didn’t rub his head the way Anna did. Cooking for one wasn’t as fun as cooking for two. He cursed under his breath, nicking his thumb with the knife. It wasn’t deep enough for stiches, but deep enough to bleed, and he sucked it into his mouth with an attitude.
This was all her fault. Why did she have to lie? It wasn’t that she lied. Everybody lied, it was that she had broken his trust. His life was in danger and he didn’t reach out to anyone. He didn’t have friends, and he didn’t need anyone, but he had let her in. He had allowed it, and like a thief in the night she had stolen his heart and made him believe she was worth it.
But was she?
His heart said yes. His mind said differently.
He wondered if he was overreacting. Was he wrong for sending her away? He didn’t even hear her out. If he was wrong, would she take him back if he apologized? Should he wait until she apologized first? She was, after all, the one in the wrong. If he was honest, he had some things he needed to admit to her, and they could stand to get some things out in the open, but she had made a conscious choice to lie to him. He was lying by omission to protect her.
Did that make what he did any better?
*****
Anna laid in her bed, woken by a noise she didn't recognize.
There it was again, banging on her front door. She groaned and rolled over.
“Anna Adams! You get up!”
It was Rachel. She could tell from the voice.
“I know you’re in there.”
She had no reason to get up. It was a Saturday. She didn’t have class, and she didn’t want to talk to her friend. She groaned and put her pillow over her head as Rachel continued to bang on the door.
If she didn’t let her in, her neighbors would complain and then she would have to explain to the landlord, or worse, to the cops, that it was just a friend. She really didn’t want to go through all that.
With a huff, she stomped to the door.
“Fine. Come in!” She yanked the door open and stalked away, not waiting for her to come in. “Close the door on your way in.”
“Finally!” Rachel frowned behind Anna and covered her nose. “Ew. You reek!”
“Thanks.”
She should. She hadn’t done much in the two weeks since Dom had kicked her out of his cabin. Aside from throwing on clothes, so she wouldn’t get fined for public indecency, she went to class and came home. Anything else, like cooking or cleaning, required too much energy. An entire week passed, then seven more days after that, and she felt like she was dying the slowest death. What would she be like in three weeks? A month? Would she be inconsolable?
“And you look like the cat dragged you in after a car ran you over. You need to shower.”
She didn't want to do anything. She wanted to lay down and stay there until summer was over. Anything else needed to include Dom, and since she was sure her plans weren’t changing to include him, she was content under the covers.
It wasn’t long before Rachel snatched them back off her head.
“I’m not kidding, Ann. You stink. Honest to God. He is just a man! Get your ass up. You need to get a new guy, and I can tell you right now, no man is going to come near you with that rat's nest on your head.”
Dom would, she was sure of it.
“Rach, what do you want? Can’t you just leave me alone?”
She sat on the edge of the bed, barely shifting it with her weight. “No can do, babe. You’re my friend, and that’s what friends do.”
‘Well, as a friend, can you buy me some more ice cream? I ran out of the Bluebell.”
“I will not. It’s one thing that you stink; I’m not making it worse by allowing you to get fat.”
She huffed and rolled over. Rachel wasn’t helping her mood. If anything, she was making it worse.
“You just don’t understand. Just leave me, Rach. Go, and I’ll see you Monday.”
“No. No. No. No. Listen, babe. You have five minutes to get up, or I'm going to fill a cup with water and pour it on you. You’re either taking a shower, or I’m giving you a bath in bed.”
What were the odds she wasn’t playing?
When she felt Rachel get up from the bed, she decided it was best not to take the chance. Cleaning herself would take work, she didn’t want to add cleaning the bed, too.
When Rachel returned, Anna was already standing under the shower stream, detangling the knots in her hair.
“Good. A shower will help you clear your head.”
Rachel sat on the toilet talking while Anna washed and listened to tales of her daddy and where she’d recently been. It wasn’t that interesting, and Rachel knew that. She was only giving her a semblance of normalcy so she could feel like she hadn’t missed anything in the two weeks she had spent wasting away in the bed.
She stepped from the shower, with a towel wrapped around her body and a towel wrapped around her head.
“Feel better?”
She actually did.
“Yeah.”
“Good. Now get dressed; the kitchen is next. It stinks in there, too.”
It should, considering she had been ordering food all week. Dom’s allowance had given her a considerable size nest egg, and so she splurged, not cooking and not eating anything healthy. Dishes were piled in the kitchen, and the trash was overflowing. Anna went to take the trash out, and when she returned, her bed was stripped clean.
“They’re in the wash.”
She smiled. Rachel got on her nerves sometimes, but she was a true friend. Together, they cleaned the kitchen. Anna washed, and Rachel dried. It took an hour, but finally, the kitchen looked livable again. They both crashed on the living room couch, tired but content.
“Thanks for coming.”
“That’s what friends are for,” she said, crossing her legs as she looked Anna over. She didn’t look too different. Her wet hair was in a high ponytail, and she was comfortable in her sweatpants and cropped shirt. She was silent for a moment before she spoke.
“I was worried about you.”
Anna felt her heart lurch, and in a rare show of friendship, she hugged her. “Thanks, Rach. I’m alright. Just hurt.”
“Talk to me.”
Where should she start? There was so much to say.
“I just…”
“Take your time,” Rachel said, rubbing a calming hand on Anna’s leg.
“I just ruin everything.”
In her mind, she really did.
“I told a lie, and now Dom won’t talk to me. It’s like I can’t have nice things.”
“Oh, honey. That’s not true.”
Anna nodded with tears in her eyes. “Yes, it is. Trust me. I know. Every time I have something, I mess it up. I don’t deserve to be happy. Look at what happens when I am.”
“That sounds human to me. Trust me, we all think were fuck ups in some way or another. I didn’t get straight A’s like my parents wanted, and when they decided they wouldn’t pay for my college tuition anymore, I started stripping to pay off my loans. I’m not even the dream daughter, but I’m here, and I’m doing alright.”
“But...”
“But nothing, girlie. We all have a past. Even Dom. I’m sure of it. He’s got his secrets and things that he’s not so proud of. That’s what makes life worth living – the ups and the downs. I bet if you talked to him, maybe explain and apologize, it would all work out.”
“But that’s just it, Rachel. I can’t tell him what I did. It will make him hate me even more. At least right now he’s just mad, but if I told him the truth and admitted exactly what I did, he will not only hate me, but the good memories we had together, too.”
“So that’s it then?”
Anna nodded. How could it be anything else?
“Well if you’re just going to quit, I suppose he’s free for me to go after then.”
Anna’s mouth fell open, stunned that a woman she would consider a friend would admit something like that.
“What?” she asked a little too innocently. “You’re not going after him. According to you, it’s done. Over. Finnito, so he’s open game. How much did you say he paid you monthly? That sounds very doable.”
“But you already have a sugar daddy?”
“And?” She picked a bit of dirt from her nails. “I only see him every other week. I bet I could negotiate a similar deal with Dom that wouldn’t overcomplicate anything. What’s his username again? He treated you so nicely; I wonder if I can get the same treatment.”
Anna growled and pushed Rachel. “How could you?”
“How could you?”
“Excuse me?”
Rachel spoke calmly, unbothered with Anna’s anger or her reddened face.
“You’re clearly in love with this man.” She held her hand up, preventing Anna from going forth with her lie of denial. “You are. I can see it all on your face and yet you’re willing to throw it all away because of a lie. I would rather know that I did everything I could to have him than know I could have done something and wonder what if for the rest of my life. You think I’m the only woman on earth who has eyes? Who can see he’s not only sexy as hell, but kind? I bet he was a beast in bed.”
Anna’s fist clenched just from imagining anyone in bed with Dom but her.
“Judging by your face, I’d say he’s a stallion and knows how to cook too? Mm.” She smacked her lips. “Delicious. You can take him home to meet Momma.”
Anna clenched her fists so tight they were turning white, and she felt like she was two seconds from hitting her best friend.
“Not even you would stoop so low to be with my sloppy seconds.”
“Of course not,” she said, shrugging with nonchalance. “I just wanted to see how riled up you’d get.”
She released all the breath left her chest and relaxed, hating how right Rachel was.
“Which proves my point. You can’t just go because he said go. You need to find out if this thing is over, because if not, you’re going to regret it for the rest of your life.”
She was right.
Dammit.
She was right again. She had to do something. At least try because she and Dom were worth that much.