CHAPTER FORTY

If Sabrina had to guess, she probably got three hours of sleep, but she somehow had the jittery energy that came from too much coffee. She grabbed the keys to the rental car and texted Z that she was on the way. She was glad Z was the one headed to New Mexico with her.

Justin might be skeptical about another group of Lost Causes, but Sabrina kept coming back to it. Why else would Amy keep showing up to her? It seemed too strange to be just a coincidence.

The thought dancing around in her mind all night, though, was that if another group of Lost Causes really had existed, that meant Patricia had flat-out lied to them about never using the serum. More important for Sabrina, did that mean Nash had lied, too?

She wanted to believe that he had nothing to do with it. Obviously, even if there had been another group of Lost Causes, he wouldn’t have been involved in giving them the serum. He was only twelve at the time of Amy’s death. But he was running this case with Patricia. Wouldn’t he have seen every file there was on the serum? Was it just wishful thinking on her part to think he was out of the loop? It was yet another reason why she was desperate to get down to New Mexico and find some answers.

Rocket’s bark snapped her back to attention. He was peering out the living room window, barking his head off at something — or someone.

Her heart thumped and she took the pepper spray out of her purse. She kept her back against the wall and peeked outside the window just enough that she wouldn’t be seen by whoever was outside.

It was Nash.

He was getting out of his car. What the hell was he doing here? Did he somehow know that she and Z were about to embark on a trip down to New Mexico?

She needed to act completely normal. The last thing she wanted to do was tip him off.

She met him on the sidewalk in front of her house. His five o’clock shadow made him look more rugged than usual. How was it that part of her still wanted him to throw her up against the car and make out with her even while she was conflicted about whether she could trust him?

“What did I do?” he asked as soon as she walked up. Then she followed his gaze to her hands. The pepper spray. She’d forgotten she was still holding it. He was actually making a joke. It was so unexpected that she found herself smiling.

“Nothing. Just being cautious, like you suggested.”

“That’s good.”

“What are you doing here?”

“The security cam we put in the back of your house is going in and out. I want to reinstall it.” He paused and their eyes locked. She thought he would look away quickly, just as he’d done every time they’d made eye contact at Cytology the day before, but instead he kept his gaze steady. Sabrina felt her body moving toward his — a magnetic pull she couldn’t resist. Were they going to kiss? Should they kiss? Never mind, she knew the answer to that and she really didn’t care.

But instead of moving closer, he abruptly looked away and took a very deliberate step back from her.

Her cheeks flushed at the rejection. “Was there anything else you needed?” she asked shortly. “I’ve got to go.”

Taken aback by her tone, he asked, “Is everything okay?”

“I’m just confused which version of you showed up today,” she replied. “It’s like you’re two different people sometimes. There’s Nice Nash, and then there’s Agent Nash, who doesn’t always answer my questions and won’t even look at me.”

The tiniest of smiles appeared at the corners of his lips. It was the opposite reaction than she’d expected.

“Nice Nash?” He took one step closer to her. Her pulse instantly started racing. “He sounds boring.”

Nash’s jade eyes searched hers, glowing with an intensity so fierce that for the first time she realized he was having an equally difficult time figuring her out as she was him. “You sure everything is okay, Sabrina? I’m being serious.”

Part of her wished she could tell him everything — fill him in on Amy, on New Mexico — but she couldn’t let her attraction to him get the upper hand. Wasn’t she the one lecturing everyone else last night about being careful?

“Yeah. Everything is fine,” she said in what she meant to be an upbeat tone. “I mean, as okay as it can be right now.” She let out a laugh that sounded super weird to her, but hopefully he didn’t notice. “I better get to school, then.” Sabrina’s attempt at sounding casual was just plain awkward. Nash knew something was up. He wasn’t moving.

“Are you nervous about Wincott’s class after yesterday? Is that what this is about?”

Perfect. He’d just handed her an excuse for her weirdness. “Yeah, it was pretty awful. I can’t stop thinking about it.”

He looked at her seriously. “Skip his class today if it doesn’t feel right. Greenly’s, too.” He grabbed her hand fiercely and caught Sabrina by surprise. She was even more surprised when he didn’t let go. “Promise me you’ll do whatever you can to stay safe today.”

“I will,” she said, though she had no idea what the day would hold. “I just want to get closer to some answers.”

That part was at least the truth.

As soon as she drove away, a pit formed in her stomach. It really did seem that Nash cared about her — at least about her safety. Or was it possible that he was on to her, and his entire visit had been designed to reel her back into trusting him?

Instead of driving to Z’s, Sabrina drove in the direction of Cedar Springs High. She pulled over to dial Z.

“Where are you? You’re late,” Z said.

“Meet me at my locker instead.”

Twenty minutes later, she found Z in the designated spot.

“What’s with the change of plans?” Z asked impatiently. “We’re still going, right?”

“Yeah, but we need to leave our phones at school. Nash and Patricia can use them to track us.”

“And I thought I was supposed to be the paranoid one,” Z mumbled as she followed Sabrina back out to the parking lot.

*    *    *

The traffic on the way to New Mexico was more brutal than Sabrina had anticipated. It had already taken them an extra hour, and the only stop they’d made was to buy disposable phones.

A police car cruised by them and Sabrina stiffened.

“I’m glad I’m not the only one who doesn’t think having a badge means you can be trusted,” Z said. She flipped to a new song on the road-trip playlist she’d made the previous night when she couldn’t sleep.

“So if there really was a group of Lost Causes before us, do you think the reason Patricia didn’t tell us is because she didn’t want us to know that the first group all died?”

“All died together. In the same place, at the same time,” Z emphasized.

“What if they didn’t tell us because the FBI knows it really was just a freak accident that had nothing to do with their case?” Sabrina fully knew this could be her feelings for Nash talking, but after seeing him earlier, she couldn’t help making one last rationalization. “If the FBI did a whole investigation into Amy’s crash off the bridge and realized that it definitely was an accident, I can kind of understand why Patricia wouldn’t bring it up. If she had told me that everyone in the last group who helped the FBI had died, I don’t know if I would’ve signed on to help with Lily’s case. Even if they said it was a car accident.”

Z didn’t even pause to think about it. “It had to be something from their case that got Amy and the others killed and that’s why they didn’t tell us. And I’m really starting to wonder if it connects to our case. I don’t believe in coincidences. Plus if it was just a freak crash, why did Amy tell you not to trust Patricia and Nash?”

Sabrina sighed. Somehow she’d allowed herself to forget about that part of it. “Maybe Amy’s family can give us some kind of clue about the case they were trying to solve.”

A gas station popped into view on the horizon, surrounded by nothing but dry desert. “Finally,” Z said. “We’re running on fumes.”

Sabrina sent a status update text to the others, then she joined Z in the tiny convenience store.

Z was headed to the cash register holding three sticks of beef jerky. “Want one?” she asked.

“Beef jerky? Seriously?”

“I used to eat it just because I knew it grossed my mom out and then I got addicted. It’s a comfort food.”

“Mac and cheese is a comfort food. Beef jerky is just gross.”

Sabrina handed her soda to the man at the cash register. He was so old that she was worried he was going to keel over before he rung them up. Instead, he just stared at her as if he couldn’t believe he had a customer.

“I’ll just get this, please,” she told him, trying to hurry the transaction along.

Z gave Sabrina a weird look. “Who are you talking to?”

Sabrina looked back at the cash register and the old man was gone. But right behind where he’d been standing was a framed photo of him holding up a dollar bill. Sabrina pointed to the photo. “That guy.”

A young clerk walked up and saw Sabrina pointing at the photo. “That’s my dad. This place was his life. He was here every single day from open to close. Even died here.”

Z and Sabrina exchanged a look. Sabrina had just asked a ghost to ring up her soda.

Z raised an eyebrow at her. “Beef jerky?”

Sabrina rolled her eyes and grabbed it.

*    *    *

It took another hour before they finally got to Taos. Amy had grown up near Albuquerque, but according to housing records Andrew dug up, her mom moved here several years earlier. Taos seemed like a peaceful place to live, with New Age stores and mineral galleries in the place of coffee and fast-food chains, and a Native American influence everywhere.

Z pulled off the commercial street and onto a residential one, if you could call it that. They were basically in the middle of the desert, and the houses were built at least a half mile or more away from each other. The views of the mountains were amazing, but living here had to be lonely.

“We’re good with the cover story?” Sabrina asked.

“I guess. But I still think saying we’re doing a report for school is lame.”

“Let me know if you come up with something better in the next thirty seconds because we’re here.” Sabrina pointed to the small adobe house with a bright turquoise door in front of them. A large dream catcher made of woven vines dangled from the doorway, and the red, white and black feathers attached to the bottom swayed in the breeze. “So you’ll do the talking and I’ll do the listening?” Z asked. “Hopefully Amy’s family will do all the talking.”