Megan

“London?” Megan asked, sure she’d heard Sam incorrectly. “As in England?”

Sam nodded, watching Megan warily out of the corner of her eye as she poured herself another cup of coffee.

Sam and Devon were seated across from Megan at the breakfast table. Zander was notably absent. Megan hadn’t seen him since her embarrassing asthma attack the previous morning.

“How long is he gone for?” Megan asked.

“He didn’t say,” Sam replied.

“But you told him I wanted to talk to him?” Megan pressed.

Sam nodded.

“I’m sure it was just a last minute business thing, Megs,” Devon offered. “He’ll be back soon enough.”

“Right,” she said glumly. But it certainly didn’t feel that way.

* * *

Devon was wrong. It’d been more than two weeks and Zander was still on his so-called business trip. Megan grew more anxious with each passing day. She’d left him text messages and voicemails begging him to call her, but he didn’t.

His absence was killing her, but she couldn’t let it show. Not with Sam watching her like a nervous mother hen. If Megan caved in to her slowly breaking heart Sam would only hate Zander more. And Megan had enough to worry about without adding that to her plate.

Thankfully, Megan at least had her film project to keep her busy. She spent her days at Cor-Tec and her nights editing. But it did little to curb the ache in her heart.

Walking the halls of Cor-Tec felt like chasing a ghost. Everything made her think of Zander. And he came up in nearly every personnel interview she conducted. She felt like she was in a nightmare she couldn’t wake up from. This wasn’t at all how her semester abroad was supposed to go. She was supposed to get the guy and indulge in Ireland’s wild beauty.

Lately, Megan had only seen the inside of her bedroom. At least she had Eggsy to keep her company. The dog had become her shadow. It seemed he was just as lost without Zander around. She could tell Eggsy was torn between loyalty to Devon, his owner, and Zander, the man who’d cared for him for the past few years. Maybe that’s why the dog chose to spend his days with Megan?

Whatever the reason, Megan was happy for Eggsy’s company. Between Sam’s insane hours interning at the hospital in Dublin and Zander’s disappearing act, Megan was feeling incredibly lonely.

Eggsy was currently sprawled at the foot of Megan’s bed. She had her toes wedged under him against the chill that crept into her room during the late hours of the night. A knock sounded on the bathroom door that adjoined her room to Sam and Devon’s. Eggsy’s tail began to thump wildly on the bed and Megan felt a pang of sorrow. It’s not Zander, she thought bitterly. He’s left us.

“Come in,” Megan called.

Devon poked his head in. “Yer still up?”

Megan shrugged and Devon took that as an invitation to join her.

He sat on the edge of Megan’s bed, scratching Eggsy affectionately. “Whatcha working on?”

“Voice tags,” Megan replied, knowing Devon didn’t really know what that meant.

Devon had been overly smothering lately. It’s not that Megan didn’t appreciate his efforts. She knew he meant well, but his behavior only served to remind her of Zander’s disappearance.

Devon folded his long legs in so he could rest his chin on his knee. “Sam’s staying at the hospital, again,” he muttered, glumly. “She’s a shift in the morning, so . . .” He trailed off with a shrug.

It explained why Devon was in Megan’s room. She knew this trip probably wasn’t everything he’d been hoping for either. His girlfriend was moody and distant, drowning in her studies, his best friend had pulled a Houdini and Megan was hiding in her film project. Not to mention even Eggsy had abandoned Devon.

“Wanna play cards?” Devon asked.

She didn’t, but Zander had bailed on Devon too and Megan couldn’t help feeling it was her fault. Her guilt won out. “Sure.”

Devon grinned and dashed back to his room to find playing cards. Megan sighed and saved her project before putting her laptop away. She couldn’t stop herself from checking to see if Zander had replied to any of her messages before shutting it down completely. He hadn’t.

* * *

“So, are ye keen ta get some wild Ireland footage this weekend?” Devon asked as he dealt what felt like the millionth round of cards.

Megan shrugged and Devon stopped mid deal.

“Megs, what’s eatin’ ye?”

She shrugged again.

“Come off it, mate. You’ve been blithering on about camping in Ireland since I met ye, and now ye expect me to believe ye don’t care?”

“No, I’m excited. I just thought . . .” she trailed off.

“Ye thought Zander’d be joining us?”

“Yeah.”

“He’ll be back, Megs.”

“You don’t know that.”

“Well, I know Sam’s father is flying in for a meeting with him at the end of the week and Zander will have his arse handed to him if he misses it.”

Megan collected her cards, still not getting her hopes up.

Devon sighed. “Megs, I don’t know what ta tell ye. I wish I could make sense of things for ye.”

“You don’t have to.”

“But I think I do. Ye see, Zander’s a wee bit squeamish of drama.”

Megan frowned. “I know. He hates drama queens, I get it.”

Devon scrubbed his face. “I’m not saying it right. Maybe trauma is a better word?”

“What do you mean?”

“I think yer asthma attack threw him back to some things in his past that he hasn’t quite dealt with.”

“Did he say that?”

“Not exactly.”

“Devon, what are you talking about? In English, please.”

Devon exhaled and screwed up his face the way he did when he realized he’d said something he shouldn’t.

“Spill it, Devon,” Megan demanded.

“Has Zander ever talked about his parents with ye?”

“Only that they’re not part of his life.”

Devon shook his head. “I don’t feel right telling what’s not mine to tell, Megs. I only know bits an’ pieces anyway. But Zander’s been through some shite. He hates being made to feel helpless, and I think when he saw ye struggling it brought him back to a dark place.”

“But—”

Devon held up his hands. “That’s all I’ll say.”

“So what am I supposed to do with that?” Megan asked aggravated.

“Just know it’s not yer fault if he’s staying away. It’s how he deals with things. Give him space. He’ll come back when he’s ready.”

Megan nodded, digesting what Devon told her. He finished dealing cards and she scooped the rest of hers up, feeling the tightness in her chest loosen for the first time in weeks.