The next week flies by. I spend every minute baking and taking on more cake orders. It seems that as soon as one gets delivered, another two orders come in. It’s crazy and way more than I ever thought.

Today’s cake is a big number one for a baby’s first birthday. It’s almost done—I’ve just got to pipe around the edges and add the icing animals on top. It’s being collected in just over an hour for tomorrow’s party.

“Oh, that’s perfect,” Aileen exclaims when I show her the cake. “Thank you so much.”

She pays me for it before I follow behind her with the cake as she wrestles with her almost-one year old. I’m just waving her off when Aunt Addy pulls on to the drive. I can see from here she’s not looking too good.

“What’s wrong?” I ask when she opens the door.

“Vertigo,” is all she mumbles as she plods towards the front door.

“Get to bed,” I instruct, following her.

“Can’t; babysitting Sinead tonight. I’ll just have a rest on the sofa. I’m sure it’ll be fine.”

“I can do it.”

“No, you’re busy.” I look around the kitchen as she says this and see the bombsite I’ve created. I’ve still got more to do.

“It’s fine. I don’t mind.”

“Let me have a lie down and we’ll see.”

When Aunt Addy reappears an hour later, she looks horrendous and is clinging onto the worktop like she’s about to go down any second.

“Go back to bed. I’ll look after Sinead.”

“Really?” Aunt Addy asks, sounding very grateful.

“Of course.”

She walks back to bed after giving me Blake and Sinead’s address, and once I’ve packed up a load of baking supplies, I load them all into Aunt Addy’s car and head off.

I haven’t seen much of Blake this week. He came over during the weekend while Sinead was with his parents to finish the fence, but Aunt Addy was in so it put pay to any gawking out of the window. She may have given me the green light where Blake is concerned, but I’m still not convinced anything but looking is a good idea.

When I pull up to their house, I’m surprised to see the driveway’s empty. I’d psyched myself up to see Blake and I kind of hate that I’m now disappointed he’s not here. It appears his maintenance business is thriving as he rings Aunt Addy to help look after Sinead a couple of times a week.

I jump out the car and ring the doorbell, questioning if I’m at the right house.

After a couple of seconds, I hear footsteps heading my way before the door opens and Sinead’s head pops out.

“Addison, where’s Nan?”

“She’s ill so I offered to come over.”

“Oh,” she replies, sounding disappointed.

“I really need your help though.” That gets her attention. “I’ve got to deliver forty-eight cupcakes to a wedding tomorrow and I’m running out of time.”

That has the desired effect because in seconds, Sinead has a pair of shoes on and is helping me get my stuff from the boot of the car.

I’m impressed by Blake’s house as I follow Sinead through to the kitchen. It’s modern and homely. I’m not sure what I was expecting but it wasn’t this. I glance into the living room and see a giant comfortable looking sofa with loads of cushions on that looks perfect for reading or napping.

“Come on,” Sinead calls when she sees I’ve stopped.

“You’ve got a lovely home.”

“Thank you. Dad did all the work and I picked all the colours and furniture,” she states proudly.

“Really?”

“Yep, I spent ages looking through all the catalogues picking everything. It was great fun.”

“You’ve done a great job.” She beams at my praise and it makes my heart swell. “Come on then, have you got an apron? We’ve got some baking to do.”

Five hours and sixty cupcakes later, Sinead and I flop back on to the sofa. I’d discovered Blake had already left to sort out whatever job he’d been called out on. Sinead said he doesn’t mind her being home alone now she’s twelve, but not all night, which is why either Aunt Addy or Blake’s mum comes over on the evenings he works.

I look over to Sinead and can’t help laughing. She looks exhausted and she’s covered in icing sugar.

“What time are you meant to do to bed, by the way?” I ask, thinking I should probably try being a little bit responsible.

“I don’t really have a bed time at the weekends.”

“Okay, well, I think it’s probably best you get yourself up in the shower.”

“Yeah, me too,” she says as she wipes a bit of butter icing from her chin and licks her finger. “I’m pretty sure I’ve eaten too much sugar to be able to sleep tonight.”

“Maybe we can find a film to watch or something. What time does your...dad usually get home?” I stutter because it feels so weird calling Blake a dad. I know he’s the same age as me, but I feel far from ready to be a parent, so the fact he is—to an almost teenager—is a little weird for me.

“Late. He’ll have gone to the pub with Nate and Jason.”

“Oh, I thought he was working.”

“Yeah, but sometimes he goes to the pub afterwards.”

“Okay.” I guess I can’t argue with that, seeing as he’s a single dad who works a lot. “Go and have a shower, you,” I say, tapping her knee. “I’ll finish the kitchen and have a hot chocolate waiting for you when you get down.” That thought perks her up a bit. I’m pretty sure I shouldn’t be giving her any more sugar, but what the hell?

* * *

“Here you go,” I say as I place the two mugs of steaming chocolate, cream and mini marshmallows on the coffee table. “I didn’t think I’d find all this.”

“Dad makes them for us when it’s cold.” Of course he does. I can see him sitting here drinking this to make her happy. I bet he’s a great dad.

I sit myself down on the sofa next to Sinead and pull the blanket over my legs when she offers it to me.

We sit in a comfortable silence, sipping our chocolate and flicking through the channels. I stop when I see a movie I haven’t seen in years.

“Have you seen it?” I ask Sinead, nodding towards the TV.

“Miss Congeniality? No.”

“It was one of my favourites when I was your age. And the main guy’s hot,” I explain, but one look at Sinead’s face tells me she’s not impressed, maybe she’s going through that boys are gross phase.

“Addison…?”

“Yes, sweetheart.”

“Are you going to be Dad’s girlfriend?” I splutter but just about manage to keep the hot chocolate in my mouth.

“Um…uh… what makes you say that?”

“It’s just how he is when you’re around. He smiles like he used to. Like I remember from when Mum was here.”

My heart’s pounding as I take on board what she’s saying.

“No sweetheart, we’re just friends.”

“Okay. Well if you’re ever not just friends, I think that might be okay too.”

“Good to know. Thanks, sweetheart.”

I have mixed feelings about Sinead’s approval of whatever relationship Blake and I have. On one hand, it’s nice to know she’s aware her dad might not want to be alone, but also makes me start to picture what it might be like being with him, and that’s dangerous ground to be on. I just about contain the smile that wants to spread across my face, but instead, I focus on the film and try to put images of Blake out of my mind.

Sinead ends up going to bed before the film finishes because she can barely keep her eyes open. I was having a similar problem, so went and made myself a strong cup of coffee, knowing I was going to have to drive home once Blake appeared.

A bang brings me to, but not enough to open my eyes. I’m just drifting back off again when I feel movement next to me. My eyes fly open and I put my arms up in defence. When I look to see who it is, my gaze lands on a shining dark blue pair.

I lower my arms and sit there while his eyes run all over my face and down to the blanket I’m covered by.

“Wha’re you doin’ ‘ere?” he slurs.

“Aunt Addy was ill so I’ve been looking after Sinead. She’s in bed.”

“I’d hope so.”

“I should go,” I say, trying to pull the blanket off, but Blake cages me in with hands both sides of my waist.

“You’re beautiful, Addison.”

“And you’re drunk. Let me up, please.”

“I’m not that drunk. I know what I’m seeing,” he says, bringing one giant hand up to hold my cheek. “And I know I want you.”

The gentle hum he ignited in my body when he first appeared jumps up a notch and a steady throb starts between my thighs.

“Blake,” I say, but I have no idea where I’m going with it.

“I’m serious. I’ve never wanted anyone like I want you.”

“Okaaay.” I manage to scramble out from under the blanket and off the sofa, only to have my wrist grabbed by his giant hand. A giant hand that feels so good against my skin.

Our eyes connect once again and hold. His telling me exactly what he wants to do without words, and mine pleading: although I want what he’s offering, I know it’s not a good idea. He’s too close to Aunt Addy. I’ve just formed some kind of bond with his daughter. I can’t do that to her when it doesn’t work out. Maybe if tonight hadn’t happened I could have. But it has, and I can’t.

“This is a bad idea, Blake,” I say, tugging my wrist away.

“It would be so good though.”

Suddenly, he’s on his feet and backing me up to the wall. I go to dart to the hallway, but he once again cages me in.

He leans forward and runs his nose down the length of my neck, breathing me in. All the air in my lungs comes rushing out as I hold on to my last threads of sanity.

“Blake, we can’t.”

“You need to leave right now then.”

“What?”

“Leave. Now.”

I don’t question him this time. I duck under his arm, and grab my boots and handbag from the hallway before running from the house.

The car unlocks as I get closer and I thank God for Aunt Addy having a new one with keyless entry. I jump in and throw my bag and boots on the passenger seat. Placing my hands on the wheel I rest my head back while trying to get my breathing under control.

I’ve no idea how long I sit there, but eventually the cold starts to get to me so I press the button down to start the car while somewhat awkwardly pulling my boots on so I can drive.

I just go to look in the mirror to back off the drive when I see movement in the window. He’s stood there staring at me. Has he been there the whole time?

I look at his darkened figure for a few seconds. An apology for leaving or not staying, I’m not sure. I have no idea what I want. All I know is what’s for the best, so I pull my eyes from his and back off his drive.

Blake: Did you get home okay?

Me: Yes, thank you.

Blake: Sleep tight, baker girl. Sweet dreams xxx

I stare at that last message for the longest time. Firstly, because it reminds me that I just left boxes of cakes a client is expecting tomorrow in his kitchen, and secondly, those three kisses. I lift my fingers to my lips trying to imagine what his lips might feel like against them. Would they be as soft as they look?

* * *

Blake and Sinead turn up first thing the next morning with my cupcakes. Sinead is practically buzzing as she shows Aunt Addy and tells her all about how we made them. I think she’s still running on last night’s sugar.

Blake, on the other hand, hardly says anything. He stands in the corner of the kitchen and silently watches as Sinead chats away before she turns to see what I’m working on. My next bake is a chocolate fudge cake decorated with hearts and flowers for a teenage girl’s birthday tomorrow. I’ll make the cake in the morning; I’m spending today making all the decorations in dark, milk and white chocolate.

“Are you okay, Blake?” Aunt Addy ask when she notices his mood.

“Yeah.”

“He’s hungover,” Sinead helpfully adds, much to Blake annoyance.

“I’m fine,” he snaps.

I keep looking over to him but he avoids my eyes. I try not to think too much of it but it’s so unlike any other time we’ve been in the same room that it’s clear the issue is me.

“Excuse me,” I say, putting my flower down and leaving the room.

Blake being off shouldn’t affect me. I’m the one who keeps saying it can’t happen. I was the one who insisted on walking away last night for reasons that I still stand by, but his coldness hits me deep.

“Did something happen with you two last night? I heard you come in. It was late.”

“What? No!” I say, making myself look guilty. “Blake was just late, and drunk. He probably does have a hangover.”

“I think it was more than that.”

Thankfully, I don’t have time to sit and dissect the Blake situation with Aunt Addy because I have forty-eight cupcakes to deliver to the local community centre for a wedding. I notice the spare ones Sinead and I made haven’t been brought back, so I can only imagine how many she’s eaten this morning.

I intend to go alone to give me some thinking time about this whole Blake situation, but Aunt Addy insists on tagging along because she wants to take me to lunch to say thank you for babysitting for her last night. I tell her it’s not necessary but she won’t have it.

* * *

I want to say that it’s not because of me and what did—well, didn’t—happen at Blake’s last Friday night, but he’s kept away from Aunt Addy’s ever since the morning he dropped the cakes off. I know he’s been busy because Aunt Addy has been looking after Sinead more than usual, but that doesn’t stop me worrying that it’s because of me.

I’m also annoyed because I’ve heard diddly squat from the solicitor who’s meant to be sorting my divorce out. Every time I ring, I swear her assistant just fobs me off with some crap about having issues pulling everything together. I hired her because I was confident she’d be able to get it sorted quickly, and fairly pain-free, but it doesn’t seem to be turning out that way.

“Happy thirtieth birthday, sweetheart,” Aunt Addy sings when she comes into the living room and pulls the curtains back. I groan and roll back over. I was up late icing last night; I’m not ready to get up yet. “What, did you think I’d forget?”

I knew she wouldn’t. She’s the only person I have religiously received a birthday card from all my life, so now I’m here, I knew she’d be on top of it.

“Here,” she says, passing me a card and present.

I pull the card open to see a glittery cake looking back at me and smile. The present is a dainty silver bracelet that has a shamrock hanging from the chain with a small emerald in the centre. It’s simple and perfect: just the reminder I need of what I’m doing here. I immediately remove it from its packaging and place it over my wrist. Aunt Addy sees what I’m doing and comes to sit down next to me to help.

“It’s good to see you smile again. I’ve been worried about you the last few days.”

“I’m fine. Thank you for this—I love it.”

“It’s not much but it had your name written all over it.”

“It’s perfect.”

“Now get up and dressed. We’re going out for lunch at the hotel on the cliff and then Blake and Sinead are coming to Belfast with us tonight for dinner. I’ve booked this new restaurant that’s been getting amazing reviews. It’s one of those TV chef’s ones, you know.”

I do know. It’s been all over the local papers and internet. “Thank you. It will be amazing.” I hope so, anyway. With Blake keeping his distance, I really have no idea how it might go.

Lunch is gorgeous. We’re greeted with glasses of Champagne, followed by afternoon tea. I don’t think I’ve ever eaten so much in two hours, and by the time we leave I’m feeling seriously bloated. Thankfully, the weather’s lovely, so Aunt Addy suggests a walk, which I am more than happy with. I don’t even want to think about the number of carbs I just packed away.

“Addison, you’ve got a visitor,” Aunt Addy shouts through to the bathroom.

“Shit,” I mutter as I look down at myself dressed in only my underwear as I stand doing my hair and make up for tonight. I wait thirty seconds while my last strand of hair curls before pulling my dressing gown on and going to see who it is.

I barely know anyone here, so there aren’t many people it could be. I’m not surprised when I walk into the living room to see Cara sat on the sofa waiting for me.

“Here’s the birthday girl,” Aunt Addy sings when she spots me.

“Happy birthday,” Cara says, getting up to pull me into a hug.

“Thanks, you shouldn’t have,” I say when she hands me a bunch of flowers and a gift bag.

“It’s nothing.”

I sit down next to her and begin opening it while Aunt Addy goes to put the kettle on. I place the card and box of smellies down on the coffee table as I thank Cara for them.

“There’s something else,” she says, nodding towards the bag.

I grab it and pull out an envelope I didn’t see before, looking at her questioningly, but she just smiles before saying, “I just did it quick so I understand if it’s not right.”

More confused than ever, I rip open the envelope and slide out the single piece of paper inside.

“Oh my God,” I gasp. “It’s gorgeous, and perfect!”

“Really? I didn’t have much to go on but I had this idea while we were talking and I had to do it.”

“It’s really perfect.”

I look down at the paper in my hands and smile. Staring back at me is the most perfect logo. There’s an outline of a shamrock but it looks like flour, and then the company name on top in a script font that has the texture of hessian, I guess.

Baker Girl.

It’s utterly perfect.

I feel myself tearing up as I stare at it. This is something I’ve dreamed about for as long as I can remember. I used to watch that old couple in the bakery when I was a child and imagine it was me back there baking cakes and pastries. Once we moved and I was forced down a certain path, I thought it was unreachable. I’m almost grateful for Edward and everything between us because it led me back here to discover my dream.

“What’s that?” Aunt Addy says when she comes back in the room with a tray of tea. “Oh, that’s gorgeous.”

“You really like it? I don’t mind changing it.”

“Don’t you dare change any of it! I seriously love it.”

“We need to get you a website set up, plus social media, if you haven’t already. Then, stickers to go on all your boxes, business cards, flyers…all that kind of stuff to get the word out.”

I’m totally lost for words, so instead of replying, I lean over and pull Cara into a hug. This is beyond anything I could’ve ever imagined.

Cara only stays for about thirty minutes because we need to finish getting ready to go out. Aunt Addy tries to convince her to come with us, that she can ring and increase the table number, but Cara already has plans. A date with a guy she met in the supermarket, apparently.

“Adds, are you ready? Blake and Sinead are here,” Aunt Addy calls through to the bathroom again, where I’m finishing off getting ready. I’ve pulled my long curls around over one shoulder and put a slide behind my ear to keep them in place before sliding into my little black dress. It’s the only fancy thing I brought with me because I love it. It’s a simple black dress that fits me like a second skin. It has thick straps before dropping to a cowl neck that shows off a hint of cleavage. It’s the back I really love, though. The zip that runs from the base of my neck to the backs of my knees is really unexpected for such a demure dress. It makes it modern and edgy, different to all those other preened women I used to have to spend time with.

Slipping my classic black Louboutins onto my feet I give myself one last look in the mirror. Pleased with what I see, I pull the door open and step out. They hear me coming as I walk towards them in the living room. The second I step into the doorway, all eyes are on me, although the only ones I really see are a dark blue pair as they widen before dropping to take me in.

“Wow,” Blake says, although I’m not sure he’s aware of saying it as he takes his fill.

Aunt Addy and Sinead both smile at him before bringing their eyes back to me.

“You look gorgeous, sweetheart.”

“Thanks. I love your outfit, Sinead,” I say, complimenting her black and white polka dot style prom dress.

“Thank you,” she beams.

“Great accessories too,” I add, noting her matching red pumps and bag. I’m pretty sure her smile couldn’t be any wider.

“Are we ready to go then?” Aunt Addy asks, but Blake is still away with the fairies.

“I just need to put my jewellery on.” I walk over to my stuff behind the sofa and locate my necklace and earrings. I stand in front of the mirror and pop the simple diamond studs into my ears before going to put the chain around my neck.

“Let me,” I hear from behind me. I look up and my eyes lock onto his.

When he holds his hand out I pass him my necklace and pull my hair up out of the way. He laces his hands through the gap I’ve left before gently placing the single solitaire diamond against my chest. When he moves back to do it up, his fingers brush the skin of my neck and goosebumps race across my skin. Our eyes connect again in the mirror, his darkening the longer we’re stood there.

“Do you need me to do it, Dad?” Sinead offers when she realises it’s taking too long.

Blake clears his throat and breaks his gaze from mine before saying he’s got it.

Although we’re going in Aunt Addy’s car so she can drive back, Blake insists on driving to Belfast and I get pushed into the front seat so Sinead can chat to her nan about school on the journey.

In contrast to the endless chatter in the back of the car, the front remains relatively silent. I feel his eyes flick over to me every few minutes, but I fight to keep my eyes ahead and not engage with him. My body’s humming just being this close to him but I can’t forget that his daughter is sat mere feet away.

When Sinead starts getting even more excited about whatever it is she’s telling Aunt Addy, Blake decides to talk.

“You look beautiful,” he says quietly.

“Thank you,” I whisper back, blushing profusely. I look to my left, attempting to hide my reaction.

“I’m sorry about what happened before. I was drunk and then hungover, and ashamed of my behaviour,” he says.

“It’s fine. I knew it was the drink talking.”

“It might have been the drink making me so forward, but it was all true.”

My words get stuck in my throat and I thank the heavens when Sinead asks Blake a question and puts an end to our inappropriate conversation.