I stood in the doorway of the bedroom while Kyle packed his bags.
“I just need some space,” he said as he threw his clothes haphazardly into his large Nike bag.
“Does this have anything to do with that whore you met at Zoe’s the other night?”
“Elle, come on; I told you nothing happened.”
I rolled my eyes at him. “You tell me a lot of things, Kyle.”
He threw the last of his clothes into his Nike bag and turned around to face me. “We both knew we were heading for this; things have been rocky for a while now, and you know why.”
“Rocky for you because you’re searching for something that doesn’t exist.”
He let out a heavy sigh. “I’m sorry, Elle. I just can’t do this anymore.”
I followed him to the small space we called the living room as he dropped his bag on the floor. He reached into his jeans pocket and threw some money on the table. “This is for the next couple of months, so you can pay the rent.” He kissed me on my forehead and headed for the door.
I crossed my arms and stared at him. “I don’t want your money; I want you to stay. Please, Kyle. Don’t give up on us.”
I was now the most pathetic person in the world, begging my douchebag boyfriend to stay; not because I thought I was in love with him, but because I was afraid of being alone, and being alone was something that was all too familiar to me.
He picked up his bag from the ground and slung it over his shoulder. “Take care, Elle.” And just like that, he walked out. I stood in the middle of the living room and looked at the closed door as tears escaped my eyes.
Kyle and I had been together since sophomore year of college. We both attended Michigan State University and met at a frat party when he was a Delta Sigma Phi. Kyle was a good-looking guy with his six-foot stature and medium build. He wasn’t exactly eye candy, but he was cute. He always kept his jet black hair perfectly combed, and his dark brown eyes reminded me of one of my favorite things in the world—chocolate. Kyle was a person whose presence lit up the room. His charm and romance was what had swept me off my feet. He studied Accounting, while I studied Art. It wasn’t too long after we graduated that his cousin got him a job at the large accounting firm where he was employed. This was how we ended up moving from Michigan to New York. Kyle worked full-time as an accountant and made pretty decent money, so I was able to take on a part-time job at a record company and finish painting the pictures that I promised the art gallery.
We rented a one-bedroom apartment that was small, but it had been our home for the past year, and it made us happy—at least I thought it did. I took my teary-eyed self and sat on the couch, curled in a ball, and cried myself to sleep.
I hadn’t been sleeping long when I was startled by a knock on the door. I sat up and looked around the room, eyes swollen and red.
“Elle, are you in there?” I heard a familiar voice say as she pounded on the door. I got up from the couch and stumbled to open the door. Peyton always seemed to know when I needed her most. She threw her hands up in the air.
“Elle, it’s about time. I thought I was going to have to break down the door.” She put her arms around me and hugged me tight. I motioned for her to come in as she pushed her way through and set a large brown bag on the table.
“I come bearing douchebag boyfriend food.” She smiled as she rummaged through the bag. She removed the boxes of Chinese food and set them on the table.
“We have Mongolian beef, lettuce wraps, chicken fried rice, wonton soup, and chocolate ice cream for dessert.”
Her grin went from ear to ear, but it quickly fell as I dropped my head and curled back up on my couch. Peyton sighed heavily as she walked over and sat next to me.
“Kyle text-messaged me and said he left. He wanted me to come over to check on you and make sure you were okay.”
I lifted my head from my arms. Who the fuck did he think he was, sending my best friend over to see if I was okay? I thought as anger burned inside me.
“He said he left because of irreconcilable differences.”
“What are we—married?” I growled.
Peyton gave me a sympathetic smile and walked to the kitchen to grab plates and silverware for the food sitting on the table. I couldn’t stop thinking about Kyle and how he just left. We were never apart for more than a couple of days, and now we’d be apart forever. Once again, I was alone. I knew why he decided to leave, and for that reason, I hated him. I gave him every opportunity to tell me the truth, but he couldn’t even look me in the eye and do that. He was a coward, and I had no room in my life for cowards. Even though I felt sick to my stomach, I got up and made my way to the table as Peyton put some food on my plate.
“Listen, Elle, Kyle’s a douchebag, and I’m sorry you wasted the last four years of your life with him. You need to focus on something else. You need to finish your paintings and get them over to the art gallery so that people can find out who Ellery Lane truly is,” she said, waving her fork around. I smiled because I knew she was right; if there was one way that I could escape the hurt and loneliness, it was through my paintings. She reached over, put her arm around me, and gave me a squeeze. “Don’t worry; I’ll be here for you.”
I met Peyton at the art gallery the day I stopped by to talk to the owner about displaying my paintings. The minute she asked, “May I help you?” we clicked, and we’d been best friends ever since. One thing about Peyton was her personality; it was way bigger than her five-foot-two, size zero body. She always sported the perfect look with her long, straight brown hair and perfectly placed makeup that enhanced her bright blue eyes. I didn’t think I’d ever seen her dress in a pair of sweatpants. For her, it was all about style with skirts and cute little tops. There wasn’t a shortage of guys when Peyton was around. They were always flirting with her, but she had yet to find the perfect man to give her heart to.
I didn’t feel like eating, but I knew I had to appease Peyton, or she wouldn’t leave me alone.
“Do you want me to stay with you tonight?”
I set my fork down. “Nah, I just want to be alone. I think I’ll go take a bath.”
I got up from the table and headed to the bathroom. I turned the water on and poured a capful of bubble bath in its stream. I twisted my long, blonde hair up and clipped it to prevent it from getting wet. I climbed into the bubble-filled bathtub and slid down until my head was resting on the bath pillow behind me. I lay there, closed my eyes, and tried to think of a plan, but I was too grief-stricken, and I needed the proper amount of time to wallow in self-pity before moving on with my life as a single female.
By the time I got out of the bathtub, Peyton had everything cleaned up. She left me a text message saying, “Elle, get some rest and call me if you need anything. I’ll call you tomorrow. Love you always.”
I smiled, as Peyton was about the only family that I had left. My mother passed away from cancer when I was six, and my father died right before my eighteenth birthday. I had an aunt and uncle back in Michigan, but I hadn’t seen or heard from them since my dad died. I’d always considered Kyle’s parents as family, but now that we’d broken up, it would be more than awkward to talk to them.
After I made sure the door was locked, I turned off the lights and snuggled in my bed, burying my head under the covers to escape the reality of my life—at least for tonight.