Jack
SITTING BACKSTAGE, WARMING up on my practice pad, I was struck with how comfortable I felt. All my initial fears and anxiety about the tour were completely gone and I was actually looking forward to playing. It was opening night and less than two hours until show time.
Because Lucy knew us so well, and because she was a genius, she knew we needed to ease back into the insanity that goes along with a tour, so she’d been very careful to limit press interviews and fan meet and greets before the shows. This gave us a little more time to relax and focus before hitting the stage—not that I was doing either.
Hadley was currently in our dressing room speaking with Lucy about the concessions’ contract with the venue, but I couldn’t focus on her words—only her mouth. I wanted that mouth on mine; I wanted it to kiss my body, to take the fullness of my cock into it. I shifted in my seat, and continued to tap away on my practice pad as she walked toward me.
“Do you warm up every time before you… play?” she asked in a whisper as she passed by.
I winked. “I always like to warm things up when I have the time.”
She walked away and I tried to put her out of my mind… if only for the moment. I had to focus if I was going to get through tonight in one piece. Rex was the nicest guy in the world, but he always ran a tight ship on stage. Rex has to pull triple duty when we play live. He’s singing, playing bass, and the most consistently engaged with the audience. For him to do what he does every night he needed Robbie and me to be on the money at all times.
Rex always heard everything and had his head on a swivel. The last thing any of us wanted to see on stage was what Robbie and I called the ‘death ray.’ I hated letting Rex down, and if I fucked up bad enough for him to shoot me the death ray, it would mean I fucked up royally.
On our last tour, I saw the death ray every night… multiple times a show. I was a strung-out mess and could barely function, let alone play well. I felt gratitude to be sitting backstage with my band again, because I didn’t think it would ever happen.
How often does someone a second chance?
As I continued to warm up my hands, my thoughts were interrupted by the sound of singing—beautiful singing, in four-part harmony, coming from the adjoining dressing room. Roses for Anna was about to go on, so I figured they must be warming up.
A hush came over our dressing room as their voices rose, and I leaned back in my chair quietly unlocking and opening the door in the shared wall. The sound that poured from their room instantly gave me chills. This was music, real music, sung by young men who believed in its power. We waited for them to finish, in complete, stunned silence, and erupted into applause when they were done. The band, who were gathered together in a tight circle, spun around in surprise.
“Awww, come on man, you guys are too much,” their lead singer Zeke said, bowing to his newly found audience. “Thank you.”
I locked eyes with Bam, smiled and waved him over. I saw him look over at Lucy and smile shyly before making his way into our dressing room.
“Hey Jack, how’s it goin’?”
I stood up and extended my hand. “Hey man, that sounded amazing. Do you guys do that shit on stage?”
“The circle of fear?” he asked.
“The what?”
“That’s what we call it. It’s our pre-show ritual,” he explained. “It’s how we connect before we go on stage.”
“Well, you should bring that on stage with you.”
Bam smiled wide and thanked me. I wished him a good show and returned to my warm up. I was looking forward to seeing Roses for Anna play, but didn’t say so. I knew the guy looked up to me and didn’t want to rattle his brain any more than it probably was. As an opening band, you had to play in front of your idols all the time, and it can be hell.
Hadley circled back into the room one last time to make sure all of her guys were ready to go. Before she left the room, she shot me a sly grin that caused a familiar buzz and I was struck with a thought: Hadley Simon was quickly becoming my new drug of choice.
* * *
Holy shit, these guys can play!
“They’re pretty good,” I said, leaning in close to Hadley. I could smell her, and it was driving me insane.
“Pretty good?” She raised both eyebrows. “I think the word you’re looking for is amazing.”
“Yeah, alright.” I smiled, but looked away before anyone spotted us staring for too long. “I should… I…”
“Get going?” Hadley teased.
I mouthed, “I’ll see you later,” and went off to join my bandmates, who had gathered to watch the show from the other side of the stage.
“Well, they’re certainly singing for their supper, aren’t they?” Rex asked.
“They’re fucking great!” I agreed.
“Yup.”
“We’re going to have to kick some major ass going on after these guys every night,” Robbie said.
Rex and I turned toward one another.
“Yup,” Rex said again.
I loved outdoor summer shows. Tonight, we were playing what the music industry calls a ‘shed,’ which are corporate owned amphitheaters that seat around fifteen to twenty thousand people. This one was located in southern Washington, just outside of Portland, Oregon and was sold out. Roses for Anna was currently playing to a half-filled venue, but I had a feeling as word got out among our fans, that wouldn’t be the case for long.
“Mr. Henry.” I felt a hand tap my shoulder and turned to see a young man with a bright yellow vest and a walkie-talkie. “You have an urgent call holding for you in the business office, can you follow me sir?”
“A call? What’s this about?” I asked.
“I’m not sure sir, I was just asked to come and get you.”
“I’m in the middle of watching a show, man, can it wait?”
“I was told to tell you the call is from Tabitha, and that it’s urgent.”
“I don’t know anyone named… wait, did she say Tabitha or Tabeetha?” I asked.
“Sorry sir, yes it was Tabeetha.”
Rex and Robbie looked at me puzzled.
“Sorry guys, I’ve gotta take this.”
“Who’s Tabeetha?” Rex asked.
I began following my guide and yelled out, “She’s my… aunt. She’s… very sick. I’ll catch up with you guys in a bit.”
We made our way to the offices and I was led to a small windowless room.
“Here you are, sir, your call is waiting inside,” my guide said, his young face turning beet red.
“Thanks, man,” I said and palmed him a twenty.
I opened the door and Hadley was sitting on top of an old desk. Sitting next to her was a small lamp that provided the only light in the room.
I grinned. “I was told I had a call from Tabeetha.”
“Oh, I’m sorry. There must have been some sort of mistake. There’s no phone in here, just… me.”
Hadley luring me into her little trap was too much. I should have been focusing on the show, but all I could see was Hadley. Everything else around us was in darkness, but I could see her in the light, and that was all that mattered right now. I smiled slowly. “I like you better.”
She giggled, reaching for me and tugging me forward. “I just need a little somethin’ to tide me over.”
“You want me to fuck you in the business office?” I challenged. “Kinky.”
“No! Gross. Public isn’t my style, but I’d be really happy with a little necking time.”
I chuckled. “Just how old are you?”
“Ninety-four next month. I look good, huh?”
“So good.” I leaned down and kissed her gently. “You do okay on the bus?”
She nodded. “Bam was missing Lucy though.”
“Yeah, she was missin’ him too.”
“I told him I’d be willing to switch with her… you know, take one for the team.”
I stroked her neck. “Take one for the team, huh?”
She smiled and nodded. “I figured she and I are doing the same job, so we can support both bands. Is that okay?”
“It poses a little problem for me.”
“Crap,” she whispered, dropping her gaze to the floor. “I should have talked to you about it. I’m really sorry, Jack.”
I lifted her chin and kissed her again. “Not mad about it, Hadley… just gonna make it harder for me not to drag you into the tiny bathroom and fuck you senseless.”
“I didn’t really think about that.” She licked her lips and smiled. “Can you control yourself?”
“Considering you’ll be in my hotel bed whenever possible.”
“I can’t be in your bed every night. Someone will see.”
I kissed her again, sliding my hand under her shirt and tugging her bra down in order to roll her nipple between my fingers.
She arched into my touch. “Jack.”
“Yeah, baby?” I whispered, leaning down to kiss her again.
“God, that feels so good.”
I removed my hand and she whimpered.
“You gonna sleep with me every night you can?” I challenged.
She wrinkled her nose. “Maybe.”
I fixed her bra and shirt and stepped back. “Yeah?”
“Come back,” she said with a groan.
“You gonna sleep with me every night?” I repeated.
She rolled her eyes. “Fine. Yes, evil one, I will.”
I grinned and closed the distance between us again. “Good answer.”
She stroked my beard. “FYI, I don’t really like blackmail.”
I chuckled. “Noted.”
“But I like what you were just doing.”
“I’ll make it up to you tonight and do that again.”
She grinned, kissing me gently. “FYI, I like that kind of apology.”
“Noted.” I kissed her quickly one last time. “Alright, sweet face, we really do have to go before someone notices we’re both missing. I’m sure my band is anxiously awaiting an update on the health status of my dear aunt Tabeetha.”
Hadley burst into laughter and as I held her, I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so happy and at peace.
* * *
“Fuck! Fuck! Fuck!” I couldn’t remember the last time I’d been so panicked and full of fear. My ears were ringing from the near-deafening screeching that had shot through my in-ear monitors moments earlier. “What the fuck, Teddy?”
“They’re trying to figure out what’s going on, boss!” Teddy yelled back.
Back in the day, musicians only had giant speakers on the floor and to sides of the stage to hear ourselves. It was a primitive solution that did damage to the hearing of many great players and singers. Over ten years ago, in-ear monitoring had become the industry standard, allowing musicians to have custom molded, super high-quality ear buds made in order to hear themselves much better, at significantly lower volume. Apparently, our monitoring system had some bugs to be worked out, and just three minutes before we were to start playing, I found myself unable to hear anything but eardrum-crushing noise.
“Tell them to figure it out fast!”
I looked over at Rex and his death ray was locked on several members of the band’s sound crew, who were currently in a state of mild panic.
I heard one of them call out, “We’re rebooting the monitoring desk now.”
Our show opened with a three-minute video piece that served as a snap shot of the band’s history. It was filled with old photos, video clips, soundbites and reminders of our past. We were about one minute from when I was to count off the first song, and the digital mixing board that controlled the band’s entire monitor feed was being powered back up after a full shut down.
“This’d better fuckin’ work or we’re in for a long night,” Robbie said.
I looked to my left and awaited the all clear sign from the monitor station. There was nothing like last minute technical chaos to get the adrenaline pumping. I needed to slow down my breathing and mentally clear myself or I’d go blazing into the first song way too fast.
I glanced to my right and saw Hadley standing with Lucy, a look of concern on her face. She must have seen me pull my in-ears out and could clearly see we were having major technical issues.
I smiled and mouthed, “I’m okay,” just in time to get the thumbs up from our monitoring engineer. This was it. After years of absolute silence, RatHound was about to make a very big noise.
I heard the crescendo of the opening video’s music and quickly popped my in-ears back in just before the massive curtain that had been hiding us from the audience dropped. I took a deep breath, steadied myself. Much like Dorothy, I clicked my sticks together a few times and found myself going back home.