LLOYD CALLED HER INTO his office a few weeks later. Busily writing, he didn’t even glance up. “I had a call about a new building up towards Medford, Oregon. It’s three hours from here. Want to come? We’ll stay overnight, on the company, of course. It would be next Tuesday. You can let me know later.”

Julia’s heart jumped. Lloyd’s invitation sounded so grown-up, like something her mom or dad would have done for their jobs. Tracy worked for a large corporation that sold software systems and her dad often went out of town to set up new computer systems for corporations. Here she was. About to go away on business. She kept the enthusiasm out of her voice as she said, “I could fit that into my schedule.”

He finally glanced up and nodded. There was neither glee nor unhappiness on his face. “Good. Good. We’ll plan on leaving here at say, nine? We have to meet with the owner at the site at two and then he wants to go to dinner to discuss his own ideas and thoughts, and I’m sure, some general costs. That work for you?”

“That works. Thank you.”

“Thank you, Julia. You’ve turned out to be surprisingly proficient.”

His head had already dropped back down, concentrating on whatever he was working on. What did he mean? What was she doing in her job that he found surprising? Or was he surprised she was so helpful? Wasn’t that the entire goal of her damn job? She shrugged as she stepped out. Going back to her office, she tackled the piles of submittals and correspondence that was waiting. At least she was starting to earn her salary.

And now she was going on a business trip! The thought kept a smile floating over her face at the pleasure of feeling like she’d accomplished something real. Moved forward on her journey towards deserving this job.

The next few days flew by as Julia prepared for the Tuesday trip. The morning of the departure, she needed to swing by Chris’s site before she went to the office. She entered the shack and he swung around, smiling with pleasure. “Ju-Ju-Bee. What brings you here at the crack of a butt?” He grinned, wagging his eyebrows. Since the night of dinner at her house, a distinct shift in their relationship had occurred. From coworkers who naturally got along and treated each other with respect, they were now jovial, kidding, and playfully abusive to each other, but only in the best way possible. Since that night, she left each encounter with Chris either grinning from ear-to-ear, because she bested him in a verbal match, or scowling because she lost. They didn’t do it in front of any other workers. If a laborer, subcontractor, or Lloyd were around, they were polite, and cool in how they interacted. They were both careful to keep it all about work while on the sly, they would often exchange secret smiles and eye locks of understanding. It was fun for Julia. Truthfully, her first two years of high school had more or less passed her by. There were no large groups of peers for Julia. She never had a clique or close group to hang out with. She was never popular enough to be sought after. She was, in fact, usually the odd girl out. Reserved, cool, with a hands-off warning, most teenagers didn’t know how to get past her solid wall of isolation. Then, she’d homeschooled her junior and senior years. Her social life was nonexistent. In fact it was dominated by her siblings and their kids. That’s who she hung out with and spent all her spare time around.

But somehow, Chris had become her friend. Looking at him, Julia could only shake her head in wonder. How could this huge, giant brute of a man manage to get her personality? And bond with her? And kid with her? And like her? She wasn’t wrong. She was sure of it, which she rarely was, but in this case, she had no doubt that Chris liked her. He also found her clever, challenging, amusing, and fun. Fun. Who knew Julia could be fun? It was the last word most people would have ever associated with her.

Unfortunately however, he began calling her that ridiculous nickname. It was bad enough having to contend with Ju-Ju-Bee for most of her life. Chris quickly picked up on it at the family party.

“Christopher. Don’t call me that,” she admonished him, placing her hands on her hips.

He grinned maniacally at her. Lacking an articulate, witty or chiding response, she was relegated to using his full name. As if that could put him in his place.

He spread his hands out flat and asked, “So what are you doing here, Ju-Ju-Bee?”

Choosing to ignore his teasing, she hoped he’d soon lose interest in doing it. “I won’t be here today and tomorrow so I wanted to get these to you before I take off.”

His eyebrows shot up with surprise and curiosity. Pulling his attention from the plans in front of him, he lifted his face up. “Where are you going? I didn’t know you were taking time off.”

“I’m not. It’s a business trip. Lloyd has a walk-through in Medford for a new dental office and he asked me to go along. It’s an overnight trip. If you need anything while I’m away, direct it towards the office and they’ll find someone else to help you.”

Chris puckered his lips up before he scowled. It was so unlike him when a deep, menacing, black cloud seemed to change his mood. “You’re just mentioning it to me now? What the fuck does he need you there for?”

Julia stepped back. Fuck? She’d never heard Chris use that kind of tone before and certainly not to swear at her while he did so. Gone was the teasing and calling her Ju-Ju-Bee. The mild flirting and what she might have even suspected was real friendship. “Because I take good notes and I save him from doing a lot of the legwork for the budgets and proposals he writes. Granted, Chris, it’s not important work like what you and Lloyd do, but it is something valuable and necessary to the business. Plus, I’m learning more and someday it will be important. Why? Are you miffed that he didn’t take you? His super star? His fast-rising and favorite employee?”

Chris frowned. “What are you talking about? I am not.”

“Ha. As if. He’s always gushing about you. Telling me how clever you are. How quick you learn things. Haven’t you noticed how much time he spends here? Always working directly with you? Personally teaching you things, taking the extra time to show you the stuff on the plans? Don’t tell me you don’t notice all that. I see how he interacts with all his other field employees and he takes half as much interest in them. In fact, he’s kind of a dick to most of them. He gets pretty short-tempered and annoyed if they don’t know what they are doing or talking about. But when you don’t know something, he turns all mentor-like and shows you how to do it. Not his normal behavior. Not even with me.”

“Well, it certainly makes more sense to take the field rep along with him, since he’s the one who most likely would oversee the physical field work. The only person who could give him feasible, constructive opinions to satisfy the needs of the owner or developer. Not a glorified secretary running back and forth. Think about it, Julia. Think about the real reason why he asked you to go on an overnight business trip with him.”

She stepped back. Gripping the back of one of the chairs, her jaw dropped. Chris had never spoken like that to her before. He was all but roaring his disapproval of her. “That’s a disgusting thing to say to me.”

“Is it? Do you think you hold any job security here? Do you ever stop and wonder why everyone assumes you’re only here to fetch their coffee? Or why they were so slow to start accepting your help? Do you think it’s because they aren’t that busy? Let me tell you every single superintendent in this company is absolutely slammed with work. We can’t even see straight. But did any of them—besides me—even try to utilize your help at first? As a conduit to avoid dealing with our overworked and unhelpful project managers? No. Duh. It’s because they know you don’t hold any real position in Cartwright Construction. You are Lloyd’s assistant. Think about it. Think what that means. Why didn’t it matter that you had no skills, nothing, no qualifications for being his assistant? No college degree. No field experience. No office experience. Think, Julia. Why would Lloyd hire pretty, young, and oh-so-blonde, Julia? Think why that is.”

She stared at him, truly becoming horrified. Her eyes grew huge. He was snarling at her now. Standing up, his bulk seemed even larger and the anger that she could see pulsating in his neck made him more intimidating than ever. His bunched-up muscles were tightly contracted as he hunched his shoulders, crossing his arms in palpable rage, making the jugular vein in his neck throb. She swallowed, staring at him in horror, letting his words sink in. Pretty. Young. Blonde. So what? What was that supposed to mean to her?

“That’s disgusting. I work for Lloyd. And with you. Nothing more. How dare you infer such terrible things about me? How dare you?! You overgrown, muscle-bound jerk.” She had to slide the chair back and suck in a deep breath as she held back her tears. “Nice. Real nice, Chris.” Spinning on her heel, she walked out of there. She kept her pace at a swift clip, just shy of jogging. Tears threatened to spill over her eyelids. She refused to let them. NO! She wasn’t going to run from a job site, crying like a little girl because Chris said some mean things to her and hurt her feelings. No, he had humiliated her. She refused to be that woman.

Nope.

But his words filled her brain like heavy lead, sinking in further, hitting her stomach and tightening it and sickening her.

Was it all true?

She shut her eyes. Could it be true? Yes. It could be. All of it made sense. All of it… hurt. She tightened her hands over the steering wheel. It hurt more than she ever realized to learn that Lloyd considered her a blonde, bimbo slut, and he hired her to do what? Be Lloyd’s eye candy? Why? What point was there in giving her a fake position in his company?

She recalled some field workers who were slow to employ her help or assign her any tasks, but now they did. Didn’t that mean something? Was Chris implying they didn’t take her seriously because they thought she was simply there to look pretty?

She couldn’t even fill the role of the blonde bimbo. No one would have chosen her if that’s what they were seeking. She was too reserved. Prim and proper. For God’s sake. Her body was modestly covered from her neck to her knees during the interview. She didn’t simper or preen. She didn’t stroke Lloyd’s ego. How could he expect her to perform if that was what he wanted all along?

Whatever his motives, a knot formed in her stomach and began to climb up her throat. What seemed like such an amazing opportunity now felt sordid and slimy. She debated whether she should have just gone home and not shown up, but that was the old Julia. The cowardly Julia. The Julia that Lloyd first hired. Since then, she addressed tables full of men and exceeded their low expectations, coming to find out they were much lower than she ever dreamed. She straightened her back. Fuck it. She did her job well now. She fulfilled all of her duties. She was still learning, but progressing quite well. She proved herself to be a valuable employee. Maybe not so much in the beginning, which was probably why the other workers believed she was originally hired for her young blonde good looks. Maybe. But now? She was using her brains and becoming a valuable asset to Lloyd, the project managers and all the superintendents. Apparently, she turned a fake position into a real one. A functioning one. A necessary one. She clamped her jaw. Fuck Chris Vaughn. He was wrong. He wasn’t correct about her.

She tried to ignore the stab of pain. Some friend he failed to be.

****

“Julia!” Chris yelled after her but she didn’t stop, flinch, or glance back. He doubted she even heard him. Wilting in the doorway, he could only wonder what had he done? The complete opposite of what he meant or wanted to do. He hurt her. He ridiculed and embarrassed her. He horrified her. And he told her something she never even suspected. Judging by her facial expression, she had no idea about Lloyd’s MO.

He turned and slammed the door, berating himself, cursing, and wanting to smash his fist into his own face. Lifting a chair up, he slammed it against the wall. Staring with rage at the spot where the chair struck the wood, he noticed it left a small dent and splintered. Luckily, the walls were merely plywood, nothing fancy. Nothing anyone might notice had been damaged. It was so unlike Chris to lose his temper. What was he doing? Never prone to outbursts, tantrums, or throwing inanimate objects, he felt chagrinned. He was glad no one could see him when he stepped forward to grab the chair before tucking it neatly back under the table, and patting it as if he were telling it to stay put.

What did he just do to Julia? Something he hadn’t meant to.

But seeing her so happy, he instantly thought her jovial mood was because of him. His mood and spirits certainly lifted at the mere sight of her. Her long, blonde hair, tucked back in a low ponytail, and her large, deep, black eyes that seemed cool until the moment she released a smile never failed to fill him with joy. She was always so neutral and stone-faced until something engaged her. Chris liked watching her light up before smiling. It wasn’t an automatic reaction for Julia Lindstrom. Whenever Chris managed to make her smile, he felt like he’d conquered a new world.

God help him… He had a raging crush on Julia Lindstrom that started the very first day he met her. It practically exploded on the day he met her family. Seeing her in her natural element amongst the people with whom she felt the most comfortable was both enlightening and fun. The reserved, serious, cool image that she portrayed at work extended to her family. It turned out to be her general demeanor. But he also detected a sarcastic edge that emerged once she relaxed. It didn’t match the rest of her, or her sweet, girl-next-door looks. That saccharine picture was not her at all, however. Julia never tried to please anyone. She also refused to feed any man or woman’s ego. Chris enjoyed her family, from her sisters and brothers-in-law to her parents, aunt and uncle, and grandparents. Observing all the tiny imperfections that he saw only made him like them even more.

Her family was the antithesis of his. His merely consisted of his mom and cat. Julia was teasing him, but saying the exact truth.

He grew up without the teasing, caring, snooping, and gossiping of any cousins or siblings. Siblings. God, he only wished he had those. Even now. Even stepsiblings, or step cousins once removed, or whatever official label belonged to them.

Since that night, Julia seemed much warmer and more animated towards him. They enjoyed a sense of real comfort and a true friendship. But he threw that out as if it were no more than the droppings from his cat’s litter box. He never meant to drive her away. He valued her friendship greatly and wanted her to continue liking him. He hated himself for doing what he just did. Alienating her. Hurting her. Making her feel stupid and small and common, like she wasn’t important. When in truth, she had become the most important factor in his life. Maybe the most important person he ever met. And now he’d all but driven a stake through the heart of their relationship.

He never expected her to say that she and Lloyd were going away together. Overnight. In a hotel. Together. Fuck. The subsequent images of her and Lloyd that immediately ravaged his brain flipped him into a jealous rage. Never, not once, had he come close to such an all-consuming, hateful feeling. He never considered himself the jealous type. Or experienced a twinge of it in his life. Never in high school. Never in all the times since he’d been dating women. Never. He usually sat back and smiled with amusement if men showed more interest than appropriate in anyone he was dating. It made him proud. Like, yeah. The woman was his girlfriend, not theirs. He was usually more than secure in his manliness. His ego didn’t need to be stroked; it was healthy enough. Always confident, jealousy never crossed his mind. Not even once.

Now, he had yelled at her, an innocent woman who was merely telling him her itinerary. He yelled at her and squashed all of her confidence. Then he threw a damn chair at the wall.

He was well aware of his brute strength. Like a full-grown chimpanzee, he was capable of doing far more damage than any average man, so he always proceeded carefully. He didn’t let his temper talk for him, even if he were angry at anyone. Let alone an innocent, inanimate chair.

He sat down, leaning his head back and resisting the urge to bang it a few times against the hard wall. What had he done? Now, she’d never talk to him again. Or want to work with him. Or let him tease her. Or carry on their innocuous banter. Or surprise him by showing up at a random moment. God, how he loved all of that during the last few months. The days were all new, laced with an unprecedented magic because he knew at any moment, Julia Lindstrom could come by. Eagerly anticipating the possibility, he popped out of bed at five o’clock, feeling rested, energized, and pumped up. He had to get to work by six. Julia was the one who put a spring in his step as he whistled away.

Yeah, all because of a woman. But not just any woman.

Julia Lindstrom wasn’t just like anyone.

He never felt anything like the way he did around her. It was strong and real and wonderful. But now? He only felt bad, mean, and jealous. Would she ever forgive him? Why should she?

He suffered throughout the rest of the day, his surliness evident to all he encountered. He gave up when he freaked out on a driver who was delivering pallets of landscaping brick. They planned to install a long, retaining wall on the south end of the property to contain the parking lot. Chris mercilessly berated the young, obviously inexperienced driver after four failed attempts to pull the flatbed semi-truck in straight. Chris climbed into his truck, dejected and disgusted with himself. His stomach churned as he tried to avoid picturing what Julia might have been doing right then. He began wondering where she was. But at least, he knew with whom. Lloyd. Lloyd, his father. His dad. His flesh and blood. Fuck.

Entering his mom’s apartment without a knock or hello, Chris grabbed a beer and flopped down on her white couch. His mother, at barely five-foot-one, weighed all of a hundred-and-five pounds. She curled up on the edge of the opposite couch and frowned at him. “Something wrong, Chrissy?”

He rolled his eyes, chugging the beer and wiping his mouth with the back of his hand. Thank God, Julia never knew that nickname. She’d have had a field day using it to irritate him. Not now, though. She probably wouldn’t even bother to comment if she heard it. His stomach knotted in disappointment.

“Hey, Chris, what’s wrong?” Tully, his mom, asked. She began straightening up and leaning forward to grab the TV remote after watching the nightly news. Clicking the TV off, she turned to him. He sighed. No fooling her. She wouldn’t leave him alone until he told her. Which was why he came there.

“I fucked up.” He drank more.

She winced. He wasn’t allowed to talk that way in front of her and usually didn’t. But right now, he knew of no other word to describe it.

“Did you mess something up with the new building?” Tully was well aware that he worked for a general contractor, but Chris only referred to it as CGC, and never told her what the initials stood for: Cartwright General Contractors. Tully had no clue it belonged to Lloyd Cartwright.

“No. No, I wish. That, I could fix. It’s just a building.”

She nodded and said, “Ah.”

“What? Ah?”

“It’s a woman.” He scowled at her and she gave him a look. “What did you do?”

“Told her something mean. Just to make her feel bad.”

Her eyebrows jerked upwards. “That’s not like you. She must have done something to hurt you.”

“Not knowingly.”

“Start from the beginning, son.”

“I like this woman and we both work together. She works as an assistant and is mostly in the office. Well, she’s going away with the boss and… and I think he could have dishonorable intentions towards her. You know what I mean…”

“You mean, the boss wants to bang his assistant? Not so unusual, Chris. And honey, you say it as if you only harbor noble intentions, huh? Get real.”

He glared at his attractive, petite, blonde-haired mother. She was forty-eight but looked a decade or more younger. His friends always tried to hit on her even when they were barely in their twenties. She was small, beautiful, and well-dressed. Most people thought she was his older sister and not his mother. But she was his mother. And he considered her the best one in the world. She never blew sunshine where it don’t shine or sugarcoated anything. Even about him. He frowned when he noticed that she kind of resembled Julia. Huh. Gross. Shuddering, he banished the thought. He wasn’t interested in his mother’s type.

“I want…”

“To have sex with her?” Her eyebrows rose.

“Yeah, and that’s gross, Mom. You should be horrified at hearing this.” He evil-eyed her. “But I also have a relationship with her. And right now, I’d settle for a friendship. But I freaking blew up at her when she told me she was going away on business with the boss. I know what kind of business he means. He’s going to seduce her. He has a long track record of doing it in the past, and he must be doing something right because he’s usually successful.”

“What did you tell her?”

Chris sighed, burning up with shame. His mother would not like hearing this part. “I—I told her she was hired for a fake position. Everyone knew she was strictly there to serve the boss’s needs and I said that’s why no one would work with her at first. But Mom, how could she not know? She had no resume and was hired without any prior education or experience. She had to realize what was going on, right?”

Tully leaned across the distance and smacked him on the shoulder. “Chris! You should be ashamed.”

He winced at her tone. She did not conceal her disappointment. “I know. I know. It was so bad. And so mean. And I know I hurt her. Really hurt her. I—I even threw a chair.”

“At her?” Tully’s eyes widened in horror.

“No. I’d never do that.”

“While she was there?” Tully frowned.

“No. After she left.”

Tully was quiet. Chris hated to lose his temper so he seldom did. Tully finally understood his state of sorrow and she nodded. “You didn’t tell her about your feelings?”

Reacting with alarm, Chris jerked his head back. “No. Of course not. She has no idea.”

“Then try to imagine how confused she was. Walking in there to inform you of her absence and then you react by hurling undeserved personal attacks and insults.”

He dropped his head. His stomach was churning. “I know. I know. It’s unacceptable.”

“It sure is. And you need to tell her that. Now. You can’t wuss out, not after what you said to her. She needs to know why you reacted so severely to her news. Whether your feelings are welcome or not, and valid to her or not, you owe her an explanation.”

“I doubt she feels the same as I do.”

“So what?” Tully’s eyebrow rose.

Chris nodded, ashamed. “I know,” he mumbled. “What if she sleeps with this guy?”

Tully shrugged. “What if she does? It might be a quick fling. A single event or the start of a new relationship and even a future marriage. Who knows what will happen? It doesn’t taint her, for God’s sake, Chris. Tell her how you feel first, so she has all the information she should have. But most of all, you must apologize. You can’t shame a woman because she doesn’t have the same feelings for you. That’s your problem, Chris. Not hers. She doesn’t owe you anything.”

“I’m scared she’ll laugh at me. Reject me.”

“Really? Slut-shaming probably hurts a whole lot worse.”

He winced. “Point taken.”

Tully stared at him and he felt her glare. “What? Now?” he asked, lifting his arms in mock surrender.

“Now. You go after her right now and find her. Tell her. Maybe you should try to before anything else happens. She deserves to know now.”

Chris was startled. “Now? Are you for real? Are you suggesting I go to Medford after her? Both of them? I could get fired. If the boss sees I’m there or suspects I’m trying to sabotage his—”

“Is she worth it? An apology?”

“Yes, of course. She’s definitely worth an apology.”

“Then get out of here and go make it right.”

Taking in a deep breath, Chris jumped to his feet and crossed the room before enveloping Tully’s small frame. “I love you, Mom.”

She patted his back. “Then go.”

“Going.”

Energized, Chris launched himself out of Tully’s apartment and into his truck. Burning rubber towards the freeway, Chris was flying high off his mother’s words. His emotions were filled with hope… and dread… and embarrassment… but he was going to find her anyway.

After trying to get his thoughts straight on the drive north, Chris squealed into the parking lot of the hotel, slammed on the brakes, and stared at the resort. It was posh. He glanced down and winced at his construction attire. Not appropriate, but it was all he had. This was him… the man he was, and all he had to offer. And he feared he wasn’t physically what Julia wanted but maybe she’d value their companionship and similar personalities more than his appearance. They could be best friends. Easily. He’d never felt that way with a woman before. Never so much at ease. Or so well listened to. Not to mention the chemistry of attraction and the like.

He sucked in a breath. It was now or never.

Slamming the truck door, he crossed the parking lot, ready to start his life. Or perhaps, he was about to end it along with his job and any future chances with his father and… everything.