I wait for Marie out by the flat rock. I finally hear the crack of a dry twig behind me, and turn to see her emerging from the trail. She looks even better than the last time I saw her, if that's possible. She's got a slight tan, and she grins as I wave.
"Apple?" I ask her, holding one out. She nods, and I toss it to her. She catches it, and takes a big bite as she sits next to me. We sit in silence for a moment as she chews.
"Maybe it's better if we don't talk about it," she finally says. I nod. It's the first time we've seen each other since we had sex, and while I can't get it off my mind, we do need to keep things professionally.
"When this case is over…" I begin, before backtracking. "Well, maybe it's best not to get ahead of ourselves. How's everything going?"
"Good. I've been hanging out with the old ladies a lot."
"The texts are helpful," I tell her. She's been texting me every time one of the old ladies tells her about the brothers heading out of town for work. "We might be able to catch them in action."
"That's what I figured. I'll keep my ears open in case they give any more details. They're not fully open around me, though, since I'm a sweet butt."
"I'm surprised they've told you this much. From what I've learned over the years, it seems like sweet butts and old ladies don't interact that much. They're in different classes."
"Yeah, that's right," Marie agrees, though there's a slight hesitation in her voice. "Remember that brother named Ford I told you about?"
"The black-ops Marine, sure."
"Well, he sort of introduced me."
I feel a flare of heat in my chest that extends up into my head and makes it pound. "Just because he thinks you're nice?" I ask.
"Drew…"
"I'm just, I'm not…"
"You sent me in there to be a sweet butt, and I've been spared the worst of it. This is good news."
"What do you mean, you've 'been spared the worst of it'? How?"
"Ford warned everyone else not to touch me."
"Because…" I press her, trying to control myself.
"Because he wants me for himself."
"So you and he are…?"
Marie jumps off the rock and faces me, her hands on her hips. "What do you want to say to you right now? You're acting more like a jealous boyfriend than my handler."
"I'm not jealous!" I retort, though I know it's a lie.
"You sent me in there to get information, and that's what I'm doing. You asked me to be a sweet butt, knowing what that could have meant, and I come here with good news and you're acting upset about it."
"I'm sorry, okay?! I just…it's strange, is all." I take a deep breath. "You're right. It is good news." She looks slightly mollified, but still doesn't sit back down. "He treats you well?"
"Yes. He seemed a little suspicious at first, but not anymore."
"Good." Another silence stretches out between us. "And you're not getting too attached?"
"Drew!"
"I'm asking as your handler," I tell her. "This is your first time undercover, and I'm telling you, it's easy to start identifying with the people you're investigating."
"I can still like things about them and keep a clear eye on the mission," she replies defiantly.
"Okay, what do you like about them?"
She shifts uncomfortably. "Well, they did this whole charity event the other week for the Shiners."
"And that's great that a charity is getting money. But the reason they're throwing those events is to keep public opinion in Paradise Falls on their side. They want to be able to operate easily in their own hometown without having a bunch of watchful eyes ready to report on all their movements."
"I'm just saying that there are good people in the Death Dealers, too. I'm not getting attached or losing my objectivity. I'm just saying."
"There are more monsters than good people, Marie. Far more. They just took out a small time dealer in Fort Brynard this week because they thought she was talking to the cops. She was younger than you. You want to see the crime scene photos?"
She shivers slightly. "I get it, okay? I'm working as hard as I can. I have to figure out a way to stay sane."
"I know," I tell her, placing my hands on her shoulders. "You've been doing great work. I can't believe how quickly you've been able to gain access to people at this level inside the MC. We've been trying to take down the Death Dealers for years, and never had this kind of shot at success. And that's all thanks to you."
She nods stiffly. "How's Lieutenant Ebert?"
"Good. Anxious to hear about how you're doing. I'm trying to keep his expectations in line. Because of his son, he's just getting desperate. It's tough to see an organization like this still exist when they've done so much evil."
"No pressure," she says with a weak smile.
"Sorry. I didn't mean to put it all on your shoulders."
"And you?"
"Me?"
"How are you?" she asks, looking up at me with those impossibly green eyes. How am I? I can't sleep because I'm thinking about you, worrying about you. I think if I saw that guy Ford right now, I'd kill him on the spot.
"Fine," I reply.
"Uh-huh," she says, her eyes narrowing slightly with suspicion. "Well, I better get back. I've got a shift at the Keep tonight." She reaches up and gives my hand a squeeze, then turns away. My arms drop back down to my sides.
"Stay safe," I call after her.
"I'll do my best," she says over her shoulder with a wry smile. I wait twenty minutes, giving her time to leave, before I head back to my car.
Everything's going well. She has a protector in the club, she's gaining access to more and more information…but I just can't shake the feeling that she's keeping something from me.