J

 

The ride home is silent. Jules sobs as I hold her against me in the back seat. I see Cole glancing at us in the rearview mirror, but I can’t meet his gaze. I feel too open, too exposed. Like he can suddenly see through every wall I’ve hidden behind. That he can see the me I keep hidden. The me no one really knows. Right now, that is the last thing I need. I want it, but I can’t.

 

Cole drops us off. He’s quiet. The only thing he says when I get out of his truck is that he’ll text me later. Yes, I am scared of this whole DiMarco thing, but I am more scared of Cole. What he could be, what I want him to be.

 

After we walk through the door, Jules slams it behind us, glaring at me. I knew this was coming. I knew telling her was not a good idea.

 

“I can’t fucking believe you, J. I am so mad at you right now. How could you keep this from me? Me?”

 

“Jules—”

 

“No, J. I talk, you listen. What are you thinking? You are going to get yourself killed. If not you, your dad or someone in that shop. I know you’re trying to protect everyone, but what about you? Who is protecting you while you are running around trying to save the fucking world? I love your crazy ass. I can’t even imagine what my life would be like without you.” She stops when the tears come harder.

 

“Jules, I love you. I am not trying to save the world. I can’t let Pop know what happened to me. I have Cole and Asher helping now, but I won’t go to the police. They threatened Pop’s life if I did. I just need to figure out this whole thing.”

 

Jules drops onto the couch. “There is no way to talk you out of this, is there?”

 

“No, there isn’t. I have to do this.”

 

“Ash told me so many things about these guys. How bad they are. What they are capable of. Do you really know what you are getting yourself into?”

 

I sit next to her and take her hand in mine. “Yes, I do, but I have to do this.”

 

“If you get in over your head, promise me you’ll stop and let Cole and Asher take care of it.”

 

“I promise.”

 

How can I let Cole take care of this? He has so much to lose. I won’t be the reason he could possibly end up back in prison.

 

*

 

The next few weeks crawl by. I am always looking over my shoulder. I don’t know when Justin or one of the DiMarcos will pop up. I’ve seen them around town, just watching. I went into CVS to get allergy medicine, walked out, and saw Angelo leaning on his car three spots away from my Jeep. I stopped and stared, but he never said anything. He just smiled and got into his car, waving as he passed. I know he is trying to rattle me…and it is working. He’s proving he knows where I am at all times.

 

I walk into the shop, not knowing what to expect. It’s Friday. Family dinner night. Pop didn’t have the last two, making some lame excuses to everybody. The boys have started asking what’s going on. All my life, we’ve missed family dinner maybe three times. To not have it two weeks in a row is unheard of.

 

When I head for Pop’s office, I can already tell it’s going to be a trying day. I hear Pop and Nan in yet another argument. It seems that’s all these two do anymore. Knocking on his door frame has both of them turning toward me.

 

“Hey, we need to talk about dinner tonight.”

 

Pop holds up his hand. “No dinner.”

 

Walking farther into the office, I shut the door behind me. “Pop, we have to have dinner. It’s been a couple weeks since the last one. Everyone is starting to wonder what’s going on. If you don’t want whoever is stealing from you to know you’ve figured out about the missing money, you need to keep acting normally. That means dinner.”

 

Pop sits in his chair. “Shit. I have been spending so much time pissed off, I forgot. Yeah, it’s fine. Tell everybody dinner is on for tonight. Maybe it will help.”

 

I look between him and Nan before I open the door. “Pop, I know you are pissed, but remember who has your back in this.” He nods, but doesn’t say anything more.

 

I have about eight hours to figure out what the hell I am going to make. I’m sure Pop’s house is a disaster, too. I decide to see what the day holds to see if I can get away early. If not, pizza it is.

 

When I walk into the shop, Todd, Mickey, Mark, and Steve are standing by the coffee machine, waiting for it to finish brewing. “Hey, guys. Family dinner tonight.”

 

Todd grabs the carafe as soon as the machine stops dripping. “I was just thinking about that. Hilary will be glad. She’s missed you.”

 

“Yeah, it seems like forever.”

 

Grabbing the keys for my next car, I head to the parking lot. Just as I get to the Chevy, I see a dark SUV pull out from around the building and head in my direction. I freeze, knowing exactly who’s driving it. When it comes to a stop beside me, Justin rolls down his window.

 

“I thought Angelo made himself pretty clear. He told you no police.”

 

“I didn’t go to the cops.”

 

“Just because you didn’t walk into a police station doesn’t mean you didn’t inform someone who works there. Angelo warned you. He told you what would happen.”

 

“Please, no. Just—”

 

“If I get any kind of feeling your cop buddy is snooping around, you will pay. You hear me?” He looks over my body. “I can think of a million ways to make you submit to me…again.” He licks his lips. I can feel the bile rise in my throat. “I will make you beg, you can bet your sweet ass on that. I can’t wait to hear those words come from your perfect lips. You’ll be begging me to sink my dick into you again.”

 

Seeing Cole pulling into the lot, I step back from the SUV. Justin smiles at me again. “I’ll see you around, J.” He pulls away and onto the street.

 

I feel like my legs are going to give out. I bend over, putting my hands on my knees. I feel dizzy, my heart’s racing, and my thoughts are all over the place. I hear boots on the gravel coming toward me. I stand quickly.

 

“What’s wrong? Who was that?” Cole asks.

 

“Justin,” I say, starting to shake.

 

Cole pulls me to him. “Just take deep breaths. You’re going to hyperventilate. In and out slowly, J.”

 

“No,” I say, pushing against his chest. He told Asher. They are going to do God knows what and it’s all his fault. “This is your fault.” I push him again.

 

Cole lets me step away, and I immediately miss his warmth. “My fault?”

 

“You are the one who told Asher. They know. They know Asher knows. They know he’s a detective. You did this.”

 

“What did he say, J?” I shake my head. I can’t trust him. I have to do this alone. When I don’t answer, he walks over to me and grabs my arms. “What did he fucking say?”

 

“He said… He said he’d love to see me submit again. That he’d love to see me beg.” I feel the bile rise in my throat. He didn’t outright say he was going to rape me, but all the implications were there.

 

Cole’s nostrils flare, his breathing heavy. His hands fall from my arms and ball into fists as he starts pacing the lot. Just as he turns to say something, Todd appears at the door.

 

“Everything okay out here?”

 

I look at Cole, my eyes meeting his. I don’t think I have seen him this pissed off. He turns and walks away, climbs into his truck, and squeals out of the lot. I watch him leave, then turn back to Todd.

 

“Uh, yeah. Everything is fine. Cole and I…just had a little disagreement.” I can tell by the look on Todd’s face he doesn’t believe anything I just said.