I keep swiping left until something that pops out at me makes me smile. An adventurous couple looking for someone to join in on their fun. I swipe to the right indicating like and with joys we are a match. They must have liked my profile also. I write a quick message telling them hello and ask what they are after.
You have to like Tinder.
My only down fall is that I am really fussy on who my couples are.
There is hardly anyone out there that are after what I’m after, but I have found the odd couple here and there who share the same interests as me.
It's Friday night and I am just finishing up my latest book, pressing save before I start to go and get ready. It has been a few weeks since the last couple I was with and I am starting to get sexually frustrated.
I am hoping I find what I’m looking for tonight.
I grab a shower, I just had everything waxed last week so I’m good to go. I put my hair in messy waves and decide to wear a black halter neck dress. I find wearing dresses and skirts is better access for myself.
Wearing my neutral makeup, I look in the mirror smiling at myself. I feel lucky tonight. I am grabbing my bag and keys when my phone rings and I see the couple have replied. They are looking for an open-minded girl who wants to join in on their fantasies and desires.
Bingo.
I reply that I am their girl but I don’t join in sexually.
After Hope, I never want to get attached to anyone.
Sex is sex, but unfortunately for me, sex brings emotions. Right now, I don’t need them. I sigh as I think about her. I do miss her in a weird way but once her guy Darryl, got addicted to me watching them, me being with her, she ended it. She didn’t like that he would only sleep with her if I was in the room.
I don’t blame her.
All crushes have to end one day.
She wasn’t mine to begin with.
I know what you are thinking.
No, I’m not a lesbian. Bisexual, maybe.
Hope was different and I tried to find a girl with the same connection I had with her but it hasn’t happened.
Having sex with a guy, even if we bring kinkiness into it. I find it boring.
Watching though, watching each moment, now that is something that gets my blood pumping. It has become my drug and also the muse in my work.
I have been with couples who think they can handle a person watching but a few can’t. Most women get shy and have doubts. I have even been with a couple where the woman wanted to have sex under the sheets so I wouldn’t be able to fully watch.
Women try and keep their men happy by following their desires but it isn’t for everyone. I always tell them there are no hard feelings. I do go home disappointed but it takes a lot of self-confidence and self-esteem to be able to let someone in to watch an intimate act.
With the taxi waiting for me, I get in heading to the pubs I like, grabbing myself a drink and finding a seat where I can watch the crowd.
I told Hannah what happened that night. The look on her face was priceless but she thought it was a one-time thing and at first so did I, but with Hope asking me to watch, I found myself not being able to say no.
Now I can’t stop.
I get restless and I dream of being in the corner of the room, watching the man slipping his hard dick inside the girl. Hearing her wetness soak his cock. Her screaming out for more.
I see loads of couples out, smiling and laughing. After an hour, I head to the next place until it’s time to reach my favourite club.
I did find it weird being out on my own but now I’m used to it. I normally go out with Hannah but if she can’t make it, I still go out. Especially when I need my own release. I order myself a cocktail and take a seat near the bar so I’m close to the dance floor. I keep my eyes away from the DJ box even though my body is screaming for me to look, I ignore it. I look to the dancefloor and see a couple laughing as they dance with one another.
“Looking for your next victims?” Nieve asks me. She is the bartender I noticed when I first met Hope. She is bisexual and has been flirting with me for a very long time. She has kind of twigged to what I do.
“Aren’t I always.” I smile to her as she shakes her head, walking away to serve a customer.
I take a sip of my drink, turning to see the couple and when they head my way to the bar I turn back watching them as they order their drinks. “You both look so cute together,” I say and the girl beams at me.
“Thank you.” She says in a soft voice. “You should see us any other day, we may not be as cute.”
“Don’t listen to her.” The guy chuckles. I look to his light brown hair and green eyes, to her red hair and green eyes.
“Are you on your own?” The girl asks looking around me.
“I’m afraid so, but I love the cheesy music, it’s my weakness.”
“Oh God mine too, I was told I was born in the wrong generation. I wish I appreciated the boy bands and girl bands when I was younger.”
“A girl after my own heart.” I press my hand against my chest.
“Would you like a drink?” The guy asks me.
“Are you sure?”
“I wouldn’t ask if I wasn’t.” I smile sweetly at him.
“Thank you, I will have whatever she is having.” I watch as he orders my drink and passes to me when it’s ready. “Thank you again.”
“Would you like to join us?” The girl steps away from the busy bar to the other side of me, the guy joining her.
“I don’t want to be a burden.”
“A girl shouldn’t be on her own.” The guy agrees with his girl.
“I could be a murderer.” I laugh.
“Are you?” The guy asks smiling.
“Afraid not.” I shrug, pretending to look sad.
“Well, I am in the mood to dance.” The girl takes my hand and guides me to the dance floor. “What are your names?” I ask as we start dancing to S club 7.
“I’m Hilary and he’s Lewis and you?”
“Angel.” They both stop.
“That’s your real name?” She asks shocked. I giggle.
“I’m afraid so, but trust me, I’m no Angel,” I say leaning closer to them both.
“Where would the fun be in that?” Lewis says. I toast my drink to his.
“Exactly.” We continue dancing.
We dance and drink and talk in-between, they do seem like the perfect couple. He is very attentive to her and she looks at him adoringly, I’m starting to think that this couple isn’t into what I am after.
Lewis heads to the bar to order another round as Hilary and I continue dancing, singing along to the words. Lady Gaga ‘Born this way’ starts to play and I notice a few girls that I have met recently who bat for the other team come to the dance floor. A few make out and I notice Hilary watch but quickly look away.
“Does that make you uncomfortable?” I see her face flush.
“No, not at all.”
“Have you ever kissed a girl?”
She shakes her head. “Have you?”
Nodding. “I have. I kind of like men and women.”
“Oh.” Is all she says.
“Did I make it weird?”
“No, I just didn’t think you would, you don’t seem the type.” I laugh.
“Yeah, well you can’t help who you like.” I think sadly.
“I hope I didn’t upset you.” She holds my hand.
“No of course not. I guess you have to try everything once though, life is short after all.”
“That is so true. So, what is the wildest thing you have ever done?” She smiles wickedly at me.
“You really want to know?” She takes a sip of her drink before nodding. “I kind of watch people.”
“Watch people?”
“I ummm, kind of watch people as they have sex.” She looks at me in shock.
“Do they know?” I burst out laughing.
“Yes, they know.” I laugh again. “They will ask me to watch.”
“But why?”
“I guess it’s the thrill of it, letting a person watch something so intimate, to pick up the sexual desire.”
“What do you get out of it? Do you join in?”
“I find it such a turn on, to be honest, to just watch. I find watching people make love is better than having it myself, but no I don’t join in, I used to, but now my joy is just to watch.”
“That is interesting.”
I shrug. “We all have our kinks. People are more open minded now since Fifty Shades.” We both laugh. “It takes a lot to let someone do something like that.” She looks at me nodding her head. I can see she is processing what I’m saying.
“Here are your drinks ladies.” Lewis hands me mine.
“I am going to quickly head to the bathroom. I’ll be right back.” I leave the dance floor but when I’m halfway I turn to see Hilary talking to Lewis, probably about what we just talked about.
When I return they will either have gone or stayed.
Sometimes curiosity is a weakness, but it is my gain.
I do my business and wash my hands. I look up in surprise when I see Hope standing behind me. I look away from the reflection heading to the dryers to dry my hands. I have been avoiding her for months and now she wants to talk to me.
“Are you just going to ignore me?” I turn around facing her.
“What do you want me to say, Hope?”
“I’ve been watching you, Angel, getting close to couples, being best friends with lesbians.” I walk slowly towards her.
“Jealous, are we?” I chuckle, walking to the far wall where a long mirror hangs, making sure I look okay.
“I know what you are doing?”
I face her once again. “And so what? What do you want Hope? You wanted me to stay away from you and Darryl, so I did. What I do is my business,” I say angrily.
“I miss you.” She says softly. I turn away from her.
I can’t hear her say that to me.
“Well, you made your choice.” I feel her hands glide up my back to around my front, her hands palming my breasts.
“I really have missed you, Angel. Your touch, the way you made me scream.” She breathes in my ear. Her hands glide down until she reaches my thighs, lifting up my dress until I feel her fingers stroke my aching pussy.
“Don’t,” I say in barely a whisper.
“I need you to want me again. I need you.” I feel her breath against my neck. I turn and when I face her, her lips go on mine in a wanting kiss. The kiss is hard and passionate. She pushes me to the far wall, pressing her body against mine, grinding herself against me. “I knew you still wanted me.” I feel her smile against my lips.
The fog clears and I push her gently away from me. “Is that what this was? To see if I still want you?” I wipe my mouth with the back of my hand.
“You know it wasn’t.” She bites her lip.
“What would Darryl think if he knew you were here kissing me?” I say my voice starting to raise. She looks to the ground then away from me.
“He broke up with you.” I shake my head. She only wanted me now because he doesn’t want her. I’m no one’s second best. “Why?” I ask.
“He wanted other women to watch and join in, but after a while, he didn’t just need me, as long as he had someone in his bed and someone watching, he didn’t care who it was” I hear the sadness in her voice.
“I’m sorry to hear that. You will find someone else.” I start to head to the door but she grabs my hand pulling me towards her.
“I am sorry about how I treated you, I just got paranoid and insecure.” She pleads with me.
“That is what hurt the most. You know I didn’t want him, I never wanted him. It was you. Always you, but because of how he felt you blamed me.”
“I know.” She whispers.
“I won’t be the person to make you feel better about yourself. I’m not a rebound and I’m no one’s second choice.” I walk away from her, heading to the bar needing a few shots down me.
My whole body is shaking.
I still want her.
But I know she is no good for me.
I am ordering six shots of tequila when I notice Hilary and Lewis walk up to me in the corner of my eye, I put on a smile facing them.
“I love tequila,” Hilary says and I pass them two each.
“Me too.” I skip the salt and lime and just down them, right after the other.
“Wow, I couldn’t do that.” I watch as they both do their salt, shot and lemon.
“Depends on what mood I’m in.” I give her a wink and I see her blush again.
“Well, Hil was telling me about what you like doing behind closed doors,” Lewis says before clearing his throat. I look to Hilary who is watching me.
“Yeah, I didn’t mean to be forward, she asked me a question and I answered.”
“No, it's fine, it’s just um.” He rubs the back of his neck. “We have wanted to spice up our love life and because you just watch.” He pauses looking at her. “We would like you to watch us if that’s okay with you?”
I look to them both and they look a little unsure. I want my couples to want to do it. Each of them. “I want you both to want it. It won’t work if you both aren’t one hundred percent sure.”
“We are,” Hilary says confidently.
“Okay. Shall we go now?” They look to one another and nod. Hilary takes my hand as Lewis takes the other. We head outside and I could feel eyes on me, I turn to see Hope watching us. I quickly look away and shake her out of my head.
She can’t give me what I want.
Not anymore.
I walk with them as we head to a cab and when we get inside the whole trip is filled with silence. I don’t say a word as I know a thousand thoughts will be running through their heads.
When we get to their place, we all take a seat in the spacious living room. I look around the space, seeing how clean and well-kept the place is. Walls full with photos of them, flowers on the window sills. It’s very homey.
“What now?” Hilary asks shakily.
“We go upstairs, I will sit in the far corner and you both pretend I’m not there.” She nods and then stands, I stand with her. “Only if you’re sure.”
“I am, just a little nervous.”
“Don’t be.” I give her hand a squeeze and I step back as I watch them head up the stairs, I follow close behind until we reach their room. They head to the bed while I grab a seat near the desk taking it to the far corner. They both look at me and then to the other.
They start off by kissing, which I know is a comfortable move. People kiss in public all the time, so I know this will be easier for them both. He cups her cheeks, then his hands leave her face as he starts to lift up her green and white summer dress, once off leaving her in her white bra and panties he continues to kiss her once again.
Her hands fumble with his trouser buttons until they fall around his ankles and he steps out of them, his lips never leaving hers. Her hands go around his neck pulling him towards her. I can hear their breathing coming in faster.
I try and stay quiet, watching each movement they make.
Lewis undoes her bra and helps her slip it off her arms before taking one of her nipples into his mouth. Her body arching into him. He slowly starts pulling her panties down, his mouth still sucking on her breast, until she is completely naked. He releases her to pull his shirt over his head and pull his own boxers down, freeing his dick.
They both look towards me but I made sure to stay in the shadows, they can see my silhouette but not my facial features.
He lays her softly on the bed and hovers above her, kissing her neck, to her breasts, down her stomach missing her pussy causing her to whimper. He plants little kisses on her thighs, teasing her. When his mouth does reach her wet folds, she arches off the bed, her hands fisting the sheets.
I watch as he sucks and licks her, hearing her moaning out his name is making that ache between my thighs stronger. When she releases her orgasm, he continues sucking on her clit for a minute before kissing her lips once again.
He places his cock at her entrance but not fully entering her. He glides himself between her sex-lips, taunting her. Her fingers dig into his upper arms causing him to groan into her neck.
Lewis rotates his hips so the end of his cock stimulates her clit, causing her to beg to him. She tries arching her bottom half but he pulls back, I see him smirk at her attempts. Her body shaking with want and need.
He finally thrusts inside her making her scream out his name in pleasure. He starts off slow but soon starts to build up a rhythm, thrusting harder inside of her, the bed banging against the wall. I place my hand on my thighs lifting my dress until I reach my own pussy, entering three fingers, my head falls back a moment in my own pleasure. I am soaking wet and feel very swollen.
It has been too long.
I notice them both turn towards the noise. They must know what I’m doing and they continue once again. Him thrusting even harder inside her, her groaning and begging for more. With all of our noises echoing around the room, it makes my release so much closer.
He steps back from Hilary grabbing her hips flipping her around so she is on her hands and knees and enters her once again but this time they are facing me, even though they can hardly see me, I am sure they can see my own movements.
What I am doing. What they are doing to me.
“Harder, please” Hilary begs Lewis and he starts pounding into her. Both of them still facing me as I face them. I start stroking my clit harder, pinching the sensitivity of it. I spread my legs out wider, the wetness dripping down my thighs and soon I scream out my release when I hear Hilary scream out hers at the same time Lewis groans out his.
I place my dress back in place and stand, leaving the room, heading back downstairs grabbing my bag. I like to know once we all come I make an easy retreat. I am opening the door when I hear my name being called, I turn to see Hilary running to me in her dressing gown.
“You don’t need to leave.” She says in her soft voice.
“It’s easier if I leave this way,” I tell her, I watch as she bites her lip. “Don’t be embarrassed about what happened. Trust me it will be something you will always remember and feel proud that you took enough courage to do.”
“It’s not that. I am happy I did it. The sex was so literally out of this world.” We both laugh. “With you there, it made it, even more, sexier somehow.”
“I get it. I do.” I turn, but she stops me.
“Will we see you again?” Her fingers entwined with mine.
“I’m sure you will.” I give her a warm smile.
“Can I ask one favour before you go?”
“Okay,” I say questionly.
“I never kissed a girl before, I was wondering whilst tonight is a night of firsts if I could kiss you. To say that I have. In case I never see you again.” I hesitate for a moment as the last person who kissed my lips was Hope, but this beautiful girl in front of me is asking and how could I say no?
I step towards her, placing my hands on her hips, bringing her into me as my lips touch hers. I kiss her slowly, my tongue stroking along her bottom lip before she opens her mouth giving me entry to massage my tongue with hers.
I pull her a little more so our bodies are tightly touching when I start to pick up speed, kissing her harder. I want her kiss with a girl to be a memorable one. I feel her hands go into my hair, kissing me back just as hard.
Then I pull away both of us panting. “Wow.” She says, her fingers touching where my lips have been.
“Thank you.” I laugh a little.
“That was some kiss.” Her fingers stay put on her mouth as she looks at me in what I can guess as wonderment.
“I wanted your first kiss with a woman to be a pleasant one.”
“And it was. I have to see you again.” She says eagerly and I know that we can’t. She is already starting to have an emotional attachment, mixing feelings up to something else.
“We shall see. Goodbye Hilary.” I kiss her once more, gently, before walking out the door, not looking behind me as I know I can still feel her eyes on me.