I can’t believe they’re getting married. It’s the only thought running through my head as I throw broken tree limbs into the back of my truck. The limbs hitting the side of the truck, most likely scratching it up, isn’t enough to distract me.

It’s not even about them getting married, not entirely. I can’t wrap my head around them getting engaged after being together barely over six months. Tonya and I were together off and on throughout most of high school and marriage never even crossed my mind. It’s probably a good indicator that things between us probably never would have worked out. She wasn’t my forever person.

Charleigh pops into my head. I wanted to see her so badly tonight. Just to focus on something good in my life. Focus on someone who makes me feel better and want to be a better person. But how can I when there’s a twinge of jealousy burning in my gut?

I know he’s been there for Layla since she was born. But it didn’t bother me as much because he still went home to his own house. He wasn’t always with her. Once they’re married…they’ll be living together as a family unit. I’ll be relegated to the part-time dad. My opinions and concerns regarding Layla won’t hold as much sway.

And why should I get a say? I haven’t put in anywhere near as much time into parenting her as they have. I haven’t had to deal with sleepless nights or worry if her fever was too high. If I’m being honest, I would probably freak the hell out.

The day she was born, I knew I wanted to be more to her than my parents were to me. I don’t even know if they planned on having me. I’ve always felt like more of a nuisance than their child. I never want Layla to feel that way when it comes to me. I want, no need, to be around as much as Tonya will allow me to be.

How am I going to do that from a university on the other side of the state? I don’t have any other choice than to transfer to a school closer. And I’ll do it because she is worth it. She’s worth the world, and more.

“Yo, Jake,” Randall cuts into my thoughts. “You’re doing that weird staring thing again. Are you thinking about Charleigh?” He sing songs.

I shake my head, like it’s going to rid me of all my problems. “Not right this second, no.”

“You must be thinking about her,” he argues.

“Jesus, Randall.” I throw the limb in my hand to the ground. “I wish you’d stop talking about Tonya like she’s Voldemort, or some evil overlord. She has a fucking name and happens to be the mother of my child. If you can’t accept that, you can get your ass out of here.”

“Yeah, and she chose another fucking guy to raise your kid with. You aren’t the one playing house with her, he is. I’m just sayin’, it’s messed up.”

I rush toward him, fist raised, when Marshall steps between us and pushes me back.

Marshall’s hand is pressed against my chest. “Calm down, Jake.” He speaks low enough that only I can hear him.

“No,” I push forward. “He has to stop this bullshit. Why does he think he can do people that way?”

Randall’s laughter breaks through the air. “Oh, that’s rich. You used to be just like me. Remember? That’s the whole reason Tonya dumped your ass to begin with. So why don’t you be a little more hypocritical?”

I. See. Red. It’s taking all the strength Marshall has to keep me right where I am. “Dylan,” he yells. “Want to get Randall out of here?”

“On it,” Dylan calls back.

Soon I hear tires peeling out, then dust and gravel fly up, as Dylan does what Marshall asked.

“Dude, what the hell was that?” Marshall demands.

“I’m just tired of him always badmouthing Tonya.” I lean against the truck, sliding down until my ass hits the ground. “She’s never done anything to him.”

“It’s not himself he’s worried about. He’s looking out for you in his own weird way.”

Leaning my head back, I grunt. “More like asshole way.” I study Marshall. There’s something he’s not telling me, and I have a feeling I’m not going to like it. “Whatever it is your keeping from me, go ahead and spit it out.”

“It’s going to get out at some point,” he mutters. “I think he may be projecting his emotions a little bit.”

“Meaning….”

He sighs. “Meaning he had a thing for Tonya, and she chose you. He never even stood a chance, and it still gets to him.”

“Are you serious?”

“Yep,” he shrugs. “He doesn’t want you to feel the way he did when Tonya wanted to be with you.”

“That’s so stupid. It’s not even about her and Reaf.”

“That’s good since you’re seeing Charleigh. But what is it about?”

I roll my eyes. It all seems so absurd now. “It’s about my role in Layla’s life. I’m not sure where I’ll fit in when they get married.”

“You realize that it’s no different than now, right? You’ll still be able to form and build a relationship with her.” He joins me on the ground, leaning against the truck. “Tonya isn’t going to keep Layla from you, neither of them of will. She’s been a lot nicer than most people in this situation.”

“I know. It’s just weird, ya know. They haven’t even been together a year.”

Marshall laughs, “It may be weird, but you can’t put a timeline on love. When you know, you know.” He pauses. “Have you told Charleigh about Layla, yet?”

“Nope.”

“Why not?”

“I don’t want to give her a reason to run for the hills. I don’t even know where we’ll stand at the end of the summer. I’m supposed to go back to school, and I know she won’t go with me.” Marshall is giving me the condescending look he used to give me when I was a jerk to Tonya. I rush on, “Not that I’d ever ask her to give up everything she’s worked so hard for.”

“What do you mean ‘supposed’ to go back to school. Are you not going?”

“I’ll probably transfer somewhere here. I need to be here if I’m going to be a part of Layla’s life.”

“Look at you being all grown up.”

“Speaking of being grown up...” I begin. “What’s going on with you and Bianca?”

“It’s complicated.”

I chuckle, “Isn’t it always? She gives Charleigh a lot of shit when they’re at work. I don’t think she’s a fan so I hope you aren’t planning on inviting her to the bonfire.”

“She has to work. She acts like she’s a badass, but she’s actually really nice. She dealt with a lot of crap to make a name for herself.”

“If you say so, man.”

Marshall stands and holds his hand out to me. “Let’s get the last of the branches loaded up so we can set up the bonfire.”

Thirty minutes later and we’re pulling into the field. Dylan’s car is next to the massive pit we’ve built for the bonfire. I don’t see him or Randall, but I know they’re around here somewhere.

I pull up next to Dylan and put my truck in park just as they emerge from the woods. Randall is holding his hand. He most likely had to blow off some steam and hit a damn tree. He may be a pain in the ass but I know he’d rather hurt himself than anyone else, even when he isn’t in the wrong. He’s the total opposite of his dad in every way. And I have nothing but respect for him because of that.

I step out of the truck and Dylan stands in front of Randall, worried I’m going to attack him. “Hey man, can we talk?”

Dylan looks at Marshall but he doesn’t move until he gets some sort of signal that I’m not going to do anything rash.

Randall joins me at the front of the truck while Marshall and Dylan start unloading the brush.

“I’m sorry,” I say holding my hand out, hoping he grabs it.

He looks down at my hand before grabbing it and giving it a quick shake before putting his hands in his pockets. “It’s okay. I didn’t mean any harm.”

“I get it.”

“Get what?” he asks.

“Marshall told me how you felt about Tonya.” His face falls. “I’m not mad about it. And, I’m not in that same position. I know there’s no future with Tonya, and I don’t want to be with her anymore.”

“Then why the hell did you blow up back there?”

Marshall and Dylan are very slowly pulling the brush out of the bed of the truck. Lingering so they can overhear what we’re saying. I swear they are like a bunch of gossips just itching to know what’s going on.

I motion them away and turn back to Randall. “A bunch of irrational fears about Layla, and where that leaves me. But, I’m good now.”

“Dude, anyone who’s seen you with Layla knows you love her. And Tonya won’t be a bitch about letting you see her, married or not.”

“Thanks. We good?”

“Yeah,” he pats me on the back. “We’re good.”

We finish unloading the limbs, setting them up for optimal burning tomorrow night. It’s a good thing we got that rain earlier in the week or we wouldn’t even be able to have this bonfire.

It’s well after dark when everything is done. We’re sitting around reminiscing about the good old days when we didn’t have any worries, before I became a father, when my phone dings.

Charleigh: I made it home.

Jake: Good deal. Get some rest, I can’t wait to see you tomorrow.

Charleigh: You seem like you’re in a better mood.

Jake: My friends put me in my place.

Charleigh: Want to enlighten me?

Jake: Soon. You should sleep. I know you’ve been on your feet most of the day.

Charleigh: Okay…Goodnight

Jake: Goodnight, Beautiful

I’m not sure what time I make it home, but it feels good having that weight lifted off my shoulder. To know that my friends have my back, and that they believe everything will be okay.

Well as okay as it can be right now. In this moment…it’s enough.