CHAPTER 16
Sara closed the bedroom door behind her and stood still for a moment, soaking in the silence. She’d just watched her munchkins drive away with their dad. The kids were gone. For the next two days, there would be no one needing her help to go potty. No fights to stop. No tummy aches. No scrapes to bandage. No bad dreams. It was only for forty-eight hours, and she had been looking forward to it, but still… It was an unsettling feeling.
She crossed to the bed and sat down on the edge. No, that didn’t feel quite right. She lay back against the pillow and picked up her Kindle. She scrolled through to find Exclusively Yours, the first book in Shannon Stacey’s Kowalski series. She loved Keri and Joe’s story and hoped that like Calgon, it would take her away. After reading and re-reading several paragraphs she knew that it wouldn’t. She grabbed her iPhone and earbuds and figured she’d listen to some music. She couldn’t remember the last time she’d had uninterrupted time to enjoy some tunes. By the second song she tugged the earphones out of her ears.
Nope. Not gonna work. She sat back up.
Just relax already.
Yeah, that didn’t work either. Hmmm. Apparently, the quickest way to achieve a state of Zen-like bliss wasn’t actually to scream at yourself impatiently that you should do it. Who knew?
Pressing her eyes shut, Sara tried to slow her breathing and quell the anxious tide rising in her chest. She had a long list of activities stored in her mind that she was always wishing she had time to do. Do her nails. Take a long, leisurely bath. Watch an entire season of something on Netflix. Actually, sign up for Netflix, for that matter. Now was her chance to chill out and do all of that…only, she couldn’t. She was too jittery.
I’m sure it’s just that I’m not used to having no responsibilities. Being untethered is a little scarier than I imagined it would be.
She snorted. Not a pretty sound, but descriptive. “Yeah, right. Keep telling yourself that,” she muttered under her breath.
If she were honest, she knew the reason every inch of her skin was jumping and her heart was racing—and that reason was staying in the room right on the other side of her bathroom.
Now, with no kids in the equation, she was anxious, wondering what was going to happen. Because…something was. That was the one thing she was sure of. Something was going to happen. And she didn’t know how to feel about that, or how to manage the situation. Butterflies filled her stomach as scenarios filled her mind.
Her X-rated thoughts were interrupted by a firm knock on the door. She gasped and closed her eyes, surrendering to the light-headedness that threatened to overwhelm her at the knowledge of who was on the other side of the door. It was a good thing she was already sitting on the edge of the bed so there was no danger of falling if she passed out.
A head injury? Yeah, not a good look.
After taking a deep, fortifying breath, she stood and crossed the room, her knees shaking beneath her. As much as she tried to inhale and exhale evenly, she was finding it difficult to catch her breath.
Hyperventilation was probably not the sexiest either.
She tried to remain calm, but the knowledge that this was a defining moment of her life swept through her. She was sure of it—as sure as she was of her own name. Tonight was going to change everything in some big and fundamental way. She’d had the same feeling the night that Shelby had graduated high school and Sara had celebrated by going out. That had been the night she’d met Jack, one thing had led to another, and six weeks later, she was peeing on a stick.
That exact sensation washed over her now, but thankfully, she was older and wiser and knew that being on antibiotics can affect the effectiveness of the pill, so there was no danger in tonight’s scenario ending the same way.
A picture of Austin standing in a nursery holding their baby flashed in her mind.
What the F?
Where had that come from? She didn’t want more kids. She had two, one for each hand. That was enough.
Trying to shake the scene that should’ve had her running, screaming, in the other direction, she found herself reaching out and opening the door instead. As she grasped the knob, she saw that her fingers were shaking. She hadn’t even been aware of that until she saw it.
Inhaling through her nose, she steeled herself, and pulled the door toward her.
Just as she had suspected, Austin stood there in the hallway, a knowing half smile on his face. She opened her mouth to speak, to try to take control of the situation, but nothing emerged from her rubber-band-tight vocal chords. This made his smile grow to full-strength, and her heart, which she’d thought had flown away, fluttered in her chest.
“I just stopped by to say goodnight,” he spoke in a low, husky voice that bordered on a whisper.
She nodded. It was all she could manage. Her entire body was raw with awareness of not only his nearness, but also that there were no buffers to disturb them. She knew what she wanted to happen, what she’d felt like she’d been waiting for her whole life to happen, but she couldn’t form the words to express it.
“I’m going to kiss you now.” His eyes grew dark and his tone left no room for argument.
Yep. That’s it.
She nodded again, trembling from head to toe. Austin leaned in slowly, and Sara closed her eyes, every cell in her body alive with anticipation. They hadn’t even touched yet, but she could already taste him on her lips and feel him pressed against her, like the memory of a delicious meal she could still conjure up the flavor of. Only the meal in front of her right now was one she had yet to sample.
Rather than feeling his sweet lips press against hers, or his strong arms around her waist, she was treated to the sensation of his sensual, hot breath on her ear as he whispered, “Don’t worry. I’ll drive.”
Oh damn.
That was it. Those two words put her over the edge. She felt her knees give way beneath her, but before she’d even sunk a few full inches, Austin caught her up in his strong arms and swept her right off her feet. Literally.
Cradling her in his arms, making her feel like a real-life princess at the end of a fairytale, he stepped into the room and kicked the door shut behind them. He reached over and engaged the lock, all in one smooth motion.
“Holy…wow…that might be the single sexiest thing I’ve ever seen in my life.” She gasped, eyes wide, a small smile playing across her lips.
He laughed, but it wasn’t a sound full of mirth and carefree glee. It was intense and smoldering, and she felt that raw chuckle all the way to her core. Looking right into her eyes, he said, “Baby, if that’s the sexiest thing you’ve ever seen, then damn, do I have some things to show you.”
A small whimper escaped her, and Austin covered it by crushing his mouth against hers, moving his lips so passionately she could almost believe he’d been wanting this, needing this, as much as she had—although she didn’t see how that could be possible.
Then there was no more room in her brain for words. No more room for conscious thought even, because Austin was kissing her. Austin was touching her. His arms were wrapped around her, and her body was pressed tightly against his rock-hard form. It was a heady sensation.
She felt like the teenager she’d never had a chance to be—like she was the homecoming queen, and Austin was the star quarterback, and everything was perfect and shiny and young and new. It was the most intoxicating feeling she’d ever experienced. Forget drugs. Forget alcohol. She’d never been in danger of becoming addicted to any of those. However, addiction to Austin Stone? That was a real possibility.
Desperation overwhelmed her, and she began grabbing at his shirt. She wanted—no needed—to feel his skin beneath her touch. When he covered her hand and halted her progress, she sucked in a startled breath.
“Sara,” he rasped, resting his forehead against hers. “Are you sure this is what you want?”
“Yes.” There was a sensual catch in her breathy voice. “I’m sure.”
A deep growl vibrated from Austin’s chest as he lowered her onto the bed, his breath coming in short, heavy pants. Knowing she was the reason he was breathing that hard was the most erotic piece of information her brain had ever processed, bar none, and she felt the heat of it zing all the way through her body, settling in between her legs.
She was so full of sensation and emotion that she didn’t know what to do with herself. She felt like she’d come out of her skin, explode with the intensity Austin was making her feel. She couldn’t stay still, but she didn’t know how to move, where to put her mouth or her hands. The sexual energy in her body was reaching a highly combustible state she simply couldn’t control.
Then she remembered. The idea of control brought it back to her mind.
She didn’t have to know what to do with herself. She didn’t have to decide where to put her hands, or her mouth. She heard Austin’s words replaying in her mind. “I’ll drive.”
Oh, yes. The sexiest thing anyone had ever said to her. She breathed a sigh, one comprised of equal parts relief and arousal, and leaned back into the pillows to let Austin drive. All she had to do was relax and enjoy every single sexy second of the ride.
* * *
Austin couldn’t believe this was really happening. For the past few days, he’d been holding himself back. Trying to rein in his desire to touch, kiss, and claim Sara. But now he was here, with the woman who in one look claimed him, and he was about to make love to her. He was going to explore every inch of her sweet, beautiful body. It seemed too good to be true, but at the same time, it felt a hundred percent right. It felt destined.
He brushed her hair back from her neck and began trailing kisses down that soft flesh that he’d fantasized about. Her pulse thumped beneath his lips, and the sensation sent his body rocketing into the stratosphere. His plan had been to go slow. He had wanted to make this a night they’d both remember forever. He’d wanted to savor every moment they had together, and every inch of her soft, milky skin.
But that plan was out the window now. Need was racing through him with the force of a freight train, and as strong and controlled a man as he usually was, he was no match for the fierce desire that now filled him. He wanted to take her, fast and hard, and he could see with one look in her hungry eyes that she wanted that every bit as much as he did.
He kissed farther down her body, his pace accelerating, blood pounding through his veins with the force of hurricane-level gale winds. He slid his hands to her waistband and gently tugged the hem of her shirt up out of her jeans. Exploring with his fingers, he caressed the silky skin of her hips and stomach, delighting in the way her breath drew in sharply at his touch. God, he loved the way her body reacted to his touch. But he needed to see, to feel more.
With a single tug, he had her shirt the rest of the way over her head and then quickly unhooked her bra with one hand, throwing them both aside as if they were afterthoughts—which they were. His gaze, and his mind, were completely enthralled by her beautiful full breasts the instant they were uncovered.
He devoured her with his eyes, taking in the sensuous curve of her heavy mounds, leading to the dark circles of her areolas, tipped off by the hard, stiff peaks of her nipples. He shivered at seeing how hard they were, and he hadn’t even touched them yet. Or kissed them.
He leaned down and pulled her nipples into his hot mouth, one after the other, alternating the pleasure that sucking on them would send through her. He didn’t want to overload her right away. He teased them with the hard tip of his tongue, then made his tongue soft and swirled it around them, each in turn.
The moans and whimpers coming from her—involuntarily, he could tell—were like the cheering squad at a sports event, urging him on to even greater accomplishments.
He wanted to light her on fire the way he was on fire with desire for her, and even more than that, he wanted to taste every inch of her. No. Wanted was too tame a word. Needed was better, but still not strong enough. It was more like he’d die unless he tasted her sweet juices.
Trailing his mouth down her torso, he peppered her skin with his kisses, letting his lips and his tongue express his hunger. Austin moved more quickly down her body as the intensity between them grew. He had no doubt this was exactly what she wanted as well, when she buried her fingers in the back of his hair, urging him further on and groaning, “Yes, yes, yes!”
Unbuttoning her shorts, he let his fingers wander over each new inch of skin as he uncovered it. It was soft and feminine, just like she was. He loved it. He needed more. He slid her jeans down over her hips, gently removed her shoes from her feet, and pulled her jeans off over her legs. They quickly joined the growing pile of discarded clothing in the corner of the room.
He paused for a moment to drink in the heavenly sight in front of him—Sara in nothing but a tiny, lacy pair of pink panties. He committed that image to memory so he’d never lose it. As beautiful and intoxicating as it was, he couldn’t linger. He had to get to what was underneath that pretty pink slip of lace. He was desperate.
Slowly, he pulled the sexy piece of nothing down over her hips, letting it follow the same path her jeans had just slid down. This time, however, he enjoyed the hot silkiness of her skin as he trailed his hands down her legs—almost as much as he enjoyed the way her muscles jumped and hips bucked beneath his touch.
Raising his head, he took in the glorious sight finally in front of his eyes. Sara Kellan, naked. Damn. Her beauty could not be overstated. She took his breath away.
He stood stock-still, stunned by her body, muscles frozen as his eyes raked over her. He saw her squirm and looked up into her eyes. He saw vulnerability there, but also trust. He loved that combination.
She sat halfway up, resting on her elbows. “So I think it’s your turn to lose the clothes,” need threaded her voice, a small grin pulling at the edges of her mouth.
He smiled languidly. No way was he letting her take control of this encounter. This was his show. He shook his head. “I’m driving. Remember?”
She closed her eyes, and he watched ecstasy visibly wash through her, and it hit him square in the chest. She was so smart, so strong, so capable. She’d obviously been taking care of everyone in her life for so long that she was in desperate need of someone to take care of her, to see to her every need. He was sure as hell going to be that person for her. Even if only for tonight. Even if that’s all he had. He was going to make the most of it. He was going to take damn good care of her.
He dropped to his knees in front of her and spread her legs before covering her glistening mound with his hot mouth, running his tongue up and down her slick wetness. He groaned against her flesh. Fuck. She tasted like honey. He could never get tired of devouring her sweetness.
He worked her with his tongue, increasing the pressure as the rhythm of her movements got more and more frantic. He paid special attention to the ever-hardening nub at the top of her slit, flicking and suckling it with alternating speed and pressure, every movement perfectly calibrated to the reactions he was getting from her body. This was all about her—all about her pleasure, and all about her release. Part of taking care of her needs was making sure she felt comfortable and relaxed, sure—but another huge part of it was making sure her world was rocked when she came, that it rattled her soul and blew her mind.
He knew he was about to accomplish that goal when she knotted her fingers in his hair to the point of pain, her back arched, and her moans began to verge on screams. Knowing she was close, he pushed her over the edge of oblivion by simultaneously slipping two fingers inside her with one hand and sliding the other up her torso to her breast to roll her nipple between his thumb and forefinger. Her inner walls milked him while he kept up the motion and pressure with his tongue and mouth, never breaking the rhythm on her clit.
A hoarse cry ripped from her throat, and her entire body tensed and then spasmed with release. Austin continued to use his mouth to bring her pleasure. He couldn’t help the pride that rose inside him as her body jerked with arousal. He loved knowing he was the one who’d sent those electric sensations thundering through her body.
While she was still reeling from her climax, eyes pressed shut and fingers desperately clutching the pillow around her head, Austin rose and stripped out of his clothes in record time. He was seized with the sudden need to be closer to her. He wanted to be pressed against her, skin to skin, along the entire lengths of their bodies as he plunged himself inside her.
Austin stripped off his jeans and slipped a condom out of his back pocket where he had tucked it earlier in the hopes he might have a need for it. He ripped it open with his teeth and rolled it on before climbing onto the bed and crawled up toward her. She was just starting to come back to her senses, lifting her head and looking at him with softly glazed eyes.
He smiled to himself. Perfect timing.
“Hi,” he whispered.
A slow, lazy, satisfied grin spread across her face. “Hi,” she whispered back, holding her arms out to him, open in invitation.
Damn, he was so ready for this. He’d never wanted anything as much as he wanted this.
He positioned himself over her and groaned when she slipped her hand between their bodies, grasped his cock firmly in her hand and moved him to her opening. Fuck. The feeling of her fingers wrapped around his dick, even through the condom, was life-altering. Nothing he’d ever felt before—not even coming itself—felt as deeply erotic and satisfying as the simple touch of Sara’s fingers around his shaft for the first time.
His body shook with need to drive into her tight opening.
Before plunging into her wet warmth, however, he paused to look into her eyes for a moment. He felt unspoken communication and energy passing between them as they held each other’s gazes. He’d never believed in soul mates, there being one person who was your perfect match, or Zodiac signs and horoscopes. No, he trusted things he could see. Things he could prove. But in that moment, he would’ve sworn that what they shared, the connection, was spiritual. Mystical, even. The one thing he had no doubt about was that it was powerful as hell.
He lowered his lips to hers and slipped his tongue inside her mouth, exploring and kissing with increased fervor. With each pass of his tongue against hers, the intensity in their connection increased. Their bodies began to find a rhythm together, and he thrust himself into her. She cried out, and since they were still locked in a passionate kiss, he felt the vibrations of her exclamation through his mouth and tongue at the same instant it hit his ears.
Primal need roared in him, and his balls tightened with release. For a moment, he was afraid he might lose it. Seeing the arousal and pleasure that he was causing in Sara while he simultaneously felt it, heard it, and tasted it was causing an animalistic urge to build.
He pulled back a little, just far and long enough to groan, “Sara. You feel so good. I’ll try to go slow, but I’m not sure that I can.”
“Don’t,” she moaned in response. Her inner muscles clamped tightly around his shaft. “Please, don’t go slow.”
That was all he needed to hear. Sweat formed on the back of his neck as he started to pump in and out of her at a steady and ever-increasing pace, moving in sync with each other, their heartbeats speeding up together to beat in time with the rhythm their bodies were creating.
Finally, he felt her body clenching around his, and he knew that he could let go. He had, once again, achieved his goal of taking care of her first. She was wrapped around him, muscles tight and tingling with yet another orgasm, and he could now release himself to come as well.
When his senses finally returned from having the hottest, most earth-shattering release of his life, Austin collapsed back onto the bed. He pulled Sara on top of his chest, and she snuggled in as if she’d been made to fit there. Which he was starting to believe she was.
He ran his fingers through her hair and tried to think of the words to say to express what that had been, what it had meant to him. It had been more than sex. It had been more than two people enjoying each other’s bodies. But before he could articulate what he wanted to say, he heard the soft sound of her breathing as her body relaxed against him.
“Sara,” he whispered.
When she didn’t respond, his suspicion that she’d fallen asleep was confirmed. He’d seen the circles under her eyes grow darker every day, and he knew it was because she burned the candle at both ends. Being super mom during the day and then working at night.
Every instinct Austin had was screaming for him to take care of her. To make sure she ate, and not just the kids’ leftovers. To make sure she got enough sleep. To make sure she never had to stress about anything. To make sure she knew she wasn’t alone. And not just for the next few days, he wanted more with her, and now he knew how much.
He wanted forever.