Lo

“Lo, I’m just leaving.”

“Okay, Dad,” I replied, trying to tame my hair into a ponytail. His head appeared around the door and I stifled a laugh. “Hmm, nice hat.”

“Don’t. Bethany picked it out for me yesterday.”

“Oh. Well, she has great fashion sense.” I forced a smile but knew it probably resembled a grimace.

“You’ll be okay?” If he noticed my pained expression, he ignored it.

“Yeah, I’m hanging out with Laurie and the others. Don’t worry. Go, have fun.”

Guilt tightened around my heart but then I remembered he was leaving me to go to Stella’s, so I felt a little better. It was sad, really, that this was what our lives had become—lies wrapped up in fake smiles and forced words.

“I’ll see you later, bye, sweetheart.” He left, and I finished up getting ready. Maverick had texted me earlier to say he’d pick me up at nine-thirty, and that I needed to wear comfortable shoes, as if I ever wore anything else.

Although my tummy hummed with nervous energy, I was excited to be spending the day with him. Just the two of us. Our time alone had been limited since the dance, and we’d spent most of that kissing or touching. Losing ourselves in one another. I wanted to get to know him, to learn his hopes and fears, his dreams and aspirations. I wanted to know everything there was to know about Maverick Prince.

My phone vibrated, and I picked it up, smiling when I saw Maverick’s name.

 

Maverick: The coast is clear

 

With one last check in the mirror, I grabbed my Oxford University hoodie off the back of my door and left my room. Dad was gone. Although he was around more than he’d ever been at the Stone-Prince’s, he still spent a lot of time with Stella and Beth, and I’d grown used to the quiet.

I slid my feet into my favourite Converse and went to meet Maverick. He stood against the Audi, eyes glittering with some indecipherable emotion. But my gaze went straight to the purplish bruise along his cheek, the faint split in his lip.

“What the hell did you do?” I hissed as I reached him, tracing his injuries with my fingertips. He recoiled from my touch, causing my stomach to drop away.

“Come on, we need to get going.” He went to move but I grabbed his arm. “Maverick,” I softened my voice, trying to reach him. “What happened?”

He dragged a hand down his face and blew out a frustrated breath. “Lo, come on. I want to spend the day together. Just you and me. No bullshit. No drama.”

I blinked my eyes in disbelief. “You were fighting again.” I couldn’t disguise the pain in my whisper and his stone mask slammed down.

Just when I thought we were getting somewhere. Yesterday had been a first. We’d hung out with his friends. He’d let me into that part of his life. He must have left Luke’s after me and gone to that godforsaken place.

“Why?” I snapped, feeling the bubble of irritation and disappointment.

“You left and I—” His eyes darted around me, refusing to meet my narrowed gaze.

“Don’t you dare blame this on me. I left because it made sense, because you want to keep this,”—I motioned between us—“a secret.”

“Lo,” his voice was low, heavy with regret. But it was too late for that. Jesus, how often did he do this to himself? I slid my hand down to his wrist and inspected his hands. Angry red marks marred his knuckles and I winced imagining them slamming into bone. A faceless man’s cheek. His ribs.

“Why, Maverick? Just tell me why.”

Eyes clamped shut, he let out a long breath. “Because I need it.”

“But why?” I dropped his hand and curled my fists into his black sweater. “Try to help me understand?”

He dropped his head, his eyes open now and fixed on me. “It’s the only way I know how to make it stop.” His admission hung between us and I waited for him to continue, but instead he said, “I’m fine. It’s barely a scratch.”

“Not the point,” I let out a deep sigh. We were getting nowhere. Maverick wasn’t going to tell me what I wanted to know. Sensing my worsening mood, he looped his arms around my waist and gathered me close.

“I’m sorry, okay. I didn’t think.” His warm breath danced over my skin. “You never have to worry about me Lo. I’ve got it under control. I promise.”

But that was just it, I did worry. Maverick stepped into that ring because he needed it. Not for victory or sick satisfaction at crushing his opponent, but to battle his own personal demons. And I knew first-hand it wasn’t a battle easily won.

“Can we start over? I have the whole day planned.” Hope sparkled in his brown eyes bringing out the flecks of gold.

“The whole day?”

“And tonight, if you’re lucky.” The corner of his mouth lifted in a smirk and he was back—the Maverick I knew. Cocky and self-assured. But for a second, I’d seen another glimpse of the boy from the beach that night last summer. Uncertain. Vulnerable… Damaged.

“So where are we going?” I asked, shelving the argument for now.

“It’s a surprise.” He dropped a kiss to my head and went around to the driver’s side.

I climbed inside grumbling, “I hate surprises.” Maverick chuckled and the tension from seconds earlier evaporated. As he backed out of our small driveway, I couldn’t help but trace the bruise. Irritated and sore, I could imagine the crunch of knuckle against his cheekbone, and my stomach roiled.

Back in Surrey, after the accident, there had been days when I wanted it to be over. The crippling grief. The gaping jagged hole left in my heart by my mum and Elliot. I’d drank or smoked, swallowed or inhaled anything I could, just to forget. To numb everything. So I knew all about wanting to replace one feeling with another. To transport myself to another place. I’d woken up in pools of my own vomit, in stranger’s houses. I’d even woken up in the hospital once after having my stomach pumped… but it was self-inflicted. Self-destruction at its finest. I couldn’t imagine wanting someone, another human being, to hurt me. It made me wonder what could have possibly happened to Maverick to make him step into that ring… to want to hurt in order to forget.

As if he felt me watching, he turned to me and smiled. A rare sight for the boy who carried a darkness within him. A darkness I knew I’d barely uncovered.

~

“Disney? We're going to Disney?” I’d spotted a couple of signs but hadn't wanted to get my hopes up.

“Is that okay?” Uncertainty lingered in Maverick's voice, but my squeal of approval had him relaxing in his seat.

“Is it okay? For real? Do you know how disappointed I was when we didn't get to visit last year?” A pang of sadness washed over me. Maverick noticed, his hand slipping over my knee and squeezing gently.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, I'm fine.” If I didn't let the memories in, didn't give them notice, I could almost pretend I was just a girl on a date with a boy. 

A date at Disney.

I let out a squeak of excitement again. 

“You really like Disney, huh?” Maverick mocked, and I frowned over at him as he turned off the highway.

“You're telling me you don't like Disney?”

He shrugged but I saw how his mouth was curved slightly. “It's okay, I guess.”

“Okay, he says,” I mumbled watching as we drove down Disney Drive. But I caught the flicker of amusement in his eyes, and a frisson of anticipation ran through me at the thought of seeing another side of Maverick.

We rode in silence while Maverick concentrated on the signs directing us to the huge parking lots. “It’s busy,” I said noticing the queue of cars waiting for entry, my anxiety trying to push its way to the surface. But I tamped it down, not wanting to ruin the day before it even got started.

“Yeah, I guess you’re not the only one who loves Disney.” He smirked at me and I poked my tongue out at him. “I got us tickets for both parks.”

“I want to ride Guardians of the Galaxy first, and the parades, we have to see the parades.”

“You really do love Disney,” Maverick grumbled as he followed the line of cars until we were directed to an empty bay. I was first out, excitement buzzing in my veins. I couldn’t remember the last time I was this excited. It was a feeling I wanted to cling to.

To hold on and never let go.

“You look so cute right now.” Maverick came around to me and offered me his hand. I slid my palm into his, sparks of electricity dancing over my skin.

“Thank you.” I grinned at him. “In case I forget to say it later, thank you for this.”

He let out a smooth chuckle tugging me toward the streams of people.

So. Many. People.

Ugh.

But I ignored the masses, following Maverick to the line. Keeping my mind busy on all of the amazing things we would get to do today. “It’s so pretty,” I said as we made it through security, my eyes taking it all in. The Christmas trees, the twinkling lights, fake snow, and music.

“Come on.” Maverick wrapped his arm around me and guided me down an off-shoot pathway. The queues had dispersed now, and I inhaled a deep breath. I could breathe. I was fine.

It was going to be fine.

Better than fine, it was going to be great.

“For someone who doesn’t get the whole Disney thing, you seem awfully sure of where to go,” I mocked.

“It used to be my favorite place to come.”

Used to be. I swallowed over the giant lump in my throat.

“I can’t imagine your mom traipsing around this place in her Louboutin’s.”

“Mom didn’t bring us.”

Oh. If Rebecca hadn’t brought them then it must have meant… Shit. Me and my big mouth.

“It was our yearly vacation with Dad,” Maverick continued, surprising me. “He’d bring me, Macey, Alex, and Elle, out here for the weekend over the holidays. There isn’t a ride in this place we haven’t conquered.” He flashed me a smug grin, but I saw the pain behind his eyes.

“Alex and Elle?”

“Yeah, my half-brother and sister. Alex is sixteen like Summer, and Elle is thirteen.”

“Oh, I didn’t know…” my voice trailed off. Laurie had told me Alec Prince had children with his wife, but no one ever talked about them. “They don’t go to our school?”

Maverick shook his head. “They go to the private school.”

“Oh.”

I wanted to ask more, to find out about his half-brother and sister. But talking about his father hurt, I could see that. So, I wouldn’t push. Not when he was finally opening up. The Guardians of the Galaxy ride loomed up ahead and Maverick weaved through the streams of people, until we were entering the queue. He nudged me first and I waited for the people in front of me to move along, suddenly aware of how packed it was. I’d begged Dad to bring me here last summer. I loved the fairground, theme parks, thrill rides. But that was before. My whole body tensed up and Maverick noticed, sliding his arms through mine and pulling me back to his chest. “Scared?” he whispered.

It wasn’t the first time he’d asked me that, and each time I couldn’t help but wonder if there was some hidden meaning in his question. I sucked in a sharp breath, glanced back at him and pressed my lips together with a small shake of my head. My anxieties only had power over me if I let them. I could do this. It was just a ride. It was safe.

I was safe.

He laughed, dropping a kiss to my nose, and then nudged me forward again. But he didn’t let go. Maverick stayed wrapped around me, moving us as one. A couple of people in the winding queue watched us and I wondered what they saw. A slow blush crept into my cheeks. We hadn’t talked about what we were to one another. And we definitely hadn’t labelled our relationship. But this, being here with him like this, and yesterday at Luke’s, felt significant. It felt like Maverick was trying to tell me something without having to say the actual words.

And the thought comforted me more than I expected.

~

We spent the day moving from ride to ride. After the Guardians of the Galaxy, I avoided any of the rides in enclosed spaces. Maverick noticed my ashen face after that first ride, the slight tremble to my hands, but he didn’t push, and I gave him no answer. I couldn’t go there. Not yet. Not when he’d gone to all this effort for me. I just wanted to enjoy our day together. So, when the music filled the air and the crowds lined Main Street, I yanked Maverick with me to watch the parades. Then we ate cotton candy, and foot long hot dogs, and stood in front of the iconic blue-tipped castle to take selfies.

It was perfect.

Well, almost perfect. But our demons could wait. Disney was the place of dreams, not nightmares.

“My feet hurt so bad,” I said as we walked hand in hand toward Downtown Disney.

“I told you to wear sensible shoes.”

“These are sensible shoes.” I elbowed Maverick’s ribs. “We must have walked miles today.”

“What’s a little pain in the name of Disney?” he mocked drawing me into his side. “Did you want to get food, or head back?”

I checked my watch. “It’s almost six.”

“Is your dad expecting you back?”

“He texted earlier to say he’s staying at Stella’s.”

Anger flashed in Maverick’s eyes, but he didn’t say anything. “There’s this thing we could go to, if you wanted to?”

“Thing?” I said.

His eyes shifted, and I sensed his uncertainty.

“Maverick, what thing?”

“A party.” He released me to rub his jaw. “Hmm, Selina invited us.”

“Selina?” My eyes widened with realisation. “You mean the girl from Luke’s party?”

“It’s not like that, Lo. She’s a friend.”

“Friend, right.”

“Come on.” Maverick crowded me against the wall. “I know Kyle told you nothing happened. I thought you’d ask me… I was waiting for you to ask.” His eyes softened, searching mine. “Why didn’t you ask?”

“I… I don’t know.”

I did know. I just couldn’t tell him the truth.

“She came to Luke’s that night, looking for me. Her brother, Dex, he fights in the same circuit as I do. She’s worried about him. She didn’t know where else to go. Nothing happened.”

“I believe you.”

Relief washed over his features. “She’s been pushing me to bring you around to meet her. Since I knew we were going to be in the area, I said I’d ask you. But we don’t have to go.”

I didn’t know how to feel about Maverick having a girl in his life that knew that side of him—the side he refused to let me see—but I knew he was telling me the truth about them. And if I wanted to learn more about him, maybe she could help.

“Okay, I’ll go.”

A wide smile split his face but then he was kissing me. Drawing tiny whimpers from me as he pressed his hard body against my soft curves. Silently reassuring me I had nothing to worry about.

And I believed him.