SHE WASN’T A CHILD. Or a melodramatic actress in a daytime soap opera, choosing sullen silence or dragging things out for effect.
Even before Svetlana had walked out, Suki knew she would ask Ramon. The need to stop the torture ravaging her insides aside, her assumption that he’d lied to her about his relationship with Svetlana was what had delayed her telling him about her first pregnancy. Condemning him again without concrete evidence would not only demean her, it would erode any possibility of trust between them.
Yes, they had to start from a place of trust so, of course, she would ask him if anything Svetlana had said was true—
‘Miss Langston?’
She composed herself and turned to find the butler a few feet away. ‘Yes?’
‘Señor Acosta called. He’s been delayed. He says I’m to escort you down to the gallery and he’ll find you there as soon as he’s free.’
Trust. Trust.
‘I see. Okay.’
The butler smiled.
‘Umm, you know what, you don’t have to come with me. I know where the gallery is. I’ll be fine on my own.’
The older man frowned. ‘Are you sure?’
Suki forced a smile. ‘Yes.’
Without waiting for an answer, she picked up the clutch, which had somehow dropped to the floor, and walked out of the suite.
Half an hour after she arrived downstairs, Ramon was still nowhere to be seen.
Trust. Trust.
But the affirmation was growing weaker because, even though the size of the gallery and the number of guests were almost three times bigger than the Havana exhibition, she refused to believe she and Ramon would’ve continually missed each other. He wasn’t here. Neither was Svetlana. Which meant they were together?
Was it true? Was he so madly in love with Svetlana he would take her back even after she’d cheated on him?
Her soul shredding, Suki continued to look for him. Eventually, she arrived at a set of doors marked Employees Only.
Biting her lip, she tried to talk herself out it. Then back into it.
She was the fiancée of the gallery owner. Surely that allowed her inner-sanctum access? The pain ravaged, hysteria-stroking demon inside her gave a mocking cackle.
Hand shaking, she pushed the door open. A wide hallway had two offices on either side, all of which were empty. Suki hated herself for the giddy relief that punched through her as she retraced her steps.
About to walk through the doors, she heard the familiar, sultry laugh. Quieter. More illicit? The sound came from the stairwell she hadn’t noticed before. She only took one step before she heard Ramon’s deep rumbling voice. Another step onto the landing and she saw them, one floor down. Face to extremely close face.
‘I’ve done what you wanted, Ramon. Now it’s your turn,’ Svetlana murmured.
‘You think it’s going to be that easy?’ There was a throb of anger in his voice, but also something else. Something spine-chilling.
‘She’s right upstairs. All you have to do is tell her—’
He caught her by the arms, the move so sudden it halted her words. The words snarled in thick Spanish were indecipherable to Suki.
‘God, I love it when you’re so bossy,’ Svetlana groaned. She swayed towards him, closing the small gap between them and sliding her arms up his chest. He didn’t push her away. Instead he walked her backward until her back touched the wall. Then he braced his hands on either side of her head.
Suki’s stomach threatened to flip.
‘Svetlana—’
‘I’ve missed the way you say my name, Ramon. So much.’
Suki stumbled back, the black carpeted floor thankfully dampening her footsteps. She had no recollection of returning to the exhibit floor, had no knowledge of how much time had passed. At some point someone must have offered her a glass of champagne because somehow she held one. When she realised it, she quickly set it down.
She couldn’t stay here. She needed to leave. Needed to—
‘What’s wrong, belleza? You look pale.’
She whirled around at the urgent demand. Stared at him, unable to believe he was in front of her. Unable to contain the pain ripping her heart apart. Unable to stand that guilty look in his eyes.
Numbly, she shook her head. Hold it together.
She turned, spotted Svetlana on the next wall over.
Please. Please. Hold it together. From the dregs of her whittled emotions, she summoned up a smile. ‘Nothing’s wrong. Absolutely nothing. Did you take care of your business?’
He stiffened, his eyes narrowing. ‘Yes.’
‘Oh. Good.’
Two guests approached. One grabbed his arm. ‘Ramon? There you are. We’ve been searching everywhere for you. Come and meet—’
‘Pardon me a moment,’ Ramon rasped, ignoring his guests to frown down at her. ‘Suki—’
With her last particle of energy, she waved him off. ‘It’s okay. You’re the host. Go and do your thing. I’ll find you if I need you.’
He didn’t fail to catch the stress in her words. His jaw clenched, but, short of being rude to his invited guests, he had no choice but to be cordial.
The hot, ragged breath that poured from the depths of her soul strangled when her gaze locked with Svetlana’s.
The Russian didn’t need to say one word. Her smug smile said it all.
* * *
How she managed to get herself up to the suite and into bed would remain a puzzle to her for ever.
At first she thought she was dreaming when she heard him call her name. The firm hand on her shoulder woke her into a fresh recollection of her nightmare. Turning over in bed, she stared at the tall form of Ramon cast in half-shadow from the bathroom vanity light. Beneath the drapes, sunlight filtered through.
She sat up, praying there was no trace of the tears she’d shed. ‘Yes?’ she croaked.
‘You left the exhibition without me last night.’
‘You were...occupied.’
He took a step closer, reached for her bedside lamp. ‘No!’
He froze. ‘It’s nine in the morning. Any reason why you prefer to converse in the dark?’
Because seeing you will hurt too much.
‘I had...have a slight headache.’ And a very large heartache. ‘What do you want, Ramon?’
‘I’ve been contacted by your mother’s doctors. She wishes to speak to you.’
Her heart lurched as she sat up. ‘Is she okay?’
‘She’s having second thoughts about the next course of treatment. They tried to reach you earlier but didn’t get through. Nor did I last night.’ The question was clear in his tone.
She’d seen his phone calls but hadn’t been able to bring herself to answer them. ‘I silenced it so I could sleep.’
Reaching for the phone, she flipped the mute button off, still unable to look him in the eye. ‘I’d like to call my mother now, please.’
‘Suki, we need to talk—’
‘I don’t want to keep my mother waiting.’
Grim silence met her request. Then he nodded and left the room.
Suki was one hundred per cent sure the sensation zipping through her wasn’t relief. For the moment she pushed her turmoil aside and dialled her mother’s hospital.
But it wasn’t her mother who answered, but the doctor.
‘Miss Langston, we think your mother could use some support to see her through this second stage. Are you able to be with her?’
The lifeline wasn’t one she wished for but she grasped it all the same. ‘Yes. I can be there this afternoon.’
‘Excellent. We look forward to seeing you.’
She emerged from her suite after a quick shower and hastily donned jumpsuit and sandals to find Ramon pacing the living room.
As she’d predicted, seeing him in the sunlight, knowing what he’d been doing with Svetlana in the stairwell last night, was almost too much to bear. Every instinct screamed at her to launch into him, but she needed her energy for her mother. ‘The doctors think I should be there for my mother. I want to go.’
Brooding eyes watched her for a second before he nodded. ‘We’ll head to the airport after breakfast—’
‘No, I prefer to go alone. I don’t want to overwhelm her with company.’
He frowned. ‘Suki—’
‘The doctors checked me out yesterday. Everything’s fine. You’re beginning to smother me and frankly I could do with some room to breathe.’
His jaw gritted and his eyes darkened. ‘Bueno. I have a project to finish in Havana for the next few days. You can have that time.’
‘Thank you,’ she said stiffly.
Breakfast was a silent affair with Ramon eyeing her darkly in between tossing back steaming cups of espresso. The moment she forced down her toast, she stood from the table.
The porter had already headed down with her single suitcase. Behind her, Ramon prowled hard on her fast-clicking heels.
His hand stayed the door before she could open it. When she refused to look at him, he caught her chin in his hand, raised her gaze to his.
Her breath caught at the dark storms swirling in his eyes. Again she wanted to ask the burning questions that trembled through her. But her mother needed her.
‘I’ll arrive at the end of the week, Suki. So get as much breathing done as possible because come Friday morning, we will talk.’
Her hand tightened on her handbag, the alien weight of the ring cutting into her finger. ‘I’m sure we will. Goodbye, Ramon.’
He didn’t respond, only stared at her for a fistful of seconds before he let her go.
Her body operated on automatic while her mind churned for most of the journey. By the time Ramon’s plane landed at London City Airport, she’d worked herself back to her original conclusion. She needed to talk to Ramon, give him a chance to explain. But she was also sure of one thing. Regardless of what he said, there would be no future for them without love.
Svetlana might have thrown a spanner in the works short term but, unless she could find a way to live without Ramon’s love, she might be the one to call time on this thing.
* * *
The private hospital where her mother was receiving the next phase of treatment in East London was so state-of-the-art, it was almost futuristic.
Her mother was looking much healthier than Suki had seen her in a long time, but minutes after she arrived Moira Langston dissolved into tears.
‘Mum, what’s wrong?’ she asked after handing her mother a box of tissues.
‘It’s crazy, isn’t it? It’s only now, when the possibility of getting better and having my life back is in front of me, that I can’t help thinking about the past. Don’t get me wrong, this infection I’ve picked up that could derail the treatment is also responsible for my sorry state, but...’ Moira shook her head, silent tears filling her eyes.
Suki reached for her hand. ‘Everything will be okay, Mum.’
She eyed Suki. ‘Will it? Why have you been crying?’
Suki gave a watery laugh. ‘Solidarity?’ she tried.
‘Has it got something to do with that rock you shoved in your bag before you walked in here? Or the pregnancy glow in your cheeks?’
Suki grimaced. ‘I wasn’t trying to hide anything. I just—’
‘Didn’t want to worry me. I know.’ She paused a beat. ‘So what’s wrong?’
‘I’m in love with him and I’m not sure he feels the same way.’
Her mother’s eyes narrowed. ‘And?’
The stern voice of the mother who’d taught her self-worth even before she’d learnt to walk straightened Suki’s spine. ‘And I owe it to myself to make sure I don’t settle for less than I’m worth?’
Moira smiled and rested her head on the pillow. ‘If nothing else goes right, at least I know I’ve done all right with you,’ she murmured, then closed her eyes.
They had snippets of conversation over the next three days as Moira battled her infection. By Thursday night, Suki was struggling not to show her anxiety.
Ramon had stuck to his guns and given her the breathing room she’d demanded. But it was time to take control of her future once more.
The moment her mother was given the all-clear on Friday morning, Suki kissed her goodbye and summoned a taxi. She toyed with the idea of heading to Ramon’s hotel before she discarded it. For one thing, she needed a shower and a few hours’ sleep before she could function properly. Turning up at Acosta Hotel London dishevelled and with bags under her eyes would probably get her thrown out before she walked through the revolving doors.
Suki didn’t know how sound the decision to go home was until she stopped at the corner shop to buy a pint of milk.
The sense of déjà vu that engulfed her felt like a tsunami sucking her under as she plucked the newspaper from the stand and stared at the front-page picture.
He was shirtless, the grimy towel he used when he sculpted hanging from the back pocket of his low-riding chinos. She was wearing the kind of long-sleeved male dress shirt that strongly hinted at nothing else underneath. Svetlana’s miles-long legs were wrapped tight around his waist, her white-blonde hair tumbled in sexy disarray down her back.
And worst of all, they were standing on the terrace of the villa Suki had had the audacity to hope would be her home one day.
The shopkeeper’s ever-increasing demand for payment snapped her out of her shock long enough to hand over the appropriate change before she was stumbling down the pavement and into her house.
Lurching into the kitchen, she discarded everything, raced upstairs, flung herself on the bed and pulled the covers over her head.
The thumping came not five minutes later. Or perhaps it was five hours. She didn’t know or care. Nor did she acknowledge it.
Next, her phone began to ring. She ignored that too.
Then the banging started again. ‘Open the door, Suki. I know you’re in there.’
‘Go away,’ she screamed.
He went away. Then somehow materialised at the bottom of her bed. ‘Get up, Suki. Now,’ he growled.
She lurched upright in bed. ‘Oh, my God! How did you get in here?’
‘I climbed in through the goddamn kitchen window! We’re going to have a serious talk about your security when we’re done talking about us,’ he snapped.
Her world lit on fire and turned to ash again in the blink of an eye. ‘There is no us, Ramon. I was delusional in thinking there was a possibility. Trust me, I’m fully awake now to the type of man you are.’
His face paled a little before his mouth thinned into a flat line. ‘Because you let that bitch feed you poison or because you’ve read the tabloids and tried and found me guilty? Yes, I found out she was in the suite. Why didn’t you tell me?’
Hot, angry tears prickled her eyes. Snapping back the duvet, she surged to her feet. ‘Because she was there on your behalf. And it wasn’t poison if it was true! And don’t forget your back-stairwell tryst as well! Did it give you a little thrill to grope her like that while she moaned in your ear? God, I love it when you’re so bossy. I’ve missed the way you say my name, Ramon. So much.’
His mouth actually dropped open in shock before he raked his fingers through his hair. ‘Santa Cielo, you heard that?’
She wrapped her hands around her arms. ‘I didn’t stay for the full performance, if that’s what you’re asking.’
‘Pity. If you’d stayed you would’ve got the whole picture, instead of the half-baked conclusions you’re letting hurt you now. And let’s get one thing clear: she wasn’t there on my behalf!’
‘Don’t you dare turn this back on me. You lied to me upstairs when you said you had business to take care of. You lied again when you came back into the gallery, looking as guilty as hell.’
‘She was business, because she turned up uninvited making a nuisance of herself. I didn’t want you stressed so I went down there to deal with her. Somehow she slipped past Security and made her way up to the suite. And I felt guilty afterward for neglecting you for so long.’
‘Wow, and you rail me about my security?’ she snapped.
He paced in a tight back and forth at the end of her bed. ‘She’s...cunning.’
‘You mean she’s good at getting men to do what she wants, you included?’
‘No. I told you, we’re over. We’ve been over for a very long time.’
‘There’s a newspaper photo and article that says something very different. And don’t tell me the picture is false because I recognised the decorator’s scaffolding still on the south wall.’
He let out an exasperated breath. ‘It wasn’t false. She was at the villa two days ago.’
She’d thought the picture that had torn the bottom out of her world had done all the damage she could sustain. She was wrong.
His words sapped the last strength from her legs. Ramon caught her as she swayed. She fought him as he carried her over to the bed.
‘Madre de Dios, stop this!’
‘No. What about you neglecting to tell me she was the one who did the appalling redecoration? Or that she was pregnant with your baby, too? You know what? I don’t want to do this. Just...just get out of my house!’
‘She’s lying, Suki. There was never a baby. And I’m not going anywhere. Not until you hear me out.’
Sitting down, he imprisoned her in his lap. Suki sat stiffly, her every cell fighting not to be consumed once again.
‘Think about it rationally. You lived in Cienfuegos for almost two months. In that time, did you ever spot a paparazzo there?’
Her mouth tightened but it was clear he wasn’t going to carry on until he had an answer. ‘No, but—’
‘So, why would they suddenly show up, if they hadn’t been fed that information?’
‘Ramon. It doesn’t matter—’
His hand tightened on her hip. ‘It matters because she orchestrated it all from start to finish.’
‘Because she wants you back that badly?’
He gave a very masculine, very arrogant shrug.
‘But that picture. It was...’
‘Nothing. Less than nothing,’ he insisted.
‘Was...was that your shirt she was wearing?’
‘I didn’t stop to check. It’s probably one she took from when we were together. Mario alerted me that there was someone on the premises insisting on seeing me. She launched herself at me out of nowhere.’
Suki shook her head, unable to stop the tears that brimmed her eyes. With another pithy curse, he took her face in his hands, tilted it up to his.
‘Don’t do this to yourself, mi amor. Can’t you see she’s not worth it?’ he demanded raggedly.
A wet sob bubbled up from her chest. ‘I can’t get that picture out of my mind.’
‘Try. She cheated on me, Suki. But even if she hadn’t I doubt that we would’ve made it to the altar.’
She wasn’t going to hope.
She wasn’t going to hope.
She...
Oh, hell. Hope bloomed bright and strong. ‘You wouldn’t?’
He shook his head. ‘The initial spark fizzled out very quickly. We both knew it. But she didn’t want to admit failure and I initially left it because I felt a little...guilty.’
Her eyes widened. ‘Guilty? Why?’
‘She overheard me asking Luis about you the day he brought you to the office summer party. Long before we broke up she had a bee in her bonnet about you. She suspected I had a thing for you and she was right. Someone took a picture of us at the Havana event and it made social media. That’s what triggered her nonsense.’
Her breath caught. ‘You had a thing for me?’
‘Each time we met I had a harder time getting you out of my head. I think it was partly why—’
‘You were so mean to me?’
His low chuckle reverberated through her. ‘I couldn’t exactly pull your hair.’
‘You never know. I might have liked it.’
The humorous moment lingered for a split second before it disappeared under the weight of heavier emotions. ‘Ramon—’
His hand tightened in her hair. ‘I would never cheat on you, Suki. I swear. I love you, only you.’
Her heart stopped, then raced wildly in her chest. Blinking tear-filled eyes, she pulled back, searched his face. ‘You love me?’
He squeezed his eyes shut for a second. ‘That night after we made love and I left, I couldn’t stop thinking about you. I must have picked up the phone at least two dozen times every day to call you. Hell, I may have hated you a little for wrecking my workday for weeks on end. When Luis told me about the pregnancy, my first thought was that I finally had a reason to be in your life. A permanent reason.’
‘And then it went away?’ she whispered.
He leaned his forehead against hers. ‘That was one of the worst days of my life,’ he whispered back, his gruff voice thick with sorrow.
‘I’m so sorry. For both of us.’
‘No, I’m sorry. For the way I went about righting what I thought was wrong. You have every right to hate me for the things I said to you. Every right.’
‘I tried very hard to save her, Ramon.’
He held her tighter. ‘Dios, I know that now. But losing Luis and my parents on top of losing the baby...it drove me a little insane. I’m not asking you to forgive me now. Just that you’ll forgive me some day?’ he pleaded hoarsely.
‘No, promising to forgive you some day means hanging on to bad feeling now. I won’t do that. I forgave you the moment I agreed to have this baby with you.’
Sea-green eyes swimming with heavy, wild, unstoppable emotion met hers. ‘Belleza, I don’t deserve you.’
She slid her hands over his five o’clock shadow to cup his face. ‘No, you don’t, but I’m yours anyway.’
A deep shudder rippled through him. In the next instant, she was on her back, both her hands trapped above her head in one of his as he levered himself carefully over her.
‘Tell me again,’ he demanded, his mouth hovering a whisper above hers.
‘I’m yours,’ she whispered fervently.
His free hand trailed down her arm, over her waist to splay possessively over her belly. ‘Again,’ he growled.
She couldn’t stop the tears from filling her eyes again. ‘I love you. I’m yours. We’re yours.’
His own eyes misted as he sucked in a long, unsteady breath. His fingers were equally unsteady as he divested her of her clothes.
He paused when his fingers tangled in her panties. ‘The doctors said it was okay, didn’t they?’
‘They said it was okay weeks ago. But you decided to torture us both.’
He grimaced. ‘I will make up for that now, sí?’
She nodded eagerly. ‘Sí, mi amor. Now and for ever.’