Chapter Thirty
Candice
I couldn’t eat. I couldn’t sleep. I couldn’t stop pacing. I was going out of my mind. My father hadn’t locked me in the room again now that he knew that I could just come out, but I refused to talk to him. I was angry and shocked by what had happened. I’d called the police and they assured me that the right thing would be done. I only hoped that they believed me. I was still hoping that my mother would help him see the light, but so far it didn’t look like she hadn’t gotten through to him. My stomach growled, but I ignored it. It didn’t feel right eating when all of this was going on. My mother had given me a sandwich, but it lay uneaten on my chest of drawers. I walked up to it now and took a bite. Then, despite my resolve, I shoved the whole thing down my throat. I had been even hungrier than I had imagined. The moment I took the last bite, I felt guilty. It wasn’t right that I was at home, eating a sandwich, while Dominic was in jail.
I had given a lot of thought to everything. I had nothing else to do but think anyway. As I paced, I thought about Dominic. I thought back to my friendship with him when we were eleven. I remembered how much fun used to have with him around, how good it felt to be around. It was the start of love even though neither of us knew it back then. I remembered how it had felt when he had been taken from me. I remember that gut-wrenching loneliness I had felt when I had gone to bed that night. My father had tried to introduce me to other kids my age after that, but it didn’t feel the same. They weren’t Dominic. They weren’t my Nicky. And now, seeing him again after all these years, it just reinforced what I had always known – the two of us were meant to be together. I thought about what Axel had said to me, and my father, and my mother, and all their warnings mixed together until I didn’t know who had said what. It didn’t matter anymore. I was not going to give up on us. I was meant to be with Dominic and nothing would get in the way of that.
I called Axel.
“I know you’re angry at me,” I said. “But I just want you to know that I am in love with Dominic. I didn’t mean for any of this to happen. Yeah, I should’ve known that my father was going to make trouble. But, to be honest, Axel, it’s impossible for me to stay away from him. I love him. And I’m going to do everything in my power to make sure that we are together. If he still wants to be with me when all of this is over, then I’m going to be with him. I choose him over my father.”
There was silence on the other end of the phone. I knew that Axel was surprised by my defiance. I thought he was going to shout at me again. But he didn’t, and I felt relief flood through me just knowing that I finally had someone else on my side. Lately, I had felt as if it was only Dominic and me against the world. Now I had Lily, and Axel too.
“Good for you, Candice. I’m glad that you called. I’m sorry about all the things I said to you. I felt bad about it the moment I put down my phone. He’s my friend. I’m just sticking up for him. But, for what it’s worth, I think the two of you are perfect together.”
I smiled. “Thank you, Axel. That means a lot. Listen, how is he holding up? Is he okay? I’m still in the dark here.”
“He’s okay. You know what he’s like. He’s one of the strongest guys I know. He’s holding up fine, but he’s super pissed off.”
“Yeah, so am I,” I said.
“Look, I have to go. But I’ll tell him you called. I’m sure we’ll know what’s happening soon. The lawyer is here.”
“Thanks, Axel,” I said.
I still had no idea what was going on, but I felt better now that I had talked to Axel. At least I knew that Dominic was doing okay. He was fine. For now, that was all I could ask for.
I lay down on the bed, unsure of what to do next. I must’ve been exhausted, because before I knew I had closed my eyes and drifted off. I immediately fell into a dream. In the dream, I was taken back down memory lane. I was sitting in my old kitchen. In the house that we had before this one. The details of the kitchen were vivid, down to the way the floorboards looked, and to the soft whirring sound of the fridge. I was sitting with my father, and I was crying.
“But why did he have to go?” I said to him, and I knew that I was talking about Dominic. It was the day that he had left. “He never told me he was moving away. He’s my best friend.”
My father had taken my hands in his. Big hands that I thought were there to protect me. “There, there, my darling girl. These things happen. Sometimes people just come into your life for a little while. But you’re still young. You have your whole life to make new friends. And you’ll see that they will be even better. You don’t need to worry.”
“But why did they go away?” I asked. I sounded more like I was six instead of the eleven-year-old girl sitting there. There was a sense of desperation in my voice.
“These things happen,” he said again. “His parents have their own reasons for moving away. Don’t worry; you’ll be fine.”
There was something strange in his voice. Something I couldn’t quite understand. I frowned at him. “You never liked him, did you? Or his parents? I heard you fighting once. We both did. You didn’t know we were there. But we heard you fighting. Did you send them away? Did you tell them that I couldn’t be friends with him?”
He shook his head. “No, Candice. They did this all on their own.”
I had no reason not to believe him. But even then, even as a child, I knew that my father was lying to me. But I didn’t want to accept the truth. It was too hard to admit that your own father would do that to you. I brought it up a few more times after that, but eventually, I let it die.
I woke up from the dream with a start. I hadn’t thought of that moment in a long time. I lay there, thinking about Dominic, and wondering how different my life would’ve been if he had stayed. I wanted to go back to the motel and to forget about the world. I stared at my phone, wishing that Dominic would call to tell me that everything was going to be okay, but the phone remained silent in my hands. I had never in my life felt more hopeless.
I found myself about to drift off again when suddenly my mom appeared in the doorway. I sat up and looked at her.
“Mom. Is everything okay?”
“Come on, darling; we’re going out. Grab your coat; it’s kind of chilly out there.”
She walked out before I had the chance to ask her what was going on. I didn’t care, though. I was just glad that I was getting out of that room. I was glad that I finally had something to do. I grabbed my jacket and followed her out.