Chapter Seventeen
“What’s up, McLaughlin? You compete in the games?”
Ian’s demeanor chilled a few dozen degrees. “MacGregor. Aye, I did. Though we’re just leaving now.”
At the mention of “we” Curt’s attention switched to Sarah and Emily. He did a double take when he looked at Emily, before lifting his gaze and arching a brow at Ian.
“I didn’t know you had a kid?”
Sarah’s indrawn breath was clearly heard, and Ian balled his hands into fists. Anger pounded through his blood and he had to draw in a slow calming breath.
A quick glance showed Emily slipping behind her mom, but clutching her hand. If Curt’s words had registered, she didn’t show it.
Ian ignored the question. “We’re on our way out. If you’ll excuse us.”
As they moved to walk by, Curt wrapped a beefy hand around Ian’s shoulder.
“I need a minute of your time, bro.”
Slowly, Ian pried each finger away. “I know what you need, MacGregor, and you should well be aware of my answer by this point.”
“Well maybe I don’t like your answer.”
“We’ll meet you at the car, Ian.” Sarah’s gaze slipped to the ground as she tightened her grip on Emily’s hand. “We’re near the front of the lot.”
Once they were gone, Ian was done holding back. “I told you to leave me the fuck alone.”
“There’s a few things I realized I forgot to sell you. I’ve got this big—”
“We’re done, got it?” Ian lunged forward and grabbed the other man by the shirt. “You stay the hell away from me and my family.”
Curt’s lips twisted into a sneer. “I knew that chick wasn’t just an acquaintance like you said. And you didn’t say nothing about a kid when we were serving time, bro.”
“It’s not any of your business, and I’m not your bro.” Ian shook his head. “I’m done, MacGregor. I’ve come a long ways from the man I was back then. We’re clearly in different worlds now. Go your own path; I’ll go mine.”
“This is fucking bullshit.”
“Do you understand?”
Curt was silent for a moment then grunted. “Yeah. I understand you’re stupid as hell to walk away from this kind of deal, but whatever. I’m done with this shit.”
“Good.” Ian thrust the man away from him, then turned and walked away.
He joined Sarah and Emily in the car a moment later. She started the car and didn’t say a word. Her fingers gripped the steering wheel so hard they were white, and her gaze stayed on the road in front of them as she drove out of the fairgrounds.
He knew he needed to say something, because it was clear she was ill at ease with what had happened. “Sarah?”
She shook her head. “Not now.”
Did she intend to ignore him the hour drive home? Shite, it was going to be a long hour. He settled back against the seat and closed his eyes.
How the hell was he going to convince her that MacGregor was a fluke in his life and she wouldn’t have to worry about him?
Crap. He heaved a sigh and tried to calm his temper.
“Ian, are you really my dad?”
He stilled at Emily’s quiet, serious question. So she’d not only heard Curt’s assumption, but had taken the time to process it and consider it.
Trying to be as inconspicuous as possible, he stole a glance toward Sarah for how to proceed. Maybe she would know the best way to stall her until they got home. But she wouldn’t look at him.
“Yes, Emily, he is.”
Damn. She’d just blurted out the truth without even trying to communicate with him first. He didn’t look away from her—couldn’t figure out what the hell he could even say next. All he could do was wait for Emily’s response.
*
There was silence from the back seat and Sarah wondered if she should’ve just bitten her tongue and waited to tell Emily. But she’d already been so frustrated with what had just happened—that Emily had come face to face with that creepy friend of Ian’s—that when her daughter had flat-out asked if Ian was her dad Sarah had just spit out the truth.
The choice hadn’t been hard. In the car right away? Or two hours from now over dinner? It wasn’t worth trying to stall her just so they could make this conversation go smoothly. Who knew if it would’ve gone smoothly anyway.
Finally she stole a glance in the rearview mirror to check on her daughter.
Emily was staring at the back of Ian’s head, a tiny crinkle between her brows that she knew Emily got from him.
“Really?” she finally asked with suspicion. “Ian’s my dad?”
Sarah gave a small nod. “Really.”
“You’re not lying because I said he was nice?”
Ian laughed at that. “We’re telling the truth, Emily. We actually planned to tell you when we got back to the house, but you’re so clever you figured it out beforehand.”
Sarah gave a small and not so silent harrumph. Figured it out with the help of his no-doubt criminal friend.
The quick look Ian gave her was filled with apology.
“So is that why you came to Whidbey Island, Mom? To marry my dad?”
Hearing the hopeful note in her daughter’s tone, Sarah tightened her grip on the steering wheel. Crap, this is not the direction she wanted to steer this conversation.
“Honey, it’s like I first told you. I came back to work out the details of inheriting Gran’s house.” Sarah kept her voice patient and light, trying not to betray how deeply this topic shook her. “Ian and I bumped into each other again and have become friends.”
“Why didn’t you get married when I was born? Why hasn’t he come and seen me before?”
Because I never told him about you.
Oh God. Hearing her daughter ask that question was hard enough, but seeing the pain on Ian’s face just compounded her guilt.
“I…” She swallowed hard. “Because I…”
“Your mother didn’t know if I was ready to be a father,” Ian said softly. “She made a decision she felt was best at the time. But the important thing is I’m here now, Emily. And more than anything I want to get to know you and be a part of your life. Are you all right with that?”
Emily was silent for a moment and seemed to be weighing his words.
“Yeah. I’m all right with that. How come I don’t look like you though?”
“Oh but you do.” He turned again and pointed to his eyes. “You see? We both have the McLaughlin green eyes.”
“Oh!” Her face lit up and she touched the corner of her eye. “Mom, did you know that? Your eyes are blue, but I have my dad’s. That’s so cool.”
“Aye, it is pretty cool,” Ian replied sagely. “And you know, you also remind me of Kenzie when she was a child. You’re smaller, but you have some similarities.”
“Kenzie.” Emily squealed and bounced in the seat. “That means Kenzie is my aunt, huh? She’s awesome.”
“She is awesome. And that also means Colin and Aleck are both your uncles.”
“Hey, so that man wasn’t lying when he said he was my uncle.” She sighed. “I owe him an apology, huh, Mom?”
Sarah couldn’t help but laugh at the fact her daughter’s manners had come back at this moment.
“Yes, you just might, honey.”
There was silence again for a few minutes, before Emily let out a squeal of excitement that had obviously been building.
“This is the best summer ever. I found out who my dad is and he’s way better than stupid Neil the stepdad.”
She felt rather than saw Ian’s scrutinizing gaze on her. Emily had certainly dropped enough hints that while Neil had an honorable career in the navy, he wasn’t the best husband.
They needed to talk later. They really had so much to chat about.
*
When they arrived home, Emily ran outside to practice gymnastics, leaving Sarah alone with Ian.
They lingered in the kitchen where Sarah checked their dinner in the crockpot. Still at least another hour or so.
“I’m sorry. About everything that happened, but especially about this afternoon.” He paused, seeming to search for the right words. “Curt MacGregor is someone I met while I served my prison time.”
“I gathered.”
Just hearing him say the words prison time had her stomach dropping to her feet. It was a harsh reminder about the man she’d fallen in love with—or really, the man she’d never stopped loving.
He wasn’t perfect—he was at times dangerous as proven by the second-degree assault conviction.
Was he as dangerous as Neil? Maybe not. The closest she’d seen Ian to being violent was when he’d learned about Emily. But even then he’d kept it restrained.
“Curt and I were friends at one point,” he admitted, “but it was circumstance-driven. Our lives don’t mesh anymore. Our life goals are different. I’ve asked him to stay away.”
“And what are your life goals?” She set the lid back on the crockpot and turned to stare at him.
“I want to keep my shop’s success. Build upon it.” He sidled closer. “And I want you and Emily beside me. I want the chance to earn your love back, Sarah. You know that I’ve never stopped loving you.”
A declaration of love. He’d given it as a teenager and her heart had swelled like a flooded river. But hearing it now, even though her heart took off at lightning speed, she couldn’t quite accept it at face value. How much of this declaration was from the fact that he wanted to be in Emily’s life? Why hadn’t he said it before he’d known about his daughter? Why now?
“I’m bored.” The door slammed just after Emily came inside and uttered one of the most popular tween phrases.
Sarah couldn’t have been more grateful for the diversion.
“Go read a book.”
“Hmm. No thanks. Can we walk down to town and go out on that dock again?” Emily asked, her gaze darting between Ian and Sarah. Obviously she was oblivious to any tension. “Please, I really want to look for starfish.”
Sarah shook her head. “Honey, I can’t right now. I need to make the saffron rice and heat up the naan.”
“I don’t mind taking you,” Ian offered. “If you’d like to that is, and it’s all right with your mother?”
She would have to get used to this, Sarah realized. He was her father. Even if her stomach knotted at the idea of sending Emily off alone with him. It wasn’t that she didn’t trust him, she just feared the bonding time between the two.
What if he won her over so completely Emily didn’t want to leave the island? To leave him?
You don’t even want to leave Ian again. Would you blame her?
“That’s fine,” she finally answered with a nod. “Behave yourself and listen to Ian, okay?”
Emily made a woot of joy and grabbed Ian’s hand. “Come on…Dad. Oh my gosh that is so cool to say!”
Sarah watched them leave the house, her heart a bit heavier. There was the crunch of tires in the driveway, and then she heard more chatter.
A moment later Kenzie appeared in the doorway.
“Knock, knock. Can I come in?”
“Hey, you. Please do.” Sarah waved her inside.
“I just swung by to drop off Emily’s sweatshirt. She left it the games while watching me dance.”
“Oh, thank you.” She took the green Tinker Bell sweatshirt from her friend. “This is one of her favorites and she would’ve been bummed out. Hey, do you want to stay for dinner? Chicken Tikka Masala.”
“No, but oh wow, girl. Save me some leftovers.”
Sarah laughed. “You can just stay.”
Actually, it would make her feel a bit more at ease having Kenzie here to break up the tension. Her earlier plan of just the three of them sounded a little more intense now.
“Nope. I’m going to let your happy little family eat together and bond.” Kenzie’s face split into a grin. “I saw the father and daughter walking to the wharf together. Emily was holding his hand and chatting a mile a minute. It was so fantastically adorable.”
And to think she’d been worried at one point that Emily might be upset by the discovery Ian was her dad.
Kenzie tilted her head and narrowed her eyes. “And yet, you don’t seem too thrilled. What’s going on?”
“Nothing. It’s just…it’s a lot to get used to.”
“Really? Just this morning you both were half in love. He kissed you in front of everyone and I figured you guys were on your way to child number two.”
Oh that was a possibility with the forgotten condom yesterday, but Sarah wasn’t even about to get into that.
“I like Ian—” or love “—but sometimes I wonder if he’s the best influence on Emily’s life.”
“You’ve got to be kidding me. You’ve just now decided this?”
“No, I’ve always known it. I got a little caught up in the physical side of things with Ian. I forgot what held me back all these years. It wasn’t just his cheating that night, it was his criminal record.” She sighed. “I discovered his felony just as I was about to tell him about Emily, who was one at the time.”
“And that’s why you didn’t tell him?” Disbelief flashed across her friend’s face, but underneath it was unease.
Sarah shrugged, feeling the heat of a blush steal up her cheeks. “Not just that. It’s Ian overall. He was always getting into trouble. I have to really think about Emily and if it’s detrimental to have someone like that in her life on a long-term basis.”
Sarah was taken aback by the sudden flash of anger in Kenzie’s eyes.
“Someone like that? Do you even know why he committed a felony? Why he nearly beat someone to death? Has he told you that yet?”
“No, he didn’t say,” Sarah admitted. “I’m assuming a bar fight over a girl. An insult. A sneeze he took personally. Does it matter? He nearly beat someone to death.”
Kenzie’s mouth thinned. “You have no idea.”
“Then, please, enlighten me.”
“Remember those guys on the wharf the other day?”
“Yes.”
“There was one in particular who was harassing me.”
“Oh, trust me, I remember.” This was it. She was finally getting the scoop on that guy.
“Well, nine years ago outside the pub he tried to rape me,” Kenzie explained almost offhandedly.
“What?” Sarah could feel the blood draining from her face.
“Fortunately Ian stumbled upon us. He pulled the guy off me and then proceeded to beat the living daylights out of him,” she continued. “Which is what got him arrested and ultimately convicted of second-degree assault.”
Kenzie had nearly been raped. The horror of that realization alone left her stomach churning, but knowing Ian had saved her and gone to jail for it…
“But if he was protecting you—”
“Ian nearly killed him. Charles was flown to Harborview in critical condition.”
“Well the asshole’s obviously fine now,” Sarah seethed. “Did he at least get convicted of attempted rape?”
“No. The jury wasn’t convinced beyond a reasonable doubt that I wasn’t willing. There’d been times I’d been seen flirting with him and we’d left the pub together after an early dinner.” She hesitated. “But outside, it moved too fast. He was violent. Scary. And I asked him to stop but he didn’t. My fear seemed to get him more excited.”
“Oh God, Kenzie, he sounds like a monster. I’m so sorry.”
“At the time I had a bit of a reputation as being a little wild. It’s a small island socially. The jury knew me—knew my reputation.”
“And yet another jury convicted Ian of second-degree assault?” Sarah shook her head, furious now. “Our system is screwed up.”
“Ian never had a chance. My attacker was the son of a respected judge on the island. One who made it a personal goal to charge and convict my brother.”
No. Oh please no. Sarah’s throat grew tight with tears and her heart pounded far too fast in her chest. It made sense with the way the man had seemed to goad Kenzie on the wharf. There’d been a swagger that made Sarah believe he might’ve gotten away with rape had Ian not found them. And the bastard was still out walking free.
“I-I didn’t know. Oh, God, Kenzie. I’m so sorry.”
“I am too. But not for myself, for Ian.” Kenzie’s face pinched and she closed her eyes, shaking her head. “I made stupid choices that day. I nearly invited the damn attack, and ultimately Ian paid the price.”
“Don’t ever say that. I wasn’t there, but to say you invited the attack is ridiculous.”
Suddenly it flickered through her head. Something Ian had said earlier in the week about how he took the word no seriously. She’d half brushed his remark off at the time, but now it made sense.
It was personal. It also explained why he’d insisted on driving her home the other night.
His sister had nearly been raped. His felony was because he’d intervened and taught the guy a lesson.
And she’d been so quick to judge him. So quick to assume the worst about him.
Shame flooded through her and nausea had her stomach churning.
“He doesn’t like me to talk about it,” Kenzie said quietly. “Doesn’t want me to explain why he’s considered a felon. He says if people want to be so quick to judge him, then let them. He only spent three months in prison, but he wears the felon label like a scarlet letter on his chest. He doesn’t think he’s good enough for anyone.” She met Sarah’s gaze. “Especially for you.”
“Oh God…”
“And that’s why it’s so hard to hear you judge him. If he hadn’t stepped in that night, he never would’ve gone to prison. He never would’ve had that felony on his record that you and others are so quick to judge.”
“And then this Charles guy would’ve likely succeeded in raping you.” Just saying the words made her almost sick. Brought up a violence in her that probably was very similar to what Ian had experienced.
“What if Ian simply interrupted my fate?” Kenzie’s jaw flexed. “Charles is walking the streets free as a bird, and I half suspect he’s done this to other women. He knows now he can truly get away with anything.”
“I hope not. But I hope you’re not implying that you’d be better off having been—”
“Of course I wouldn’t be better off, I’d be a mess.” She gave a harsh laugh. “Hell, I’m still a bit of a mess. But maybe if I’d had more physical bruises, if somehow it were clearer what had been happening—”
“You’re blaming the victim, and if it wasn’t yourself you’d be agreeing with me. You had the cards stacked against you, Kenzie. This guy probably found a way to buy that jury. Or they were too blinded by who his dad was.”
Kenzie gave a small, sad shake of her head. “It doesn’t matter anymore. Really. I only told you so you’d know why Ian went to prison. I’m surprised he didn’t tell you.”
“No, he didn’t.” But then, I never gave him the chance. She’d been too busy judging him herself, just as Kenzie had pointed out. Ian had probably decided it wasn’t worth it to try and explain himself.
“You need to give each other a chance. Get beyond this.”
She went silent for a moment and then her head snapped up and she made a small gasp of excitement.
“I have an idea. Since your mom is gone for a few days, why don’t I come get Emily after you guys eat dinner and I’ll bring her back to my place for a sleepover?”
A night alone with Ian—time to talk about the future—suddenly seemed imperative. And yet…
“I don’t know. She’s only just met you; it might be too soon for her.”
“Yes, well, I’m her aunt. Besides, you know me and trust me. And Emily clearly adores me.” Kenzie grinned, her mood obviously lighter now with the change in topic. “Plus I’m her aunt. And she’s ten, not five, so I’m sure she’d love a slumber party. Did I mention I’m her aunt?”
Sarah let out a bubble of laughter. “Only about a handful of times.”
“Perfect. I’m activating my aunt privileges from this moment forward.”
“All right, all right. We’ll check with Emily and if she’s up for it, she’s all yours.”
“Fuck yeah. I’m going to head out and swing by the grocery store for candy, soda, marshmallows—”
“If you bring my child back to me hyped up on sugar tomorrow, I will hurt you.” She raised a hand in warning. “And you know you have to watch your mouth around her?”
Kenzie laughed and headed toward the door. “Heck yeah. Pizza. Chips. Chocolate. One Direction on repeat.”
“Barf. Have fun with that. You’ll win her over in a heartbeat.” Sarah turned back to the crockpot to check the food. “See you in a couple of hours.”
But even with her friend gone, Sarah couldn’t stop thinking about what had nearly happened to Kenzie.
And how Ian had been the avenging angel who’d saved her.
With a heavy heart, she blinked back tears. Oh, God. She had so many wrongs to make right.