“So which stock should we dump?”

Bent over the screen, I studied it, the numbers, arrows, and jargon that might have come off as a foreign language to some people made perfect sense to me. But then again, Daddy – no, I reminded myself, Mr. Hedges; never call him Daddy – had been helping me with this sort of thing for years. One of these days, I’d have as much money as they did and maybe then–

The door swung open before I’d made up my mind.

Immediately, he pushed away from me, and a cold, hard lump settled in my gut as his wife, Diamond, appeared there, along with one of my half-sisters. Paisley was the older one, and the one I liked the least. She saw me as she stepped into the room, although it was more of an acknowledgement that somebody was there. She didn’t really see me at all. I was nothing more than background to her.

Diamond saw me though.

That made me shrink into the seat while my father got up and went to greet her.

“Hello, darlings. How are you? You’re back early from your shopping trip.”

“Mallory took ill.” Diamond’s mouth was tight around the edges. “It looks as though you’ve entertained yourself well enough.”

“Oh…well, I’m just going over some things that she might do to help her mother, love. That’s all. She’s old enough to start earning some of her own money, don’t you think?” He brushed his lips against her cheek.

My face stung with embarrassment. I had money in my pocket from him. Fifty whole dollars. He gave me money all the time. Like it made up for not calling him Daddy like Mallory and Paisley did.

I said nothing though. I knew better.

Diamond stared at me, her eyes as hard as her namesake.

“Quite. If she’s really interested in earning her keep, perhaps she could start working in the garden.”

“She can clean my room,” Paisley said, smiling sweetly. “Mine and Mallory’s. As long as she doesn’t steal from us.”

Steal from her? Clean her room?

I wanted to shout something at her. I didn’t even know what, but all the anger and embarrassment and misery were boiling inside me as I stared at my sister's smug little face. Did she know who we were to each other? No. I decided. No…she couldn’t. If she did, she wouldn’t be so mean, would she? I saw how she was with Mallory. They fought sometimes, but she wasn't mean to Mallory like she was to me.

“Should we show her where the bedrooms are, Daddy?” Paisley asked, looking over at him. “She could get started today.”

Like I didn’t already know where their bedrooms were. Like I hadn't spent my entire life wandering around this huge place, wondering what it would be like to live here, to be a real part of this family. If he said…

“Nonsense.” He hustled them out the door. “I’ve got ideas on what she can do. Leave it to me. Now, let’s go check on your little sister, shall we?”

He shut the door behind him, leaving me in the room with the computer still on and his trade account active.

For a minute, I was tempted to buy something that I knew would tank horribly. There was a hot, miserable ball of hurt in me, brought on by how he’d pulled away from me, by how Diamond had stared at me, by how Paisley had stared down her pretty little nose at me.

My sister. And she talked about me like all I was good for was cleaning rooms.

Moving closer to the computer, I studied all those numbers and signs, that intricate language. I could hurt him now.

But I didn’t.

Sighing, I studied the shares and then chose the one that had caught my eye. Normally, he didn’t like me doing anything without his approval, but he’d told me to make a purchase. I was just doing what he asked.

I left a note telling him and slid out of the room. I’d planned on going shopping with the fifty dollars, but I didn’t want to now. I’d just put it in the bank for when I needed something.

* * *

I’d retreated out to the front porch, claiming that I was still overheated from my run, and I’d taken the paper with me.

Mom knew I read it all the time, so she hadn’t thought much of it.

But so far, I hadn’t been able to do anything but stare at the picture.

Out of all the people in the world…

Suited.

I’d tossed the word back at Jal when he’d used it.

They suited.

Who the hell married somebody because they suited?

But even as I thought it, I knew the answer. My father had married Diamond because she suited him, the life he needed. His wife had to fit the life he’d laid out for himself. She suited him.

“That’s how it’s done in their world,” I said, my voice thicker than I liked, for reasons I didn’t want to think about.

My mother...she'd suited my father for other reasons. Maybe that's all it was, really, no matter how we wanted to spin it. Just some version or another of being suitable.

For some reason, I wished I hadn’t asked Jal how he felt about his fiancée. It would have been easier to sit there, staring at their picture, Paisley looking so smug and happy if I could believe they loved each other. I hadn't seen her in five years. She could've become a whole different person than the one I'd always thought her to be. And it wasn't like I really knew Jal either. For all I knew, the two of them were perfect for each other. Maybe their love made them better people.

My mind spun back to the conversation I’d had with Jal just a couple days ago. How would things have gone if I’d realized who he was marrying? I wouldn’t have gone to New York City, I knew that much. I would have told Alistair something. I would have lied through my teeth and told him that no one could pick up TJ. I would've stayed as far away from Jal as possible, even if it cost me.

But I’d gone, and damn it all, I liked the guy.

I'd been nervous at first, and I always ran my mouth when I was nervous. I'd told him a story that was highly inappropriate to be telling a customer, but he'd laughed, and that'd made me relax. Then we'd gone for a walk and ended up talking about his engagement and marriage. Both of us had been vague.

The idea of getting married any time soon was almost laughable. The last time I’d brought a guy home to my family, it had been so awkward I’d ended up never talking to him again. Hearing people weren’t often comfortable around the deaf, and if somebody couldn’t take my family, they weren’t going to get me. On the flip-side, being somebody who could hear made a lot of the deaf men I knew not that interested in me.

It was no wonder I found my friends-with-benefits arrangement with Tao to be so much more appealing than actual dating. All of the pleasure of sex without any of the shit that came with pretending to believe in love.

Or risking having someone describe me as suitable.

Damn, that word rankled and it wasn't even about me.

The sound of a car blasting down the street drew me out of my memory, and I sighed, shoving my hair back from my face.

I was cold, so cold I was shaking with it, and I knew it was less because of the early March weather and more to do with the shock I'd had this morning.

Slowly folding the paper, I stood up. They did suit each other, I decided.

It was a bitter pill to swallow, staring at their picture, both of them so elegant and refined, Paisley with her perfect sweep of expensively cut hair and clean, classic beauty. Jal was just as beautiful in a clearly masculine way, and the two of them complemented each other. The picture looked candid enough, but my gut said it'd been a little more posed than that.

Before I could crumple the paper into pieces, I went inside and left it on the chair where Tyson would find it and read it. Mom might see the announcement or she might not. Either way, we wouldn't talk about it.

I headed upstairs, determined to get out of my clothes, into the shower, and try to wash away the feeling of inadequacy, that sense of being out of place.

Always out of place, no matter where I was.