The ice clinks in my glass as I lift it off the coffee table. The fire across the room roars and crackles. Those are the only noises in the room, but the noises I'm hearing are different. I can't stop hearing James' last words. The bang of my gun. Over and over, the sounds won’t stop.

Criminal. It was our code word. I keep hearing him say it. We chose that word together, but I’d hoped neither of us would ever have to say it.

“You really going to make me say it again?” My heart twists in my chest as I hear James’ words over and over in my mind. I knew this was a possibility when we signed up for this. We both did. It was only supposed to be months, but it turned into years. But if either of us ever had to say that word, I was hoping it’d be me. Not James.

My official record lists thirty-eight confirmed kills overseas. And he had twenty-six. We were something else, so fucking good the government came to us with an opportunity we couldn’t pass up. One last job, and we'd earn enough cash we could live off it forever.

We were ready to go in, excited even. It sucked having to go in separate, but it made sense.

Fucking Ricky Stone was harder to crack than they said he’d be. He’s a hotheaded fuck, but he still hasn’t shown his cards.

Two years ago, one of the biggest sex trafficking trades went down, but neither of us found out about it until it had passed even though we were supposed to be in on it. We--I can’t seem to get close enough.

I front the money for the cartel, I’m their largest investor. My fake background has me passing myself off as an ex-con. As far as they know, I served time for money laundering, and the connections I made in prison led to my current interest in dealing in women. That's how the cartel found me, actually. Buying women. Of course the women all went free and are now safe and recovering. But they think I killed them when I was done.

That’s what the cartel does. It’s what's expected.

Ricky and Vic are sick fucks; they’re behind the biggest and most profitable sex slave and drug trafficking rings across the globe. From the United States, to Thailand, and plenty of places in between.

I was so close to getting more information about Ricky’s informants and business partners overseas. Or at least the locations where they store the women.

I wonder what James found out. I wonder what he did that tipped them off. Tears prick my eyes and I slam the glass down. Fuck!

And she saw. Olivia. She saw me kill him. It’s against protocol to do anything illegal when you’re undercover. Every action has to be approved first, which is bullshit, and everyone knows it. Even though James told me to kill him, they can’t find out. If she went to the police and told them, they’d pull me out in a heartbeat. If she got out and told, this entire operation would be a wash. Years of hard work would be gone, just like that. I could live with that. But my best friend’s death would be for nothing. I can’t let that happen to James.

I would have killed him for nothing.

For a split second, I considered turning the gun on Ricky, at that cold-blooded, hotheaded prick. I considered just killing him and dying alongside James. It would have been an honorable death.

But the rest of them would have lived, including Vic. And the girls would still have been shipped off. Ricky dying, and maybe one of his henchmen--it wouldn’t have been enough to take them down.

And James said it. He said the one word that meant I needed to pull the trigger.

Criminal.

I swallow the whiskey straight from the bottle this time. My head hurts and my throat burns, but my heart hurts more. I’m in too deep to turn back now.

I need to end this, and the date for the sale is quickly approaching. I know it is.

For him, I’ll make sure they all die. I’ll make sure they pay.

I hear the floor creak above the study. She got out of bed. I grind my teeth, hating the position I’m in.

When I saw her, I thought for a moment I’d done it. I thought I’d pointed the gun at the real enemy, that I’d died. She looked like an angel with her white sweater and sun-kissed skin. Her eyes pleaded with me to save her. They were taking her from me. My angel.

I look down into my empty glass.

There’s no angel out there for me.

If I’d left her there with them, I know what they would have done. I know they would have beaten her and used her body. They would have passed her around before selling her off.

They would have broken her, just like they’ve done with so many others. I couldn’t let it happen, but now I’ve fucked myself.

I’ve been trained on what to expect. I know what I need to do so they’ll believe me and let me in closer.

I have to break her myself.