24. Confirmation - Alex
For the first time in what seemed like forever, it poured. This wasn’t a mere shower of warm, summer rain. This was the kind of torrential downpour that kept people inside, even in August. The weather didn’t stop us though. Rafe led me through the parking lot of a strip mall, my hand clasped in his, and we ducked under the awning of the bridal boutique where Angel and I were scheduled to get fitted for our dresses.
She and Jax joined us seconds later.
“Stay inside the store, okay?” Rafe said.
I nodded.
“Call me if you feel something is off, no matter how small. I’ll be right across the street.”
We’d spent so much time together, just the two of us in the safe solitude of our own making, that neither of us knew how to let go, especially Rafe.
Because my dad and Zach were still threats, and the worst kind—soundless and invisible—possibly preparing for a strike we wouldn’t see coming. As a result, Rafe didn’t want to let me out of his sight.
“I’ll be fine, I promise.”
He frowned, and I sensed an admonishment on the rise about how I shouldn’t promise things I couldn’t guarantee. Before he got the chance, I stood on tiptoe and covered his mouth with mine. He responded, his lips parting to accept my insistent tongue.
“Jesus, babe,” he said, reluctantly breaking away. “I’ve got supplies to get. If you keep kissing me like that, we’re going straight home instead.”
“Go,” I said, pushing against his broad chest. God, I loved summer, despite the rain. The black sleeveless tee he wore showed off his ink, not to mention his toned biceps. Rafe pulled me against him for another taste.
“Save it for the bedroom, guys. We got shit to do.” Jax snickered, and I shot him a glare, almost giving in to the urge to sock him. He held up his hands though the grin didn’t melt from his face.
“You ladies have fun in there.”
“We plan to,” I said, enough sass in my tone that Rafe gave me a warning look. I stole another kiss before entering the boutique, Angel on my heels, silent as usual, and the first sign of a panic attack hit.
My pulse accelerated. Doubt consumed me.
I looked over my shoulder at Rafe’s retreating back through the glass, and I wanted to call after him. Beg him not to leave me.
What if I wasn’t ready for this after all? Without him by my side, I felt exposed and vulnerable.
Angel grabbed my hand and squeezed. “It’s okay.”
Those whispered words, spoken from a girl who had seen more horror than I had, snapped me out of the surge of oncoming hysteria.
Truth be told, I was nervous for a couple of reasons, the biggest having to do with the drugstore next door, and the thought of getting in and out of there without the guys spotting us.
I watched Rafe and Jax cross the road and disappear inside a grocery store, and before I lost my nerve, I grabbed Angel’s hand and pulled her out of the bridal boutique.
“Where are we going?”
“I have to buy something next door.” I studied her expression, my nerves winding around my throat. “Can I trust you to keep a secret?”
She nodded.
I’d take it. I didn’t have much choice. Considering she didn’t talk much, maybe I could trust her to keep this small secret.
Except it might not be so small after all.
As we headed down the sidewalk, careful to stay under the awning and out of the rain, I glanced across the street to where the guys had gone.
Please don’t let them see us.
Just in case, I had a backup plan. I was going to buy two things; a pregnancy test, and some pearly nail polish for the wedding.
The doors slid open, and Angel and I strolled inside. In my peripheral, I noted how she scanned every corner of the store, her eyes lingering extra long on the few men shopping. Her natural instinct was to distrust the opposite sex. Hell, she probably distrusted the human race, period. And who could blame her?
Angel was an enigma to me. I empathized with her on a more personal level because she and I understood the type of horror few people would ever endure. But I couldn’t help the curiosity growing inside me, either.
Had she left behind any friends in the compound where Jax found her? Did she know what joy felt like? Had she ever experienced the passionate side of sex—the all-consuming, soul-to-soul connection that had the power to send you to another realm?
I doubt she knew what any of those things were. I figured we could start with friendship, and slowly, joy would follow. The sex and relationship part…that would be a huge hurdle for her.
“What are you buying?” she asked as she followed me down the feminine hygiene aisle.
I stalled in front of what I needed, a plethora of options all touting the best, most accurate results on the market. Even knowing that I could more than likely trust her, I still had trouble getting the words out. “I need a pregnancy test.”
She took a step back, her blue eyes wide and fearful, as if she could catch the condition of pregnancy by proximity.
“Don’t tell anyone,” I pleaded. “I don’t know for sure, but if I am…”
I couldn’t even go there. My brain was incapable of handling the what-ifs right now. I’d take the test, then I’d know.
And if I had Rafe’s child growing inside me, I’d bury the knowledge until after the wedding. For the sake of my sanity, I needed to.
Picking out a rectangle box with a plus symbol on the front, I was torn on whether I wanted to see that little pink sign show up on the piss stick.
“I won’t say anything,” she said, a genuine note in her soft voice.
“Thank you.” We headed toward the cosmetic section where I grabbed a shimmering bottle of pearly nail polish before going through the checkout stand. With the small brown bag clutched in my hands, purchases hidden inside, I hesitated outside the restrooms. Thankfully, they were single use, so I wouldn’t have to worry about others coming and going while I waited for the type of news that would irrevocably change my life.
And Rafe’s.
But getting my feet to move was the hard part.
“You’ll feel better once you know,” Angel coaxed. “I won’t go anywhere, promise.” She twirled a lock of blond hair around her finger, blue eyes continually on the lookout, though I wasn’t sure what she was searching for. She had a habit of playing with her hair when uncomfortable or nervous.
She didn’t handle being in public well.
“I’ll be out in a couple of minutes.” As I enclosed myself inside the restroom, I let out a breath. The light over the sink flickered every couple of seconds. Grime lined the tiles, and the space had that dirty-restroom-smell that older buildings tended to have, especially when they weren’t properly cared for.
Great. I was about to get life-changing news in a filthy public restroom. I would have laughed if my heart wasn’t thrashing against my ribcage. I tore into the thin box and pulled the instructions out, followed by the foil pouch containing the test. The directions were simple enough. I settled in to do my business, then I waited. Three minutes later, I had my answer.
One missed pill, and one little stick to confirm my fuck-up.
Shit.
Rafe was going to kill me.