Dominic

I march across the carpet at top speed, as if I'm running from some cataclysmic event.

But just like an avalanche, running from my reaction to Laiken is impossible.

Turning her down should have been easy.

It wasn't.

For some reason, in spite of my common sense telling me to keep my distance, I'm instinctually pulled to her. Even now, when I can't see her, I feel like I know where she is. I could close my eyes and find her in the dark. Her heart and her warmth calls to me.

It's distracting me from what I need to focus on. When she told me she had to find a way to keep my mother happy, I was sympathetic. I know too well what it's like to be on the other end of her wrath. But I meant what I said; we're not on the same side.

Yet her comments made me realize that her situation isn't so different from mine. We have similar goals right now, though our methods for reaching them are probably different. I don't know what she was hoping to achieve by asking me for information about my family company. I doubt that anything I could tell her would change her fate.

For all I know, six years have passed and she's still the same wild girl from the woods. I don't know what she's been doing. I never came home during the holidays. All my information came from the occasional phone call and an extremely rare meeting with my father. Bringing up Laiken to him was nerve-racking.

He'd told me a lot of vague, hand-waving bits about how she still had all her limbs, nothing major having happened to her. It was a fucked up way to tell me she was fine.

I clung to every tidbit that had to do with her like a madman.

Maybe that's why it's so hard to be around her now. It's been six years but it feels like we're back to square one.

Except were not.

The way she shivered while I was leaning over her last night... how intoxicating her hair felt wound around my hands... We've never been in a situation like that. Our childlike innocence is long gone.

Focus on what you need to do, I tell myself angrily. Laiken really is dangerously distracting. I go through all the details I have as I walk faster. No one knows anything about Joseph's location. Everyone we've talked to hasn't been much help. The security at the complex has no footage, Joseph clearly hacked the system to keep his escape invisible.

The car he took was found early this morning, only ten miles away. He abandoned it in the middle of nowhere. Him, and our money, have both dissipated into the ether.

I need someone to tell me what to do next. I'd prefer it be my father, but I saw him leave this morning. Much as I don't want to admit it, I have to talk to my mother. I wouldn't say that I'm afraid of her. Fear isn't the right word.

What I have is a massive sense of self-hatred whenever I'm in her presence. My mother has never hidden her disappointment in me. And after what happened yesterday with Joseph, I know I'm on her shit list.

She didn't want me coming home. I wonder if she'll make me leave now, convince my father that this is a waste of time. It doesn't matter that I took control last night, interrogating Laiken like I assured them both I would. To my mother I'm a useless piece of trash.

I suspect I always will be.

Squeezing my fists, I force myself to pull it together. I'm stronger than this self-doubt is making me out to be. My instructors in school drilled me, along with the rest of the student body to learn how to focus and disconnect from stress, so that we could perform.

I channel that as her bedroom comes into view. On the small table outside the room is a fresh vase of daffodils. The door is mostly open; I tap on the doorframe, alerting her to my presence. “Mom?”

She's standing by the window. The curtains are open and the sun makes her shimmer like a ghost. She doesn't turn at the sound of my voice. I can see her hands where they wrap around her biceps from behind. They're digging into her skin; she knows I'm here.

I wait a second then force myself to cross into the room. I don't go farther than that before she finally speaks. “Why do you think you can come in here and talk to me?”

I steel myself, keeping my voice calm. “I know I messed up.” Admitting it cuts me to the bone. I'm ashamed of my mistakes. “I just want to do whatever I can to make everything right. Tell me how I can help.”

“You want to know how you can help?” she asks coolly. Her hips kick to one side then she turns to eyeball me with disdain. I might as well be a cockroach at the moment. “Can you go back in time, prevent me from making the mistake of bringing you into this world?”

Her words sting. I think they won't because I've heard them so many times, but they always do. “I can't change the past, but I can change the present. Just tell me what you want, Mom. Do you want me out there looking for Joseph? Do you want me at the company downtown with Dad, fixing things there?”

She laughs, and there's no humor to it. “There's nothing you can do to make this better, not unless you have some secret way to drag Joseph back to my feet, kicking and screaming. Do you have that, Dominic? Do you have a way?” She advances on me and I tense up. She's a tall woman, but I'm still much bigger. I looked down on her and hold my breath.

She watches me like an owl considering a mouse when it's already eaten enough. Her arms uncross; she heads back to the window. “I don't know how I can trust you with anything. The least you can do is try to keep us from losing Laiken as well. Keep an eye on her. Don't let her off the estate. If she escapes like her father did, not even Silas will stop me from tearing you to shreds.”

I swallow, considering how to respond. “I'll figure something out,” I say. She doesn't even shrug. She gazes out the window and ignores me.

Our conversation is over. I think about a hundred things I could say to her, things I always wished I could. The names I could call her, the ways I would scream and shout and force her to accept that I exist, that I'm here, and I'm worthy of her attention.

I retreat through the door and close it partially behind me. Something moves at the corner of my eye. I jerk my head up, honing in on whoever is watching me.

It's Laiken.

She's standing nearby, not quite blending in with the wallpaper. She startles when my eyes fix on her. My heart instantly beats faster. “What are you doing here?” I ask, more sharply than is needed.

She doesn't waiver, she approaches me, reaching for my hand. I realize she wants to get us away from my mother's room. I avoid her grip, leading us around the corner. When we're out of earshot of the bedroom, Laiken jumps in front of me. “I heard everything,” she says.

My eyebrows fly to my hairline. “Everything?”

Her lips part and she shakes her head a few times. “Okay, not everything. But I heard her talking to you, the tone of her voice. She's mad, isn't she? What did you do?”

God, what a question!  “What didn't I do?” I respond, shrugging. Some of my armor rusts away and I feel my sadness seeping through. I recover as quick as I can hope and she didn't see.

“I did hear one thing clearly,” she says. Looking me in the eye she flashes a devious smile. “She wants you to keep an eye on me, right? That won't be easy if I try to avoid you. I'm pretty fast. I think you saw me in action. I could hide in a ton of places on this estate and make your job really hard.”

She's something else. I love the hint of playfulness in her angled grin. The way she folds her hands behind her back, leaning towards me with her head tilted. It's... refreshing. I've lived my life under a black cloud. Around Laiken, the sun peeks through, breaking apart some of the storm.

I run my fingers through my hair, chuckling dryly. “I do remember how fast you were. I also remember I was faster.”

Her confident grin doesn't even twitch. “I guess. But if you take my deal, I won't make you chase me at all. I'll make your job real easy.”

Combining the thought of her and the word easy thrills me to my core. My muscles bunch up, I'm tempted to catch her right now, right here. Just to see what she'd do.

Looking her over, I finally give a short, but real, laugh. “You don't give up, do you?”

“No,” she says, deadly serious. “I never have.”

I pull a sharp, short breath through my nose. “Here's the deal. If you're keen to hold still, letting me keep you in my sight, I'm inclined to tell you whatever you want to know about my family's business. Who knows, maybe you'll come up with something that makes my parents happy. We'd both like that, I think.” Her eyes light up—I hold up a hand. “However, we're still not on the same side. I'm not going to quit searching for your father.”

A spark of relief brightens her smile. “Still, I want to thank you.”

“Don't thank me. I'm getting involved for my own benefit.”

I say it like it's plainly obvious.

Why do I feel like I'm trying to convince myself?