The conversation had been strained between them on the flight to the Maldives, just awkward small talk that included any topic that wasn't personal. Yet, as the boat they were in to get to their private water villa approached the unbelievable place he'd arranged for them to stay in, maybe the clear to turquoise water, the thatched roofs, or the sun warming her back, something in her finally began to relax, to see the possibilities this paradise on earth could offer.

To say something in her snapped would be wrong; it broke, shattered, in the best way possible. She seemed to take her first real, deep breath in his presence. Allowing herself to hope for the impossible, or maybe just to live each moment in the present, she gave in to enjoying this incredible place with an unbelievable man she happened to be in love with, whole heart and soul when she let herself feel it.

She looked his way, knowing her smile told all, and watched his face relax, his sculptured jaw move as he smiled. The sentiment reached his eyes, a sparkle in them she'd only seen a few times in their sparse moments together: the night of their first few dates when they were teens; the night they first made love; and the night she'd seen him again just a month ago. Although, then it had only been brief, short moments when he'd let himself forget the world around them. Now, it seemed as if the sun had lit him from the inside, obscuring his usual darkness. Even his bulging shoulders, with the muscles so large and hard, seemed to go down an inch.

Only, the moment proved fleeting. His shoulders tensed back up to his ears, and his smile took on the look of a forced grimace. He looked sick, pale around his lips, his eyes darkened with hints of crimson. She watched his muscles tense, his ire rise in every feature of his face.

"What's wrong?" she asked quickly, making him jump, the boat he drove jerk a bit. "Are they here?"

"No one is here but the two of us. I even sent away the help," he added, a bit too quickly, his words bitten off with a sharpness of tone.

"Then what is it? You looked happy for a second."

"I want us to be honest here, Allanah. I want us to lay all of our cards on the table. Hold nothing back. I think it's the only chance we have to make this work, if we stop the secrets, even if the words are hard to get out, the secrets hard to let go of."

"I agree. I want the truth," she said, though a knot tied up in her stomach knowing she had secrets of her own she would have to tell him as well. "No need to spill them all right this minute, though. You could start with why you only managed to look happy we are here for about one or two seconds."

"My demon. He doesn't like the way you make me feel. It's something I'm dealing with, I promise, and why I want a way to get rid of the damnable thing for good. I've been trying to trick it, to let it see you as a forbidden, but, it only works so long before my love for you comes through and pisses it off again, makes it rise to the surface, try to force me to eradicate anything good."

"I don't understand exactly, but I'm trying. You can control it, though, right? You said I'm not in any danger here. Not from them, but not from you either? You didn't hurt me the other night. Guess you left before you could?"

"I left before I shifted in front of you, though that plan went to hell just moments later, but, no, I'm not going to hurt you. I will fight it before that happens. I would kill myself before I let anything happen to you. My demon is really threatened by you, more so than any women I've ever been with. Makes sense, I guess, the thing would hate any true feelings, and I love you, Allanah."

"I know, and I can only imagine that is true, a demon would hate love," she said, looking away from him and back to the paradise he had just stopped the boat at.

Though, she had to wonder if that was all there was to it, his demon's aversion to her. It would all come out soon enough, and then she wondered if she could maybe help him. Given the right timing, maybe her secret wouldn't go over so bad. Maybe there was hope for them. She let herself gulp in the clean air, relax. She wanted to be with him. Truly with him, and to try with everything in her to help him. For a second, she grew excited, in fact, to reveal her secrets to him, before she again feared his anger once he realized she'd had a secret longer than he had, from the beginning, that she'd not shared with him their first time around even.

"So, what do you think of this little paradise I arranged for us," he asked, trying to change the subject, she figured. He took her hand, helping her out of the boat at one of the many wooden walkways, while the energy in him slithered up her arm.

Her heart skipped a beat before beating faster, harder. Fear? Excitement? Who the hell could tell at this point.

"I don't think anything about it is little, for one. This whole place is ours?"

"Yes. Just ours. While there are three separate buildings, the place has three bedrooms, a private spa and bathroom with a hot tub, a kitchen, a dining room, a living room, and air conditioned gym. There are also numerous decks. And again, we have it all to ourselves as I even excused the two private butlers, arranging for meals to be prepared and in the refrigerator, as well as the bar stocked, before we got here today. I figured there would be no need to make beds. We have three rooms to use, one each night, and then other options. No one can see us anywhere while we are here."

"You plan to get lucky, then," she teased, ignoring the obvious issues they may have there if the other night was any indication.

"I'm hoping the romance of the place will convince you," he replied with an awkward, probably forced wink.

"It's just amazing. I'm literally speechless," she said, continuing the ruse, the happy couple in love with a few days in paradise together.

"Good. Then let's start by raiding the fridge, grabbing a bottle of wine, and hanging out on one of the decks as we just enjoy the sights, unwind, maybe even grab a nap after all the travels to get here. We can talk later. Let's take this first night to pretend we're just a normal couple in paradise, in love," he stated as if reading the words, though he'd echoed her thoughts.

"Sounds too good to be true, but let's give it a try anyway," she said, trying to make the truth sound like a tease. "Tomorrow will come soon enough to talk it all out."

Her secret could wait until then, just in case he did indeed get mad at her for not telling him right away the last two times they met, or when they had been together as teenagers, before they knew the world plotted against them. But, last week, there wasn't time, for one, and two, what difference would it have made? When they were teens, young and in love, thinking they had the rest of their lives together, she'd figured she'd had time to reveal all, hoping for the perfect moment, which never got a chance to come.

The place truly was indescribably amazing. Off the kitchen, a round deck consisted of a circular bench stuffed full of pillows all along the railing with a round table in the middle. After she'd settled in, feet up, she took in the three-sixty panoramic views of the water surrounding her and the villa.

Ciaran returned quickly with a cheese and fruit tray, a bottle of wine, and two wine glasses. "You should see that kitchen. I think there are enough of these types of platters for at least two a day, and, there are pastries and everything you can imagine for breakfasts, more fruit than we could ever consume in two weeks, sandwiches, salads, you name it. We are set as far as being full."

"This looks amazing. I just can't believe this view, the color of the water...all of it. Thank you for conning me into this. I've never had such a vacation before."

"You are welcome. I can't thank you enough for agreeing to come with me," he said, as he scooted in beside her until their bodies touched, and he could wrap his arm around her.

She moved, settled her back to his chest, cradled in his arms, and sighed. She figured she might as well take advantage of this time. This was too good of a vacation not to. She wanted to believe he could deliver everything he offered. At that moment, she resolved to just give in to it all, her every desire, her every whim, because this may never happen for them again. Consequences be damned, she would think of and deal with them after. The sun had surely fried her brain, but for the first time she didn't care. The place took her breath away, and obviously her ability to be cautious as well.

That way of thinking, of living in the moment, hadn't worked out for her last time, at his house, but here, in this place that felt not only private but a million miles away from the world, she felt it could.

"I'm not going to miss a moment of it," she said into the wind, trying to convince herself to stay in this moment, not think herself out of this happiness washing over her with each ocean breeze that bathed her skin.

"What?" he asked, turning her face to his.

"I don't want to miss a moment of this."

"Well, what has changed? Or wait, don't tell me. I'm going to just appreciate it instead," he said with a sigh and a smile.

She watched that subtle sweep of bright, blood red sweep over his eyes.

"And, I promise," he continued quickly, " I will take control of that. I managed to last time, so, please, don't fear what lives within me."

"I won't," she semi-lied. "You didn't hurt me last time, not in bed, or after you defended me against them, which is what I assumed you were doing. Regardless of what you were doing, which isn't the point, and I don't want to know right now. The point is, I trust you, Ciaran. I know, now, what kept us apart, and it wasn't for lack of us loving each other. In fact, we stayed apart, each of us, because of how much we loved each other, protecting the other. We were kids then, and you didn't even have that thing living in you."

"We are not kids now, and it does, but I have control over it. I promise you that. As I said earlier, I would kill myself before I hurt you."

"It wouldn't come to that, would it?" She shrieked, her hope of letting it all go for a moment already mangled.

"No. It won't come to that. Just saying. I just want you to feel safe. Relaxed. Loved."

"I do," she managed before his lips touched hers, lightly at first, teasing really, a few seconds of skin on skin, before moving away, hovering so close to hers she could still feel his energy.

She turned into him more then,  pressing her body, her chest against his. He kept teasing her with his lips, taking his time, showing more restraint than she believed she had. She heard him swallow hard before his lips pressed against hers more. His energy changed, felt off, making her shiver despite the sun warming her skin. She pulled back, used her hand against his chest to stop him from coming close again.

"What is it? Something's wrong again. Demon? I can't believe I just said that out loud." She sighed after swallowing hard over her dry throat.

"Yes. I don't get it. Last time it seemed to feed off the lust part of the equation, but this time it seems to be threatened. I'm just not sure by what? I guess the emotions, though I've been trying hard to focus on other parts of this. Still, I can hear the thoughts in my head. I can feel the monster trying to move me, make me take you fast and hard. Not that that is always a bad thing, but it has bad things in mind. It wants to hurt you, beyond a good way sexually. It slithers inside me, trying to fight all the overwhelming love I feel for you, I guess. The anger. It seethes. I would say it fears you, but that makes no sense. I'm sorry, this is literally uncharted waters for me." He quieted for a minute, sucking in a deep breath, then letting it out as he yelled, "I hate this thing! But, of course, this moment of anger, this he likes. Fuck!"

"Listen, Ciaran, let's just eat, appreciate this food and wine. Talk. Nothing big. Maybe discuss movies or books, or something else harmless. You probably both just need time to adjust. This is huge, us being here. It feels different than us being together at your house. I sense that. Your house was all shock and lust. The thing from hell probably liked that. Here, well, we have time to just be in love. Sure, it hates that. Listen, I am trying to silence my own reservations that tell me to guard my heart, my body, where you are concerned. We all have our demons, so to speak."

"You are so kind. A guy like me doesn't deserve you," he said with a half laugh, cut off as he shook his head. "I've been telling myself that for years as a default when I could find no way to have you. I'm sick of it, but what if it's the truth, the only truth I will ever know with this damned hell spawn inside of me?"

"Don't talk like that. You didn't ask for this thing, and I know you would cut it out in a second if you could. We just need to take it slow. We will figure it out, how to be together here, and how to be together forever."

He just looked at her, brows furrowed, eyes squinted.

"Hey," she continued, "a little positive thinking can't hurt, right?"

"I don't know. Letting a positive emotion in, letting it run rampant, not holding it back, may just be the problem. I'm doomed no matter what I try to do."

"Well then, I'll be positive for both of us. Not my usual where you are concerned, but hey, I'll give it a shot. This place is magic, makes me feel like anything is possible just sitting here, so I'll work on that end of things, and you work on yours whatever way you have to."

She had to wonder what about her threatened the thing inside of him, but she couldn't let herself go there fully right now. It would all be revealed soon enough, what she was, what, maybe, his demon felt threatened by. They'd agreed to not discuss this stuff until tomorrow, though, so she bit her lip to wait. She looked at the plate, took a cube of white cheese with some sort of seeded cracker thing, and turned back to the water. Feeding off of it, the sun, the subtle breezes, the fresh smells, the wondrous sights, she tried to find some semblance of calm to cover her rampant thoughts, and ease her raging libido. 

"I love you, Allanah," he hissed in her ear through clenched teeth.

"I love you, too, Ciaran. Always will, no matter what the future holds. You are it for me, my one and only. If nothing else, no matter how painful it can be when we are separated, we always have that. Most don't ever find their soul mate. At least we did. Some never know what we've known, even if we only had it short periods of time."

He kissed her forehead with a sudden haste before he grabbed at food, too.

They sat in silence, dealt with their own shit, picked at food, little by little, until the late afternoon turned to dusk. The sky took on unreal colors, as if a child had taken crayons and colored as hard as they could until the shiny wax built in layers of gold and orange at the horizon, while blues and pinks filled the rest of the sky. With the sunset reflecting on the water, they sat in the dark as what had to be solar lighting came on, outlining the wooden walkways, and each room, in small maize-colored lights.

"There is this amazing living room," he said, breaking the silence. "It's open air, a deck over water, basically, with a roof and large, flat screen TV. You want to give it a try? Just relax together for a bit longer? I've never felt so off, and I just need some more time."

"Sure. Lead the way, sir." She offered him a smile as genuine as she could, though something in her nagged, felt guilty for her part in whatever it was he was going through at the hands of the monster inside him.

She separated them in her mind, him and his demon, but she wondered how false that perception might be. Her mother had told her before that the demons had dangers, another 'safety clause' as Ciaran's father had referred to it. If a man gave in to it too much, he'd go insane, mad, for the rest of his life. If that descent into madness happened here, she wondered if she could protect herself, if she could get away on the boat. Shaking off the harrowing prospects, she looked to him as she sat on the couch, asking permission to cuddle up against him again.

"Please. Yes," he answered. "I want you close, but, for now, without all the other stuff until I work this out. I'm so sorry. I didn't feel like this at all the other night with you. I don't know what is different. Me? You? The place?"

"Maybe the lack of your brothers and work friends, all those in your circle leaving you alone. Doesn't the demon keep a link to the others? Maybe last time it just waited for them to come, and this time they aren't, right?"

"I don't really know. I guess until the other night, emotions had never been involved when with a woman. And, the other night, I felt a rush of so much, especially anger at my father for keeping us apart all those years. Here, I wanted to just let it come, the rush of emotions, being with you, in this place, far away and safe for a time,  but that's not working out. I'm being denied even the briefest moment of happiness by this thing."

"Guess the peace and love stuff pisses the thing off. But, if that's true, does no one in your circle love any woman?"

"No," he answered, pausing as she watched his eyes move as he thought it through. "No. They all wanted this damn thing. Waited to be of age for it. None of them had it in them to fall in love prior, I don't think. My brothers definitely not. They married for the arrangement, her looks and money, really, a union advantageous to them both. I know there is no love because as much as they act the part in public with their wives, the women are both shallow enough, enjoy the lifestyle enough, to have open marriages otherwise. My brothers fuck whoever they want whenever they want, with an arrogance and freedom that is sickening. I believe the others are all the same, married for the same pathetic reasons. It has always amazed me what some women will do, put up with, to live a life of luxury. The point is, they all wanted this demon. It made them all feel like men. The only thing they fight for is to keep it and their bank accounts."

"Oh, I know women like that. I never got the mind games they would have to play to be with their husbands, but they do. They even seem to enjoy life, too, despite the loveless marriages. The arrangements and perks suit them just fine. Maybe if we had not fallen in love so quickly as teens, actually as children, maybe we could have understood such a lifestyle choice, too."

"Maybe. But we did. So, now what?"

"You tell me. I don't know what you are feeling, how it feels. Do you feel out of control? Your whole body is tense, afraid or ready to fight. Why are you holding back from me?"

"It's the threats in my head. It threatens you, tells me to do things. I feel strong enough to ignore it, but where you are involved I will take no chances. I just want to go slow, to know you are always protected from that side of me."

"How do you live on a normal basis with that thing? Is everything you do dreadful enough to appease it? Sorry, I know that sounds bad, but you act like you've never threatened the thing and how it likes to live before."

"I guess, in a way, I haven't. I live making deals, making money, it likes the gluttony of that. The excessive parties, the women, have always suited it. Even when I think of getting away, I guess it feeds off the rebellion of that. And, I just have so much anger in me, so much resentment. I literally hate my father, a man who, dead or alive, I couldn't do anything about it all so it festers. I guess I do live a life that makes it happy, and that makes my skin crawl as much as the demon does."

"It sounds like torture, Ciaran," she said, cautiously reaching out to caress his face.

The crimson flashed in his eyes, stronger this time unless it was just the darkness, but she swore she felt the heat of the rage in her fingers. Everything about him clenched. She didn't know how to help him. The usual just seemed to upset him, or that being in him, more.

"I don't know what to do for you, or maybe what not to do for you. Tell me."

"I don't know," he said with a hiss, his hand coming to her face, but stopping just short of touching her, and trembling there as it hung in the air. "I can't hurt you, but making love to you, just the thought of gentle caresses, kissing you, angers it, and not in a good way, if that makes sense. Still, surely I've done some good in my years with this, some kindnesses. While I'd felt twinges, the beast trying to change my mind, it was nothing like this. Something is different about the way it's reacting inside of me. This is unexplored territory. So, until I understand it, I need to keep a distance, I guess. This isn't fair. I brought you all the way out here with no idea this would be so bad. I planned to go with the lust, appease it, but the thing is so frantic I can't even manage to do that. Irritated. Something. It's driving me nuts. It has to be me with you. I got touches of this the other nights, but not this extreme."

She grabbed his hand, then, hard, moved it down to her thigh. For some reason, something in him mellowed a second, as if a part of him, the demon part, she guessed, actually felt a sick and twisted sort of joy, was pacified by her anger, with the violent way she'd touched him.

"Wait a minute. When we were together before, it was fast, lustful, desperate, all things the demon would like, and it seems when it's happy, if you can call it that, or appeased, it leaves you be more. Is that right? We were rough and frantic at first, yet it still came, right? I guessed you felt something for me then."

"Yes. Well, I don't know. Something is just different, as if my father trained the thing to hate you, though that can't be it. I can't explain it. Although, I think the other night I still carried enough anger of all the time wasted being apart that it fed off of the rage for a time. This time I'm feeling hopeful, for the first time, that I could be with you, love you, and it hates all of that. Basically, this is my sick and twisted life, thanks to my father. See, even there, my hatred for the man makes it calmer, appeased, as you said. It has no alliances. Only when I am with the circle is it okay with any sort of alliance because it controls the other demons in the other men. It's a sick bastard I live with, that tries to control me."

"Okay, then let's give in to it, make it happy. I don't mind things a little rough. Just tap into your lust, your base desires, and take me hard. At least we can be together. I want you, Ciaran. At this moment, however I can have you."

Her stomach tightened, and she grew damper than she already was just saying the words.

"Believe me, I want you so bad right now that you would think a demon lived in me, too," she offered, trying to find the right words to convince him to take her. "I want you, now."

She moved toward him quickly, ignoring the way her mind threw out fearful thoughts. She went with the whole bad boy appeal thing, and seduced him, hard and fast. Pushing him back on the couch, she straddled him, tore at his thin shirt, baring his chest. Letting her nails dig in as much as they could to the mounds of muscle there, she bent down to bite at a nipple.

A growl grew in the back of his throat as his mouth came to hers, bit and sucked on the delicate skin until electricity buzzed through her, make her want him until she ached. In one graceful move, he grabbed her ass and stood up, holding her body to his as his mouth found hers, his tongue forced its way in, and the kissing grew deep and rough, heated. Her heart beat in double time as he walked them over the wooden walkways, until they hit a room with a bed in it. In the seconds she had opened her eyes, she could see the bed against another railing. Open air with a roof over their head, the place lent itself to the romance she couldn't have with him. Lanterns had not been lit here, but the lights around the walkways, the moon, gave them enough illumination.

He moved his hands to her sides and tossed her on the bed. Her breath caught, held until her lungs burned and forced her to gasp for air as he landed over top of her, on his knees, enough to shred her dress away. She screamed out as the material ripped over her flesh, bit for just a burning second, enough to stoke the fires within rather than extinguish them. She'd always had so much anger when it came to men that she'd never actually been a gentle lover, or taken to tender lovemaking.

Sinister noises emanated from deep in his chest as he took her hard and fast, ignited something in her as well. She let him set the pace as her body responded to the forceful entrance of his erection, the contractions starting immediately, hinting at the force of the impending orgasm that would soon take her.

Their kisses grew searing as she trembled in her need of him. She arched her back, slamming hip bones against hip bones, letting her know they were alive. She'd caught a glimpse of his red eyes, though he closed them fast and tight.

Am I fucking a man or a demon? Shot through her brain before she could stop it, and she let her own anger at the unknown fuel the fire.

His arms wound so tight around her she could barely breathe. Her nipples rubbed against his hard chest, igniting the tender flesh, filling her tightly coiled body with heat. She took her well-manicured fingers and let them dig into the flesh of his rapid moving ass. The firm muscles moved him in and out as she guided him, angling his hips, until he hit just the right spot.

They rolled right off the bed, hitting the floor with a breath stealing thump as they came together. Fever scorched her flesh, while her insides contracted and released. The sounds of their cries moved over the calm waters as their release took them both to a place they'd never been before, not even with each other. Once she hit that precipice, the pleasure almost maddening, another round of internal heat relaxed her, made her jelly in his arms. His grip still unbearably tight, she fought for breath as a growl started that he seemed to silence.

"Appeased?" she asked, her voice heavy with her own sated pleasure as the long day began to weigh on her.

"For now," he said. He lifted her from the floor like she weighed nothing and placed her gently on the bed. "You sleep."

She may or may not have fought him on that idea as sleep overwhelmed her.