Jessica

The demanding need to feel loved is strong. But is it love that I’m after? Jake claims to love me, he says his love is as real as it comes, but that doesn’t seem right either. With my eyes closed tightly, the memories of the day I came to live here in this house with him overwhelm me. Ten-years-old is a precious age. Moving from a home I’d always known, to one I wasn’t sure of, was hard. I wasn’t sure what to expect, and many times things didn’t always happen as they seemed. Jake was older than me by five years. At first, he was the perfect brother. He was sweet and caring. He watched out for me when we went to school. When my mom became distant, Jake moved in closer. Over the years I thought it was all in my head. The way he’d look at me. The way his eyes would move over my body. The way he could spot me, even in the shadows. At the time, I thought he was merely doing what any older brother would do.

Of course, that wasn’t the case. On my fifteenth birthday, he took me out for ice cream. My mom and his dad were off on some extravagant cruise that they claimed was for work purposes. I didn’t need to be lied to. I knew they wanted a vacation, but it hurt that she’d take one on my birthday. Nevertheless, Jake took care of me.

“Now that you’ve had ice cream, it’s time for your present,” Jake says with a smirk on his face. I try to gauge what it is that he’s doing. Over the years I’ve learned that Jake does nothing nice for anyone without expecting something in return, but he’s never asked anything of me.

“What is it?” I ask, full of interest. Jake grabs my hand, leading me into the eerily silent house. Dragging me along behind him and up the stairs, he stops in front of his bedroom door.

“I hope you know how much I care about you, Jess,” he says, his overwhelming presence commanding the air around us. I nod my head yes, but when his eyes darken, I wonder if I made a mistake. I did know that Jake cared about me, but the same silent glances he’d give me shook something inside of me. Ushering me into his room, he closes the door behind him, clicking the lock into place. My heart kicks up a notch, a tremble running through me.

“Take off your clothes, Jess.” His demand sends a shock through me. Take my clothes off? Why would I?

“What?”

“You heard me. I’m your present, Jess. You’re mine. Take them off.” The deep rumble of his voice makes me shudder. Pure evil dances in those blue eyes of his. I’m trembling, not only on the outside but the inside as well. When I don’t move, Jake does. He moves quickly through the room, grabbing the front of my shirt and tearing it off.

“Stop! I don’t want this, Jake.” I cry, but there is no one to hear me.

“I didn’t ask you that. You’ll grow to love me, Jessica. It’ll take time, but I have time to give.” He rips my shorts down my legs even as I fight him. I throw a kick that lands on his shin and that’s when everything changed. That’s the moment I became a little more submissive. His hand slammed into the side of my head, stars blanketing my vision. I blink repeatedly trying to pull my focus back as Jake shoves me onto the bed.

“Please, Jake,” I beg him. Mistake. I should have never begged him. Blinking his face back into focus, I see the smirk. It’s wrong. So. Fucking. Wrong.

“You want me, Jessica. You won’t admit it, but I’ve seen you look at me.” Yanking his clothes off in a hurry, he climbs on the bed, shoving his way between my legs. Pulling my panties to the side, he roughly shoves a finger inside of me. I gasp and scream but his free hand comes to surround my neck. The air is squeezed from my lungs. My eyes water as tears fall, but I can’t stop what’s happening to me. Jake’s fingers plunge in and out of me until he’s satisfied. Pulling his fingers free, he licks them all before sitting up.

“Now you get your real present,” he growls, forcing his dick inside of me.

I remember the pain like it was yesterday. He took my virginity with his body, then once more with the handle of my hairbrush. Those weren’t the only things he’d fucked me with. Over the years, everything became a weapon. He would use anything and everything that was lying around; my curling iron, which I thank God to this day had time to cool after I’d used it, his fingers, his tongue… everything. The thought alone causes a chill to work up my spine. I hate Jake for what he’s done to me. I hate that he takes and takes and there’s nothing I can do to stop it. Everything I’ve tried has failed. At first, I’d tell him I was on my period, hoping that he’d leave me alone; but as sick as it sounds, he knows when I start and when I stop. He has it memorized. That alone should tell me how sick he truly is, but there’s still a part of me that cares about him. There’s still that lingering feeling that he’s my brother and I should have some feelings for him. Feelings like normal siblings do. He’s ruined me though. In more ways than one. Taking my virginity was the least of them. He’s stolen my mind.