AJ watched the sun come up through the windshield of her car. Her back was aching from sleeping on the bench seat. There was a seat belt digging into her hip. Her feet were freezing cold and the rest of her was burning hot.
She’d never been happier in her life. In her entire life. She had never felt more fulfilled or excited or content before. Ever.
Because Anton was fast asleep, mostly on top of her. His head cradled in between her breasts and her legs wrapped around his waist.
They’d rolled and sucked and kissed and fucked for half the night before they’d fallen into an exhausted heap.
Until it was gone, AJ hadn’t realized how heavy her chronic melancholy had been. Living without Anton had been a cloud over her life for as long as she could remember. She’d started to think it was part of who she was. But now, with his heavy body on top of hers, she realized that it was merely a symptom. Not a part of her personality.
Her mind skittered back over the sex they’d had.
First of all, she had SEX.
Second of all, she had SEX WITH ANTON.
Third, and perhaps most importantly, she’d had SEX WITH ANTON AND IT WAS SO GOOD SHE WAS PRETTY SURE SHE’D SEEN SATURN.
She’d given up hope on him a long time ago. But part of her had known, always known, that this thing would be good if they just gave it a shot.
AJ shook her head slightly and ran a hand over her eyes. If he hadn’t been lying on top of her, she might have had trouble even believing it had happened. She’d been waiting for it for so long that it was almost strange to have it be real.
“Why are you awake?” Anton grumbled into one of her breasts. Coming awake enough to realize where he was, he nuzzled into her, making her giggle.
“Because I’m an early bird. And I don’t think this truck was designed for a solid nine hours anyways.”
Anton grunted, rubbed his stubble against her and rolled to one side. “I sleep on top of you,” he frowned, his eyes still half closed. “That is no good.”
“You kept me warm,” she said, stretching her body like a cat. She was very obliged to watch his face heat as he let his eyes laze over her. The light was still dim in the truck, but it was light enough to see plenty of details.
“You need more sleep in your bed,” Anton said, sitting up and fishing around for their underwear. “And I need more sleep. In your bed.”
“You’re coming to my bed?” she asked, a thrilled humming working its way through her blood. Anton in her bed? It was something she’d only daydreamed about. And here he was, casually suggesting it like it was no big deal. She felt like the truck was a cozy little cocoon and for the first time in either of their lives, they were safe together.
“Da,” he answered. “I come to your bed. And then you come in your bed. Over and over.” He gave her a wicked grin before he grabbed her sweater and started to drag it over her head. He froze halfway through.
“Anton?” Her voice was muffled by the sweater over her face but she felt his finger trace a sensitive little part of her skin along her collar bone. And then another over her breast. At her hip. She tried to pull the sweater the rest of the way down, but instead he yanked it off.
And not in a sexy way. When she caught sight of his face he looked crazed. Heated and furious and… in pain.
“Anton, what is it?”
He just looked down at her again, his fingers tracing patterns on her. She followed his gaze to where she saw a series of bite marks across her breasts and collar bone, one on her hip.
“I,” he cleared his throat. “I bit you.”
“Yes,” she said carefully. Something was happening and she wasn’t sure what. “I liked it. It felt good.”
“AJ,” he scoffed, and it didn’t pass her notice that he used her nickname. “I leave bruises on you.”
He rolled her to one side and touched a few more places on her ass, the inside of her legs. Each new mark he found he let out a small, unhappy noise.
“It’s okay, Anton, really. It felt good. Tight. You were holding me so close and-”
“I hurt you!” he burst out. “With my hands. With my mouth.” He made a sound of disgust. “With my teeth.”
She scrambled to sit up and pulled the sweater on, hiding the offending marks. This was getting out of hand fast. She had the terrifying feeling that he was sliding away from her, like a wineglass on the deck of a ship, and if she didn’t catch him now, there was no catching him.
“Anton, it wasn’t like that. Don’t make it sound so bad.”
“AJ, it is bad. I fuck you on side of road. I steal your virginity. I lose control. Hurt you.” He dropped his head in his hands, his breath coming quickly. “This is nightmare.”
“Having sex with me was a nightmare?” She could barely choke out the words. They tasted like poison in her mouth. This could not be happening. She felt the walls of the cocoon they’d created becoming thinner and thinner. Pretty soon, they’d just be two people again, who either were glad they’d done what they did. Or not.
“That is not what I say,” Anton snapped, his head coming up out of his hands. “You are beautiful girl. My bahinia. You deserve better than this. Better than me.”
Panic grabbed at AJ’s throat like a boa constrictor. She could barely speak past it. “No, Anton, don’t say that. You’re everything to me. You act like you’re bad but-”
“I am no good for you,” he cut her off. And in the next moment he’d kicked open the driver’s side door. The cocoon was gone forever as the cold morning air seeped into the cab of the truck.
“Anton, don’t do this,” she pleaded, reaching one hand out for him.
“I am no good for you,” he repeated. To his credit, he held her eyes as he shifted into his grizzly form with a grunt. He towered over the truck for a second before he fell forward to all fours and set off into the forest. He didn’t look back.