Except for the daily medical checkup, they’d hardly left the bed in the last three days, and even now he wanted back in. Hell, he never wanted to leave her again. Not even for a second. But Blade had been called to Headquarters to report on Valli’s progress with Raphael. He’d had a brief, crazy desire to decline the invitation.
Thankfully, he wasn’t suicidal.
No one said no to the leader of the Suits. Not if they wanted to keep their manly parts intact. Besides, he understood Raphael’s need to be assured that the Healers had declared Valli healthy and untainted by the time she’d spent in Benson’s clinic. Not to mention to make sure the cub was growing well.
Done and done.
Now, as he stepped out of the sprawling Headquarters and shifted into his puma form, gliding through the cypress trees, he felt wonderfully alive and happy for the first time in as far back as he could remember. His large paws padded on the mossy ground with lethal silence, his tail twitching, while around him the wetland was stirring to life as the morning sun crested the horizon to spill a golden warmth through the thick canopy of leaves.
It felt glorious to release his cat, absorbing the magic that surrounded him. But as much as he enjoyed spending the morning running through the bayou, nostrils flared and on the hunt for prey, he had someone waiting for him at home.
Home.
For the first time in his life, his small cottage wasn’t just a place to sleep when he wasn’t traveling around the world.
Now it was filled with his female and soon-to-be cub.
He was already considering how he could build on a new kitchen and playroom, not to mention filling it with new furniture and frilly curtains.
Bypassing the communal center, he loped down the narrow trail, pausing to resume his human form before he was in sight of his cottage. Valli was starting to get used to being surrounded by people who turned into pumas, but he tried not to do it without warning her first.
The shift complete, he was about to walk through the thick foliage that surrounded his private garden when a male appeared from the shadows. One that always seemed to be spying on his ass as of late.
“You have a shit-eating grin on your face,” Hiss drawled. “I’m assuming that your female has decided you’re not the enemy?”
Blade arched a brow. Did he have a shit-eating grin? Probably.
It’d been attached to his lips since he’d claimed Valli.
“Let’s just say that I’m enjoying the process of convincing her that I’m one of the good guys.”
Hiss nodded. “And the cub?”
Warmth filled his heart. It happened each time he thought of the child growing in Valli’s belly. How could he be this lucky?
“Healthy, thank the Goddess.”
Hiss reached out to grasp his shoulder. “I’m happy for you, Blade. I truly am,” he said, sincerity glowing in his eyes. “You’ll discover a mate can soothe wounds you thought would never heal.”
Mate. The word whispered through Blade’s mind, touching a raw nerve that he’d been trying hard to pretend didn’t exist. His smile faded.
“Thanks.”
Hiss stilled, his grip tightening on Blade’s shoulder. “What’s wrong, mon ami?”
“Nothing.”
Hiss snorted. “Blade, I’m the one person in the Wildlands who will never judge you,” he said in wry tones. “Lesson. Fucking. Learned.”
Blade hesitated. He didn’t want to talk about his inner fears. It was as if speaking them out loud would make them true.
Then he gave a small shake of his head. Maybe talking with Hiss would help alleviate the unease that felt like a lead ball in the pit of his stomach.
“I know that I can stir Valli’s passions,” he said.
Hiss studied him with an unwavering gaze. “A good start.”
“A great start,” Blade corrected. Just the memory of Valli’s lips skimming down his body last night was enough to send jolts of white-hot pleasure through him. “And I know that she’s devoted to our child,” he continued. More than once he’d watched as Valli had touched her swelling stomach, her face soft with an expression that belonged solely to a mother.
Hiss hesitated, as if wondering why Blade wasn’t dancing with joy. Then his gaze flickered toward the nearby cottage before returning to Blade.
“But you’re not certain she’s devoted to you?” he at last surmised.
Blade clenched his jaw. He was right. Speaking the words out loud did make them worse.
“How can you be sure with a human?” he demanded. “Our people are driven by a mating instinct. We know beyond a shadow of a doubt that we belong together.”
He didn’t add that he’d been desperately waiting for some sign that Valli had committed herself fully to him. Even he knew he was being idiotic.
After all, what sign could she show him?
Writing him a sappy love song? Tattooing his name on her ass?
Still, it was just so…frustrating.
If she was a Pantera, he’d be able to sense if she’d given herself to the mating. But with a human there was nothing tangible to hold onto. And worse, he sensed that she was keeping a distance between them.
Not physically. She was as passionate as he could ever desire. But there was a part of her that remained elusively out of reach.
It was why he’d never used the word “mate” to her. Even though every time she kissed him, touched him...every time he was inside of her or fuck, just holding her hand as they watched the sunset on the porch, he’d wanted to.
“Humans can be just as loyal.” Hiss broke into his dark thoughts. “We’ve seen that with our own eyes.”
It was true. Lately the Pantera had brought many humans into the Wildlands. They had proven to be devoted mates and treasured assets to the pack.
“Yes.” He spoke his worse fear. “I just feel like she’s holding something back from me.”
“Give her time,” Hiss commanded. “She’s been through hell. She needs time to heal.”
Blade grimaced. Logically he knew it’d only been a few days, far too soon for a human female to feel comfortable with the dramatic changes in her life. Especially after all that Valli had endured.
But logic had nothing to do with a male who was eager to mate.
“My cat doesn’t want to be patient,” he muttered.
Hiss dropped his hand and stepped back, a small smile curving his lips.
“Then be a man until she’s ready for your beast,” he said.
Blade scowled, watching as Hiss turned and sauntered down the trail.
Be a man? What the hell was that supposed to mean?
Growling deep in his throat, Blade resisted the urge to dismiss the words. Maybe Hiss was right. Being in the Wildlands meant that his cat was much closer to the surface than when he was moving around in the outside world. Perhaps his female needed to know that he could be human as well.
So what did human males do to win the hearts of their females?
A slow smile curved his lips.
Romance.
Ah, yes...
A candlelit dinner. Flowers. Soft music so he could hold her close as they danced.
Yes. He would create a night that would sweep her off her feet. And then he would get down on one knee as a man would do, and ask her to be his mate.
But for that, he was going to need help.
Pivoting on his heel, he shifted back into his cat and took off through the trees and back to the communal center.