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Harper (Destined for the Alpha Book 1) by Viola Rivard (11)

Chapter 10

Harper woke to Shan whispering her name. She opened her eyes enough to see that it was still dark, and then promptly shut them.

He said her name again, this time sounding less cajoling and more authoritative.

“Harper. It's time to get up. We'll be late.”

She swatted her arm in his direction. Her hand came in contact with something that felt like flesh, which was satisfying.

“Jerk. I was having a good dream.”

“Were you?” he asked, sounding amused.

She couldn't recall exactly what it was about. Already, the images were taking flight from her mind, though she could clearly see her brother's face, or at least, what she remembered of it. She'd read once that each time a person recalled a memory, it became slightly distorted. After that, she'd deliberately tried to stop thinking of her brother, for fear that she would be destroying what was left of him, bit by bit.

But in her dream, he had seemed so real, so whole and perfect. She had heard his voice, smelled his scent, and felt his hand in hers.

Abruptly, Harper shot up, her hand flying to her head.

“I had a good dream!”

Her shouting made Shan wince.

“Is it that unusual?”

Harper didn't answer him. When she'd sat up, she'd thrown off the pelt that had been covering the both of them. The early-morning sky provided just enough light for her to be able to make out most of the details of Shan's naked body.

“Holy shit.”

Either out of modesty or habit, Shan moved to cover himself with his pelt. Harper thwarted his efforts, grabbing the other end of the pelt and lifting it so that she could continue her viewing.

“Harper,” he said crossly.

She dropped the pelt at once and held up her hands as though at gunpoint. “Sorry, that was rude. It's just that you're so...”

Before she could complete her thought, Shan tackled her, pinning her to the bed with his heavy body. Even if she'd been prepared, she didn't think she could have evaded him in such close quarters. She also didn't particularly want to.

“I'm so, what?” he asked, his mouth hovering over hers.

Harper wet her lips. “Do you honestly need me to say it?”

His voice turned husky. “I would enjoy hearing you say it.”

Harper laughed and tried pushing him off, though she didn't try all that hard.

“Well, I don't have to worry about becoming your mate,” she said wryly. “It would be like trying to cross a poodle with a Great Dane.”

Shan cocked a brow. “You are no poodle.”

He kissed her. This time, she expected it, anticipated it, but was still unable to take control. What was more, she quickly found herself losing control of her body. She opened beneath him, her arms going around his neck, her legs coming up to bracket his hips, pulling him close. Her breath hitched as she felt the tip of him press against her center, and she wasn't sure if she was grateful or frustrated that she was wearing pants. She bucked against him, her body instinctively seeking friction. Shan obliged, settling himself between her legs so that she rubbed against him.

Harper fisted his hair, needing to keep her hands busy. If left idle, they'd be reaching down to grasp and stroke him, to pull her pants down, and to guide him to her entrance. She didn't know if he would fit, but she sure wanted to feel him try. She wanted to know what it would feel like to have him inside of her. She wanted to hear the sound he made when he came.

A gentle nip at her bottom lip was all the warning she had before Shan was pulling away. This time, she managed not to whimper, but just barely. She kept her grip on his hair, trying to show him what she was unwilling to say.

Don't stop.

“Not yet,” Shan said. He stroked the side of her face taking some, but not all, of the sting from his rejection.

Harper released him at once and wriggled from beneath him. She worked quickly to compose herself, a miraculous feat considering she'd been on the edge of climax from dry humping.

“You don't have to tell me that,” she said, combing her fingers through her tangled hair. “You're the one that keeps kissing me. I'm just being polite about it.”

In his usual manner of cutting through her bullshit, Shan said, “If we did it now, you would regret it.”

She huffed at him. “I don't know what kind of women you're used to sleeping with, but I don't have weird hangups about sex. If I want to have sex, I have it, and I enjoy it. If I don't want it, I say no, and that's it. I don't need you deciding what I can and

“Where are your clothes? The ones that fit you properly?”

Shan had clearly stopped listening to her, so she gave up.

“I left them at West's camp,” she sighed.

“What are they doing there?”

The was a slight edge to the question, and she knew that it was possessiveness. There must have been something screwed up in her head, because she got a weird sense of pleasure from making him jealous. She knew she could press on that soft spot, but she had no idea what would happen if she did. He might be baited into staking his claim on her then and there, or he might decide she was too juvenile to be worth his time.

Neither option was entirely appealing. As badly as she wanted him, now that there was a sliver of distance between them, she recognized that he was right. Having sex now would be a very bad idea, and she would absolutely regret it once her climax had ebbed to an end. And although she did want him to give up on the notion of courting her, she didn't want him to think less of her.

Not that that wasn't inevitable.

Part of the reason she wasn't panicking over Shan's declaration to court her was that she knew he'd get sick of her, and fast. It was the way things always went for her. It wasn't just that she got tired of whoever she was dating. The closer she got with someone, the more abrasive she tended to get. It was a defense mechanism—one that she hated, but often felt powerless to control. She had to push people away in order to find out who was willing to come back.

“It's where I got changed yesterday. My clothes were wet from the rain.”

Shan seemed satisfied with her answer. He picked up one of the furs from the bed and wrapped it around her shoulders.

“Wear this for now. I'll ask around and see if any of the taller females have clothes they can spare. Once we're home, I'll have new clothes made for you.”

“You don't have to do that,” Harper said, knowing full well that he wouldn't be dissuaded. “And is this really necessary? Are you that worried about people seeing my belly button?”

Shan nodded towards the entrance. “It's snowing out.”

“No way!” She scrambled forward to peek around the corner, and then groaned. “Ugh. The leaves haven't even fallen yet. I really hate snow.”

“I love it,” Shan said. “But this time, I'm inclined to agree with you. It's too early. Doesn't bode well for winter.”

The fur had fallen from her shoulders, and Shan's arms came up around her to secure it at her neck. Her pulse quickened as his lips grazed the side of her head.

“Keep this on. Put your shoes on and meet me outside.”

Harper took her time putting her shoes on. She felt lightheaded and, in spite of the weather, giddy.

She knew it was Shan's attention that was fucking with her head. She tried reframing the situation, reminding herself that although she'd slept beside him for three nights now, she'd really only spent four or five conscious hours with him. She barely knew him, which meant that anything she felt for him was entirely biological. He was the biggest, strongest, and sexiest man she'd ever met, and her limbic system simply couldn't handle it. It had gone into overdrive, firing up her endocrine system and unleashing its entire arsenal of hormones.

It's all in your head, she reminded herself. You don't want to make babies with him. You don't even like babies. You like ice cream, high-rise hotels, and Game of Thrones, none of which you can have if you make babies with him.

He was waiting for when she stepped out into the snow. His eyes did a slow perusal of her body, lingering on her neck before meeting her gaze.

“Where are we going?” she asked.

“Farther up the mountain, to the west,” he said, as if that told her much of anything. He approached her as he spoke, and put his arm around her waist, resting his hand on her hip.

“We can't walk around like this,” she said, swatting at his hand. “People will get the wrong idea.”

Shan guided her forward, his hand remaining firmly in place. “Wrong by whose standards? Perhaps I want to give them a particular idea.”

Harper shook her head. “Geez, you don't forget anything, do you?”

“I don't.”

The snow hadn't been falling long. A skiff dusted the trees and the ground, making Harper's footsteps crunch as she walked. Like most shifters, Shan walked barefoot through the snow, not seeming the least bit discomforted by it. A combination of warm blood and superior circulation meant that even shifters in arctic conditions could go barefoot without fear of losing extremities to frostbite.

Their path kept them clear of the encampments, for which Harper was glad. She liked having Shan's arm around her, but she couldn't have Ian or Jo seeing it. She could only imagine the lecture she'd get from Jo, or the dirty looks Ian would give her if either of them suspected that she was in any way involved with Shan. Now that they'd been reunited, she was already bracing herself for questions about where she was sleeping at night.

With the way Shan was treating her, it felt like exposure was inevitable, and she had no idea how she was going to explain herself. She had to figure out a way to tell him, in no uncertain terms, that she didn't want to be courted by him.

Shan, I know I'm incredibly attracted to you and I keep stalking you in your den and falling asleep next to you, and now we're making out and you're probably the best kisser I've ever met, but I definitely don't want you to try to convince me to be your mate because it's hopeless; I'm not interested.

Yeah, that would go over well.

She'd never been in this situation before. Most men gave up at the first sign of rejection, usually because their egos couldn't handle a second burn. She couldn't figure out why Shan was so insistent about courting her, though she suspected he saw the chinks in her armor. While she was verbally rejecting him, her body might as well have been shooting off flares and flashing neon lights. If she could just put some distance between them, she might be able to gain some objectivity.

Their destination turned out to be a bluff on the mountainside. It was smooth and flat, with only a single tree perched on the cliffside. Waiting beneath the tree was West, garbed in several layers of gray furs, and a tall red headed female that Harper recognized as one of Shan's frequent companions.

They seemed as surprised to see Harper as she was to see them. The female gave Shan a curious look, her nostrils flaring. Harper could only imagine what she must have been smelling.

Shan gestured to each of them. “Harper, you know West. This is Eko. She is one of my betas and the leader of my hunters.”

Eko looked to be in her early-forties, with an attractive face, long neck, and pale skin. She didn't look like she could beat Harper at arm-wrestling, let alone be the leader of the hunters, but if Shan had made her his beta, she must have been skilled.

Harper slipped her hand from beneath her fur and offered it to Eko. The shifter female gave a slight bow as she shook her hand, something that Harper might have liked under any other circumstances. She doubted Eko knew anything about her education or why she'd come to the pack, and probably just assumed she was going to become Shan's mate.

Shan continued, “Harper was the one to suggest that our neighbors to the south may have two alphas.”

Eko nodded to herself. “You mentioned something about that yesterday.” She looked at Harper. “How did you come to that conclusion?”

For a second, Harper felt put on the spot, but the moment she began speaking, the words flowed from her naturally. She told Eko what Shan had mentioned about the southern pack, particularly how unpredictable its actions were, and how its alpha seemed to be at once a shrewd diplomat and a barbaric warmonger.

“It's not unprecedented,” Harper said. “There are cases of male siblings leading packs together. Also, it's possible that there is a male and female alpha. There was a documented pack in Canada where a male alpha co-led the pack with a female shifter, rather than taking a human mate.”

“Really?” Eko sounded intrigued. “Well, I doubt that's the case here. The alpha, or alphas, had a mate alliance with the nearby town a few years back. I doubt any self-respecting female would put up with that, but there is the possibility of brothers. We've seen that before.”

West nodded. “It makes sense. In the beginning, we thought that there were two different packs, but the scent markers are consistent and our scouts have determined their migration patterns.”

Shan said, “They reside in the northern part of the territory for most of the year, and travel south during the winter.”

“Are they in the south now?” Harper asked.

“Not yet,” said West. “We've spotted them in the woods as recently as two days ago. The edge of their territory is just over this mountain.”

“Aren't you worried you're going to provoke them?” she asked.

Shan lifted a shoulder. “We're far enough out that they'd have to be looking for conflict if they approached us. Right now, we only want them to be aware that we're here and encourage them to make contact.”

“Why, though? What's your plan?”

For a second, no one answered, and in that short span of time, Harper recognized the weirdness of the situation. She was standing on a mountainside before dawn, discussing what was most likely very sensitive, high-level information with the leaders of the largest shifter pack in the world. Her lightheadedness returned just as Shan gave West a nod.

West said, “I'm sending a final emissary today. If the pack responds and agrees to meet, we'll make those arrangements, ideally before nightfall. If they continue to be unresponsive, we're going to return to the Steppes until spring. Once the growing season has passed, we'll enter their territory by force.”

“And your allies?” Harper asked. “The ones that are bordering this pack? Are they going to be safe?”

Shan seemed surprised, and then pleased that she'd remembered that detail. His hand ran up her back as he spoke, stroking her spine.

“Wisteria's pack is about three days south of here. Eko and Gareth will be assembling a team of fighters to stay with them through the winter, regardless of whether we make contact today.”

No longer able to focus with his hand on her, Harper took a not-so-subtle step away from Shan before responding.

“So, assuming you're able to bring them to the table, what are you expecting? A treaty? Some sort of pact? Fealty?”

Eko said, “To start, we will expect their alpha to answer for the crimes of territory seizures and murder.”

“Murder?” Harper repeated. She pursed her lips. “Is that really a crime in your pack? I don't mean it as an insult, it's just that in my experience, that's kind of the way shifters operate. When one pack wants the territory of another, they take it, by any means necessary.”

No one seemed offended.

Eko explained, “Killing, in and of itself, is not a crime among our people. But the killing has to be warranted. Our definition of murder is a killing that is without just provocation.”

“That seems pretty open-ended,” Harper said. “But, is it really fair to hold other shifters to the standards of your laws? Especially when they don't know them and are just acting on instinct?”

Eko asked, “If this alpha was slaughtering children, would you be asking if it was fair to hold him to our standards of not slaughtering children, or would you be calling for his head?”

“I guess that's a fair point,” Harper said. “But there are a lot of lines between territory seizure and killing kids.”

Eko smiled at Shan, the corners of her eyes crinkling. “I never thought our laws would seem strict by human standards.”

“I have a broader perspective than most humans,” Harper said.

West appeared less amused. “If you had two towns, and the residents of one town decided to take the other town by force, killing all who stood in its path, wouldn't you hold the aggressing town accountable? And if not the whole town, at least the leadership that called for the attack?”

Put into those terms, it made a lot more sense, and Harper felt embarrassed for even questioning it in the first place.

Shan's hand came down on her shoulder. “Don't be ashamed. You're not the first person to hold their kind to the standards of animals, rather than those of men. They hold themselves to those standards. They resent humans for treating them like animals, but they behave no better than the common wolf.”

Eko added, “Our laws may seem strict, but only because before, there were no laws. If no one is willing to draw the line and enforce standards on our kind, then there can be no hope for us.”

Shan's arm came to settle around her shoulders and Harper wasn't sure if he had stepped closer to her, or if she had moved to him. In any case, he was warm and she couldn't bring herself to pretend that she didn't want his touch.

“What's the punishment, then?” Harper asked.

“Execution.”

“And you expect him to just turn himself over?”

“It does happen,” Shan said. “Usually, it is the pack turning their alpha over in order to gain amnesty for itself. When we return home, I will have you meet with my adjudicators. They will show you all of our laws, and their repercussions.”

The prospect excited her. The evolution of law within an isolated society had been precisely what she'd come to study, and she was eager to devour any information she could get on the subject.

Time passed quickly after that. Harper was able to trace the passage of time by the sun, the outline of which she could just make out beyond the clouds. As it began its ascent, the snow turned to a light sprinkling of rain, turning what little snow had accumulated into wet slush.

The topic changed to the upcoming migration back to The Steppes. Harper had no input to offer, but she still enjoyed listening to the logistics of moving such a large pack.

As the meeting came to a close, Shan tasked Eko with making the announcement that they'd be leaving before dawn, tomorrow. Eko promised to relay the information after the hunt, and asked Shan if he'd be joining them.

“Not today,” Shan said.

They were his parting words as he turned away, his arm guiding Harper into following suit. She tried waving over her back, but West and Eko were already shifting, their human bodies giving way to a brown wolf and a wolf that was fox-like in color.

“Let's try to find you some proper clothes,” Shan said.

“Is that your gift?”

“You've already received my gift.”

Harper frowned and glanced around, wondering what she might be missing.

Shan said, “You spent the morning with two of the leaders of my pack, getting to know them, and how they think and plan.”

The entire time, she'd been thinking she'd lucked out with them running into Eko and West. It only just occurred to her that the meeting had been planned and that Shan had intentionally brought her to it.

“You enjoyed yourself,” he said, sounding satisfied.

Harper shrugged, not wanting to admit even to herself how much she'd liked it.

“As my mate, you'll come to have a stake in the decisions of my pack. You'll be included in our discussions and planning. All of the politics you could ask for, with none of the pageantry.”

Harper salivated at the thought.

“That sounds great,” she croaked. “I'll admit, you're good at this whole courting thing, but you should really invest your energy in a woman that's interested.”

“I'm glad to know I'm doing well,” he said. “I haven't done this before.”

She glanced up at him. “I'm the first person you've courted?”

The smile he gave her was positively smug. “If I'd courted anyone else, I'd already have a mate.”

“I don't doubt it,” she said, unable to stop from grinning. “But I really can't. I enjoyed that meeting and I...well, I guess it's pretty obvious that I enjoy spending time with you. But I have things that I want, things I've wanted for a long time and that I can't have if I spend the rest of my life here.”

Shan stopped and placed his hands on her shoulders. “I have no doubt that there are many things you wanted before you came here, just as I did. My intention is not to dismiss your desires, but to show you the things you what you want pale in comparison to what I have to offer.”

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