Chapter Eleven – Elizabeth

“Louise and Zak make a wonderful couple,” Elizabeth said to Dean as he drove his truck up into the mountains. She’d never been this deep into the wilderness, but the sight of the big tall pines towering above them, and the glimpses of expansive views through gaps in the trees, gave her a thrill of excitement.

“They are. I’ve been blessed to share a part of their lives with them.” He steered his truck skillfully around a tight bend in the road. “You don’t mind me helping them out so much?”

Elizabeth turned to Dean, not knowing how to phrase her words. She didn’t want to hurt his feelings or make their relationship out to be less than it was, but she also couldn’t let him think she was some jealous, overbearing girlfriend. She smiled. She wasn’t exactly a girl anymore.

“We’ve only just met, Dean. Louise and Zak were a big part of your life before you found me, and they will be a big part of your life forever. Just as Suzie will be part of my life. We each have ties, we each have loyalties to other people. We have baggage.” She turned back to watch the view unfold before them. “There is us. And there are the other people we love. There is room for both.”

He chuckled. “Well said. It’s a little more complicated for me. My shifter blood pumps hot in my veins, and if I had my way, I’d likely carry you off to a cave somewhere and make a den, and never share you with another person again.”

“Oh.”

He chuckled. “It’s a primal animalistic drive to procreate and protect you. Luckily, I do have it under control.”

“I never knew it was that powerful.” A thrill of excitement passed through Elizabeth. Not that the idea of being carried off by a bear shifter was a thing she wanted. Hell, she would kick and scream enough to wake the whole mountain if that happened. Yet what woman would not appreciate being desired by a man so strongly he would practically do anything for you?

“Very powerful.” He pulled the truck over to the side of the road. There was a small clearing just about big enough to park the truck. Around them was nothing but mountain and trees.

“Is this it?” Elizabeth asked, heat prickling along her spine at the thought of being out here in the middle of nowhere with Dean after his last admission.

“It is. The trail leads through the trees, and we come out on a plateau that overlooks the town. You aren’t scared of heights, are you?” Dean asked as he got out the truck and went to the back to fetch the picnic that he’d packed into a backpack.

“No, not at all.” She looked around while he put the pack on and adjusted the straps. “Funny, I’m afraid of so many things in life, but wide open spaces are not one of them. It’s confined places that make me scared. The more people are in those confined spaces, the worse it is.”

“Then welcome to heaven.” He gave her a wink and a smile. “This is my domain, the place where I grew up exploring.”

“Then I’m honored to share it with you.” She genuinely was. Coming here with Dean was as if he was opening himself up to her, allowing her a sneak peek at the man underneath the hard-toned exterior. She knew about the softer side of him, the side that cared for kids, but this was his primal side, the part of him that simmered under the surface.

Dean led the way to the trail, and she followed behind, inhaling the scent of pine needles and damp earth. It made her feel safe, as if the tall trees were watching over her. Elizabeth wondered if there were real wild bears and other creatures in the forest, or just shifters. It would be weird as hell to come across a bear and not know if it was a shifter.

“Is there any way to tell the difference between a shifter and a real animal?” Elizabeth asked.

“Not really. Not unless you are a shifter yourself. I can tell by scent. For a human, it’s more tricky. I mean, often you can tell, because a shifter animal will be non-aggressive, and more likely than not scent you first and avoid you completely. We’re more discreet than wild animals, because we know one wrong move and a hunter could put a bullet in our brain.”

“Wow.” She was shocked at that.

“Not that hunting is encouraged around these parts. In fact, Sheriff Brad tries to discourage any kind of hunting.” Dean swung around and walked backward a few steps. “There are rabbit shifters, and bird shifters too. So any animal killed up here might be a shifter.”

“This whole area should be made into a nature conservation area,” Elizabeth suggested.

Dean nodded. “You know, that is a great idea.” He stopped on the edge of the trees and looked around. He was happy, relaxed, at home here. “We’re careful what gets built in town, we’ve tried to keep any new developments to a minimum. But the world around us marches on.”

“This should be preserved.” Elizabeth stood beside him, taking in the view down the steep slope to the valley below.

“I’ll talk to Ronni over at the Animal Sanctuary in Bear Bluff. She’s always been the champion of these kind of things.” He nodded, and then put his arm around Elizabeth’s shoulder. “This is my world.”

She leaned her head on his shoulder. “I want to be a part of it, more than I’ve ever wanted to be a part of anything in my life.” Tears pricked her eyes and she couldn’t blink them away before they trickled down her cheeks.

“Are you OK?” Dean asked.

“Yes, I’m perfectly fine. Just perfect.” She sighed. “You know, it feels as if I’ve found what I’ve been searching for my whole life. And it was sitting on my doorstep the whole time.”

“That’s how I feel about us. I’ve known Suzie for so long. If only I’d called in to say hello, or she’d invited me to dinner…” He kissed Elizabeth’s lips, a long, lingering kiss filled with longing. “But the best things are worth waiting for.”

“So where is this plateau of yours?” Elizabeth followed Dean, lost in her own thoughts. He was right, they had been connected by Suzie for so long, and yet had never met. Dean hadn’t even visited the garden until it was finished. It truly was as if fate had its own agenda.

“We just need to walk a little further.” Dean pointed into the distance. Elizabeth could see where the trail sloped down, and after that, a green expanse disappeared into the distance. That must be it.

A breeze sprang up as they walked, reminding them that the seasons were still in flux and that the weather could change in an instant. Yet Elizabeth didn’t feel threatened by the elements, not when she was with Dean. Here, like everywhere else, he made her feel safe. He made her feel wanted, he made her feel normal. He’d seen so much of life, dealt with kids who needed a guiding hand, learned skills so that he could talk to them on their own level, and he’d been the one who taught young people who were alone in the world how to cope with being different.

The path widened, she caught up with him and they walked side by side, the breeze dragging her hair back from her face. Normally she would want to drag it back, and hide behind the carefully cut style that always hid her cheeks. Not today. Not with Dean. She would never hide from him.

“I’ve never felt so free.” She blurted the words out before her brain could filter them.

Dean slipped an arm over her shoulder. “Me neither. Which is weird, since I’m more committed to you than anything in my life before. But it’s a relief, as if my search is over.”

“Oh, so you will be taking me for granted.” She grinned as she spoke.

“Never.” He breathed in the mountain air and let it go. “That’s the spot where I first shifted.”

“Really.” She followed his gaze. “Did you mom or your dad teach you?”

“My dad. My mom wasn’t a shifter.” He chuckled as he thought of a memory, and Elizabeth knew she could spend her whole life listening to him speak about his childhood and his life here. For as much as hers was bereft of love, she was certain Dean’s had been full of it.

“How did they meet?”

“My mom came here to Bear Creek on vacation. She stayed at the local hotel. With her boyfriend.”

“And your dad stole her from him?” Elizabeth asked.

“Not exactly. My dad made a fool of himself. Talk about head over heels in love. And my mom thought he was a jerk.”

“What happened, how did he redeem himself?” Elizabeth was intrigued.

“My mom came up here with her boyfriend, as I said. The guy told her he was experienced at trail walking. He might have gotten away with it if the mist didn’t roll in. They were lost. The alert was raised at the hotel that two guests were missing and mountain rescue was called.”

“And your dad found your mom?” Elizabeth asked. “That is kind of romantic.”

“Let’s go with that.” Dean chuckled again.

“What’s that supposed to mean?”

They had reached the point where the trail became less visible as it opened up onto the wide grassy plain. She could see why Dean had asked her if she minded heights. There was a sheer drop to their left, but the view was amazing. Bear Creek sat below them, a green jewel, with a silvery thread meandering toward it that could only be the creek.

“It means that my mom was a strongly opinionated woman. Explaining the whole bear shifter thing was not easy. She thought he was still being a jerk. And when he shifted to prove it, she was not impressed.” Dean set the pack down on the grass. “But she soon accepted him, and they have lived happily ever after ever since.”

“They still live in Bear Creek?” Elizabeth asked.

“They do. Although they go on long cruises when the winter comes.” He sat down on the ground and Elizabeth did the same.

“I can’t imagine having those kind of deep roots. I’ve always felt like tumbleweed.” She helped him unpack the picnic, which included a bottle of wine. “Shall I pour?”

“Yes.” He passed her a couple of cups. “I didn’t bring wine glasses, sorry.”

“I didn't expect wine, let alone glasses.” She poured the wine and passed a cup to Dean. “The last picnic I went on, Suzie was ten, and we had cheese pinwheel sandwiches, and drank lemonade she had made.” Elizabeth wrinkled her nose. “It was super sour.”

“I sometimes regret not having younger kids. I never did picnics and sleepovers.” Dean offered her a chicken salad sandwich.”

“Thank you.” Elizabeth held it in her hand while she figured out if she really wanted to ask her next question.

Dean looked at her sideways. “I know that thoughtful expression. Come on, out with it.”

“Are you…” Elizabeth blushed furiously. “When we…”

“Just say it, and we’ll make sense of the question afterward.” He bit into his sandwich.

“Do you expect us to have children?”

Dean stopped chewing for a moment, and looked at her, with an unfathomable expression. Slowly he started to chew the food in his mouth, swallowed, and then took a gulp of his wine. “You mean us. Have children. Our own children.”

“Yes, it was something Suzie said…” She shook her head, and then added, “I shouldn’t have said anything.”

“I’m happy you did,” Dean told her. He ate his sandwich in silence, and Elizabeth wondered if he was going to answer the question or simply let it go. But if he didn’t answer, it would stand between them, an impenetrable barrier.

Elizabeth sat looking out over the valley below. She ate but didn’t taste the chicken, or the bread, or the salad, in her sandwich. The silence stretched on until finally, Dean cleared his throat.

“I’ve always dreamed of having children, you know that already. When my mate didn't materialize, I filled my life with other people’s children, those in need, who had no home, no parent, for whatever reason.”

Dean slid across the ground to sit close to her. Reaching for her hand, he looked into her eyes. “If we are blessed with children, I would be the happiest man alive. But if we are not, for whatever reason, I would still be the happiest man alive, because you are in my life.”

“That doesn’t exactly answer the question.” Elizabeth didn’t know what she was more afraid of, Dean saying he did want children, or if he told her he didn’t. Somehow, seeing Dean with Storm, seeing the love he had for her, and how Louise, Zak, and her own Suzie looked on him as a dad, made her want to give him a child. A child of his own so that he could experience the joy and exquisite pain of being a parent.

“I would love to have a child with you, Elizabeth. But I don’t want to pressure you. I want it to be your choice too. And whatever you decide, or if for some reason we don’t conceive, it is not going to ruin the way I feel about you and the happiness you have brought into my life.”

Elizabeth stroked his cheek with her hand. “The happiest time of my life was when I was a mom. Maybe it would have been more perfect, if I had a man to share it with. Maybe it wouldn’t. I always told myself it would have been different if I was with someone when I raised Suzie. That our relationship is better, stronger because it was us two against the world. But I’m not so sure now. I think if I had a man like you by my side that I would like to do it all over again.”

“I will always be by your side, Elizabeth.” Dean lowered his head and sealed his words with a kiss.