Ike
It’s no secret that death is the ultimate teacher. When someone close to us passes away, we learn what it really means to live. We learn life is fragile and precious, but above everything else, we learn life is finite. Most of us that have been touched by the frailty of life find ourselves living fuller, more honest lives to better appreciate each day we have.
Yet when our time is up, even the best of us are often faced with words left unsaid, and things left undone. For some, the unfinished becomes their regrets as they realize they didn’t seize every opportunity. For others, like myself, our time ended prematurely, leaving us without the opportunity to live a full life without regrets.
Time wasn’t supposed to matter here, and yet it did. In the cruelest twist of fate, time mattered more to me now than it ever had when I was alive. Axel had reluctantly agreed to let me be the one to tell her, but I knew I didn’t have much time before he’d do it for me. In the end, I knew I couldn’t rob Charlotte of the chance to help Click, nor could I take away her chance to live out her life with George. Time was of the essence. I didn’t want to miss my chance and with so much unknown—would Charlotte stay or go—it felt as if it was now or never.
She was sitting on the steps of Grams’s back porch when I arrived, sipping a glass of iced tea and grimacing at Rudy while he pecked at the ground. The hulk of a rooster noticed me before Charlotte did and he made his way over, bobbing his head as if to say hello. I could swear it was deliberate, as if he were telling Charlotte, I don’t like you, but this guy, he’s cool. When Charlotte noticed me she pursed her mouth.
“What’s up, Rudy?” I grinned. He cocked his head, shooting me a look before he strutted away.
“Why does he like you and not me?” Charlotte whined.
I laughed. I had no idea why the bird seemed to like me, but it was humorous how much it bothered Charlotte. “Are you really this upset about it?”
“No,” she huffed, then mumbled something that sounded like stupid cock under her breath. I took her hands and pulled her to her feet. She was barefoot and wearing shredded jeans with a black tank top. Her hair was tied up in a messy knot on her head. It was far from the flowing white gowns people imagined angels wearing in heaven, but even without the satin and silk, she looked ethereal to me. Her beauty was effortless. She didn’t even have to try.
“Well if it’s any consolation, I like you,” I teased.
She smiled and smacked my shoulder playfully. “He’ll come around. Everyone ends up liking me.”
“Look who’s being cocky now,” I jested then squeezed one eye shut making my best Popeye face. “Guk, guk, guk.” I poked my elbow at her.
Her mouth lifted on one side as she fought laughing at me. “Is my brother’s lameness rubbing off on you?”
“Rudy doesn’t think I’m lame.” I jabbed my thumb over my shoulder in the rooster’s direction. “He thinks I’m the B.M.O.T.O.S.”
Charlotte’s features contorted in confusion. “Big man…”
“…on the other side,” I finished proudly.
She rolled her eyes. “Yeah, well, Rudy is a cock, and you know what they say.”
“What’s that?”
She shrugged a shoulder nonchalantly, “Birds of a feather, and all that.”
“Oh, and I’m the dork, huh?” I chuckled.
“Yeah,” she confirmed. “And everyone does end up liking me. I’m awesome that way.”
“Is that so? Hmm…” I tapped my finger against my cheek as if thinking. “What about Misty?”
The instant Charlotte’s smile fell I knew I’d screwed up.
She blinked a few times, seemingly muddling through the shock of who I’d just mentioned. “No, I guess she never did like me, huh.”
I mentally kicked myself for saying something that made her sad. “Who cares what she thinks,” I said as I searched my mind desperately for something to say to change the subject without making it awkward or noticeable.
“You don’t think…” she paused. “George wouldn’t hang out with her again, would he?” Before I could answer, she shook her head. “Never mind. Don’t answer that. I know he wouldn’t. That was a dumb thought. I’m just being…” She stopped again.
“Jealous?” I ventured.
Her cheeks flushed pink as she dropped her gaze to her knotted hands. “You know I was never fond of her.”
“No one was fond of her. What ever happened to her anyways?”
“She left town for a while, but she came back. Her and Roger worked things out.”
“Seriously?” I asked in disbelief. “He took her back?” Out of all the men in the world, Roger was the last one I’d ever peg as the forgiving type, let alone forgiving his girlfriend for cheating on him.
“Yeah, that’s what I heard. She never came back to the restaurant. We passed each other in town a few times, but as soon as she’d see me she’d haul ass in the opposite direction.” She rolled her eyes, and I knew she couldn’t help the jealousy she felt. “I don’t wish anything ill for her, ya know. In the years since it all went down, I realized maybe Misty had her own tale of woe…just like we all do. I don’t blame her for what George allowed himself to get involved in. We never would’ve been friends or anything, but at the end of my life I wasn’t her enemy. I just don’t like to think about George being with her…” She shook her head, annoyed by the vulnerability she was showing. She didn’t like feeling jealous.
I gently lifted her chin to meet my gaze, “Jealousy is normal. You think I haven’t felt it?” Her brows rose in surprise at my declaration. I nodded, “You have no idea.”
“I feel like the most selfish person in the world,” she said, taking my face in her hands as she peered into my eyes. I could see the pain and guilt she felt. She hated knowing she had a part of making me feel this way. “I don’t think I could stand the thought of either of you with another woman.”
I pulled away and looked down, unable to hold her stare, her sentiment hitting closer to home than I cared to admit.
“Hey,” she said, pulling me back. I met her gaze as she studied my face. “What’s wrong, Ike?”
You’re not really dead.
You may have to go back and leave me.
Everything.
I stared back at the love of my life; her gray eyes, her petite mouth. I knew she was never really mine, not exclusively. There was George, of course, but even bigger than the McDermott twins, there were all the souls that needed her help crossing over. A pang shot through me as everything Marlena had said snapped into sharp focus. It took everything in me not to actually stumble under the weight of it as my resolve threatened to falter.
I shoved the doubt, the fear, and the guilt back into the box I’d created in my head. I needed to do this first, to seize the last of this opportunity in front of me before I left everything to rest in the hands of fate and time.
I covered her hand with mine and pressed hers to my cheek. “Remember that first date we talked about?”
She chuckled, a soft nostalgic smile taking her lips. “I do. I wanted it so badly.”
“Well, here we are, baby girl. I’m ready if you are.”
Her eyes lit up. “Are you asking me out on a date, Ike McDermott?”
“Date by ambush, remember? Close your eyes.”
Her mouth lifted in a curious smile as she stiffened her spine, inhaled deeply, and closed her eyes. “Rudy better not be invited to this,” she muttered.
I stifled a laugh as Rudy perked his head up when he heard his name. “Sorry Rudster, you didn’t make the list.” With a wave of my hand, I changed our surroundings.