CHAPTER 17
RIA SMILED. IT was surprising to her that she could. Two days had passed since she and Phoenix had figured out that Chief Brody was involved in the murders. Although he wasn’t any closer to being brought to justice, she still could find a sliver of happiness because Phoenix was coming home every evening and they’d have dinner and conversation before he headed back to the office. Although they hadn’t spent a lot of time together, she found joy in the small things and it meant he was thinking of her.
She was learning more and more about him because while he was staking out the Chief, he’d been texting Ria. In fact, her voice to text had never been used so much. The more she got to know him, the more she knew her heart. How could she help herself but fall?
He’d allowed her to get to know his good side…and his faults. Even Phoenix Cade had flaws. When he became frustrated he was known to drop a few f-bombs. Although he wouldn’t sleep in the same bed as her, he preferred sleeping in the chair and waking up with neck pain. She knew because she heard him pop the cap to the ibuprofen bottle in the morning. He also had a protective side the length of a football field. He’d house-bound her. She couldn’t go anywhere, not even on the porch. And the deputies had become her good friends over the last three days as they revolved through the front door as Phoenix stayed on the case. He made slight compensations by bringing her a dessert from a pastry shop as an apology that her life was still upside down. She didn’t know about the business of catching a criminal, but she realized it didn’t happen overnight.
One morning after she’d stubbed her toe on a chair, Phoenix had thrown it out, saying it had springs sticking out, but she knew why he’d gone to the trouble. His effort had made her smile. That was the same day he’d picked up the book she’d been reading and she used her fingers as a guide as she led him over several sentences in Braille.
In one of his text messages, he’d told her that he wanted her to meet his family. Her heart had almost tumbled into her belly at the invitation. Sure, he didn’t say “right away” but he’d extended the invitation and that counted for a lot. That led her to believe that eventually, when the case was over, they would continue to see one another.
When she’d complained that her business was floundering, he’d listened to her, pointing out in Phoenix-fashion that if she was still at the studio, she could end up dead and then what business would she have? Although crude, she did see the argument.
Ria was excited to see where things would go between them.
The sound of the door opening and closing made her lift her chin in that direction. “Deputy Holloway? I just put on a pot of coffee. Can I get you a cup?”
The soft footsteps on the wood flooring told her it wasn’t Lauren. She stood up from the couch, her heart hammering. “Hello?”
“It’s me.”
“Phyllis? I wasn’t expecting you.” She started to take a step toward her friend, but the sound of Phyllis’s sniffling paused Ria. “What’s wrong, honey?”
“Troy told me the truth.”
“Oh, sweetie.”
“But then, you already knew what that truth is, didn’t you?”
“I’m sorry.”
“Are you?”
“Of course. Why would you think I wouldn’t be?”
“Maybe because you knew and didn’t tell me.” Her voice sounded raw as if she’d been crying for a while.
Ria took four steps which brought her closer to Phyllis. “I-I’m sorry. I am. I wanted to tell you, but—”
“You didn’t. I thought we were close. I never would have kept something this shitty from you.”
“Phyllis…” Ria reached out, but heard her friend sidestep the touch.
“Please, don’t. You can’t just “please Phyllis” your way out of this. He told me everything, even that you came to speak to him.”
“I went with Phoenix. I needed to hear him tell the truth so I could decide if I needed to tell you.” Immediately she sensed she’d said the wrong thing.
“Oh, you needed to decide?” Her voice dropped eerily low.
“He promised he would tell you.”
“You’re not getting it, Ria. You and I always said we’d watch each other’s backs. Till the end. Right? I guess I shouldn’t be surprised that you didn’t see how fitting it is to watch my back.”
“What do you mean?” Ria’s stomach turned. She realized this would only go downhill from here.
“I was there for you after the accident, whatever you needed from me I gave. I spent more time with you than I did with Troy. Do you realize that he mentioned this as one of the reasons why we drifted apart? That I cared more for my friends and clients than I do him.”
“I-I’m sorry, Phyllis. I didn’t realize…”
“No, you didn’t. Just as you also didn’t realize how you pushed Jamie to the back burner too.”
Ria’s throat constricted. Her chest ached. “I did?”
“You bet you did. He came to see me a year after the accident and said you didn’t want anything to do with him. You were wrapped up in feeling sorry for yourself.”
Wrapping her arms around her waist, she thought she’d throw up. “I did have a lot on my plate. I’m not making excuses, but if he had loved me he would have understood what I was going through. Maybe even chosen to speak to me instead of coming to you and complaining.”
“He didn’t know how to reach you. Hell, there were times I didn’t know how to reach you, but I didn’t give up. How could you do this? Stay silent. Pick sides.”
“At first I wasn’t allowed to say anything. Phoenix worried that it would compromise the case.”
“The case? So, now my relationship is a case? I even told you that I suspected Troy was cheating and you convinced me it couldn’t be possible.” Her snicker was abrasive. “You knew and could have said something.”
“I didn’t know then. I promise.”
“You’re promises don’t mean anything right now. Just like this so-called friendship doesn’t mean anything right now,” she huffed. “Just so you know, Troy moved out, but I’m sure you can’t see past your own drama to care.” And then the slamming of the door made Ria jump.
She stood there for a long time, trying to process what had just happened. When they were younger, she and Phyllis had their arguments, but none had been as vicious as now. Ria could understand why her friend was hurt. She’d wanted to explain, but what could she say that wouldn’t make things worse?
All her good feelings from earlier dwindled.
~~~**~~~
Phoenix stepped into the bedroom and found Ria sitting on the bed, a pile of crumbled tissues on the nightstand. After he’d received the call from Deputy Holloway telling him about the argument she’d overheard between Ria and Phyllis, he knew he needed to be there to help Ria.
Seeing her now, with her red-rimmed eyes and rosy cheeks, she was exactly as messed up as he thought she would be.
“What are you doing here, Phoenix? I thought you said you wouldn’t be home until late.”
He moved to the bed and sat down by her feet. “Deputy Holloway told me what happened. She thought you might need a friend.”
“You have an investigation going on. You don’t need to bother with a blubbering fool.”
“Sweetheart, you’re not a blubbering fool.”
“Take a look at my face. I can only imagine how puffy and red I am.”
“You look beautiful.”
“You’re lying. My eyes are swollen and burning. As well as my nose.”
Phoenix leaned in and he swiped a hand through her hair. “If you don’t get it by now that I think you’re beautiful no matter what, even when you’ve been crying over a fight with a friend, then you’ll never understand. What happened?”
“Troy told her everything and she hates me because she feels like I betrayed her. She can’t understand why I didn’t tell her.” She worked her bottom lip and it tugged at his heart. “I’m a terrible friend.”
“No, you’re not.”
“Yes—yes I am. She said so herself. I’m self-involved and can’t see beyond my own issues,” she sobbed.
He shifted and in one swift move, lifted and placed her on his lap. He scooted up to lean against the headboard. “Hush now, sweetheart,” he whispered in her ear.
“I-I can’t. She’s right. I should have told her.”
He plucked a tissue from the box and used it to wipe at her moist cheeks. “I wouldn’t let you. Remember?”
“But-But I had time after you spoke to him. I thought it would be best coming from him,” she sniffled.
“And you’re right about that. We knew he’d tell her. He was just a little slow about it.”
“She tossed him out.”
“And that’s why he held back. He knew she’d be angry. Men hate conflict.”
“I get that, trust me, I do. But I hadn’t called to check up on her.”
“Okay, maybe you dropped the ball on that, but you’ve been a little pre-occupied in staying alive. You didn’t choose to be here in this position, and if you weren’t, I’m sure you’d be there for your friend. She knows that, but she’s hurt. When people are hurt they lash out at those who are closest to them. When Katy left I was a real dick to my brothers and sister.”
“Did they forgive you,” she said through a sniffle.
He shrugged. “Aww, they say they do but on occasion they pull out their whiniest voices and pretend they’re me complaining. It’s quite emasculating.”
Finally, one corner of her mouth lifted. “You? Emasculated? I don’t believe it.”
“Oh, I do have a sensitive side.” He cupped her cheek and drew her in, planting his lips on hers. He kissed her long and hard, putting all his emotions and care into that one kiss. When he drew back, he looked down at her. The tears had dried as something else took shape on her face.
Her hands moved on his chest and the flush color of her cheeks poured into her neck and chest. Even with all the crying she’d done, she still was the best thing he’d ever laid eyes upon. She reminded him of an angel and he almost needed to pinch himself to believe that she was here…and finding a spot inside his heart.
“I thought you said you’d wear a vest to be safer,” she said.
“Oh, so that was what you were feeling for? I thought you were checking out my pectorals.” He chuckled.
“Is that your gun?” She wiggled her hips that only made his body tighter.
“If I carried my gun behind my zipper. Sorry, sweetheart. I’ve been carrying that around since we met.”
“Is that so? That’s nothing to be sorry for. In fact, thank you.”
“For what?”
“For everything. Again, you sweep in and take care of me. You always know how to make me feel better. Although I’m hurt over the disagreement with Phyllis, I’m glad you’re here with me.”
He couldn’t hold back. He lavished her mouth again, sipping her sweetness. He’d been wrapped up in the case lately, but he’d also had time to think and Ria was at the crux of every thought. He liked having her here when he came home, seeing her lovely smile. He wanted to share his bed with her. Not for temporary satisfaction, but each night. He wanted to share his closet, although he’d guess she’d want her own. He wished to stand next to her in the kitchen, preparing meals together. Wanted to be the man who made her coffee every morning and be the first person to wish her happy birthday. Hell, truth be known, he wanted to see her full with his baby—their baby. Never had he been so certain that he wanted children, knowing perfectly well she’d be a wonderful mother.
Phoenix had it bad and he never had it better.
The thin nightgown she wore had lifted on her shapely thighs and he could see the impressions of her nipples under the material. She was a dream that he needed to make reality.
He lifted her hand and kissed each knuckle, feeling her trembling fingers. “Sweetheart, it’s not too late to pull out. Say the word and I’ll back the hell away.”
She entwined her fingers in his hair. “If you did, I’d be very disappointed. I’ve been waiting—all my life it seems—for this.”
“You smell so good. Better than those candles Deputy Holloway burns in the office.”
She giggled. “And you know what I think of you and your scent. I love the smell of your soap, the fabric softener in your clothes, the leather of your utility belt. All of it makes your special cologne.”
“I admire your nose darlin’.” He kissed the tip of her nose.
“I’ve never been so anxious to explore every part of you.” Her cheeks turned rosy again.
“You pretty much did when you massaged me.”
“Almost, but not every part.” She dropped her fingers to his belt and slid one finger along his waist. Her eyes dazzled in the golden light of the table lamp. “Feeling it against my bottom makes me want to explore even more.”
A groan found its way up his throat and through his mouth. Hell, that part they were referring to was showing up in a big way. “I’ve wondered so many damn times what you look like underneath your clothes, more than what I saw when I massaged you. I imagine every inch of you is perfect.” He dropped his hand to her thigh and with his thumb he made figure eights on her warm skin.
“Trust me, I can’t see, but I know I’m not perfect.”
“To me, you are.” He kissed her cheek. “I want to spend time staring at your naked body, learning it, exploring what makes you squirm. I’m a tough man, sweetheart, been accused a time or two of not having a softer side so I’m a little afraid to touch you—afraid that I’ll rip your clothes off instead of controlling myself to give you all the pleasure you deserve.”
“That sounds interesting.”
He heard the breathiness in her tone. “Yeah, but I don’t want you to think I’m one of those men who’s only looking for his own satisfaction.”
“I’d never think that about you. You’ve proven that you do have a softer side, whether you want to admit it or not.”
He growled. “With you, I don’t mind.”
“Is it too bold of me to admit that I’ve fantasized of you and me here, in bed together, and being naked under your stare. I’ve touched myself to that very thought.”
“You’re killing me, woman.” He shifted his hips before his dick was permanently crooked.
“I haven’t had sex—real sex—since the accident. When Jamie and I tried, it seemed he was worried, anxious. We especially didn’t use our mouths to explore. He didn’t seem to like oral sex.”
Her words both made him bitter with jealousy and so excited he thought he’d burst. Reaching for the hem of her nightgown, he raised it over her waist, breasts, and head until she sat on his lap completely naked. Her perfect pink nipples were hard and thick and he wanted to feast on the plump pillows for hours. He dipped his head and suckled one tip into his mouth, sucking hard while with his hand tweaked her other nipple. A moan fell off her mouth as she arched into him, her fingers clinging to his shoulders as he played with her breasts.
He was on fire and as she slipped a hand between their bodies, he pulled back slightly, giving her the room she needed. She had some trouble with his belt, so he aided her in the effort and he quickly slid the bothersome gear aside, glad he’d removed his gun and placed it in the locked box in the closet before he came back to the bedroom. He let her continue to unbutton and unzip his jeans and she found the part of him that needed freedom from the confines of clothing. Ria rubbed her palm along his cock through the boxers and he sucked in a deep breath, mesmerized how she undid him so quickly.
“Just as I thought. Not only long but wide too.”
Although her words would sound juvenile, inexperienced to some, to him they were coming from a woman who relied on her senses other than eyesight. Things were measured. Felt. Even tasted. He jerked at the thought.
He needed to speed things along a little faster. With one swift move, he pushed her back to the bed and quickly rid his body of his shirt, jeans, boxers, and socks. Clothes were the last thing either of them needed. He stared down at her, how her long hair spread over the blue pillow. Her cheeks were the palest of pink which made her eyes stand out like gems. Although eyes were used for seeing, they still served a purpose for her. They were windows into her soul and he swore she dragged him in to some mystical world where only the two of them existed. Her tongue came out to brush across her bottom lip, moistening the plump flesh that matched the color of her nipples.
Sitting back on his haunches, he skimmed his gaze down her belly to her thighs. They were a perfect duo of muscle and softness. Her breasts were firm, not too small, not too big. Most importantly, they were real and he could fit them perfectly in his palms. A man didn’t need anything more than what fit into his hands. In a world where women were self-conscious about their bodies, how svelte or how flat or how tight, he liked that she seemed careless about those things. Her stomach was rounded and she wasn’t rail thin like Katy had been, thank goodness. Although she was modelesque, she also starved herself at times to remain skinny. Ria didn’t complain about her soft spots, but rather laid before him, allowing him to explore her.
Starting at her neck, he slowly made a line between her breasts and down her trembling stomach. He stopped at her belly button and twirled his finger around the delicate cave and she arched her back slightly. She dug her teeth into her bottom lip now as if she anticipated what he’d touch next. He loved her wild expression.
“You’re amazingly beautiful, Ria.”
Without a word, she pushed his chest and, because he outweighed her by at least a hundred pounds, he didn’t fall back, but he understood what she wanted. He laid back onto the bed and she came up to straddle him. “Since I have the disadvantage of not being able to see you, I should have the first go at exploring.”
He wouldn’t argue.
She sat back onto his legs and he could feel the sinewy moisture from her thighs seeping through the hairs on his legs. Imagining that the crisp hairs tickled her most precious part drove him mad. His breath came out in a hiss when her hand was on his balls, then the fingers of the other hand wrapped round his erection. She wasted no time.
The fingers on his balls gently squeezed and the fingers around his girth began to take on a rhythm. She treated him as she probably would anything she’d never experienced before. Her eyes were dazzling. Her lips puckered and she looked completely, and utterly, entranced. She used one finger to study the solid line of him, sliding the nail tip over his head, smearing the pre-cum over his skin. “I like how you feel.”
“I like how you feel feeling me.” He took in a deep breath, wanting her so badly it hurt, and yet knowing that he’d have her before the night was over pleased him. There was something pleasurable in watching how she took such great pains of exploring him. He wondered if any woman before her had taken this much time in discovering him?
She adjusted her seat on his legs and bent, swiping her tongue along his tip. He jerked and sucked in a breath, clutching her shoulders lightly. Each suckle of her mouth brought him closer to the edge of release. Although the mere thought of exploding in her mouth would be the pleasure of all pleasures, he needed more than a selfish end to his own desire.
“Lay back.” His voice was raw even to his own ears.
Without hesitation, she followed his request and laid back onto the bed. Her skin was so pale and, no doubt, most of her body had never seen the sun. He skimmed his fingers along her flawless flesh and her nipples erected fully again. With one hand, he took both her wrists between his fingers and lifted her arms above her head. She arched her back and he was mesmerized by how lush her body looked. He wished he was talented with a paintbrush because she deserved to be painted in all her glory.
She resisted against his hold and he still held her wrists. “I want to touch you too.”
He leaned forward, her nipples brushed his chest as he whispered, “Sweetheart, I’m so close. I don’t think I can handle your hands on me at this second.”
“I’d forgive you.” A teasing smile crawled across her pretty face.
“I wouldn’t forgive myself though. In good time.” He eased down her body, first licking her nipples, the deep valley between her breasts, downward to her stomach. Dipping his tongue into the well of her belly button, she jerked her hips and he pressed her thighs, holding her still. He continued the path of erotic pleasure until he reached the part of her that made him salivate. Slipping his hand between her thighs, he gently pressed her legs and she opened for him. Her sweet, musky scent teased his nostrils and he moaned. He couldn’t wait to plunder her with his tongue.
Her pink folds glistened with arousal and he licked his lips in anticipation. Sliding his hands around to cup her ass, he brought her up to his face, inhaling her scent deeper into his lungs. Of all the scents he’d ever smelled, she had a distinct one that he’d never forget.
With his tongue, he spread the quivering folds, and she cried out in delight. “Phoenix…” His name floated from her lips. Although he wanted to see her expression, he didn’t take his gaze from his target.
“Yes?”
“I-I want you.”
“I want you too, baby, and that means I need to know all of you, taste all of you.”
Her fingers dug into his hair as if she prepared to be taken on the ride of her life. He’d give her exactly what she wanted. He rolled his tongue over her clit, sliding along the slippery bead of nerves. Her hips came up again, gyrating against his lips.