CHAPTER 16:
BEN
Juniper was quick to orgasm again under my touch and tongue. The second time I made her come was just as much of a wonderful rush for me as it had been the first time. Her fair skin erupted with goosebumps, she cried out my name, and she fisted my hair. The tight walls inside her contracted sharply around my two fingers as she bucked hard against my hand and my mouth. She started panting my name, her thighs squeezing me. I didn't stop. I kept pumping my fingers and swirling my tongue over her clit, because that seemed to be the magic recipe.
It took every ounce of my control to not come as she came. God, how easy it would be to let go. All I could think about was how amazing it would feel to be buried inside her in this moment. The feeling of her tight walls contracting like that around my cock. My balls ached at the very thought. As she finished, I pulled away from her and collapsed onto the bed beside her.
Fuck. Fuck. Fuck.
My heart exploded. This girl fucking owned me. I was completely at her mercy in every way. I both hated and loved the control she had over me.
I'd tried to leave a couple minutes ago too. Really, I had. I'd admitted that I wished I could have my virginity back. Something I wouldn't have dared admit to anyone else in this world. Although, it wasn't so much my innocence I wanted back. More so the consequences of having sex with Sonya, my recklessness, and the decision I made when she had her abortion. Because the abortion hadn't been Sonya's choice. She'd let me choose, and caring too much what everyone else would think, I'd told her to get the abortion. I'd killed our child. I hated myself for that and I always would. So, yes, I'd gladly take my virginity back if I could take that decision back with it.
And it was fucked up now that I looked at Juniper and her pregnancy as my second chance. I still couldn't help but wonder if it was really her I liked or the fact that she was pregnant.
See, fucked up.
So, I'd tried to leave because Juniper did not need that level of confusion in her life. It wasn't fair to her. But she'd been so damn sexy when she'd stood up to me and demanded I get back in her bed. For a split second, I'd forgotten everything else and gave into her. I'd undressed at record speed. She was too tempting to deny.
Still temping me now, she moved from where she lay beside me, her soft body brushing against mine. Her hand gently trailed over my stomach and moved downward. Her fingers caressed my cock, shooting shivers all through my body.
“It's my turn to taste you now,” she said. Blush adorably spread over her cheeks at her own naughty words. Her teeth sunk into her bottom lip and she stared down at my cock, sizing it up. Yes, sweetheart, put it in your mouth.
I ached. I yearned. I itched for her mouth. I was in no position to resist her, despite the voice in the back of my head that screamed stop her! I was simply powerless. Until I heard the fucking glorious sound of the front door opening and slamming, followed by Rhett's loud-ass voice as he yelled, “Yo, June, I'm home. I brought you some takeout from the restaurant. Putting it in the oven.”
Rhett's annoying voice was enough to break the spell I was under. I caught her shoulders before her mouth could touch me. “Stop,” I whispered. “You have to stop.” A growl tore from my lips as I said it because stopping her was physically painful. Thank God for the interruption, though, because I hadn't wanted this. I couldn't cross another line with her, not being this uncertain about everything.
I could see the annoyance on her face.
“Another time,” I reassured her.
We both left the bed and silently dressed. I kept my eyes off her. I didn’t need the temptation of seeing her naked all over again. My erection wasn't going anywhere, but I managed to get my pants on. She put on her usual sweatshirt and jeans. Was she not wearing the new stuff Rhett had gotten Sydney to get for her?
“You okay?” she asked me.
“Yes,” I said sharply, but I wasn’t okay. Miles from okay. “By the way, I called my lawyer earlier and he told me you’re safe to go see the doctor. Everything’s confidential.”
“Really? That’s great news.” She smiled.
I remained stoic. “Don’t check your email. Don’t check your Facebook. Basically, don’t access anything where you have to login. Have you done any of that already?”
She shook her head. “No.”
“Good girl.”
“Ben—why does it feel like you’re trying to tell me goodbye again? Is it because Rhett’s home now? I will go out there and tell him to leave. Seriously, I will. I don’t care if this is his house.”
I cracked a brief smile. I’d have loved to have seen her do that. Then the smile fell away from my lips. “That’s not it. I need to get going. I need to think.”
“Oh.” Her face paled. “About us?”
I couldn’t lie to her. I just couldn’t. So, I answered honestly. “Yeah.”
Her body visibly stiffened. Her arms crossed protectively over her chest. “I see.”
An icy shiver ran over me. I did not want to hurt her. I sighed, running a hand through my hair, unsure of what I should say or do. “Will you call me once you make a doctor’s appointment? Let me know when and where? I want to drive you. I want to go with you.”
“Sure,” she responded but it was hardly convincing.
“Promise me, Juniper.”
“I said sure already,” she snapped, not meeting my eyes.
Oh, fuck. I’d really pissed her off. I hadn’t meant to. My heart squeezed and cracked. Apparently seeing her in any sort of pain did awful, terrible things to my insides. It felt like millions of tiny knives were jabbing at me. “Juniper,” I whispered, begging. I couldn’t have her mad at me. “It’s not like that. It’s just—”
“Just go,” she said, cutting me off. “Just go ahead and go if you need to.”
Ouch. I didn't want to dig myself into a deeper hole than the one I was already standing in, so I simply said, “Okay,” and slipped on my shoes. I left her room and softly closed the door behind me.
Blindly, I walked down the hall, through the living room, and out toward the kitchen. Was it better, at the risk of hurting us both, to just take myself out of the equation? It felt as if piranhas were snacking on my stomach, so I'd have to say the answer to that question was no. Still, I didn't know what the right move was.
“Oh, hey, Ben. I didn't know you were here.”
It was Rhett. I was so caught up in my own head, I hadn't noticed him standing—shirtless—in the kitchen. At the sink, he appeared to be attempting to get a giant red stain out of his Chancy Claw t-shirt.
“Damn, cocktail sauce again,” he said as he scrubbed. “Sometimes I think women purposely spill stuff on me, trying to get me to take off my shirt.” He chuckled, just as full of himself as always.
“You brought Juniper food,” I commented. “Thanks.”
“Yeah, your girl is craving meat like a caveman.” He abandoned his shirt in the sink and cracked open the oven, showing me the proof. “We should enter her into a buffalo wing eating contest. That's two dozen there. That's like a snack for her.”
I couldn't help but smile. And part of me kind of liked how Rhett kept referring to her as my girl. “I didn't know she was craving stuff.”
“More like she's adverse to stuff. Meat is one of the few things she's tolerating. You'd know more about this if you were around more.”
I glared at him.
“Just saying. You could forgive her for the Lilly Davenport thing and move on. That girl is under your skin and you know it. Stop being a pussy and just go with it.” His eyes drifted up to my forehead. “And what the fuck happened to your head? You get in fight? Quinton didn't show up, did he?”
Before I had a chance to respond, Juniper answered. “No, I did that.”
I froze. I hadn’t heard her come into the kitchen, but I now knew she stood behind me. Her presence made my heart start to beat a little too fast.
“No, shit,” Rhett said to her.
“Ben startled me,” she explained. “I swung before looking. He says he's fine.”
“I'm fine,” I confirmed.
“You look fine,” Rhett mumbled sarcastically. He opened the freezer, grabbed a frozen bag of veggies and tossed it in my direction.
I caught the bag. “Thanks,” I said, and pressed the bag to the spot above my eye.
It still felt tender.
So did my chest. Especially as Juniper moved around me as if I weren’t there, getting her lunch out of the oven. She sat down to eat at one of the bar stools, paying no attention to my presence.
Rhett went back to cleaning, or attempting to clean, his shirt. “Its days like this I really miss Noah living with me,” he mumbled as he scrubbed. It was a reference to Noah's OCD. Everyone knew the guy was a neat freak.
That girl is under your skin and you know it.
I thought over Rhett’s words. He’d spoke them carelessly, but he had a point. Juniper was under my skin. So much so that my feet were fucking frozen to the floor. Now would probably be a good time to leave, I’d already told her I needed to go, but I couldn’t seem to leave Rhett’s house. And then, much to my own surprise, I moved and sat down at the barstool beside Juniper.
We both said nothing. Complete silence. She ate her lunch. I held the frozen veggies to my head. While Rhett started going on and on about cocktail sauce and how disgusting it was. Eventually Ellie showed up. Then later Noah and Georgina. Then Sydney. Everyone was over because they all had plans to hangout tonight. And suddenly both Juniper and I were part of those plans.
The rest of the evening was loud—full of laughter, alcohol, and card games. Juniper fit in flawlessly, conversing with the others as if they were old friends. I did my best to appear at least semi-social. Group situations weren't really my thing these days. But since Juniper was there, I was there. We weren’t really speaking, at least not to one another. But we’d stayed in close proximity to one other all evening. I took that as a good sign. I took that to mean that I hadn’t ruined everything with her.
“Ben, bud, you know it’s almost seven fifty, right?” Ellie reminded me as it was getting closer to my curfew time.
Jesus, that damn curfew.
I was counting down the days until I was a free man again.
“Yep.” I stood, beyond disappointed that I had to leave Juniper behind now. “Goodnight, everyone,” I said to the group as I moved toward the door. “Goodnight, Juniper,” I said just to her from across the room.
“Goodnight, Ben.”
She didn’t leave the couch or walk me to door. I wasn’t sure what to make of it and my heart ached the entire drive home because of it. I knew I wouldn’t be getting much sleep tonight.
Shit. I was such an asshole. I’d done this to myself.
* * *
Three days slipped by. Three days where I didn’t hear a word from Juniper. I knew she was okay because I’d been keeping in touch with Rhett, but not being able to see her was pure agony. Finally, at nine in the morning on day four, she sent me a text.
Juniper: My doctor’s appointment is today at 10:15 if you’re still interested in going. Rhett already said he can drive me. So, either way.
Fuck Rhett taking her.
And she’d purposely waited until the last minute on this.
Me: I’ll be there at 9:45 to pick you up.
Juniper: I probably need to leave at 9:30 since I have to fill out forms.
Me: 9:30 then. See you soon.
Good thing I’d already taken the day off.
Rhett had given me a head’s up on this. I already knew today was the day of her doctor's appointment. I found it very decent of Rhett to let me know and all. It was in a long line of super decent things he'd been doing for me recently. I really owed him.
I finished getting ready for the day and headed over to pick up Juniper. I was antsy and jittery, as if this were a first date rather than a doctor's appointment.
Once outside the house, I waited in my car for her. I debated about going to the door, but thought it best to wait. Finally, she came outside and my heart jumped at the sight of her. She had her purse slung over her shoulder, and she wore her beautiful hair down around her shoulders. Instead of her usual sweatshirt, today she had on a black tank top. Her belly had really started to grow and the tank top seemed to accentuate it. She hopped in my car, huffing as if she were annoyed as she slammed the door and put on her seatbelt.
For the hell of it, because I had nothing to lose, I simply said, “Truce,” as the first word out of my mouth.
I didn't expect her to respond to the word, especially if she was annoyed with me, but immediately she unbuckled her seatbelt, leaned across the middle console and pressed a quick, firm kiss to my lips. I couldn’t help but grin in amazement. Then she sat back down, and rebuckled her seatbelt as if nothing had just happened.
“Truce,” I repeated again, just to see if she'd do it again.
She groaned and unbuckled for a second time. And once more she leaned over to give me a kiss. This time, better prepared for it, I caught her face in my hands as her lips pressed against mine. Gently refusing to let her go, I held her close. She resisted me for a small moment, offering no more than her swift kiss, but as I held her she quickly gave in and deepened the kiss with me. Urgency, electricity, and a need I was becoming accustomed to fueled my desire.
As we broke apart I whispered, “I missed you.” Because I really had. Emotion was rubbing me a little raw and I think she felt it too.
“I missed you too,” she muttered back. She sat back in her seat.
“Truce,” I said one more time. Because, really, I could fucking kiss her all day long.
“Stop it, you're abusing the Truce,” she scolded, but she gave me one more quick kiss.
I laughed as she settled back in her seat. She waited with questioning eyes, her hand hovering over her seatbelt, probably in case I was about to say truce again.
“You can buckle,” I told her. But now that I knew its effectiveness, I planned on abusing the hell out of the Truce today.
Her doctor's office was about fifteen minutes away. She remained silent the whole drive. Even as she filled out the paperwork in the waiting area, she didn't say much. Then it was her turn to go back with the nurse.
“Want me to wait out here or go back with you?” I had no idea what she was in store for, and from the pale look on her face I could tell she probably didn't, either.
“Come with, please?” Her voice cracked a little as she asked.
“Sure. That's what I'm here for.”
I followed Juniper and the nurse back to a room where more waiting followed.
The entire appointment ended up taking almost two hours. After a light scolding from the doctor, because Juniper had waited so long to make this first appointment, everything began. First, she had to answer about a billion questions. They wanted to know everything from her last period to her entire medical history. Then they gave her a pelvic exam, which was entirely too awkward for me. After that, they drew eight vials of blood. Eight! I counted. And then finally, the exciting part, they did an ultrasound.
“This will help us determine how far along you actually are,” the ultrasound technician said. She rolled Juniper's shirt up, squirted some gel on her belly, and then the lady pressed her little wand on top of the gel. Immediately a swishing sound filled the room and the ultrasound picture popped up on the screen.
“If you’re far along enough to tell, do you want to know the sex of the—” The nurse paused midsentence as something had caught her attention on the monitor.
Oh shit.
I could see what had distracted the nurse.
“Congratulations,” the nurse said, smiling. “You’re having twins.”