CHAPTER 38

Audrey read Enzo's message again.

"I just found out, too. Let's talk."

But what was there to talk about? It's not as if it was his (or her) fault. They let their guards down, who cares? They did go on a date together. The most infuriating thing was that the teachers kept it hidden from them.

And Darcy. Was she telling the truth? Did they think she knew? Were they just scared to tell her?

Maybe she was overreacting.

None of that mattered. The truth was the pictures hurt her. The students mocked her and made her feel worthless. For a second she felt like a highschooler again. Powerless.

She chuckled. It's been a while since I've felt like this. Funny how that kind of emotion comes to the surface exactly as painful as she remembered.

Her gut tightened. There was a knock on the door.

"Audrey?" Enzo called from outside.

Of course it was him. Who else?

She opened the door and let him in. He stared at her in silence, there was not much to say. This was so confusing. What a mess.

"Everything's a mess, right?" he said.

She looked at him. He wasn't reading her mind. She trusted him on that. This was Enzo feeling the same way she felt.

"Thank you for coming."

He shrugged, "you weren't answering my calls."

She sat on the sofa, he sat on the ottoman right across it.

Silence dominated the room. She didn't want to say anything. He saw the memes, they were humiliating.

"Are you okay?"

She chuckled, then shrugged.

"Kids are idiots—"

"I know they are. Doesn't mean I can't feel bad."

He nodded.

"So?"

She sighed.

"So nothing. I won't do anything."

He tensed up. She could feel his anger, but his eyes were soft. He wasn't angry at her.

"Nothing at all?" He asked.

She shook her head.

"I'll just talk to the teachers, let them know what we should expect from each other. Then just talk to the kids who posted the pictures online, like, 'I know what you did.' They're kids, they're probably going to freak out, stop doing it, delete whatever they have in their computer, try to avoid the conversation. I don't have to do anything."

"Don't you wanna get them in detention or—"

"Nah. The less attention we pay them, the better. I don't want this to explode or go viral."

Enzo smiled, he finally understood.

"Smart," he said.

"I do my best."

Another awkward silence. Enzo was acting weird.

"What about you? Are you okay?"

Enzo looked at her, and took a second or two to reply.

"I talked to Oscar and Cameron. I fucked up."

"What happened?"

He told her about the interview, and Oscar being just an ass. At first he wanted to fight Cameron but he convinced him not to.

"I'll have to work hard on them so they don't escalate this, they're about to graduate."

"That's kind of you."

His eyes shone with intensity, "It's not. It's my job."

The drapes danced in the midafternoon breeze. The warmth of it reached them and made Audrey remember the old days. She had it rough, but came out... not unscathed, but at least she was alive and well.

"Audrey," he said and she shivered. She was waiting for this. She looked up at him and knew what was coming.

"It's my fault. All of this."

She didn't say anything. She'd let him say his piece, then he'd leave, just like he wanted. She wouldn't chase him, ask him to stay. It wasn't worth it.

Except this time it is.

"I started doing this to help people come out of the life they're in. And I'll fail if we keep this going."

"Are you serious?"

"It's the truth."

"If you don't want to be with me just say it, don't pretend you're doing it for the better of mankind."

"You know how I feel about you."

"And how do you feel? You haven't told me. Go on now, you'll find someone you deserve soon enough."

"That's not fair."

"What is fair, anyway? What do you know about fairness?"

She was holding back tears. She would not let him see her cry. She shed tears for less deserving people in the past, this time she would be strong. Stronger than she'd ever been. She wouldn't do it again.

Her throat was sore. She couldn't talk.

"These kids have nothing," Enzo said, "I know what being poor feels like. Just like you. But you had a family, you had support. For these kids it's either graduating or a life of anger and frustration. Maybe even crime."

"And you'll help them all?"

"I have to try."

"Get the fuck out."

"Audrey—"

"Get out," she said, wiping a tear on her eye before he saw it rolling down, "I'm sorry but I can't bear to look at you right now."

He tried to make it right. He tried to say there might be a way but she didn't care. He tried to hold her but she couldn't let him do it. It would break her down. So she did what she had to, she invited him to leave.

It would be hard enough to see him at school. She better started working on herself right now. She better started mending her heart. Broken once again, and for the last time.