VEE

The silence between the four guys unnerves me. One of them always has something to say, but this isn’t the time for a joke or sarcastic comment. The only sound is distant traffic, the natural world around silent. Once again, my out of the ordinary day morphs into something worse than I could ever predict.

Movies filled with gore and violent deaths never appealed to me. I’ve avoided them, scared enough by the darkness in my dreams.

Now I live in a horror movie.

Heath breaks rank and edges toward the corpse. There’s no need to check if he or she's alive because nobody who’s contorted into that shape, surrounded by that much blood, could be. He crouches down and examines the body without touching, his face pale.

"Eyes burnt out," he says in a flat voice, then gestures. "The body has all the hallmarks a demon did this. There’s nothing I can do."

"Fuck." I'm unsure which guy speaks the word we're all thinking. I can't look away from the carnage in front of me, cursed by the human “car crash mentality” where curiosity overcomes horror.

A warm hand takes hold of mine, and I don't need to look around to know this is Joss’s. He gives my fingers a gentle squeeze but doesn't speak.

"How?" asks Ewan. "How the fuck did someone break the wards around the property and get in here?"

"Someone with powerful magic who can mask themselves," mutters Xander. "And the bigger question here is who’s able to?"

I'm on the edge again. Is the perpetrator known to the guys or not? Their reaction to whoever or whatever did this ices my veins. Joss can attempt to comfort me with his touch, but this time things are different.

I can detect his shock and uncertainty.

I drag my hand from Joss's, unable to cope with the idea the guys might have an adversary they fear. Xander's face is the darkest I've seen as he stands with both hands dug into the front of his hair.

Nobody has an answer.

I need an explanation, but I doubt any will come my way until they deal with their shock. I back up and sit on the rough stone doorstep; if I pretend that mangled “thing” on the floor doesn't exist the churning in my stomach might stop.

"You okay, Vee?" asks Ewan and crouches in front of me. "You've turned white."

I clamp a hand over my mouth to stifle the word “no.” Xander shifts focus to me his eyes glittering with an anger that freezes my blood further.

"This is your fault."

His words stun me, and I look between Ewan and Joss, scared their faces will reflect the same.

"How is it Vee’s fault?" snaps Ewan. "Don't be a dick."

Xander steps forward, and I scramble to stand and face his dark expression. "If you hadn’t distracted us with your stupid discussion, we would’ve noticed someone breaking through our defences and leaving... this."

"Whoa, Xander. I know you're upset, but this won't help." Joss places a hand on his shoulder. "Seriously, rein it in and don't lash out at Vee. Turn your anger into tracking down who did this."

"What the fuck are you doing, Xander?" calls Heath. "You guys, get over here and help me."

With one last scowl, Xander turns on his heel and joins his brother. Ewan follows.

"He is such an arsehole," I say through gritted teeth, and Joss laughs softly beside me. "I mean it, the guy pisses me off. How can we live together if Xander treats me like this?"

"It's not limited to you, Vee. Xander struggles with the mood swings his power causes him, but rarely admits it. Put him under pressure and he can't deal. You know how it is with brain stuff." I shake my head, confused. Joss taps the side of his head. "Xander’s rational side switches off. He stops thinking and just “does.” That can help when we’re under attack, but other times... not helpful, especially when it comes to you. He needs to be more rational about the situation."

I rub my mouth and watch as Xander bends to look at the body, then backs off and walks away, face to the sky.

"This is an extreme situation. Xander's response is extreme too. Don't hold it against him," says Joss

I clench my jaw. "I don't think I want to be around Xander when he's like this."

"Agreed. Head inside the house. I'll try to explain what's happening." I remain still and tensed, anger building against Xander blaming me for something I had no influence over. Joss rubs my arm. "Xander's reaction to you fucks with his head too."

"Pardon?"

"How can he protect and care for you when half the time he's lashing out at and upsetting you? He hasn't voiced this is happening to him but..." Joss raises his brows. "I know he isn’t coping."

I run my tongue along my teeth, quelling my anger at Xander. When I'm close to him, do I pick up on Xander the way Joss can? Does my Famine absorb Xander’s raw emotion? Or is my response to Xander caused by the War I contain? If Xander's always on a hair trigger, and I contain some of his power too, how will we ever resolve the effect it causes between us?

"I'll bear that in mind."

Relieved Joss offers to take me away from the scene to explain, I follow him back into the sanctuary of the house. Although judging by the guys’ reactions, I don't feel the place is much of a sanctuary now.

In the kitchen, Joss flicks the switch on the kettle. "How about a cup of tea? The English panacea for all ills."

I sit in a chair and fold my hands on the table in front of me. "That's an odd phrase, Joss."

"I’m very cultured you know.” He chuckles. “Haven’t you noticed I read? We joke that Ewan's the geek, but I'm the one whose job is to study the books that could help us."

"Old books? Like the one you were going to show me?" I ask.

"Ah." He drops two teabags into mugs and looks to the window. "Maybe I'll save that for another day. Sometimes a joke isn't appropriate to the situation."

Joke? "Hmm. Okay."

Heath walks into the kitchen and over to the sink. He pushes up his jacket sleeves and turns on the tap with an elbow. I look away as the water runs red beneath his hands.

"You said you'd explain what's happening," I say to Joss. "Who do you think did... that?"

“There's no definite answer to that,” says Heath. “There are few demons powerful enough to break in and send us a message like that. This is a show of power by someone high up.”

“Why ‘guess who?’ Does that mean you need to guess who the body is or guess who did it?” The look they exchange suggests they hadn’t considered which.

“We don’t know who the body is yet.”

“Are the words a clue?”

“A taunt,” mutters Joss.

“No, a challenge,” says Heath. “‘Look at what we can do, try and stop us.’ That shit.”

I spread my fingers out on the table and look down. Their confusion scares me more than the situation. They don’t know what to do.

"Then how the hell are you supposed to win against these demons?"

The kettle clicks and Joss pours water into three cups. "There's no way to 'win' this. We're guardians and can prevent an apocalypse situation, but the threat never leaves. It's non-stop, Vee."

"Your whole life will be this? Every day?" My life.

Neither guy responds. Heath sits and shuffles his chair closer to mine. He wraps an arm around me, and I rest my head against him. The conversation we had about struggling with his role makes sense. At the start of my time with them, the guys’ confidence in their abilities and situation comforted me. Now? I think the guys fooled me they’re the ones in control. Or are they also fooling themselves?

Joss hands me a steaming mug of tea, before sitting and placing his hand on my leg. I stare into the mug, mouth dry. I think this situation will take more than a cup of tea to fix.