VEE

The sombre mood permeates the house today, the events from yesterday denying any chance of banter. I chose to spend the night with Heath; the right move because I couldn’t walk into today as tense as yesterday evening. Following an early walk to soak up the quiet calm from the world surrounding the house, I head back into a strange morning.

Xander and Ewan sit at the table, lost to their surroundings as they sift through information.

“How are you feeling this morning?” I ask Ewan.

He kindly lifts his T-shirt to answer me. My question sounded odd considering he died yesterday, but the morning view of his tattooed body provides a welcome distraction.

"Have you found anything?" I ask.

Xander shakes his head and chews a pen. Scrawled words cover a notepad open in front of him.

"What are you looking for? Can I help?" I ask.

Xander turns his eyes back to the laptop screen. "I think Joss wanted to chat to you."

"Joss? Why?"

"He wants to take you shopping," replies Ewan, also not looking at me.

I jerk my head back. The Horsemen discovered an enemy they never knew existed and have no idea what it is or where it came from, and Joss wants to go shopping?

"Might take your mind off things," says Xander.

"Because I'm a girl and I must like shopping?" I ask with a short laugh.

Xander rests back in his chair and rubs a hand across his mouth, regarding me. "Heath said you're struggling with letting go of your human side. I personally think you should keep hold of that part of you."

"Why?"

"Because the Vee you were is part of who you are. I think it would help you to hold onto your humanity."

Does he mean he believes there's something darker in me that may take control? That if I become only Truth and not Vee that I become something sinister?

"Well, I think it would help if we found out what attacked Ewan."

"That's not likely today. There's no record of anything like the things that attacked us. My guess is we follow a trail until we find something concrete. Heath's talking to the shifter clans and vampire houses in the area to ask if they've seen anything."

Oh how easily I forget about the other creepy residents in the world. "And ask Portia?"

Ewan runs his tongue along his teeth and side glances Xander. "Heath's attempting to talk to her too, but I doubt she'll help us."

"She’ll probably blame us," mutters Xander.

I cross my arms. "Have you always had a shaky relationship with the fae?"

"We have a shaky relationship with everyone." Ewan pauses. "Some shakier than others."

"Your world is mind-boggling," I reply.

"Your world too, Vee," replies Xander.

True. Escaping the world for more than a short walk tempts me in Joss’s direction.

* * *

VEE

"Life is one huge barrel of fun right now, isn’t it?" says Joss as he opens the cafe door.

"What are we doing here?" I ask. "I thought we were going home now we've finished at the shops."

We spent an hour at the local department store, where Joss pretended to show interest while I picked out a coffee machine. Yes, the world is about to be overrun by zombies and we shop for kitchen goods.

On the drive home, he changed direction and we ended up in Grangeton. I spent many afternoons in this cafe with Anna, and the occasional date too. Trips to cafes don't factor in my life now. Although apparently they do.

The 1980s interior dated over the years; the wood panelling faded and peels from the walls in places. I swear the poster advertising milk as the “drink of champions” has been on the wall above the serving counter since I was a teen.

Or since I thought I was a teen.

Joss guides me into the café, and I slide into a booth to sit at the scratched table I always chose with Anna.

"How about some more normal in your freaky world; we can chill out for a while. Do you like cake? I like cake!"

I blink at his laid-back enthusiasm for ordinary life. Coffee machines and cake won't solve broken alliances and supernatural threats, but I understand what he's trying to do here.

"That's very sweet of you, Joss, but don't you think we should be getting back to the others? I imagine Xander's chomping at the bit to follow up a new lead by now."

“Ha ha.” Joss flicks my nose and I scowl. "Chomping at the bit? Like a horse?"

I smile. "Accidental metaphor, sorry."

“Still, that was funny.” He waves a menu at me. “What cake would you like?"

"Surprise me."

"Awesome!" He turns away and heads to the counter.

I stare around the cafe hoping for a slice of normality with my cake, but knowing my luck, a non-human creature exists in the room watching. Hairs lift on my neck thinking about it. The teenage girls hunched over milkshakes and their phones whispering? The two mothers with toddlers climbing across the tables and ignoring demands they behave? My paranoia’s reached new bounds.

Joss returns with a metal sign with the number 6 painted in black and slides into the booth next to me. He rests an arm along the seat back and purses his lips.

“I'm not going to ask you about yesterday as I want you to switch off from that, but I can sense you won't let go of what Logan said at Portia’s the other night."

I take a sugar sachet from the nearby bowl and pick at it. "I'm okay."

"I hope you haven't paid any attention to the fae moron. None of us believe you're anything but part of us."

"I haven't." I shuffle closer. "I'm good."

Joss wraps his arm around me. "Liar, but I'll forgive you."

The young waitress, with auburn hair pinned up high, serves coffees and two huge chocolate cake slices smothered in brown icing. She unsubtly checks Joss out as he removes his jacket, revealing the toned arms and T-shirt stretching across his broad chest. Who wouldn’t take a minute to enjoy the man with the tanned, muscular frame and striking green eyes filled with friendliness?

My mouth waters as I look at my cake, and I eagerly pick up the spoon. "I'm starving!"

"Don't blame me, I didn't do it," says Joss.

I groan and nudge him with my elbow, his humour blowing away more of the day’s seriousness. "I appreciate this. I didn't realise how I missed the ordinary."

"Yeah, I can tell you’re calmer already." He places hand on my leg as he continues eating.

"Thanks, Joss. This is good," I reply through a mouthful.

"I needed to take you on a date. The other guys seem to forget a girl needs attention and to feel special." He digs the spoon into his cake and slips it into his mouth. "And before you say anything, I know we're not exclusive. I’m happy you brought up the subject and were clear to us all about that."

"Mmm." Man, this cake is good. "I had to say something. The situation doesn't bother you does it?"

"Why should it? I like the idea that I can take you out and have time alone with you without causing issues between us all." He pauses. "Sorry if my response at the time sounded like I only see the situation as sex. I know we all want the physical connection, but I get as much from sitting and chatting to you.” He nudges me. “An energy boost."

With Joss, our interaction holds a closeness different to the others. I recognise his feelings as readily as he does mine, and we’re in tune in a way I’ve never felt before on an emotional level. Is that why things haven’t become physical with us? Because our bond lies on this different level? Maybe, but alone with Joss’s warmth and comfort curling around me, the same spark kindles inside as with the other guys.

The times he’s held me close, to soothe and protect, were also joined with the physical desire to wrap myself in him and us. What level would sex with Joss take me to? The intensity with Heath came from the Death within me. How would Famine manifest? Whatever happens, I’m positive it’ll be a heightened experience emotionally. I’m unsure I could cope with that right now.

Joss interrupts my musing. "I want you to be happy. We all do. Life's damn complicated right now, but everyone deserves downtime."

"You sound like Heath."

He splutters. “I'm nothing like that moody git."

"No, I mean Heath likes the ordinary in the world."

"Yeah, but when he's alone, Heath sits and overthinks everything. I switch off. Eat cake. Spend time with a beautiful woman." Joss strokes my cheek with a thumb. "Well, I don't normally find time to hang out with beautiful girls unless I'm having a really good day.”

“I guess you’re generally busy with work,” I joke.

“Exactly. Plus, you're the only one who matters now. I’m done with picking up random strangers."

"You don't want sex with other girls?"

Joss's expression contains a horror I never expected at the question. "What? No. I mean, how would you feel if that happened?"

Jealous. I lick the spoon. Is it fair to ask the guys to be faithful to me when I've indicated I won’t be exclusive to any of them? I highly doubt Xander will step down from the hook-ups the guys hint he indulges in often. "Haven't really thought about it."

He places down the spoon and takes my hands. "Vee. Everything you said was right. We're a group, and we commit to each other. It’s always been hard to find anybody outside of us we'd trust; relationships and Horsemen don’t quite mix. You bring an element we missed out on. Not because you’re truth, or female, but because you belong. I don't have any interest in jeopardising the balance by bringing in anybody else."

"Not even for one night?"

"I doubt one night with a random girl would be worth losing a chance with you. I do have a chance right?"

I squeeze his fingers. "You know the answer to that. I've been drawn to you since we met in the pub that first night. I can’t help that part of me feels selfish but—"

"But that's not helpful. It's two way, you know. We get a lot out of being with you." He rubs his lips together. "Besides, I'm hoping for extra points for buying you cake. Maybe a step up the list?"

I scowl at him.

"I'm joking!" He sips his coffee. "Do what feels natural, Vee."

I study Joss’s face as he returns to eating, my chest blooming with warmth at his words and how he treats me. I’m caught up in the intense physical attraction to Heath and Ewan, and his words from yesterday echo. He’s a “hang in the background” guy. I feel as deeply about this man as I do the others, whether that’s the supernatural bind or not.

Human Vee feels for him too.

“Joss.” He looks around and I wipe chocolate from his mouth before leaning forward and placing a soft kiss on his lips.

Joss cradles my head and moves his lips gently on mine, and the flickering need from him washes over me. I sense his affection in the kiss, and the buried desire to step from friend to lover.

"You taste even better than I thought," he whispers against my mouth. "Vee and chocolate cake." He draws his head back and licks his lips. "Amazing combination."

I snuggle into him, aware more kissing could overwhelm me, and enjoy the warmth buzzing through my veins. Sugar high and Joss high, a great combination. Joss is correct. Normality is what I need before I head into the next part of my crazy Horsemen life. His calming influence helps, but our attraction doesn't.

How the hell did I manage to share a bed with him and keep my hands to myself?

"You surprised me when you used your powers to hurt," I say. "I've only ever seen the gentle Joss."

He shifts away. "Yeah. I'm not keen on using them unless I need to."

"Why?"

"Because I'm bloody nasty." He side glances me.

"Well, Heath and Ewan aren't exactly pleasant." Or me.

Joss blows air into his cheeks. "I prefer to help out using my empathy power. I like to hang onto my humanity."

Another one? I almost say he sounds like Heath again, but he returns to his cake and silence falls. I've never seen Joss with anything but a relaxed look on his face, but now his expression matches one I've seen on all the others.

Uncertainty.

* * *

On the way back to the car, Joss takes my hand and squeezes. "You don't want to go back to the house yet, do you?"

"Not really," I admit.

"Nor me. Man, that house is bad when Xander’s stressed. The mood he’s in, it’s only a matter of time before he and Heath are at each other's throats."

"Do they ever fight? Physically I mean."

Joss laughs. "Very occasionally and it usually ends in a stalemate. We can't kill each other with our powers, but we can bloody hurt. War and Death? Fun times."

"You fight with the others? I can't imagine that."

We reach Joss's car and climb inside. "To be honest, if I get pissed off, I just walk away. Sometimes I'll inform them what dicks they're being, but I'd rather walk my anger off. I taught Xander to do the same."

I picture the house and conflict possibly happening right now. "Can we go for a walk somewhere, Joss?"

"Sure, where do you want to go?"

"Anywhere."

We drive away from Grangeton, in the opposite direction to the house, and the further we travel from town the further away from chaos I feel. I'd never considered the trauma I associated with my last week, or how much I needed some normal. My heart swells as I look at Joss who sings along to the radio, one hand on my leg.

I rest my head against the headrest. I’m the most relaxed I’ve been for weeks, even before I met the guys. We arrive at a car park at the bottom of a local National Trust walk, and Joss hops out to open my door before I can climb out.

"Is here okay? Will you be warm enough?"

The November day is crisp and bright, no rain but cooler temperatures. "Mostly.”

"Hmm." He heads around to the back of the car and opens the boot, before retuning with a beanie. "Next time we take impromptu trips, I'll make sure we have supplies."

"Good plan."

But we both know there won't be another day out together in the near future. With a Joss grin, he places the black hat on my head and yanks it down so the wool covers my ears. "You look so cute!" He grabs my face with both cool hands and kisses me with a loud "mwah.” "Let's go, beautiful Truth."