Sadie
OUR DRIVE TO Cannon Beach could only be described as idyllic. The weather was overcast and chilly, but not cold, and the traffic was almost non-existent. Very unusual for a Friday evening. We laughed, I sang out loud (badly) to the few songs I knew, all the while watching Ryder’s face soften as he’d glance at me while he drove.
“You good with one room, baby?” Ryder asked as we pulled up to the historic boutique hotel near the beach.
I smiled. “I trust you, yes.”
“Good, ’cause that’s all I booked.”
I giggled. “Figured.”
We climbed out of the car and he grabbed our bags, following me inside. Once we checked in, we headed to our room and I was a little in awe. A fireplace took up almost an entire wall, while a flat-screen TV, and huge four-poster bed sat in the spacious room, with comfy chairs turned toward the window that overlooked the ocean. There was a tile bathroom with double sinks, marble tiled shower and a separate room with a clawfoot soaking tub. “Oh my gosh, this tub is awesome. How long are we staying?”
“Just one night.” I wrinkled my nose as Ryder slid his arm around me from behind and said, “Too bad it’s not our wedding night, huh?”
I turned to face him with a nod. “Couldn’t agree with you more.”
“We’ll come back.”
“I’m sorry I’m making us wait.”
“Sadie, don’t apologize, it’s fine. You’re worth the wait and we’ll have our time.” His knuckles slid gently down my cheek. “We’ve gotten to know each other in a way that means it’s forever, and I love that we have that foundation.” He smiled. “I already know the rest is gonna be good, so I’m not worried.”
“It’s just going to be good?” I challenged.
Ryder chuckled. “It’s gonna blow your mind, but I don’t want you obsessin’ on your mind being blown.”
I ran my palms across his chest. “Any obsessing would only be about how we need to get it on sooner than later.”
He dropped his head back and laughed. “Get it on?”
“Isn’t that how the kids are sayin’ it?”
“Shit, baby, you’re funny.”
“Thank you.” I wrapped my arms around his waist and kissed the base of his throat. “I’m hungry.”
“Well, then, I better feed my woman, huh?”
“That’d probably be a good idea.”
He kissed me gently and then led me out of the room.
Bundling up, we walked down to the intimate restaurant and were led to our table, which had a beautiful view of the water. The table was romantically laid out and the sun was beginning to set on the horizon. Ryder pulled the waiter aside after we were taken to our seats and returned quickly, reaching his hand across the table to take mine.
“What was that all about?” I asked.
“You know, for an ex-nun, you ask a lot of questions.”
“Nuns don’t ask questions?” I challenged.
He chuckled and shook his head.
The waiter brought a basket of bread and glasses of water before walking away again. I studied the menu, but I was distracted. Ryder was up to something, and since I wasn’t a fan of surprises, even good ones, I kept glancing at him over the menu.
“You want me to order for you?” he offered.
“No, I want you to tell me what you’re up to.”
“All in due time, babycakes.”
I snorted and lowered my menu. “Babycakes?”
“Tryin’ it out, what do you think?”
“I think you’re trying to distract me.”
Before he could respond, the waiter returned, setting a plate with a silver dome on top on the table. He left again and then Ryder rose to his feet. I held my tongue, even though I wanted to pepper him with questions.
“Want to lift that lid for me?” Ryder asked.
I did as he asked. A red leather box sat in the middle of a round, white plate and I gasped. Ryder snagged the box and knelt in front of me. “Sadie Anna Ross, will you do me the honor of marrying me? Your aunt has already given us her blessing.”
“She has?”
Ryder nodded.
“Yes, yes, yes,” I said, excitedly.
He opened the box and I couldn’t stop a quiet squeak at the sight of the platinum and diamond ring with a princess-cut diamond surrounded by round pave-set diamonds. “Ryder, it’s amazing.”
He slid the ring on my finger and it fit perfectly.
I heard applause and glanced around the small restaurant. Blushing, I smiled at the other diners as they joined in our joy. Rising to his feet again, Ryder kissed me and then I had the chance to study the rock. Rows of pave-set diamonds on the ring had an intricate milligrain design around the entire band. “This diamond is huge.”
“It’s three carats, baby, but we can always take it back for something smaller.”
I bit my lip and shook my head. “I know it’s hard to take the nun out of the girl, but I love, love, love this. I don’t want anything smaller.”
“Good.”
“I thought we agreed nothing public.”
He grinned. “I needed a couple of witnesses.”
“Fair enough,” I conceded. And secretly, I felt quite proud that he was my fiancé. I might not be the type to scream it to the world, but I liked that a few people saw him being romantic.
He slid my hair behind my back, fisting it into a ponytail, and kissed me again. “Short engagement, yeah?”
“Most definitely.”
I smiled. “I love you, Ryder Carsen.”
“Love you too, Sadie Ross soon to be Carsen.”
“Mmm, Sadie Carsen sounds awesome.”
“I agree.”
The waiter returned with congratulations and took our order. Ryder ordered wine, insisting I try it since it would go perfectly with our meal, and I was pleasantly surprised I liked it. “You’re keeping your promise.”
“I am?” he asked.
“You said you’d expand my alcohol palate.”
“I guess I did.” He chuckled. “Your eloquence is far better than mine.”
“In what way?”
“I’m pretty sure I said I’d corrupt you so you’d have to go to confession every day, but expanding your palate works too.”
I broke a piece of bread and buttered it. “So far I’m holding onto my virtue... at least when I’m awake.”
“That doesn’t bode well for me.”
“How come?”
“Think back, baby. You’ve been having nightmares quite a bit since...”
“And your point?” I asked, popping a piece of bread in my mouth.
“You wound me.” Ryder sat back a little with a smug smile. “But that’s okay, Sadie. I’m lookin’ forward to givin’ you somethin’ to dream about in real time.”
I swallowed with a shiver and bit my lip. “This is unnecessary torture, Ryder.”
“No,” he countered. “Unnecessary torture would be if I told you everything I plan to do to you on our wedding night.”
“Like what?” I challenged.
His finger traced a line down my breast toward my nipple. “Like, running my tongue—”
“Got it!” I said, cutting him off. “Oh my gosh, Ryder, you’re so mean.”
He grinned. “I’ll make it up to you, baby. Promise.”
I squirmed in my seat. “That doesn’t help.”
“Let’s set a date.”
“Tomorrow.”
He laughed. “Works for me.”
“I really don’t want a big wedding, but I would like to get married in my church, and I’d love Michael to officiate.”
“Can he?” Ryder asked.
“He’s performed several weddings since he’s been at the church, so I’m guessing that he can,” I said. “But we can find out for sure.”
“I’m good with that.”
“Even with Michael?”
“Yeah, honey. He’ll be marrying us.” He leaned forward and took my hand again. “Until death do us part... he’ll say those words. So, yeah, I’m fine with it.”
I smiled, squeezing his hand. “You’ve obviously thought about this.”
“I’m the romantic in this, remember? Yeah, I’ve thought about it.”
I giggled. “Well, I have too.”
“Yeah?”
I nodded. “I found my dress.”
“No shit?”
“Yep. About a month ago. Online.”
“Did you order it?”
I blushed and shook my head. “It’s more than I expected to spend.”
“You got the money?”
“Technically, yes. But it’s not really part of my budgeted spenditure for the year.”
“Then get what you want, Sadie.”
“You think?” I asked.
“Yeah, honey. I’m takin’ care of the rest, so you get the dress you want.”
I grinned. “You’re taking care of the rest?”
“Yeah.”
“I don’t expect you to do that, Ryder.”
“Sade, in the end, it’s our money, right?”
“I guess so.”
“So, you gonna buy that dress tomorrow?”
“You really think I should?”
“Yep.”
“Ryder,” I whispered. “It’s two thousand dollars.”
“That’s it?”
“That’s a lot to spend on a dress I’m only going to wear once.”
“Do you love it?”
I bit my lip.
“Sade? Do you love it?” he asked again.
“Yes. I really love it.”
“Then buy it.”
I giggled. “Okay then.”
“That’s my girl,” he said, and squeezed my hand again.
Dinner arrived, interrupting any more discussion about the dress, so we ate then we headed out for a walk on the beach.
“What else do you want?” Ryder asked as we stopped for me to take off my shoes.
“For the wedding?”
“Yeah, baby. If we’re puttin’ plans in motion, I want it to be perfect.”
“Simple, honey. I just want everything to be simple. I don’t need fancy.” I smiled. “Just you, me, Scottie, Molly, and my aunt... um, Laura and Bethany... and anyone you want there, of course.” I’d worn shoes with laces, so I tied them together and took Ryder’s hand. “You’re not going to take your boots off?”
“Too cold.”
I bumped into him gently as we walked. “Wimp.”
He faced me and cupped my cheeks. “I love you.”
“Yes, honey, I know.” I leaned against him with a frown. “Are you okay?”
“Just got a bad feelin’.”
“Well, please stow that feeling until after our romantic night away. I don’t want anything to ruin this.”
He chuckled. “Nothin’ is gonna ruin this.”
“Yeah, I know, because my man’s gonna smile and make out with me on the beach.”
“Yeah he is.”
I reached up and stroked his beard. “Are you worried about something specific?”
“Honestly? Yeah a little. Hatch has never been this quiet. I don’t like that I don’t have eyes on him.”
“But he’s not here, right?”
“No, baby, he’s not here.”
I raised an eyebrow. “Which is why we’re here.”
“No, Sadie, we’re here because I had a plan to propose.”
“I wouldn’t be mad if it was all rolled into one, Ryder. I’m just asking.”
He smiled. “I hear you, baby, but no, this has been planned for a while. The Hatch shit just happens to coincide.”
“Okay then, for tonight, I call dibs on your mind and body.” I tapped his cheek. “We’ll deal with the rest when we get back to reality.”
“Fair enough.” He leaned in and kissed me gently.
“How fast can you run in those boots?”
“Pretty fast.”
“Yeah?”
“Yeah, baby.”
“Race you to the water,” I yelled after I’d already taken off.
I almost made it (and I’m pretty sure he let me), before he’d grabbed me around the waist. Despite the fact I somewhat expected it, I let out a squeal when he lifted me off my feet and threatened to drop me in the ocean.
I locked my arms around his neck. “You wouldn’t.”
“Make it so you have to strip down to nothing?”
“Okay, you would.” I smiled and attempted to bat my eyelashes. “But I’d appreciate it if you wouldn’t.”
“Do you have sand in your eyes?”
“No!” I said on a groan.
“Well, then what the hell are you doing with your face?”
“I was trying to flirt.” At his laugh I scowled. “I’ll remind you that in section four-point-one of the fiancée handbook you’re required to think I’m cute at all times.”
“There’s a handbook?”
I nodded.
He dropped his head back and laughed again. “I love you, you strange, strange woman.”
I grinned, leaning forward to kiss him. “Love you too.”
“How do you feel about ice cream?”
“Ryder,” I admonished. “You are very aware that if it were legal, I’d marry ice cream, so that’s kind of a dumb question.”
He chuckled, but before he could tell me why he asked the question, the heavens opened up and proceeded to dump water on us. I couldn’t stop a frustrated growl.
“Jump up, baby,” Ryder ordered, and pointed to his back.
“Seriously?”
“Yeah, I can get us back before you can even get your shoes on.”
“Okey doke,” I said, and jumped onto his back.
Ryder piggybacked me the entire way back to our hotel, and he was right, we got back quicker than I could have put my shoes back on, however, we were soaked through and I was freezing.
Ryder set me down inside the building and we rushed to our room. “You get your clothes off, honey, and put the robe on in the bathroom. I’ll run the bath.”
My teeth chattered as I nodded. “Okay. Thanks.”
I did as he suggested and stepped out of the bathroom and into the little room with the tub. Ryder ran his hand in the water and smiled. “I’ll shower while you’re soaking.” He stepped out of the room and closed the door.
“We never got that ice cream,” I called as I slid into the water.
“I’ve got your back, honey,” he promised “I’ll have someone bring it up.”
“I love you!” He laughed and then I heard the shower start. I didn’t get out of the tub until Ryder informed me the ice cream had arrived. I hurried to get dressed and joined Ryder back in the room quickly.
“Warm?” Ryder asked, wrapping an arm around me and kissing me gently.
“Very.” I slid my hands up his chest. “I love this shirt.”
“Yeah?”
“It’s soft and it matches your eyes.”
“Good to know.” He smiled. “You ready for ice cream?”
“Definitely.”
“I hope you like cherry.”
I screwed up my nose. “Please tell me you’re joking.”
“You don’t like cherry? Damn it. It’s what we’ve got.”
“You can have it.”
Ryder laughed. “I would never do that to you, Sadie. What kind of monster do you think I am?”
“The kind to mess with his fiancée.” I wagged a finger at him. “I will reference section six-point-three in the fiancée handbook. Never mess with a woman’s ice cream.”
“I apologize.” He kissed my nose. “Now come get your weird-ass pecan praline.”
I giggled, taking the dish and spoon on the coffee table and settling into one of the chairs overlooking the water. Ryder had started the fire and the whole scene was just perfect.
Ryder sat beside me and waved his spoon toward me. “You know I’m gonna eat that off every inch of your body one day.”
I gasped, choking on the bite I just took.
“Sorry, baby,” he said as I coughed, trying to breathe. “Didn’t mean to freak you out.”
“You’re an evil man,” I accused once I got my breath.
“You wanna know what else I’m gonna do?”
“No! It’s hard enough waiting.”
“I know.” He grinned. “Okay, baby, I’m done.”
“You’re a butt.”
“Yep, I’m aware.”
“But I love you anyway.”
“I know.”
I smiled and took another bite. Ryder set his ice cream aside and reached for my feet, shifting the chair so we were face to face. He wrapped his hands around my feet and proceeded to massage them as I ate ice cream and watched the rain.
“I could so get used to this.”
Ryder grinned. “I got my Sadie’s servant card back. I plan to keep it.”
“Works for me.”
“Where do you want to honeymoon?” he asked.
“I haven’t thought about it. What about you?”
“It’s a toss-up between somewhere warm, which means you’re in a bikini the whole time, or somewhere cold where I can keep you naked and warm in bed.”
“I vote cold.”
“Yeah? Stateside or international?”
“Stateside. I don’t want to spend money on a passport and international flight if we’re just going to be in bed the whole time.”
“Good thinking,” he said. “Maine? Sometime after the new year?”
“I can’t take the time off, honey. Not when I get all that time off during the holidays.”
“Then, let’s do it during your holidays.”
“Seriously? That’s a month away.”
“I know.”
I pulled my feet from his hands and leaned forward. “Are you insane?”
He leaned forward as well. “Yep.”
I bit my lip. “Okay then.”
“Okay then what?”
“Let’s do it.”
“Yeah?”
I nodded. “It’s crazy, but yes.”
He cupped my cheeks and kissed me. “Love you, baby.”
“Love you too.”
I giggled as he pulled me to my feet and danced me around the room. As he spun me toward him, the sash on my robe untied and my robe gaped open.
“Fuck,” Ryder hissed and slid his arms around my waist. “Baby, you’re stunning. I knew you would be, but…holy shit…” He knelt in front of me and kissed my belly and I knew I should stop him, but I couldn’t.
I wove my fingers into his hair as he peppered kisses on my belly before standing again. Cupping my breasts, he gave each nipple a gentle suck, then closed the robe and tied the robe in a double knot…doing the one thing I knew I didn’t have the strength to do. “Short engagement,” he whispered, and covered my mouth with his.
“I don’t want to wait,” I whispered as I broke the kiss.
“For the wedding?”
I shook my head. “For the wedding night.”
“Baby,” he rasped.
I untied my robe and let it fall to the floor.
Ryder stroked my cheek. “Are you sure?”
“I’ve been sure for weeks,” I admitted. “Do you have condoms?”
“Yeah.”
“Really?”
“Ex Boy Scout, Sade. Always prepared.”
I giggled. “Okay, then, I’m in your hands. I have no clue what I’m doing.”
“I don’t know—”
I tugged at the waistband of his jeans. “I want this, Ryder.”
He cupped my breast and gently squeezed as I arched into him. Gently drawing a nipple into his mouth, and then moving to the other, I sighed as he kissed between my breasts and then focused on my mouth again. I moved my hands so I could unbutton his shirt, sliding my hands to open it. He was magnificent.
I bit my lip and ran my fingers down his abs.
His stomach contracted and he pulled my fingers to his lips. “You keep doing that, this’ll end too soon for my liking.”
I bit my lip, but I nodded. “I want to see you. You know, the front of you.”
“My ass wasn’t enough for you, huh?”
“Not even close,” I admitted. Ryder grinned and slipped his shirt off and I was in awe. I leaned forward and kissed his smooth chest with a smile. “Perfect.”
He kissed me again as he unzipped my jeans. His hand slid between my legs and I squirmed at his touch, his hand cupping me. “Open, baby.”
I shifted so he could slide his hand further between my legs and then he slipped a finger inside of me and I whimpered.
He pulled back. “Does that hurt?”
I shook my head, gripping his arm. “More.”
Ryder lifted me and carried me to the bed, settling me gently on the mattress. Gripping my thighs gently, he settled his face between them and kissed the top of each. “Gorgeous.”
“Ryder,” I rasped as his mouth covered my core. I slipped my fingers into his hair as he gently sucked on my clit and I couldn’t stop myself from bucking against his mouth. This made him grip my thighs harder and keep me in place, but it did not make him remove his mouth. I let out a quiet squeak as his tongue slipped inside of me and I felt a little like I was floating. His mouth moved back to my clit and he slipped a finger inside of me and I whimpered as I came.
I glanced down my body to watch as he continued to kiss me intimately and then he raised up and leaned over me. “I love you.”
“I love you, too,” I whispered.
Ryder moved his way back up, ending at my neck and cupping my breast as he kissed me again.
“I want you naked.” I reached up to stroke his cheek.
“You will, baby.” He smiled. “We need to go slow. This is going to hurt a little and I want you relaxed.”
“Relax me without your clothes on.” I slid my hand to cup him over his jeans. I could feel his size through the denim and he was huge. He smiled and stood, pushing his jeans and boxer briefs off, and facing me again. I swallowed.
His expression became one of concern. “Are you okay?”
“There’s no way that’s going to fit,” I whispered.
Ryder chuckled and crawled over me, kissing between my breasts. “Trust me?”
I cupped his face as he hovered over me. “Yes.”
“I’m gonna take care of you, sweetheart, but you ever want to stop, tell me.”
“Even—”
“Yes. You want to stop, we stop.” He leaned closer. “Got it?”
I nodded.
“Say the words, Sadie.”
“You’ll stop if I ask you to.”
“Exactly,” he whispered, and kissed me. He rolled us onto our sides again and cupped my bottom, guiding my thigh over his hip. He slid his hand between us and slipped a finger inside. “Soaked, baby.”
I nodded. “Is that okay?”
“It’s perfect, honey. Better than perfect.”
“Are you sure?”
“Baby, are you enjoying yourself?”
“Yes,” I panted as he slipped another finger inside of me.
“Then it’s perfect.”
Before I could say anymore, he kissed me, sliding his tongue into my mouth and capturing my sigh. I heard the tear of foil and then he rolled on a condom and positioned me so I was straddling him.
“I’m gonna go slow, Sadie. Let you get used to me. You can pull back if it’s too much. It’s why we’re like this. You have more power.”
I licked my lips. “Okay.”
“Lift up a bit.” I did as he asked and he positioned his cock at my entrance. “Now, lower yourself. Slowly, baby.”
I slid slowly onto him and bit my lip as his girth filled me.
“Okay?”
“So good,” I rasped.
I shifted and slid a little lower, then a little more. All the while, he worked my nipples, my clit, my mouth. I had to give it to him, he waited until I was no longer fully coherent before he rolled me onto my back and gave one swift push. I felt the sting of my virginity leaving my body and he caught my cry with his mouth and stilled.
Ryder kissed me gently. “Are you okay?”
I smiled, shifting so I could stroke his cheek. “I’m good. Are we done?”
“Not even close.”
“Promise?”
He chuckled. “Promise.” Ryder kissed me and then drew my nipple into his mouth, then the other. Sliding his hand between us, he fingered my clit and I couldn’t help but rock my hips against him, which pulled him further inside of me.
“Yes,” I whispered. “More.”
He thrust into me and I raised my legs, wrapping my ankles around his hips. He continued to surge into me, until my climax overtook me.
I came undone just as he gave one final thrust and a grunt, then rolled us onto our sides again. He ran his finger down my cheek. “You okay?”
“I’m so much better than okay.” I licked my lips. “When can we do that again?”
He chuckled. “Soon. We need to give your body a minute to recover.”
I wrinkled my nose. “Oh.”
“Brace, Sadie, I’m gonna slide out and it may sting a bit.”
“’K.” I gripped his shoulders as he moved his hips away from me. He was right, I was a little sore, but it didn’t take away from the fact that he’d made my first time incredibly perfect. Now I just needed to figure out what to do with my Catholic guilt.
“Don’t move,” he said, and kissed me gently. “I’ll be right back.”
I nodded with a smile and he climbed off the bed and headed into the bathroom. I bit my lip in an effort not to squeak at the sight of him walking away. His butt really was delicious. I heard the toilet flush and then Ryder returned with a warm washcloth.
“Spread, baby.” I did and he settled the soft cloth against me, soothing the sting. “Feel good?”
“Very,” I whispered on a yawn.
He threw the washcloth into the corner, then pulled me close. “Sleep, Sadie.”
I snuggled closer to him and closed my eyes.
* * *
Ryder and I’d arrived back from our love bubble trip (as we were referring to it) late Saturday night. I stayed at his place and then drove home Sunday night.
I arrived home to squeals and congratulations from Laura and Bethany, followed quickly by over-the-top planning. Luckily, I knew them well enough now that I could control the tornado that was Bethany Corona, and we ended up with the plan that she’d do my makeup and Laura would be my attendant. Worked for me and no feelings were hurt, which meant I could enjoy my day with both my girls being happy.
I ordered the dress. It took me five minutes to actually press the submit order button, but I did it. I really hoped it fit, but I’d find out in less than a week and then I could move forward from there.
My aunt and Michael found a date that worked for everyone. It was the Saturday directly following the last day of school, which was somewhat of a miracle, but our ceremony would be intimate, which meant it would be short. The party afterwards would be at Ryder’s... ah, our home... that evening.
Ryder wouldn’t tell me anything about our honeymoon. He wanted to handle all of arrangements and I was happy with that.