Chapter Eleven
TRISTAN CALLED on Sunday evening. He was home from the hospital, planning to take a couple days off and then work part-time for a week or two. And he agreed to Liam’s proposal, in principle.
“It’s a good solution, really,” the old man said. “I’m not interested in the business side of things, and you are. If I have someone on hand to take care of the niggling day-to-day bureaucracy, it’ll free up more of my time for my serious projects. My passion.”
“That’s not quite what I had in mind,” Liam said, but he didn’t push it too hard. Tristan was saving face, trying to put a positive spin on things for himself and probably for his inner circle. “We can discuss details over the next couple weeks, get the lawyers involved to make sure everything’s clear. But in the meantime, I’ll go into the office tomorrow and provide some continuity. Do you want to draft up an announcement email for the staff and run it by me before you send it, or do you want me to draft it and run it by you?”
“Run it by—Jesus, Liam, I am not going to look for your approval of every communication I have with my staff. If you think this agreement is going to give you that sort of power, you need to think again!”
“No, of course not, just like I won’t run every email by you. But something this big, something that involves both of us equally, should be collaborative, right? I assume you wouldn’t appreciate it if I sent out an email announcing this to the staff without giving you a voice.”
“What are you planning on announcing, exactly? We haven’t worked out the details, yet. We may not be able to work out the details, and the whole thing will fall through.”
“Yes, that’s the sort of finesse we’ll need to come up with together. The staff will need to be told something in order to explain my presence tomorrow, but we won’t want to tell them too much. It’ll be a fine balance—do you want to draft up the first version or should I?”
This was what Liam was signing up for? A long future of placating a grumpy invalid who thought Liam was some sort of executive assistant?
No. It was a prestigious firm; it produced important work, and Liam would be part of that. A big part. A creative part, not just an administrator. This was a good thing.
He threw himself into the new challenge. Long days all week long, dealing with staff, networking with clients, and even, when he could find some time, working on projects. More idea bouncing than really getting into the details of things, but that was to be expected. And he didn’t really mind.
He went home late every night, usually after dinners with clients or colleagues, and fell into bed exhausted.
He was important, he was successful, his career was intense and exciting. It was what he’d always wanted.
And when Calvin phoned on Thursday night, it was the most exciting thing that happened all week.
Not actively exciting. More actively bewildering, as was usual with Calvin.
“I was just calling to check whether you were going to be here in time for dinner tomorrow night,” the old man said, sounding completely reasonable.
“Uh… what? Dinner?”
“You weren’t thinking of driving up Saturday morning, I hope? We need to get started first thing, Liam. I want us on the ground, at work, by eight. Maybe nine at the absolute latest. I think you need to come up the night before. I’ve got Ben’s old room cleared out a bit, enough that you can at least find the bed. You can stay there instead of at the B&B.”
“Calvin. What are you talking about?”
“You’re not trying to back out, are you? Come on, boy! We need you!”
Liam decided to try another tack. “Can you tell me what I should be bringing? Like… tools?” Because if they were on the ground at work, that meant something physical, didn’t it?
“I’ve got all that taken care of. Just bring work clothes, steel-toed boots—you’ve got a hard hat, right? I wouldn’t bother with all that if it was just me, but because this is kind of official, we need to be more careful. Follow all the rules, make sure the insurance guys are happy….” Calvin stopped talking, clearly expecting more questions, more absurdity, but Liam had been sitting at the computer when Calvin called, and there had been enough clues in the conversation for a quick internet search. The North Falls municipal website had a banner headline advertising their big event.
“Is Community Circle just a Habitat for Humanity rip-off?” Liam asked. “Charities are great, but so’s originality.”
It didn’t take Calvin long to realize Liam was on to him and catch up. “I’ll be sure to let the Bindermans—they’re the family that’s moving in, after hopping from one rental to another for the last eight years—know you think their home is derivative.”
“I’m really looking forward to seeing little Julia’s face when she gets a look at the backyard,” Liam responded, skimming the article in front of him for any more tidbits. “We’re building a play structure for her, right?”
“I’m not sure it’s in the plans, but maybe there’ll be some extra materials… now if only we knew an architect who could draw something up.”
Taybec Briggs, eat your heart out. No time for your three-hundred-million-dollar project… I’m designing play structures now!
The whole thing was ridiculous. Liam shouldn’t give in to Calvin’s nonsense, shouldn’t even consider making the drive up to North Falls, absolutely couldn’t afford to take time off from the firm right then, not even on a weekend. No. It couldn’t happen. No way.
“I won’t be there until after dinner,” he heard himself say. “I might be fairly late. Eleven or so?” That would give him time to take the staff out for a round or two of drinks to celebrate the new management at the firm. He needed to make sure they were all firmly on his side before Tristan came back early next week. That was important. This project in the Falls? It wasn’t something he could allow to distract him. “And are you sure it’s okay for me to sleep at your place? I could call the B&B again, but I didn’t really get the impression they were the type to appreciate late arrivals.”
“I’ll be up. Or if you’re really late, you can just let yourself in. You know where the room is.”
They said goodbye and Liam was left staring at his phone in bemusement. Yeah, he knew where Ben’s old room was. He knew the room far too well. It was where he and Ben had spent so much time, through so many stages of their young lives. Innocent childhood games, Seth often included, and different kinds of games later, ones Seth was definitely not part of.
Ben and Liam had snuck in and out of that room through the door, down the hallway right past Calvin’s room; or through the window, hanging and dropping or clambering up the wall using the window sills as roosting points. None of it had been necessary—Calvin hadn’t been the curfew type and had been more likely to make fun of misbehavior rather than punishing for it, but sneaking had been part of the fun.
Part of it. But being with Ben had been the main draw. And Liam had thrown it all away.
Now he was going back to wallow in it all.
No, he was going back to help build a damn house for a family struggling with poverty.
It made almost less sense, really, but it was what he’d agreed to. Well, what he’d failed to not agree to, at least.
Stupid decision. Absolutely the wrong time for it, from Liam’s perspective. And from Ben’s? Because, of course, that was what this was really all about. It would have been easy to say “no” to Calvin if this had just been one of the old guy’s crazy projects. But it was a crazy project with the likelihood of Ben time, so weak, stupid Liam had been powerless to resist. Now that he was off the phone, though, now that the first burst of excitement had started to fade, he remembered Ben’s distinct lack of enthusiasm at Liam’s last visit. There was absolutely no reason to think Ben was looking for a repeat performance.
But Ben hadn’t been the one to invite him. Ben might not even be at the project. Just because he was Ben the Kind, Ben the Generous, Ben the People Person, Ben who probably started the damn Community Circle? None of that meant Ben would be at this particular event. Calvin hadn’t mentioned him, Liam hadn’t mentioned him, and it wasn’t like North Falls wasn’t Liam’s hometown at least as much as it was Ben’s.
Liam was really looking forward to helping out and giving back. He was excited about little—he took a quick peek at the online article—little Julia Bindermans’s new home. Nothing to do with Ben. Just being a good guy and helping out.
Liam clicked his laptop lid down and pushed away from the table where he’d been working. He needed to get some sleep, needed to make sure he was well rested. He had a big day ahead of him, and a big weekend after that.
He headed for the bathroom to clean up, then to bed, and he thought about North Falls all the way. The project, and who he might see there, and no, of course, no expectations, but, still, if they were spending time together….
Just harmless daydreams. That was all.
Liam let himself fall asleep with thoughts of Ben and North Falls dancing through his head instead of the work-related ideas that had been occupying him all week, and his sleep was long and peaceful.
BEN HAD always liked building things, and building a home for a student at his school was even more satisfying than regular projects. And, if he was being honest with himself, it was nice to have a distraction from all the thoughts of Liam and all the speculation about what might have been, if things had been only a little bit different. If they’d been more mature, more able to handle a relationship back in college. If Liam hadn’t been such a cheating bastard. If—and this one was tougher to think about, but also more intriguing—if Liam hadn’t had to leave the week before. If he’d stayed, if he and Ben had talked, if they’d both said all the right things at all the right times? What would have happened?
Maybe nothing. Maybe seeing each other again, clearing the air, and moving on had been the best resolution to it all. But what if… oh, damn, what if….
“You’re looking bright and cheerful,” Dinah said from the big chair on her front porch. She must have been watching him as he walked down the street and he’d been too involved in his thoughts to even notice. Damn, had he been making faces? He was pretty sure he hadn’t actually wrapped his arms around himself and started rubbing while he smooched the air, so things weren’t as bad as they could have been.
He pulled himself together enough to respond. “It’s a beautiful day, I’m going to be with beautiful people, and we’re going to do a beautiful thing. How could I not be cheerful?”
“Beautiful people?” she said. “Does that mean Calvin told you? When I heard, I was worried he hadn’t.”
“Told me what? Heard what?”
“About Liam? Seth just called from the site—I’m surprised he didn’t sleep over there, he’s so wrapped up in all this. If I wasn’t pregnant, he probably would have—and he said Calvin showed up with Liam. And—you didn’t know he was there. He wasn’t who you meant by ‘beautiful people.’” Dinah clearly saw the confusion on Ben’s face and was generous enough to give him a little time to recover. “So you must have meant me as the beautiful people! You must have noticed my glow! Yes, some people would say it’s just gestational hypertension, but you and I know the truth, right?”
“You always look beautiful,” Ben said absently. Then, “Why would Liam come to this?”
“I can only imagine,” Dinah said, her tone dry.
Ben squinted at her. What was she trying to say? “He’s here already? From the city?”
“Came up last night, apparently. Stayed at Calvin’s.”
Calvin. Of course. After all these years, Ben should have learned. At the first sign of anything confusing or hard to explain, he should just assume Uncle Calvin had caused it and move on with his life. Bermuda Triangle, crop circles, weeping statues—Uncle Calvin’s work, all of it. Liam coming back to North Falls? Maybe Uncle Calvin hadn’t been responsible for the first visit (or for all the unnoticed visits that had apparently come before, if they were even real) but Calvin had definitely been doing everything he could to get Liam back ever since. And he was Uncle Calvin, so he succeeded in causing mischief where a mere mortal would have failed and surrendered the effort.
“He’s going to help?” Ben asked. “With the house? That’s why he’s here?”
“Apparently,” Dinah said.
Well, it was pretty hard for Ben to object to a certified architect taking part in a charitable building project. And pretty hard for Ben to withdraw his own participation, considering he was the one who’d brought the Bindermans’s plight to the Community Circle’s attention. Which meant he’d better start getting his game face on: more Liam time was imminent.
“Seth said he was helpful with the raspberries,” Dinah said. She set down the book she’d been reading and pulled herself upright. She and Ben had arranged to walk over to the work site together, but Ben wondered if there was a way he could suggest they drive. He actually wondered if there was a way he could suggest that Dinah stay home with her feet up; she wasn’t hugely pregnant yet and she was good with tools, but, really, she was pregnant enough, and there were lots of people who’d promised to help out. Was there really any need for Dinah’s body to do more work than it already was?
But Dinah was the best judge of that, of course. And Seth would have already brought the topic up, surely. So….
Dinah held her arms out to her sides as if to display that she was, indeed, prepared, and they started walking.
“Why would he come?” Ben asked.
“Liam?”
Yes, obviously Liam, but possibly Dinah’s mind wasn’t quite one-track enough to have picked up on Ben’s obsession. So he tried to keep his nod polite rather than sarcastic.
“I guess he’s just a good guy?” Dinah suggested. Her voice was suspiciously innocent when she added, “Unless you think there’s something else going on?”
“Like what? He’s got his big important life in the city, after all. No reason for him to be back here, not that I can think of.”
“Really? You don’t think maybe he’s… interested?”
Ben was tempted to push it a little further. Could he keep pretending he didn’t know what she was talking about long enough that she gave up? Maybe—she was pretty generous about stuff like that. But he didn’t really want her to give up. He wanted to talk about this. Not that he had anything at all coherent to say. He made a sort of Wookie noise that he hoped conveyed his frustration, confusion, and ignorance, and waited to see Dinah’s reaction.
She raised an eyebrow and didn’t seem too impressed with the nonverbal approach. “We never got around to Liam the other day in our what-if game, did we?”
She knew damn well they hadn’t. Now, on this sunny morning, on the way to their good deed, a good deed at which Ben would be seeing Liam again… what if?
Was Ben brave enough to even let himself ask that question?
He couldn’t get into the mechanics of it, didn’t want to think about how it might have happened, but… what if he and Liam had stayed together?
But the game didn’t work if he didn’t think about the “how.” “Are we saying he never cheated on me? Or he cheated on me but we got past it, somehow? Oh, God, we’d better not be saying I just kept ignoring it! I didn’t just put up with it, did I?”
“Kept ignoring it?”
Yeah, of course Dinah would pick up on that. But Ben had wanted to talk about this, hadn’t he? He took a deep breath. “We’d better not be saying I stayed that insecure and scared. Better not be saying I was always so afraid of losing him that I kept on ignoring the problem instead of dealing with it.”
“And suddenly I’m a little less favorably disposed toward Liam Marshall. This was an ongoing thing, and you knew about it, and you thought he’d dump you if you called him on it?”
“I think—I’m pretty sure he wanted me to dump him. That way he wouldn’t have to do it himself, you know? He wouldn’t have to be the one to pull the plug.”
“What a weenie.”
“Yeah, but I was a weenie too, right? He should have had the guts to dump me, and I should have had the guts to dump him.”
“So you weren’t really a good couple? The way Seth talks makes it sound like you were meant for each other.”
Difficult question. Impossible question, probably. But Ben needed this conversation, so he tried. “We were each other’s first and only boyfriends. I know that works for some people—they marry their high school sweethearts and are never even tempted to look at anyone else. But I don’t think it would have worked for Liam and me. We both wanted—experiences. Adventures. We wanted to learn things firsthand.”
“And you got to learn about broken hearts, firsthand.”
“I did. I don’t know about Liam.”
She didn’t say anything in reply, which was just as well because they were getting close to the building site and Ben needed a little time to regain his composure. But as they approached the gravel driveway and raised their arms to wave at the people already assembled, Dinah turned to face Ben and said, “Do you want Seth and me to run interference today? Keep him away from you?”
“No. I’m—I was going to say ‘fine,’ but I think ‘okay’ might be better. I’m stable. And I don’t want to hide from him.”
“We could arrange a power-tool accident, if you thought it was justified. I don’t think we should kill him, but a nail gun aimed at extremities would probably get him off the site for the day.”
Right. Hiding wasn’t really in Dinah’s vocabulary, not if attacking was a remotely viable option. “No, it’ll be fine.”
Ben turned toward the site and saw Liam already standing there beside Uncle Calvin, the two of them intently examining a stack of blueprints stretched out on a makeshift table. Liam was an architect; his dream had come true, and now he was using his hard-won knowledge to help others. He was a good guy. He’d screwed up, sure, but—a good guy, deep down. His extremities should remain unblemished by nail guns; Ben could give him that much.
“Let me know if you change your mind,” Dinah said. Then she stomped up the driveway, her work boots a strange complement to her pregnant belly, and Ben followed in her wake.