Light reflects off the shiny quarter as it flips through the air. I reach up and catch it, then bring it down onto my hand. As soon as I move my fingers, I see that it’s tails side up.

My heart sinks.

As much as I hate dancing, I don’t want to go home.

“Well, what is it?” Ana asks eagerly, leaning forward. A curtain of dark hair falls over her shoulder. Her green eyes light up and her lips pull back in a smile. She’s like a breath of fresh air, a little quirky and a tad innocent. Yet I can tell there is pain behind her eyes, and darkness she’ll do anything to not go back to.

I don’t want to disappoint her.

And I really don’t know why. She’s an author I’m editing for, and there have been many authors I’ve worked with I’d never consider a friend. I fix their novel, and then we’re done. We don’t stay in contact. Don’t hang out. And I certainly don’t feel the urge to strip them down and fuck them hard, like I do with Ana.

“Heads,” I say, bending my fingers around the coin. “I guess I have to dance.”

She smiles wide, nose scrunching up a bit and takes another drink before standing. “Come on,” she says, holding out her hand. I smile back and shake my head, taking her hand. She leads me to the dance floor, and besides two drunk college-aged girls celebrating a friend’s twenty-first birthday, we’re the only ones out here. Immediately, I feel stupid.

I’m in my thirties…way too old to be stumbling around the dance floor. This isn’t professional. If any of the publishers saw me—with my author no less—they’d write off that promotion faster than the birthday girl over there downing her drinks. I’m about ready to tell Ana no, this just isn’t me, when she puts her hands on my waist.

I turn my gaze down, away from the people at the bar who aren’t even giving a fuck about two random people on the dance floor and look into Ana’s eyes.

“I’m not a good dancer,” I admit.

“Put your arms around me,” she instructs. She must not feel the same attraction that I do, must not be fighting off dirty thoughts left and right. My jaw tenses as I raise my arms, letting my fingers settle on the curve of her waist. “Relax,” she goes on. “And follow my lead.”

She starts swaying back and forth in tempo with the music, moving her hands up to my shoulders. She feels good under my fingers. Her dress is made out of a thin and soft fabric, allowing the heat of her skin to seep through and tease me.

The song ends and another starts up right away. We keep dancing, and by the time another song starts and ends, I’m having fun too. The music slows, and Ana steps in closer.

“I’ve never done this before,” she confesses, tipping her head up. We’re moving together in perfect harmony.

“Danced?”

“No, been the first ones out here like this. Now look at the floor.”

“I didn’t even notice.”

“Neither did I,” she says, a little out of breath, and looks at the crowd around us. We weave our way back to the bar and get another drink. Ana goes to the bathroom and comes back with a crinkled piece of blue paper. “Is it too late to go on this?”

“On what?”

“This.” She extends her hand, showing me a flyer for the Friedsam Memorial Carousel.

“I honestly have no idea. I haven’t been on that thing since I was five.”

She raises an eyebrow. “You stopped going on carousels at five?”

“Yeah,” I say, brow furrowing. “My dad said I was too old, but he was also kind of an ass…who I haven’t seen in over fifteen years. You’re serious about wanting to go on it?”

“I more so want to see it. I read a book where all the horses come to life and help fight a supernatural war. It sounds so lame when I say it like that.”

I laugh. “I think I read that book. There’s a portal to the underworld in the lake?”

“Yes! I love that book. I read it three times and forced it on my friends.”

“I edited that book.”

Ana’s eyes go wide. “Seriously?”

“Yeah. It was one of the first projects I accepted.”

She moves closer and suddenly I’m all too aware of her hips brushing my thigh and the sweet floral scent of her shampoo as her hair sweeps against my chest. I steal a look down, admiring her large breasts for a second.

“I’m trying to decide if it’s a crazy coincidence or fate.”

“I don’t believe in fate.”

She takes her lip between her teeth, looking so fucking hot. I swallow hard. Stop it. I shift my gaze up, and someone barges to the counter, obviously drunk and stumbling. They crash right into Ana, who stumbles forward. I catch her, though in all honesty, I don’t think she’s going to fall.

Not to the floor at least.

My fingers press into the small of her back. She straightens up, inching closer. “It’s getting crowded in here. Wanna leave?”

“Sure.” It takes effort to keep my face neutral. “Where do you want to go?” Should I offer to take her back to her hotel? As in drop her off, not go in with her. Fuck. I want to go in with her.

“Still have that quarter?”

“I do.”

A beat passes before she laughs. “Well, get it! Or are you wanting me to dig it out of your pocket for you?”

I turn my head down and reach into my jean pocket. Having Ana’s hands anywhere near my dick would be fucking fantastic. She takes the quarter from my hand and holds it up.

“Heads, we go to Central Park and find that carousel.”

“And tails?”

She shrugs. “We go home. Call it an early night and go to bed like responsible adults.”

She flips it up catches it, and holds her hand out, smiling. “Let’s go catch a cab.”

* * *

“Maybe it’s the booze, but this is so good.” Ana breaks off a piece of seasoned and battered bread and dips it in cheese sauce. “It’s up there with one of the best things I’ve had in my mouth.”

“One of the best things?” I smirk, mind going to a dirty place. Again. It’s easy to do with her. I would never have done any of this if it weren’t for Ana and that damn coin that’s back in my pocket. I’m having a great night with her, though I feel like being next to her is dangerous. The more I get to know her, the more I see she’s unlike anyone I’ve ever met before. And that only adds to the insane attraction I’m fighting.

She laughs, shaking her head. “That came out wrong.” Turning, she flashes a grin. “Or maybe not.”

We’re walking along the lake in Central Park. The carousel was closed by the time we got there, but the night in the large park was still very much alive. We got margaritas from a rather questionable street vendor and moved onto some of the greasiest, deep-fried carbs the city has to offer.

We sit on a bench close enough that her leg is resting against mine. I look down at her exposed flesh, illuminated in a golden glow from a lamppost off the path, and see goosebumps.

“Are you cold?”

“Slightly,” she replies and tears off another piece of bread. I’m holding the plastic cup of cheese sauce and she twists her torso around to dip it in. “Want it? I think I’ve eaten most of this so far.”

“You have,” I say with a laugh. It’s nice being with a woman who isn’t afraid to eat. Heather used to get weird about it, only eating half her meals or not wanting to indulge at all in front of me because she thought it made her less attractive. The waste of food was more of a turnoff than anything, and I didn’t understand hiding what or when she ate.

I take the bread from Ana, pop it in my mouth, and hand her the sauce. I stand, remove my jacket, and wrap it around her shoulders.

“Thanks,” she says when I sit back down. Our eyes meet and for a moment we’re completely still. Maybe it’s the night, or the cheap tequila flooding my system, but I swear something passes between us. My heart hammers against my chest, threatening to burst free from its cage.

Ana takes in a breath and turns her eyes to the lake. “Do you ever feel like you’re just existing and not really living?”

Her words send a chill through me, tingling down my spine. “All the time.”

“Me too,” she whispers. “Life is too short to waste but I just…I just don’t know what else to do other than surviving from day to day. And I know how silly that sounds. My life isn’t bad.”

“You don’t have to have a hard life to feel like you’re going through the motions.” The words leave my mouth before I have a chance to think about it. It’s something I’ve struggled with as well. I have a good job. A nice house with more space than I’ll ever need. I’m healthy. Fit. Relatively young. Yet there’s a hole inside me, painfully empty. Guilt weighs heavy on me, not just from the shit I did in the past, but in wanting more. I have more than a lot of people. Shouldn’t that be enough?

“Right.” Her head falls on my shoulder and for half a second, I’m conflicted. Then I cave and slip my arm around her waist. She relaxes against me and for the first time in a long time, I don’t feel the wind howling through the cracks in my broken heart. My eyes fall shut, and I want this moment to last a lifetime.

“Hey, lovebirds!” someone trills in an overly cheerful voice.

Ana jumps and almost drops the remaining food. I tense, eyeballing the young woman in front of us. She’s wearing a bright pink dress and is holding a stack of paper.

“The park is going to be closing soon, and nobody wants to deal with those asshole rangers. You two look like you’re not ready to call it a night though, so you should come.”

I’m about to tell her to fuck off when Ana takes the paper from her, reading it curiously.

“The party’s just getting started,” the woman tells us. “Only twenty bucks to get in. Hope to see you there!” She walks off, attacking the next living soul she sees with the same line she just fed us.

“I think it’s a rave,” Ana says slowly, squinting in the dim light. “Do you want to go?”

“No. It’s a money-making scam put on by sketchy people.”

Ana considers my words but is still looking at the paper. “Flip for it?”

I raise an eyebrow, unable to keep the smile off my face. “Heads or tails?” I ask her, retrieving the quarter from my pocket.

“Tails.”

The quarter spins around and comes down in my hand. “Heads.”

“I feel slightly relieved,” she confesses and we both laugh.

“Me too.”

“Do they kick you out when the park closes? And how can a park this big close?”

“You’ll be asked to leave if you’re caught.” I check my watch. “We still have some time though.”

“Is it safe being out here at night?”

“I wouldn’t recommend you come out here alone, but together we’re fine.”

She nods and inhales deeply before getting up and tossing the food wrappers. “Thanks for hanging out with me tonight. I really didn’t want to be alone.”

“The feeling is mutual,” I say with a smile, noticing the darkness that takes over her face. It’s only there for a second, and my mind flashes back to when I first saw her tonight. Face pale, eyes wide…she looked terrified. The city can be overwhelming, especially for someone from a small town, but whatever upset her had to be more than that.

She comes back to the bench and sits close next to me. I hook my arm around her once more and she leans into me. Being close to her feels so natural, so comfortable. I should push her away, tell her we shouldn’t be doing this. Whatever it is. Yet I want more. I’m addicted without even having a taste.

It’s fucking weird.

“I think I’d like it here,” she says softly. “The city, I mean. Being out here makes me feel like I have room to breathe. I like the busy streets and the energy from the people, but this out here…it’s nice.”

“Yeah. Sometimes I forget this is here, that we have this escape from the business district and high rises. I don’t live far from the office, actually. I go longer than I should without seeing a bit of greenery.”

“I could see myself coming out here a lot. With a book or my computer to work. Well, when the weather is nice, that is.”

“Do you get snow in Kentucky?”

“Yes, but not a lot like you do up here. The thought of a big snowstorm excites me.”

Her breasts heaving as she talks is exciting me. “You say that now…”

“Oh, I know,” she says with a giggle. “I get sick of the few inches we get in the winter. I prefer warmer climates. I don’t like to wear clothes.”

“Come again?”

“I mean lots of clothes. Wait. That still doesn’t sound right. I mean layers. I don’t like feeling bunchy.” She tips her head up and smiles. “Does that make sense?”

“It does.” She turns her attention to the lake and gets up. The wind picks up, carrying on it the promise of rain. I look up at the dark sky above us and go over to Ana.

“Waiting for the portal to open?”

She nods. “Would you go in if it did?”

“Yes,” I say after a moment’s consideration. “I’ve always wanted to be a hero. In the epic fantasy sense,” I add quickly. “Would you?”

“Oh yes. No questions asked, which is probably a bad thing. Though I’m a bit out of shape to be fighting against fallen angels right now. But you…” She eyes me up and down. “You look like you can hold your own.”

Not knowing what to say to that, I just move my head in a nod. Working out is the only thing I do consistently besides work. Before Luke moved to Brooklyn, we went to the gym together. He’s a bit of a fitness junkie, and working out together pushed me. I’m in the best shape I’ve ever been.

“You don’t look so bad yourself.”

“I’ve been lazy lately. Okay. Always. I have a fast metabolism so I don’t put on weight, but I don’t like working out. Or sweating. Or feeling pain. I know I should work out for the health benefits. Maybe when I’m older. I got a few more years until I hit the big three-O anyway.”

“You distract the bad guys with your charm and good looks until I take them out.”

She nods, face serious. “That plan will work. And maybe I’ll realize I have magical powers that were under a binding spell while in the human world, but once I set foot inside the portal, the spell is broken.”

“You really are a writer,” I say with a laugh. “You should write that book.”

“Only if you edit it.”

“I think that can be arranged.”

Ana tosses her head back and closes her eyes. “The world is spinning, just a bit.” She holds out her arms and shakes her head. “Crap. That makes it worse.”

I take her hand and she curls her fingers around mine. We walk through the dark park, hardly seeing anyone. For a moment, it’s like we’re the only ones left on earth.

For a moment, I’d be okay with that.

“How do you remember your way around?” she asks. “I’m so lost right now.”

I chuckle. “I’ve lived here my whole life. This place can be confusing. It’s big and in the dark, it can be difficult to navigate. I got turned around several times before. I used to come here with friends when I was in high school.”

“You had a very different high school experience than me.”

“You said you’re from a rural town?”

“Yep. We have lots of cows around us.”

“I’ve never seen a cow in person.”

Ana turns to me, raising an eyebrow. “Is it sad that’s weird to me? Like how is that possible?” We laugh and I tighten my grip on her hand. “There’s a tradition on the last day of school where everyone either rides horses or a tractor to school.”

“Do you have horses?”

“I did. I showed at the county fair when I was a kid. It was the highlight of my summer.”

“And I thought you said you weren’t from a small town.”

“We have a couple thousand people there. It’s not that small. Though I suppose a few thousand compared to the eight million in the city is small potatoes.”

“Just slightly.” I smile at her and the wind picks up, cool air blasting us. Her hair floats around her face, and the hem of her dress rises up a few inches on her thighs. On an impulse I put my arm around her. She leans into my embrace, laughing as she tries to tame the wild locks that swirl in front of her. Thunder rumbles in the distance, and lightning flashes above us.

“Uh-oh,” Ana says, looking up.

“Uh-oh is right. We better speed it up.”

With my arm still tightly around her, we quicken our pace. But the storm is faster. A loud clap of thunder rings out, bringing on a shower of cold rain. I take Ana’s hand and we start to run, laughing and cursing the storm. When we finally emerge from Central Park, stopping alongside the road, it’s pouring.

“Should we get a cab?” Ana’s teeth chatter as she speaks. “Oh, there’s one!”

“It’s taken.”

“How can you tell?”

“The lights up top aren’t lit up. Another should come by soon,” I say, voice lost under another clap of thunder. But another taxi doesn’t come soon. The wind picks up and the rain comes down in buckets.

“I don’t live far.”

Ana wraps her arms around herself. “Okay.”

I hold out my hand and she takes it. My heart speeds up, and it’s not from the storm that’s raging above us.

It’s from something within.

We cross the street and race down a few blocks. By the time we reach my house, we’re soaked to the bone. My keys are in my jacket pocket, and my jacket is around Ana’s shoulders. She reaches inside and grabs them, and I unlock the door as fast as I can. I disarm the alarm system as soon as we’re in and the door’s closed, and then flick on the foyer light.

“Holy fuck,” Ana mumbles under her breath, looking around. The Victorian-era townhouse has an impressive two-story entryway. Hell, everything about this place is impressive, to be honest. Many of these old houses have been converted into high-end apartments, but this house has stayed in my family since my great-grandparents bought it back in the 1920’s. It’s stayed in our family ever since.

“Are you cold?” I don’t have to ask to know the answer to that. I’m fucking freezing.

“Yeah.” Ana looks down at her feet, shoes squishing as she takes a step, and then up at me. Suddenly, she bursts into laughter. “I’m drenched!”

I don’t know why it’s so funny, but it is. She peels off my jacket and I’m laughing along with her. I step out of my wet shoes and take my jacket from her. Our flesh touches, finding warmth through the cold, and the laughter stops as suddenly as it started. Our eyes meet and my breath hitches in my chest. Ana steps closer, and I’m aware of everything.

The outline of her pert nipples through her wet dress.

The way her dark hair hangs in clumps around her beautiful face.

Her full lips, slightly parted, and the warm breath that passes over them.

And the desperation to feel. To have someone’s arms go around you. To have their mouth on yours. Feel their heart beating right up against your chest. The warmth of their flesh on yours. Legs tangled around your waist.

Fuck.

I want to bury my cock deep inside her, to lose myself as we make love, not thinking about anything other than how fucking good it feels and how even better it is for her. I want to watch her come, feel her pussy contract around me as she squirms, panting my name and begging me not to stop.

The jacket drops to the floor.

Ana lunges forward. I catch her, arms going around her waist. I bring her to me, breasts crashing against my chest. She tips her head up and I watch her long lashes come together as she closes her eyes. Lips parting, I bring my mouth to hers.

It’s been years since I last kissed someone, and even longer since someone kissed me back with mirrored desire.

Knowing she wants this makes me want it even more.

In a fury of passion, I slide my hands down to her ass. My cock stiffens when I pull up her dress. My fingers swipe over her ass-cheeks, barely covered by lace panties. She groans and hikes up a leg, wrapping it around me.

With a guttural growl, I pick her up, pinning her against the door. She widens her legs, and my dick presses against her tender core. Ana grabs the hem of my wet shirt and peels it up and over my head, taking it off me one arm at a time. She throws it on the floor next to the jacket and runs her hands over the back of my head and through my hair.

I kiss her hard, and she kisses me back even harder, taking my lip between her teeth. She leans away ever so slightly, hands traveling down my chest, stopping at the waist of my jeans. I set her down, and her eyes meet mine as she pops the button and slowly pulls down the zipper.

I’ve never wanted someone more than I want Ana. In the back of my mind, I know I shouldn’t do this, which makes me want her even more.

She tugs my jeans down just an inch, and her fingers brush against my hard cock. The tip is sticking out the top of my boxers, and she gazes down, looking at it with lust in her eyes. I want to throw her down right here and now, pushing into her and unleashing the passion I feel inside.

Instead, I gently brush a wet strand of hair over her shoulder and run my fingers down her arm. Goosebumps break out over her flesh and I’m suddenly aware that she still has her wet clothes on. I bunch up the hem of her dress and slowly pull it up. She raises her arms above her head, allowing me to easily remove the garment and discard it on the floor with the others.

I take my time looking her over. She’s wearing a simple black bra. No frills or lace, no deep plunge or extreme pushup. And yet it’s so fucking sexy on her. Her intense beauty doesn’t need to be dressed up.

Wet hair falls in tangles around her face. A little pineapple charm hangs off a thin chain from her neck, resting above her large breasts. She’s thin but not bony, and I don’t think I’ll ever stop admiring her hourglass figure. She’s wearing hot pink lace panties, and I need her smooth legs wrapped around me. Now.

“You are so fucking beautiful,” I breathe, pulling her back to me. I need to kiss her. Need to feel her lips on mine. She falls forward, slipping her arms around my neck.

“Are you still cold?” I whisper between kisses.

“Yeah. But I’m warming up fast.”

I let out a groan in response and grab her around the waist. I pick her up and carry her into the living room, stopping by the fireplace. She sinks down onto the soft white rug, watching me start up the fire. With a gas starter, it only takes a minute. Firelight flickers throughout the room, casting shadows on Ana’s gorgeous face.

All it takes is one move and we’re right back where we left off. Ana moves into my lap, straddling me. We’re sitting in front of the fire, feeling the warmth of the flames already. I kiss her with everything I have and slide my hands up her back, fingers finding the smooth groove of her spine.

With one hand, I unhook her bra and yank the straps down her arms. All the years of pent-up emotion, the feelings I didn’t allow myself to have, the thoughts I pushed away all come crashing down on me. Everything is gone except for Ana, and I so desperately long to feel.

I move forward and lay Ana down, pinning myself on top of her. She widens her legs, bucking her hips to grind against mine. I slip my hand behind her head and take a tangle of her hair. I move my mouth to her neck, kissing. Sucking. Biting.

She softly moans, feebly attempting to take my pants off but not daring move away from my kiss. I reach down and grab her hands, then move them over her head. She pushes against me and I tighten my grip, making her squirm. The moment I let go of her wrists she moves her hands down, raking her nails up my back.

I kiss her lips. Her neck. Run my tongue along her collarbone. Ana’s breath quickens when my tongue circles her nipple. Then I quickly dive down and part her legs. Ana gasps, raising her head off the floor to look at me.

I take her ankle in my hand, lifting her leg up. Slowly, I run my fingers down it, feeling her tremble. I put my mouth to the tender flesh on the back of her knee and kiss my way to her inner thigh. Her muscles tense in anticipation. I put her leg over my shoulder and slip my fingers inside her panties, moving them to the side.

Ana’s hand lands on my head, pushing my face into her. She’s so wet and warm. So ready to be fucked. My tongue lashes against her clit and I relish in her taste, in bringing her pleasure.

“Holy shit, that feels good,” she moans, breath leaving in a huff. I work my tongue, bringing her closer to the edge. Both of her hands are in my hair. Gripping. Pulling. And then pushing me against her core, holding me there as if she’s afraid I’m going to stop.

I move my hand around her thigh, finger playing with the warm entrance to her pussy. The damn lace panties are in the way. Sitting up and removing them will take too long. I don’t think. I just grab them at the side and tear them in two.

“Fuck,” Ana gasps, flicking her eyes to me. “I fucking need you. Now. Make me come.”

Her words are almost enough to make me come without my dick even touching her. I slip a finger inside and put my mouth back between her legs. I find her g-spot and Ana’s legs tighten around me.

Painfully.

But I get off from the pain when she’s the one causing it.

She cries out as she climaxes, and the second the orgasm slows I move up, wiping my mouth on the back of my hand. I can’t wait any longer. I need to be inside her.

Ana pushes my boxers down and takes hold of my cock. It’s been so fucking long since I’ve been with anyone. I close my eyes and drop my head down, resting against her forehead. She pumps my shaft a few times, then widens her legs, welcoming me between.

I kiss her as I enter. It’s a snug fit, and it feels so fucking incredible. Slowly, she bends her legs up and hooks them around me. She’s still reeling from her orgasm so I take it slow, gently thrusting in and out until I’m sure she’s ready.

Because once I get started, I can’t hold back.

She starts to move her hips in sync with mine, mouth open and eyes shut. I push up, keeping my cock buried inside her, and grab her hips, moving into a new position. I’m on my knees and she’s in front of me, full breasts bouncing as I fuck her.

I’m so close to coming, and Ana is again too. I suddenly stop and train my eyes on Ana’s face. She blinks her eyes open, looking at me.

“Touch yourself,” I order and her eyes widen. Flickering firelight reflects off them like green glass. A beat passes and she doesn’t move, but then a tiny smile plays on her lips. Starting at her neck, Ana runs her fingers down her body, slowing at her breasts, and then plunging to her core. She slips two fingers around my cock that I’m holding still inside her, feeling every inch of me, and then touches her clit. I watch, waiting for her to get herself off.

Her breathing speeds. Head falls to the side. I can feel her muscles clench. She’s close.

“You’re so fucking hot,” I moan and start thrusting in and out again. It takes restraint to keep going until she comes again, and then I let loose, coming harder than I ever have before. I collapse on top of her, holding myself up just enough not to crush her. We’re both panting.

I put my lips to hers once more and then pull out, reaching over to an armchair behind us and pulling a folded blanket off the arm. I cover us both up and wrap my arms around Ana, finding solace in the quiet between us. The fire cracks and pops, and the rustic smell of the fire fills me with nostalgia. I don’t use the fireplace often, but there was almost always a fire going—even in warmer weather—when my grandparents lived here.

“That was fun,” Ana whispers a few minutes later.

“Yeah,” I agree. “It was.”

She rests her head on my arm and closes her eyes. There’s something different about her than anyone I’ve been with before. It’s almost like she’s made innocent by her vulnerabilities, though I can’t put my finger on exactly what they are. I like being with her when we’re not naked, and I really like fucking her. It’s been a long time since I’ve had sex, though I don’t remember a time when it ever felt that good. With anyone.

“Do you want to go to bed?” I ask her and run the palm of my hand along the curve of her hip. She’s so delicate.

“Yes,” she replies sleepily. “Sleeping sounds nice right now.”

I wrap the blanket around her and lift her up. Ana clings to me, arms tight around my shoulders. I take her upstairs and into my bedroom, setting her down on the king-sized bed, and then turn on a lamp on my nightstand. Ana takes a moment to look around. The room is large, with a fireplace across from the bed, a sitting area, and an attached bathroom.

I hired someone to decorate the house professionally. I spend a lot of time in here so I wanted it to be as nice as possible, and I have to say it turned out great. Way fucking better than I could have done myself.

Ana uses the bathroom and I go downstairs, locking up and putting out the fire. Still naked, we fall into bed together. Lightning flashes in the distance as the storm begins to pass. Rain gently hits the window. I pull Ana close and close my eyes.

For the first time in years, I am happy.