Chapter Twenty – As Though the Devil Was Behind
As the sunlight danced over her closed lids, Beth’s mind slowly abandoned the sweet slumber that had held her wrapped in a pleasant cocoon all night. With her eyes still closed, she rolled onto her side and reached out an arm…only to find the other side of the bed empty.
Instantly, her eyes flew open and she sat up, finding not only the bed empty, but the rest of her chamber as well.
Drawing in a deep breath, Beth pressed her lips together as a very unlady-like curse threatened to jump from her lips. Did her husband sneak out of her room in the middle of the night?
Shaking her head, she frowned, fighting down a wave of disappointment. After last night, she had hoped that he would act differently around her. Had she not reached him with her words? Had her touch meant nothing to him?
Quickly, anger surged up, pushing aside any sense of disappointment and giving fire to her limbs.
Determined not to give up, Beth rang for her maid and then got dressed, marvelling at the new experience of having people wait on her. While a part of her delighted in the fact that it was no longer her responsibility to see that the work was done, it also felt odd to have someone else do things for her which she could very well do herself.
Fortunately, her maid was a young woman named Mary, with a kind face and a rather determined and proud look in her eyes, whose sure hands had Beth standing before a mirror in no time, a beautiful dress covering her body and her hair arranged in the latest fashion. “There. You look lovely, my lady.”
As Beth descended the large staircase from the upper floor, she wondered what her life would be like today if she had grown up like this. What if her mother had never left her father? Would she now be married to Tristan? Or would she be forced to marry an old man like Lord Arlton?
Shaking off the image of her half-sister’s misery, Beth proceeded toward the breakfast parlour, determined not to let her husband slip through her fingers. Clearly, he thought to evade her, and although his reaction the previous night spoke volumes about his true feelings toward her, he was not yet ready to admit to them in the light of day.
But he would be! Grinning, Beth took a deep breath. She would make certain of that!
As she approached, the footmen opened the door, and she stepped into the breakfast parlour. Barely looking up from the morning paper, her husband sat at the head of the table, a cup of tea in his right hand. “Good morning, my lady.”
Seeing the tension that had come to his face upon her arrival, Beth could not help but smile. Would he truly insist on acting so childish? Pretending that they were mere strangers who happened to live in the same house?
Well, if he would, then she would equally insist on reminding him that she was not a stranger, but his wife!
“Good morning, my dear,” she said with a large smile on her face, “did you sleep well? I admit I was fairly exhausted.”
His cup froze in mid-air halfway to his mouth. Still staring at his paper, he swallowed before his gaze shifted to her, a look of incredulity in his eyes.
Meeting his gaze, Beth gave him a most dazzling smile as she casually dropped a lump of sugar into her tea. “Is something wrong? You seem a little pale. Did you not get enough sleep last night?”
Again, Tristan swallowed. “I slept quite well,” he croaked, then cleared his throat as his eyes shifted back to the paper before him. “I hope you are happy with the maid that was assigned to you. Should you need further help packing your belongings, please do not hesitate to speak to Mrs. Benton, the housekeeper.”
Gritting her teeth, Beth felt her eyes narrow. “I’m sorry, my dear,” she forced out with feigned cordiality, “however, you must have misunderstood me. I have no intention of spending the remainder of the season at your country estate.” Whatever its name is!
Slowly, he lifted his eyes to hers. Then his mouth opened…and closed…and opened again. “I’m afraid I must insi−”
“Nonsense,” Beth interrupted, noticing her husband’s subtle−and rather uncomfortable−glances toward the footmen who stood nearby. “I very much enjoy my stay here in London, and besides, a wife belongs by her husband’s side.” A mischievous idea came to mind, and Beth acted on it without delay. “Especially after the previous night, I am most unwilling to be parted from you.”
With eyes going wide, her husband turned rather red in the face before he set down his cup and rose from his chair. “If you’ll excuse me, my lady, but I have…rather urgent business to attend to.” Then he fled the room as though the devil was behind him, Beth thought, which was a rather fitting comparison as she immediately set off in pursuit, a devilish smile on her face.
Marriage proved to be quite an amusing institution!
Following on her husband’s heels, Beth saw him vanish through a door at the end of the corridor. Without bothering to knock, she followed him inside the room, closing the door behind her as her husband turned to her with a wide-eyed stare.
“What are you doing here?” he demanded, stepping behind the desk in the centre of his study as though intending to use it as a shield.
Beth chuckled, “Tristan, do you truly insist on playing these games?”
“Games?”
“Yes, games,” Beth repeated, slowly stepping up to the desk between them. “Can we not speak like reasonable adults? Or do you truly insist on pretending that this is a marriage of convenience?”
Shaking his head, her husband closed his eyes for a moment, then met her gaze. “Last night, I informed you that I wanted you to travel to Hampton Hall for I do not wish to live in the same house with you…at least not at present. Not after the way our marriage began.”
Beth took a deep breath, determined not to be discouraged by his words. Noting the slight tremble in his voice, she met his eyes without flinching, a tempting smile on her face. “I do remember,” she whispered. “However, I also remember that you acted as though you’d changed your mind.”
Instantly, his gaze dropped from hers, and he began to shuffle through some papers on his desk. “I…eh…I apologise for my misconduct, my lady,” he stammered, unable to meet her eyes. “I assure you I had no intention of−”
“There was no misconduct,” Beth interrupted, slowly stepping around the desk.
Seeing her advance, his eyes widened and his jaw clenched as he took a step backward.
“Tristan, why are you doing this?” Beth asked, staring at him dumbfounded. “Why are you so intent on disliking me?”
“I am not,” he protested, his hands balling into fists at his sides as he clearly fought the urge to retreat with each step she took towards him. “I already told you−”
“I know what you told me,” Beth interrupted yet again, unable to listen to the excuses he tried to shield himself with, “and I know what I felt last night when you touched me.” He swallowed. “You can try to pretend that you do not care for me all you want, but I assure you it will not be easy, for it is fairly obvious that your heart disagrees.” Holding his gaze, Beth came to stand before him. “I am aware that we barely know each other, but you cannot deny that from the moment our eyes met across the room, there’s been… something between us. I don’t know what it is, but I know what it means.”
For a long moment, he held her gaze, the muscles in his jaw working as his mind and heart battled for supremacy. “Do tell.”
As her heart hammered in her chest, Beth smiled. “It means that we didn’t make a mistake getting married.”
He scoffed and tried to step away.
Unwilling to allow him to escape, Beth reached for his arm. “Do not pretend that you didn’t feel it. I know your pride is hurt because of the circumstances of our marriage.” He opened his mouth in protest. “Do not deny it. Anyone would be.” His mouth closed, and a slight frown drew down his brows as he regarded her more closely. “I know you have a lot of questions,” Beth continued, “and I suppose you need to hear the answers more than once to believe them.” She swallowed, then raised her chin and looked at him openly. “I never had any intention of trapping you into marriage. What endeared you to me at the ball was neither your title nor your fortune−especially since I had no idea who you were−but instead, the look of longing in your eyes as they met mine. It touched me in a way I…I can’t even begin to put into words how it made me feel.”
His gaze held hers, and she read open curiosity where before there had only been doubt. Still, he was not convinced, and Beth realised that the depth of his insecurities would not easily be overcome. She would have to be watchful and persistent. She would have to be honest and patient. And above all, she would have to make him believe that he was worthy of love.
Reaching for his hands, Beth nodded, hoping he would not withdraw from her. “I promise that I shall never lie to you. If you believe nothing else, believe that.”
He drew in a deep breath, and his fingers curled around hers, their pressure on her skin slowly increasing.
Glancing at their linked hands, Beth looked up at him once again, a delighted smile coming to her lips. “Will you promise the same?”
He nodded.
“Good.” She drew in a deep breath, her eyes trained on his face, watchful of his reaction. “Then tell me honestly: did you enjoy our wedding night?”
Instantly, he tensed, and his eyes widened slightly. “You’re fairly outspoken.”
Beth nodded. “I never claimed not to be.”
“You did not,” he confirmed as his chest rose and fell with each slow breath, and his eyes burned into hers the same way they had the night before. His hands tightened on hers, and she saw the pulse in his neck hammer against the tightness of his collar.
“Thank you for being honest,” she whispered, biting her lower lip as a blissful smile claimed her face.
A frown drew down his brows. “What do you mean? I did not say anything.”
“You did not,” she confirmed, and her hands pulled his forward. Then she stepped into his embrace and lifted her face to meet his. “But I understood your answer loud and clear.”
Glancing at her lips only moments away from his own, he drew in a deep breath, realisation coming to his eyes, and his cheeks grew warm with embarrassment.
“Do you remember what else I told you at the ball?” she whispered. “No one likes to be transparent, and I’m glad to see that I’m not the only one who feels that way. It makes one vulnerable, and I can only hope that I can trust you with my heart for it is the only one I have.” Holding his gaze, Beth stepped back, her hands, though, held on to his. “Promise me you’ll try to look at me with the same eyes as you did the night of the masked ball.”
He swallowed, then almost imperceptibly nodded his head.
“Thank you.” Gently squeezing his hands, Beth stepped back and then released his, noting reluctance in his muscles as he allowed them to go free. “I shall be patient,” she added, her lips curling into a mischievous smile, “but I will not leave for I am certain that if I did, we would both come to regret it.”