Chapter 21
Valentine
Past
“Arsen is gone. You need to deal with that and move on.” My father snapped. I felt like hanging up on him right then, but of course I didn't. I stood on the balcony of my condo that overlooked the beach. It had been a few years since that perfect night where we had our own prom, but I still remembered every moment.
I missed Arsen every day. Why did he abandon me?
“Stop being so fickle, you need to start dating or the media will start to make assumptions.” I wish my father found me as many auditions as he did dates. Every time it was the same thing. Handsome, yet tame, upcoming celebrities, carefully picked for what they brought to the 'Dawson' brand.
I was so sick of it.
“I need to focus on my career right now.” That was always my go to excuse. It was also true, acting was the only thing that distracted me from Arsen. When I was acting I could become someone else, someone less broken inside.
“That's all well and good, but how you arrive is just as important as actually arriving. Remember that. Another thing, stop pursuing theater roles. We're a screen family, not a stage family.”
“But I like those roles. They're much more challenging for me than a Rom Com.” I especially loved the beauty, elegance and depth of Shakespeare. The darkness of his characters really called to me.
“Exactly. Valentine, that world is far more intricate than film. It will look horrible for us if you crack under that pressure. I have a limited reach there, and won't be able to make excuses for you. So get that silly notion right out of your head.”
As supportive as always. Thanks, dad.
“Alright.” I sighed. There was never any arguing with him, especially after the last time I disobeyed him to run off with Arsen. Nearly a full year passed, before he even let me go to any auditions. No Arsen, no acting and no real friends, that was the darkest time in my life.
My father was this domineering shadow that loomed over every decision I made, or had made for me. It made me miss Arsen that much more. I wish I remembered the exact words he used when he told my father off. That one night, I truly felt alive, like a bird released from a cage.
“That's a good girl.” My father talked at me until he was finished, then hung up. That's how most of these conversations went. I had grown so used to it, that it barely bothered me anymore.
All I wanted to do was watch the waves crash and drink champagne. Or rather, sparkling apple cider. The memory of the look on Arsen's face when he found out that it was nonalcoholic, made me smile. Then it made me break down into tears.
Present
“Your lunatic brother is banned from all production sets for the duration of filming!” Allen, the director was furious. He nervously glanced around. “He's not still here, is he?
“No, I asked him to leave.” I'd spent so much time wishing for Arsen to come back and now I’ve asked him to leave...
It only took a few minutes after Phillip was found by a production assistant for everything to go nuclear in the building. I knew that the producers and maybe even the police would be involved when Phillip recovered his faculties. It's why I didn't want Arsen to be on set, but I hated myself for telling him to leave. All he'd done was protect me. I felt horrible.
“Good!” Allen raised his voice, now that there was no fear of repercussion. “That man is neanderthal, what he did to poor Phillip!”
“Phillip,” is a spoiled, entitled child! I caught myself, swallowed my opinions and then continued. “Phillip will he be alright, he—”
“He's resting right now. His people are deciding what he feels fit for, but the filming day is ruined!” Allen became an animated parody of himself, his face reddened and his fists shook. “I knew Arsen was trouble the second I saw him!”
“With all due respect, Mr. Woodrow.” Arsen shouldn't have hit Phillip, but I refused to listen to him be insulted for coming to my aid. “Phillip crossed the line. He was aggressive and lewd and wouldn't keep his hands off me, despite me telling him several—”
“And we're lucky to have him! He's the most sought after young actor in the world right now. Any film he's in gets asses into seats, not to mention the academy nominations.” Allen talked down to me, shaking his head. I was getting real tired of being interrupted. “Let him do whatever he wants.”
“Excuse me?” I eyed the man.
“Valentine, you're a good actor.” Allen put a hand on my shoulder. It was probably supposed to be some sort of parental gesture, but it came off as incredibly creepy. “But that's not why you're here. You're here because Phillip wanted you. I suggest you start thinking about ways to make it up to him, if you want to stay on this project.”
There it was, all laid out. I was basically brought in to be a booty call for the lead actor. Arsen was right, they didn't value me at all. Was this really what I wanted, to be surrounded by sociopaths?
I felt so foolish. A good man had put a bad man down and I punished him for it. I was no better than them. I sent away the only man that really cared about me. I looked at the fake, practiced sympathy on Allen's face, and came to a long overdue realization.
Phillip was only a few years older than I was. Our fathers were both famous actors, we had a very similar background in most regards. It chilled me to think that if I didn't have Arsen keeping me grounded when I was younger, I might have grown up to be just like Phillip.
My time with Arsen in the past few months alone changed me, he'd reminded me who I really was and who I wanted to be. I had lost that for so long... I was searching for love and acknowledgment in all the wrong places.
I glanced at all the people still left on set, the ones that thought it was my fault for what happened to Phillip. I didn't need their respect, and I didn't want them as my peers.
“I know of one way to make it up to him,” I slapped the old man's hand from my shoulder. “How about I don't let the media know how small his dick is.” Allen's widening eyes looked gigantic behind his thick glasses. “Now if you'll excuse me, there is one man I need to go apologize to.”
I walked away from the stunned old man.
“Valentine, if you leave now—” The blustered director started.
“I quit, Allen.” It felt really good to interrupt a man like Allen Woodrow. Then I realized I had one last thing to say. “Also, go fuck yourself.”
Never in my life had I stood taller than when I walked out of that building. Allen and Phillip, just like my own father, were very powerful men in the industry. I'd probably never work in LA again, but that was fine. My naïve dream was over. That wasn't who I really was anyways, it's just a shame it took me so long to finally see that.
I raced back to our apartment, desperately needing to see Arsen. Romeo greeted me at the door, tail wagging as always. I called out Arsen's name and checked the apartment, but he wasn't there.
I held off on calling his phone until now, because I was hoping to apologize to him in person. Arsen's phone went right to voice mail, it was off. A pit formed in my stomach, I was starting to get really worried. He did say he wouldn't be there when I got back.
My heart began to race, what if he really was gone? Just like before. I didn't know if I could handle that again. I forced myself to push past the fear and the pain. We were adults now, we could figure this out.
I fell into the couch, trying to think of where he could have gone. Arsen didn't speak much of his time away these past few years, only that he was paid to fight. From the scars all over his body, I'd say that he got paid a lot. My throat went dry at the thought.
Did Arsen go off to fight?
Romeo jumped onto my lap. “O Romeo, Romeo,” I scratched both sides of the dog's face just how he liked it, his back leg started kicking. I was so hesitant about living with a dog at first, but now I couldn't imagine not coming home to our fluffy, pet monster. “Wherefore art thou, Arsen, boy? Huh?” I sighed. “You'd tell me if you could, wouldn't you?”
Romeo jumped off when I got up to grab some water for the desert in my throat. It was then that I noticed the note Arsen had written me. I was hoping that it was a message letting me know where he was, but it wasn't. It was just extensive instructions for Romeo. They were what you'd leave someone, if you weren’t ever coming back.
Now I was really nervous.
There were some indents in the pad of paper that the note came from. I figured Arsen wrote the note on that then tore it off, but when I looked a little closer the lines didn't match up. I grabbed a pencil from a nearby drawer and lightly colored in the small square of paper. In the negative I saw the words 'glass fight' and then an address.
What the hell was a glass fight?
I called my friend, Jeter, right away. Of course he wouldn't know anything about underground fighting, but he knew someone that did. After only a little delay, Jeter gave me the number of the bartender from the party that had recognized Arsen.
“A glass fight?” The bartender asked, when I managed to get him on the line. “Oh hell yeah, those are fucking crazy! The fighter's fists are wrapped in bandages, dipped in tar and then covered in broken glass. I'm telling you, it is insane.”
“Jesus...” I was horrified. This was what Arsen was going to do? How could he be that stupid! “That's barbaric, who would want to even see that?”
“You're fucking with me, right? Old, bored, rich guys 'love' that shit. They think it's like the gladiator times, or some shit. A good fight to the death never goes out of style.”
No, I guess not.
I thanked the bartender, then rushed out the door. If I called the police, then they would definitely arrest Arsen for participating. I had no idea what to do. I just knew I had to get there.
I couldn't lose him again.