Chapter Twenty
Charlie and Lila both fell into silence as they got ready for the day, until Lila went to meet Lucas for lunch and then it was Charlie, alone in an empty house. He wanted to drive her into town, but showing up together would only make things worse. But how much worse could it be?
He would head into Southern Dive to open the shop, so he showered, then put on his clothes, made coffee, all of the tasks mindlessly done because his thoughts were all on what Lucas had said . . . and how right he had been. His thoughts drifted back to their upbringings and how different they had been. Charlie’s family wasn’t poor by any stretch of the imagination, but they weren’t wealthy either. They weren’t educated. Everyone in Lucas and Lila’s family graduated from college, Lucas while serving. And Lila was a doctor. Charlie might run a successful business now, and certainly the farm was doing well, but he was as blue collar as a Southern man could be. Lila was anything but blue collar.
And then there was the issue of the attacker getting into Lila’s apartment, and while Charlie felt he’d watched out for Lila maybe he was wrong. Maybe he should have done more. What if Lila had been there when the attacker was there? Anything could have happened and then—
No, he wouldn’t let himself go down that road. She was safe. But Charlie had allowed his feelings for her to overcome his logic, and maybe that slip was why he missed the attacker coming to Crestler’s Key, photographing them together, and then getting into her apartment.
Arriving at Southern Dive, he unlocked the door, turned off the alarm, and turned on the lights, each step dragging him deeper into the black hole that was taking over his head and heart. He woke his laptop and went to work checking online orders. The numbers of questions about T-shirt designs and custom requests were increasing to the point now that Charlie had an autoreply setup that announced the T-shirt line was in development, to stay tuned for news. But that reply had been in place for three months now, and he was no closer to starting the T-shirt line. The process, which he’d discussed briefly with his lawyer, involved patents, which took time to approve, then finding a good screen printer to produce the shirts, then packaging and pricing, and the list went on forever.
Still, as he stared at the ten orders, all of them inquiring about the shirts, all since yesterday, he wondered if maybe . . . But then he thought of who he was, his experience. What business did he have trying to create a business from the ground up all on his own? Southern Dive had been different. He had his brothers there to help.
Frustrated, he closed the laptop and was preparing to go through the shop when a soft knock at the main door pulled his attention away. Immediately, his eyes locked on Lila’s through the glass, and he started over, every step like his shoes were filled with lead. Because he knew where this was going, what he had to do.
“Hey,” she said, as he unlocked the door, and then she wrapped her arms around his neck, but he couldn’t bring himself to hug her back. That would only make this harder. She pulled away, her face pinched in concern. “Are you okay?”
“Any news on the attacker?” he asked, hoping to change the subject.
“No, nothing new. They want me to be watched, but Lucas said he would handle it. You know how he is.”
Overprotective, Charlie wanted to say, but then wasn’t he overprotective, too? Weren’t we all when it came to the ones we loved?
“Yeah, I do. How did lunch go?”
She sighed heavily. “As good as expected. He doesn’t understand.”
“Right.” Charlie turned away and went back to the T-shirt wall, where he’d decided to pull every stack off and reorganize them. Because apparently he wanted to torture himself.
“What are you doing?” Lila asked.
“Organizing the shelf.”
“No. What are you doing?”
Unable to avoid it any longer he spun to face her, his frustration taking over logical thought. “I don’t know what the hell I’m doing! I want to be with you. I’ve wanted it for as long as I can remember. But every single thing Lucas said was right. I’m not . . . you’re . . . I just don’t know how this can work. And now I’ve ruined the only real friendship I have.”
Lila nodded slowly, her face etched in anger, and Charlie wanted to go to her, to apologize, take it all back. But he couldn’t, because deep down he knew this was the right thing.
“You know, when you stood up to him at your house, I thought ‘Finally! Finally, Charlie is done being in Lucas’s shadow and will put my arrogant, thinks-he-can-do-no-wrong brother in his place.’ But clearly not. Didn’t it ever occur to you that you are everything I ever wanted, too? That I’m proud of you? That everything you touch takes off and flies? You don’t need a degree to be intelligent and driven. Those things are already inside of you, and that’s why if you decide to create your T-shirt line, I know it’s going to blow up, too. And not because Zac helps you or Brady pushes it or all those followers you have on social media tell everyone they know. It’s because of you. Because you are amazing.” Her lip trembled and she dropped her gaze to the hardwood floors, and Charlie took a step toward her. “But I can’t make you want to fight for me. I can’t make you put me first. I can’t . . .” Her voice shook.
Charlie wished she would deck him right now, because he deserved it. Everything she was saying was right, but he couldn’t make sense of this in his head. Losing someone you care about to gain someone else. Nothing about this was right.
Finally, she focused on him again, her eyes red, but she was holding back her tears. “I’m not a girl anymore. I’m a woman, and love is only a small part of a relationship. You need to trust each other and know the other person isn’t going to back out on you when things get tough. And I just don’t . . . I’m not sure I can say that about you. So, I’ll make this easy for you. Good-bye, Charlie.”
She turned around and walked out the door, her head down as she started down the sidewalk, and every fiber in Charlie’s body ached to go after her. To beg and plead and say she was right, he was an idiot. But he couldn’t. So instead, he turned back to his shelf, the pile of shirts there, and grabbed the lot of them and threw them back onto the shelf. Then he grabbed his keys, shut out the lights, and walked out—alone.
* * *
The tears refused to stop, despite all Lila’s efforts to tell them to stop. It was like she’d been promised the future she wanted, got a small peek into what it would look like, and then she woke from the dream only to realize it had never been a possibility in the first place. Her heart hurt, and all she wanted to do was go back to Southern Dive and ask him to try, to talk to Lucas with her. And then talk to Lucas again, and again, until he—
Oh my God. What was she thinking? Lucas was her brother, not her father, and even then, she was a twenty-eight-year-old woman. What right did anyone have to involve themselves in her love life? They didn’t! He didn’t!
So with renewed anger, Lila turned her car around and sped toward her brother’s house, each second making her madder and madder until she feared her brother might not survive this visit. She slammed her Pilot into park in his driveway. Immediately, he opened his screen door, was already through it, asking what was wrong, when she flew out of her car, stomping and ready to push him to the ground, like when they were kids and he’d rip the head off one of her Barbie dolls.
“I am not a little girl anymore.”
His face switched from worry to confusion. “I know that.”
“Do you? Because this is all your fault. You treat me like a freaking porcelain doll, always have, and then the attack happened, and it’s a thousand times worse. Charlie is your best friend. The best man you know, and you treated him like he was nothing. All for what? Because I fell for him? News flash, I fell for him a long time ago, and you had no right getting involved. It’s my life, mine. My decision.”
Lucas took a step back. “I just want what’s best for you.”
“What’s best for me is Charlie.”
He stared at her. “I know him, know the way he thinks. You should hear the way he talks about women.”
Lila crossed her arms and glared at her brother. “Really, when? As an adult?”
“Well . . .”
“Because it sounds like you’re talking about a sixteen-year-old boy, with more hormones than brains. But that isn’t Charlie, and you know it. He’s not a boy now. He’s a man. A good man. A great man, in fact, and I don’t think he would say anything bad about anybody. That’s not who he is. And he’s smart, ridiculously smart. He’s built multiple businesses now, all on his own, and he’s about to launch a third that’s probably going to make him wealthier than either of us have a chance of being. And you know what? He won’t even care. It won’t change him, because he’s that good of a person. You’ve called him your best friend for all these years, but you’re not a friend. A real friend doesn’t treat someone this way.” She started for her car, then paused and turned back. “You should be ashamed of yourself. I am.”
And then she got back into her car, shut the door, and put the car in reverse. It took all of two seconds for her phone to ring, and for her to peer down and see Lucas’s name. Her gaze lifted to find him still standing in the driveway, his hands lifted in surrender.
She put the car in park again and got out. “What now?”
“You’re right,” he said, shaking his head. “The things I see, the things I do . . . I just, it has changed me. Continues to change me. I worry about you. You’re my little sister. But you’re right. I’m not being fair, and Charlie . . .” He trailed off, and Lila took a step toward him, her arms crossed. But they were family. You didn’t turn your back on family. You didn’t run. You yelled and screamed, threw things if you must, but then you forgave each other.
“Don’t tell me. Tell him. Because he’ll never admit it, but he’s hurting right now, and it’s your fault.”
Lucas looked uncomfortable, and Lila almost laughed. “I’m not asking you guys to go cry it out. Just call him or go see him. Say you’re sorry.”
“And what will you do? Wyatt is out there somewhere. You can’t go back to your apartment. Can you just stay here? Please. I’ll go see Charlie, bring him back with me.”
Lila’s eyes found the grass. “Actually, I think that’s over now.”
“Over what I said? Hell no. I’m going to talk to him.”
“I don’t think it’ll matter. Honestly, I respect that he wants to do the right thing by you, but I want a man who would never push me away, no matter what. No matter who was between us.”
Lucas put an arm around her and pulled her close. “Go on in, make yourself at home, and I’ll be back in an hour. With Charlie.”
She opened her mouth to argue, when Lucas said, “Trust me.”