Chapter 14
I was thankful to be a morning person as I followed Travis downstairs at the ass crack of dawn the next day.
He offered me a grin, eyes skimming over my workout gear as he let Able out back to do his business. “You’re really dedicated to this bet, huh?”
I looked at him as though he were daft. “Of course. A bet’s a bet. You should have seen the things I had to do growing up whenever I lost a bet with my brother. If Theo says he’s not sore this morning, then I’ll do PT with you guys.”
He shook his head, chuckling as Able came bounding back inside.
“Want a shake?” he offered as he went into the kitchen to whip up whatever concoction it was he drank on a daily basis.
I grimaced, grabbing a banana. “While I so appreciate what that sludge does for your muscles, I’m good, thanks.”
With a wink, he turned his attention to the blender.
We were out the door just as the sun was tinting the sky pink. I had my school clothes with me, planning to change at headquarters.
“Normal day for you?” he asked as he walked me to my car. We’d drive separately so I could head to work afterwards.
I nodded. “Yep. When I get finished up at school, I’ll head over to the studio. I have three classes, probably won’t be home until after dinner.”
He looked down at me. “I have to work late tonight anyway, so that works.”
I nodded agreeably, liking that we could be independent but come together so naturally at the same time.
When we walked into headquarters we headed straight for the gym, only stopping to deposit our bags at Travis’s desk. We found Sid and Declan already warming up for whatever torture I was about to be put through.
They both raised a brow when they saw me. “You’re really going to do PT with us?” Declan chuckled.
I narrowed my gaze. “What, you think I can’t keep up?”
“No, it’s not that.” He shook his head, his eyes dancing with mirth. “More that I doubt Theo would hold up his end of the bet.”
“Well, I don’t back out of a bet.” I sniffed indignantly.
“Hey, you get full credit.” Dec threw his hands up in surrender.
The distant sound of the elevator heralded Theo’s arrival. “Fuck, you guys, I’m so—”
His complaint cut off immediately when he spotted me. I raised a brow. “You’re so…,” I prompted.
“Tired,” he grumbled petulantly.
“Sure you are,” I muttered, rolling my eyes.
Travis shot Theo an impatient look before his gaze turned to me. “You still want to do PT, babe? No pressure.”
I shrugged. “Sure, I’m here. Let’s do it.”
Within five minutes I knew why all the guys had washboard abs. After a warm-up, we started with sets of push-ups and sit-ups, doing more reps than I’d ever done in my life. I didn’t do nearly as many as the guys, but managed to pull off what I felt was a respectable amount.
Then we moved to interval training, during which my heart threatened to pound right out of my chest.
“You all right, Armstrong?” Travis taunted. He’d been especially hard on Theo since the workout had started. “You seem a little more winded than normal.”
“I’m fine,” Theo gritted out as he finished another burpee.
Sweat was pooling off me by the time we headed out for a run. “You’re doing so well, babe,” Travis complimented as we ran side by side past headquarters and out onto the street.
“Thanks.” I panted. It definitely wasn’t something I wanted to do again anytime soon, but I was proud I was able to at least keep up, for the most part. The fact that Travis did a workout like this six days a week was mind-boggling.
By the time we arrived back at Talon after completing two miles that felt like a marathon, I was ready to collapse onto the ground in a pile of putty. But it was Theo who actually did.
“Fine,” he groaned from his place on the ground. “I admit it. I’m fucking sore.”
I grinned down at him, hands on my hips. “Of course you admit this after I just finished your torturous workout,” I remarked dryly. “Technically, you reneged on the bet. I’d say that adds another week of my classes to your schedule.”
“I agree,” Travis agreed immediately.
“Fuck all of you,” Theo grumbled as Declan smacked him with a towel.
Despite the early hour, and putting myself through hell for a bet I hadn’t actually lost in the first place, I’d had fun. With each day that passed I felt more a part of Travis’s world, and I found that I really liked it there. So much so, I wasn’t sure I’d ever want to leave.
****
I arrived at Travis’s that evening ready to collapse into bed. After the morning I’d had, then working at the preschool and teaching three yoga classes, I was more than ready for some rest. Since Trav was working late, I headed straight upstairs when I got home, Able and Buster hot on my heels.
After a quick shower and changing into my coziest pajamas, I was ready to find something on Netflix. My phone pinged with a text from Danny just as I was perusing my options.
How’s it going?
Good. Feeling pretty tired. Ready for a boring night. :)
Better not tell Travis his speech is boring. LOL.
Her response had my brow pinching in confusion.
Speech?
Yeah, his speech at the conference tonight. I never asked you what you ended up wearing!
I stared at the words in disbelief, my heart hammering painfully in my chest. Travis hadn’t said a word to me about an event tonight.
I’m at his house. He didn’t mention it.
I watched the bubbles linger again and again, indicating she was typing and then most likely erasing, unsure what to say. Finally, my phone rang, her name flashing on my screen. I debated not answering—I felt so humiliated—but decided to face it head-on.
“Hey.”
“Hey.” Her greeting was followed by a worried sigh. “I’m so sorry. I feel awful. I just assumed you were with him.”
“Nope,” I murmured. “He didn’t mention anything about it.”
“Shit.” She sighed. “Well, I’m sure he had a good reason.”
I wasn’t so sure I bought that, and from the tone of her voice I could tell she wasn’t sure either.
“So, what is the event?” I asked, forcing myself to keep my tone light.
“It’s a security conference—Travis is the keynote speaker. Then there’s a dinner afterwards.”
“Ah,” I replied, tears pricking the backs of my eyes. I tried to say more, but I was too choked up.
“Are you okay? Want me to come over?” she asked worriedly.
A sniffle broke free, and I swallowed hard. “No, I’m okay,” I lied as I hoisted my tired body out of bed. There was no way I was staying there after he’d blatantly lied about where he’d be tonight. That, compounded by the fact that clearly he didn’t want me on his arm, had me realizing with crushing force that we were likely over.
I wouldn’t be with someone who wanted to hide me away—who wasn’t proud of me. Most of all, I wouldn’t be with someone who lied to me.
“Em,” she murmured.
“I’m gonna get out of here.” I cut her off as I threw my things in a duffel bag.
“Get out of there? What do you mean?” she said in a rush. “Em, I’m sure he had a good reason. He adores you,” she added hurriedly.
“I’ll be fine, I’ll check in with you tomorrow,” I replied, knowing I sounded curt, but I didn’t have time to listen to her trying to talk me out of this.
“But E—”
I hung up, wincing at how unlike me the move was, but I just didn’t have the time to worry about it at the moment. Instead, I gathered up what I could and shoved a very unhappy Buster in his cat cage. Able followed as I took one last look at Travis’s place—a house I could never imagine would feel like a home.
My phone rang half a dozen times and pinged with multiple texts as I made my way out to my car.
I had very few options, and wished like hell I’d pressed Travis on what the latest was with Roy. In the end, I made what was likely not the smartest decision, but in my state, I felt strongly that there was really only one option.
I needed home. My home.
I turned my phone off, tired of the incessant beeping, and blinked back tears as I guided my car toward my neighborhood. I kept hearing Travis’s voice in my head saying, “I’ll check in with you later, babe. Have to work late tonight.”
The lie kept rolling through my brain on a painful loop.
When I pulled up to the curb, May’s house was dark. I wished fervently for my friend and hoped wherever she was, that she was having the time of her life.
I took a deep breath, bracing myself for the walk back to my cottage. Roy had threatened me if I talked to the police, but I hadn’t. That combined with the fact that Travis had relaxed some about me going out alone, had me telling myself this wasn’t the stupidest thing I’d ever done.
Hopefully.
I just couldn’t stand the thought of facing Danny or Sam, of seeing the pity in their eyes.
I needed to be alone.
I unlocked the door, the smell of home wafting into my nostrils. I turned on a few lights and let Buster out of his cage. I was so exhausted I doubted I’d have trouble sleeping, despite the night’s events.
I locked the door and headed for my bedroom, collapsing into bed. Then I did something I hadn’t done since my parents left.
I cried myself to sleep.
****
A pounding on my front door woke me from a fitful sleep. I sat up with a frightened gasp, bracing for the worst—until I heard Travis’s deep bellow.
“Emerly, open the goddamn door!”
The fact that he had the nerve to sound angry had me glaring at the direction his voice was coming from. I flopped back down in bed, having no intention of opening the door.
He could stay out there all night for all I cared.
I should have known he’d do no such thing.
Moments later the sound of the front door crashing open had me gasping in shock. His hulking frame appeared in my bedroom doorway a second later. The fact that he was still dressed in the suit he must have worn to his event sent anger surging through my veins. The further fact that he looked handsome as hell catapulted that anger into fury.
“Go to hell, Travis,” I bit out.
“Go to hell?” he demanded incredulously. “What the fuck were you thinking coming here, Em? It’s not safe.”
“I was thinking I’d rather put myself in danger than be under the roof of a man who lies to me,” I replied, cuttingly proud at my strong tone despite the tears that threatened.
His nostrils flared. “I didn’t lie.”
“You didn’t lie? Are you delusional?” I demanded. “You told me you had to work late.”
“I did,” he insisted. “That shit tonight was work.”
“A lie by omission is just as bad.” I shook my head. “I’m done.”
“It wasn’t a lie, by omission or otherwise,” he growled.
“You really believe that,” I murmured in shock. “You think not mentioning an event you were the keynote speaker at, that most men would invite their woman to, isn’t a lie.” I sighed sadly.
He stared back at me a flicker of doubt shining in his dark eyes.
“Are you ashamed of me? Did you want to take someone else?” I asked, unable to quell my dark curiosity.
“No,” he barked, appearing incensed by the very suggestion. “Fuck.” He rubbed at the back of his neck, appearing stressed. He came to sit on the edge of my bed. “It wasn’t something I thought through,” he admitted. “Thinking about it now, I guess maybe I wanted to shield you from it.”
I eyed him warily. “From what?”
“From that part of my work. I don’t like being in the spotlight, and I think you’d like it even less. I didn’t want to force that on you, not yet. And I think a part of me didn’t want to share you. What we have is the most precious thing I’d ever had. I wanted to keep it for me, for just a little while longer.”
“I may not like attention,” I allowed. “But I would have done just about anything for you. Seeing you speak would have made up for any awkwardness I may have felt. I could have gotten used to that part of your world. I’m stronger than you think.”
“You’re the strongest woman I’ve ever met,” he countered. “And why the fuck are you speaking in past tense?”
I took a deep breath, having to force some of the most painful words I’d ever uttered. “Because I meant it, Travis. I’ve shared more with you than I have with anyone. I forced myself to let you in, even when it was hard as hell. But you’re either unwilling or unable to do the same. I can’t do it anymore. We’re done.”
“We aren’t,” he bit out.
“You don’t get to decide this.” I shook my head. “I’m not yours. Not anymore.”
“The hell you aren’t!” he exclaimed, shoving off the bed in a move so abrupt it pushed the furniture back an inch. “You’ve been mine since that first night, when you leaned into me, tripping over your own two feet, trusting me to catch you. You’re the most real thing in my world. I love you, Em.”
“You had to say that now?” I cried. “When we’re over?”
“We’re not fucking over!” he bellowed, before visibly working to collect himself. “Look, I admit, I made a mistake. I should have told you about tonight. I knew you had a big day today, that you’d be tired. I didn’t want you to feel obligated to come with me. I wanted you to be able to come home and get some rest.”
The fact that that made perfect sense frustrated me even more. I threw up my hands. “So say that!”
“I should have,” he admitted, sitting once again on the edge of my bed. His large hand reached out, clasping my leg over the comforter. “I was trying to protect you, not hurt you. Swear it, Em. That’s the last thing I ever want to do. I’ll take you to every fucking event you want to come to. I’ll yell into the microphone that you’re my girl. That’s what I wanted to do tonight. I missed you like hell. I left early, wanting to catch you before you fell asleep. Coming home and finding the house empty—I never want to feel that way again, Em.”
I blinked back tears, unsure what to say.
“I love you, Emerly,” he repeated, his eyes smoldering with intensity.
I forced myself not to be drawn to him, to the words that made my heart pound with hope. “You need to let me into your life,” I rasped. “I don’t like all the secrets. I know there’s information about Roy, about Mabel that you’re not telling me. I’ve been through a hell of a lot worse than this, Travis. I can handle it,” I told him firmly. “What I can’t handle is having the one man I thought I could trust—lie to me,” I whispered hoarsely as tears slid down my cheeks.
“You can trust me,” he murmured, reaching out to wipe at my wet cheeks. “I promise, I’ll be better about letting you in. I wasn’t trying to keep you out in the first place. I’m just on the same autopilot I’ve been in for thirty-one years. I need a little practice.” He broke into a sad smile. “I’d do anything for you. I’m in love with you, Em.”
Hearing the words again left me uttering the only response possible. “I love you, too,” I murmured.
He let out a shuddering sigh a second before he pulled me into his lap, taking my mouth in a fervent kiss. His tongue met mine in a frenzied duel as his hands stroked my hair before moving down my back, pulling me closer until it seemed his goal was melding us into one.
“I’m sorry, babe,” he rasped against my lips. “Don’t leave me again.” His big body shuddered. “I’ve been in too many life-or-death situations to count, starved in the jungle, outnumbered ten to one. But a tiny blonde has the power to fucking destroy me.” He pressed his forehead to mine. “Let’s get home.”
I pulled back, looking at him cautiously. “Do we have to? I just, I missed it here,” I admitted. “Is it still unsafe?”
He pulled back with a deep sigh. “Probably not,” he allowed. “But probably isn’t good enough, not when it comes to you.”
I nodded, trying not to look disappointed.
“I need you to be straight with me—is it that you’re homesick, or just that you’re not comfortable at my house?”
I bit my lip, not at all eager to be honest.
“Babe?” he prompted.
“Your house is just so… echoey.”
He grinned. “Echoey?”
“Well, yeah.” I shrugged.
“Okay then, another question. Is it the house itself or the way it’s decorated?”
Did he mean the way it wasn’t decorated at all?
“I never thought about that,” I admitted. “Maybe the way it’s decorated,” I replied after a moment of thought. “It just feels sort of bare—everywhere.”
He chuckled. “Fair enough. Tell you what. I’d prefer to be at my place—it’s more secure. But I like the feel of your place a lot. Maybe you could help me make my place more comfortable?”
“I don’t want you doing that just for me,” I protested.
He pulled me close, his forehead pressed to mine as we shared the same breath. “What you said earlier? Same for me, baby. I’d do anything for you,” he returned without delay, repeating my earlier words. He pulled back, his eyes lighting with humor. “And plus, my sister has been on my ass for years, and the guys never say anything, but I know they feel the same way. This will get them off my ass.” He leaned in closer once again, his nose touching mine. “Plus, it’s selfish really—if you put your mark on it, maybe you’ll never want to leave.”
His boyish grin and the hope in his eyes had me grinning at him. “All right.”
“All right? Hell, yes.” He grinned, pulling me up and out of bed, obviously eager to get back to his place.
“At some point tonight, maybe I’ll actually get to bed.” I sighed dramatically, trying to hide my smile.
He stepped close, his nose skimming my neck. “Baby, once I get you home, I can tell you one thing, sleep will be the last thing on your mind.”
In the end, the exhaustion that tugged at me the next day had nothing on the memory of his body over mine, of my lips swollen from more kisses than I could ever count, and more than anything, on knowing my man loved me.
Not one darn thing.